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Forum Activity for @zacharias

Zacharias
@zacharias
03/05/21 07:10:40AM
204 posts

Family ties/awakening


Community

@alanjepsen , It's very interesting that you bring this up in the way you have. I shared Luke 12:48 recently with my Mother as a way to show her of what it was I was convicted of. In bringing it back up, it shows that I have more to consider. Good, I'm on the right track.

I do have that discernment. I know I do, but it is hard to believe in myself so much so that I act on it in a way that is positive. That fear and resentment gets in the way. By giving it up I don't respond to the anger and resentment of others. It's my responsibly to confront wrong behavior as Jesus himself did. As Paul did. Otherwise, I may be beaten with many lashes, because I know better. I get it.

If we can, as Empath, give up the basis of what hold us back, FEAR. We can do what we are called to do. Change yourself, and you change the world. It starts with that internal struggle. We can't be afraid of it. 

Thanks for the support

Zacharias
@zacharias
03/03/21 06:04:03PM
204 posts

Family ties/awakening


Community

@layla we all live under a self deception. It's a hard thing to realize it and even another to actually do something about it when we do. I have to give other people the grace to get there eventually. I've gone though many of those dark nights of the soul to get were I am at now, and there are probably more to come. I don't wish that on anyone yet I know that this is what it takes to put down our own evil and realize the good in us in order to share that with the world. It's more than self reflection, It comes from truly real self reflection. There is a difference. You can't give up your ego with your ego. The study of Zen has helped me see that. 

@alanjepsen I know what you mean. I may take that approach in the future. Coming at it as a biblical spiritual gift does help to soften the message, so to speak. It makes it more acceptable to a egocentric Christian. There is an issue, however, I have asked many Christians what their spiritual gift is. They always say the same thing; Discernment. I have a feeling that my father would say the same. I'll still ask. 

Zacharias
@zacharias
03/03/21 07:01:43AM
204 posts

Family ties/awakening


Community

My Mother had chosen three angry abusive men to marry in her life. She is an empath herself yet has never realized or accepted it. Even after her sister tried explaining it to her, she rejected the idea in favor of my step father's rigid belief system. She lives under the umbrella of self deception. It's a survival tactic she uses to protect her ego from the mistakes she has made. Her choices caused me to endure untold grief and anguish over the years. I have decided to start telling her about it more instead of protecting her from the truth. I still love her dearly, but I can not perpetuate these lies with my own child. 

My step father had raised me since the age of six. He was a good Christian man that read the bible every morning before heading off the work. The life he gave me was in constant conflict with him. His legalistic approach to religion was self serving. I gave up that conflict when I left the house, but now 30+ years later I realize it never really ended. He continued his judgement against me. He still blames me for the disruption I caused to his house hold(and boy did I!). I held on to the guilt of my youthful indiscretion for many years until I realized this was the basis of my resentment. The judgment from this man continues to this day in just about every conversation we have. I had to finally call him out and give both my parents a new rendition of the accepted history between us. I'm still in this process of breaking down past beliefs. 

So where do I stand? I'm not looking for vengeance. I want peace between us. I want a real relationship with my Mother before she dies. I want to explain empathy to her, and to my half brother, to my family. I want them to know I was never the man they claim I am or was. I am not close to any of them. I ingratiate myself to them without reciprocation. I had to give up placating them and simply speak the truth as I know it. I choose to give up resentment and fear. I wish they would do the same. 

My family believes that I'm causing the conflict that I desperately want to resolve. They have turned(once again) against me. My brother and cousins ignore me. My step father defends his opinions with a self righteous vigor. My Mother is still caught in the middle defending her husband and choice that she made. It is sad but I have to moved on. I still love them all and hope that one day we will have a reconciliation.

So today, I honor my Mother and the gift of life that she gave me. I let go of the baggage that wasn't mine to begin with. I understand her choices were based in the same fear we all face. I will continue to share my love for her and my step father and thank them for their love for me. Until that day comes.

Thanks @trevor-Lewis

Zacharias
@zacharias
02/24/21 11:01:30AM
204 posts

The Great Reset


Community

I know how you suffer. One day, you will see how much you are blessed for enduring it. I wish I could come by and just sit with you for a time. I do pray for you, Cat. We are very like minded.

Zacharias
@zacharias
02/24/21 10:29:22AM
204 posts

The Great Reset


Community

@cheshire-cat , We all do. I'm being surrounded by that dark energy. So yes, it is getting worse. What we are reacting to is very real even if no one around us notices. It takes a concerted effort to resist. I can't stand it anymore. I'm to close to the city, my neighbors have turned against me, and that dark energy is draining me to the point where I can't think. I have to take trips to the mountains to recharge and get my head right. It has broken me down.

In that deep depression, the answer came to me, don't resist. Let it happen. Get out of the way of the attack. Take the energy given and redirect it. I realized the pain was being caused by my resistance to it. I'm just not strong enough to take it on directly. They can't take away what I don't give them. It's my responsibility to hold on to my peace and sanity. It's not my job to change them. The world needs a reset of sorts. The chaos that's to come is necessary to restore order. They can't win. The nature of the universe doesn't work that way. 

P.S. Thank you for your comments. I could use an editor.

Zacharias
@zacharias
02/23/21 05:06:30AM
204 posts

Near Death Experiences?


Community

It's interesting that you bring this up now, Hop. I had been thinking about the moment in my life where it took a major turn. The impact on my belief structure, and the reassessment of my place in the world. Although, I wouldn't call it a NDE. I have had plenty of those close calls thinking "Hmm, I could have died". Car accidents, trees falling close to me, near lightning strikes, and so on. What I like to read about is actual death experiences where we are some how brought back to life. It shouldn't happen. We see death as utterly final. It's hard to get your mind past the fact that we can come back from it.

