What is your biggest issue as an empath?
Wow, this was a powerful thread, I love the question. I want to answer my experiences.
So first, I want to say I can relate to you, @sasha-supertramp. I'm queer as well, although I experience the "everyone looking at you" thing others were talking about, or that feeling of being in the spot light. I grew up in a very conservative and christian home which had a very negative effect on me, causing me to actually hate myself at some point in my life (actually most of my life to date). It caused a massive amount of issues, and I only recently truly got comfortable with myself. I went on a date with a guy, but unknowingly to me it was to a more conservative area, and I could feel people genuinely staring at me, and being judgmental. It's one thing to feel people trying to figure you out, it's another thing when a ladies church group at a Panera bread move tables and stare at you the entire night (sadly I'm not making this up either). Most of the ladies actually were fine with us, it was a specific 2 ladies in that group, and one was angry about it. Thank god for my generation though, they'll stare for a moment, but then either not care, or have a "good for them" kind of reaction. anyway, the next thing was also being able to feel that someone feels lust for you and calls it "love". Massive turn off, and people don't understand.
Anyway, here's my list:
- Feeling like I'm in the spotlight, like others said and explained pretty well.
- Feeling drowned out by all the different energy in a room. People experiencing more intense emotions always grab my attention as well.
- When you finally feel a deep connection with someone, which is a powerful and wonderful experience, but then you look for that sensation of connection in every other person you meet.
- Being able to feel and see that not many people live a deep life. It makes me sad, but also frustrates me because people hold back.
- Picking up on emotions. I've actually got this almost under control, but I've always felt them "outside" of me. Even though this can be horribly draining for me, what hurts the most is when you can feel that someone is acting like you're good friends, but don't feel that way towards you. Or you can feel if someone has contempt towards you. I also hate it when people who "lust for me" are around me, or especially touch me. It feel so bad to me, and I can't stand it.
- Picking up on mentalities. Really I will feel restricted and held down around more close-minded people. I experience this a lot with my family, and I feel stuck and even lead towards expressing things I don't agree with. A few things I can pick up on are motivation, confidence, arrogance, how open or closed someone is, authenticity, etc..
- I also don't like when I know I don't like something in someone, usually I pickup on on bad intentions, but I have to wait for them to slip up before anyone will believe me.
- Picking up on whether a relationship will work out or not. This is really challenging because I feel at fault when I don't warn someone not to get too invested. I hate feeling one-sided relationships. I also hate how most people date just to date, or date to better themselves. No wonder a lot of people don't believe in love.
- Being more understanding and objective than most people. I find most interpersonal conflicts pointless and petty. My parents use me as their therapist/ mediator because I understand what's going on, but they still choose to cause each other issues, or avoid or try to twist what I point out. I can also feel the tension between people, so many times getting involved is mentally draining, and emotionally draining. I always find myself understanding everyone's point of view, and getting aggravated with other people when they make dumb comments about someone.
- I think the worst thing for me is I can't have a "normal" relationship. I make friends way too easily. People get very close to me, very easily, and always want to hang out. I never feel the same towards them. I am very picky about where I allow people to be in my life, but ever since I experienced real and deep connections with people, I don't want to be around any other people other than those I feel that way with. I'm very nice to everyone, and I'll be an ear for those people, but I don't like feeling stuck in relationships.
Another thing is the knowing people are lying, or aren't saying what they mean. People these days really don't know the difference between lust and love. They also don't let themselves feel all emotions they can and should. People are fake these days and I hate feeling that every time I go out. I hate social media because it's a constant reminder of that. Worst of all, I hate someone telling me they love me, but I can feel that it's not true.
updated by @loconnoro: 10/31/18 04:50:00PM