Mine was a 50ft fall at 19 years old. I didn't get back up. I laid there on the concrete for 8 hours without moving until I heard a voice that said "Wake up". I can't tell you a cool story of floating around or visiting heaven or anything like that. For the life of me I simply can't remember. All I recall was being on the top level of the school and immediately waking up the next morning at the bottom of the court yard trying to push myself up to assess what happened. It was as if no time had past. 

What changed my mind for me was not the death part of it, it was the aftermath. Here I was in the court yard of a school in the middle of summer. No one knew I was there. No one was coming to rescue me. I was severely broken and completely on my own. I had a choice to make, either fight to live, or suffer and die a slow excruciating final death. Before this I didn't value my life. I threw it away thinking a nihilistic thought; There is no purpose in it. 

I was mad at God for bringing me back. I could have peacefully checked out of existence, but no, I was denied that ending. It took a full 24 hours of moving through the school with a shattered leg and a broken back, not mention the knock on the head and many other broken bones. Rescue came in the form of a cop that cuffed me thinking I was a burglar. The point is after this experience I started to look at life differently. Not just mine, but the lives of others. I told this story recently to a friend who's facing 4th stage cancer. At the end I said to him, Death is easy, it's life that's hard. Fight to live. It all has a purpose. 

Zacharias
@zacharias
02/03/21 11:11:39AM
204 posts

The Great Reset


Community

Yes, what to think about all this? It looks to me that the reset button has been pushed. That everything happening has been planed well in advance. It's as if this whole world is nothing more than an orchestrated stage show playing out on little screens and none of it is genuine. I don't believe any of it. In fact, I've always felt this way, that the life we live isn't quite real. The only things I believed were truly real was pain and suffering and after a life time of agonizing over it I no longer believe suffering is real either. So why would I care what the elite globalist do? 

I'm a traditional anarchist. I won't be ruled over by man. There is no other ruler but God Almighty. He will make things right. I follow his lead. Let the elitist have their day. The pride of man comes before the fall of man. I'm having fun just sitting back and watching the movie. I am the most at peace when I am surrounded by chaos. 

I don't say this to mean there is nothing we can do about it and should just accept it. This is an opportunity to improve ourselves. Empaths are pushed harder by life because we've been given much more than most. Because of this much much more will be asked of us. It may take some time, but I believe this change is the birth of something great and it won't be what the elites have in mind. In a way they gave us a gift by waking up the masses to their complacency. We can use this. The "fake woke" are being exposed. I say just sit back, relax, and do what you do best: transmute the negative and send it back out as positive. This is the divinity of purpose. Be grateful you have one.

Zacharias
@zacharias
11/18/19 03:49:14PM
204 posts

Seeing Faces And Numbers Everywhere


Community

@cheshire-cat -i don't blame you. I stopped watching commercials for the same reason. We have to keep our vibrations high and not let anyone or anything pull us down. I learned recently that my emotional attachments can draw me back into old habits of dwelling on the negative. We don't need to be afraid of how things are, but we need to know. If it brings us down, you should get away from it and focus on good things for a awhile. Thanksgiving is coming up. When we are grateful is raises our vibe. Black friday is coming too. If you're anything like me, you dread the Christmas season. I'm not giving myself over to to dread this time.

@hop-daddy - The masks I see on those I believe have a spirit in them is like the mask that was worn by the magician on that old show where he was giving away the secrets of magicians. I can't remember what it's called. It's black with white lines. It isn't that scary. The faces I see are distorted and shifting. I also see flashes of light in strange patterns along with loud buzzing. I chalk it up to being half in half out of dream mode. I can't make sense of it. It's only been happening recently. This has been going on with you for awhile now. I'm interested in what conclusions you draw from what you're seeing, if you have any. Maybe not now, but in the future. For now I think we're all speculating.

Zacharias
@zacharias
11/17/19 10:37:24PM
204 posts

Seeing Faces And Numbers Everywhere


Community

My energy has been very low. I'm being drained more often. I know how, but I don't know why. I also see these strange evil looking faces and figures right before I fall asleep. At those times I sense a presence of something not right. It isn't clear to me what's happening. I identify with what you are all feeling. That something is happening I don't know enough to know what, but it is motivating me to find out. I also feel the need to rid myself of negative emotions and remain neutral. Hold on to my goodness so to speak as the world around me is falling apart. It's enough to drive you crazy if you let it, but the puzzle pieces are starting to form a picture I can understand.

Hop, when I see spirits, I watch them move around and "see" where they go. I sense their energy like I do from humans. I can read them and sometimes they communicate, so know I am perceiving them, but I also know that I am not seeing them with my eyes. In my memory I do. We remember things in images mostly and my mind is constructing an image of what I perceive. I think you're doing the same. The random patterns are showing you visually what you perceive. It's like your sub conscience is trying to tell you something your conscience mind doesn't understand. I'm sure you already know this. Please, keep pushing through the fog. We need to understand this. Knowing is half the battle. Right Michelle?

Zacharias
@zacharias
11/17/19 11:40:58AM
204 posts

Am I being gaslighted?


Community

When you gave me the link for Gnosis months ago I had started reading it and was distracted by everything going on. I didn't get back to it. In order to get through it I'll have to focus on it. I thank you for giving me all this information, but the overwhelming amount of it is daunting. It's going to take time to absorb it all. I'm only human. 

The most important thing I got out of quest for 'the holy grail' was a deeper understanding of why we need to love our enemies and what it means to turn the other cheek. This is golden! We are to love what they do for us. They give us this negative energy in hope that we give it back. I didn't know what to do with that energy before. Now I realize that if we transmute that energy we can use it to help others, the grateful. I'm going to practice this for a while and see what happens. Thank you all for your help. 

 

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