Anyone with experience resolving psychic bondage?

All4joy
All4joy
@all4joy
one month ago
9 posts

Hello,

I am an empath who is very psychic who is also a medium (people I know, who died, have visited me).  I am unskilled at these capacities, however, but I am learning.

I fell in love with an unavailable man 2 years and 2 months ago, who also fell in love with me.  (I am now in Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, and don't intend to ever do such a thing again -- it was very chaotic, dysregulating, destabilizing, and destructive to my health.)

At first we thought we were soulmates or twin flames.

Now I see that the energy exchange between us was SO strong because he is high on the narcissist scale, and I am high on the empath scale.  I understand this creates an "extreme energy exchange."

One of the first dreams I ever had about him was that he was a "harsh narcissist who would let me smash into the concrete alone."  It was one of the most memorable dreams of my life -- it felt like it came from galaxies away, and it was surrounded by very bright light.

I already had the "love blinders" on, and did not listen to this incredible warning.

The first year was not nearly as bad as the second year.  In the second year, this man started to telepathically talk to me 24/7/365.  Except the talk was abusive -- always telling me how I can't handle my own life and my own physical healing (I have chronic illness), and how I'm incompetent and incapable of it, so he's going to come in and direct and control each and every thing that I do, all day long.  I hear about 5-60 telepathic inputs from him, per hour.  It has been deeply dysregulating and torturous and tormenting.

I stopped all contact with him on Sept. 10, 2018.  The telepathic inputs have continued just as much, since then.

I became 100% certain that I could never be in any kind of relationship with him on Jan. 27, 2019.  The telepathic inputs have continued just as much, since then.

I have since found online the following terms:  psychic enmeshment, psychic bondage, narcissistic psychic abuse, soul takeover.  All these apply, I think.

For the entire 2 years and 2 months, I have heard him also like a radio-station in my head -- playing songs of what his mood is, in relation to our connection.  Love songs, heartbreak songs, cheating-on-me songs, him-being-suicidal songs (more of that last one, lately).

I also have felt his energy smashed and jammed into my chakras for this whole time -- no self sovereignty.

Among many things, I want to be able to be a "sovereign empath," where my energy field and chakras are MINE and MINE ALONE, for me to play in and enjoy.

I have found Abraham Hicks and Melanie Tonia Evans, and am working with those teachings, to try to heal my childhood wounds energetically (a very narcissistic mother who treated me, in the 3D, exactly as this man treats me, in his telepathic inputs), and to try to raise my vibration so he can no longer attach to me.

Have others experienced this?  Have others successfully resolved this?  Do others have additional suggestions for me?

Thank you for reading, for your time and attention, and any help.


updated by @all4joy: 02/19/19 10:20:35AM
All4joy
All4joy
@all4joy
one month ago
9 posts

Thank you for reading my post, and for your inquiry.

I have confirmed with him that I'm telepathic.  (We have been extremely energetically enmeshed -- I can feel his energy smashed/jammed into my chakras, which I have felt for over 2 years now.)

We had a relationship in the physical world, now it is just in the spiritual.

I understand psychic bondage to be when someone has psychically attached to you, but you have not consciously given them permission to be in your energy field, and they will not leave, no matter how hard you try.  (But you have allowed them to attach to your energy field, at some level of your being, through your trauma wounds, or vulnerabilities, or your equal-but-opposite vibration.)

I prematurely opened up all the way to him.  (I intend to never do that again.  I am learning a great deal, here.)  He was my spiritual teacher, and I opened all the way to get his teachings, and then all the way with love, and I'm sure that's how he was able to attach.

I understand that, even in romance, it is proper to have your energy field to yourself, if you are taking care of it right.

I'm a beginner.  There is a lot to the psychic/spiritual world.  I've been trying to piece it together for years (hard to do in this culture!), and I still feel like a beginner.

All best wishes to you.

Cheshire Cat
Cheshire Cat
@cheshire-cat
one month ago
1,388 posts

I've not had the experience you've had, so don't have ideas for you on how to end your feeling of psychic bondage, but do have an idea that may help prevent repeating this relationship pattern in future. You might try Alain de Botton on YouTube, and look for his video called "Why You Will Marry The Wrong Person". This explains how childhood imprinting is so strong it is not usually overcome by therapy, and we all marry our parents even when we try not to and then attempt to fix what was wrong in the original relationship. I did not have a Narc parent like you, but I had parents with other problems, and married someone like my father, despite doing all the "right" things not to repeat this. Reading on childhood imprinting in general should help too. Sorry I don't have time to look up the links right now for what I suggested or I would, but I wish you the very best in resolving this. It sounds ghastly! 

Chrisis
Chrisis
@chrisis
one month ago
62 posts

Break Trauma Bond: Modelling Technique To Recondition Mr Lizard
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VqR3nO0s8i4

Releasing Trauma Bond Linguistic Time Bind
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xArW-yvYHp0

Chrisis
Chrisis
@chrisis
one month ago
62 posts

@all4joy if you kindly accept my request: there is something else on the subject which I prefer to  not share on public

michelle
@michelle
one month ago
120 posts
@chriris
Interesting video, calling the limbic system, Mr. Lizard! 🤣
My problem with the trauma I experienced has definitely left me stuck in a loop. I have a genetic condition of Histamine Intolerance [lowered abililty to rid body of excess histamine, MTHFR] which I believe makes some more prone to developing persistant PTSD.

This has led to many, many triggers which cause mast cell activation in my body which are not all emotional such as extreme heat/cold, humidity, pain, fatigue, foods, meds, smells, chemicals and more which my brain registers as distress and in turn can trigger trauma memories.
At this point, one must work with the body chemistry to reach homeostasis, along with mind/body modalities.

Mast Cell Activation Syndrome: When the Immune System Goes Haywire
https://www.lymedisease.org/mast-cell-activation-immune-system-goes-haywire/

@all4joy
I am sorry to hear of your predicament. This person is the type of guru one must avoid. Very damaging and unethical of him to attach and feed off of you!

Thoughts which come to mind are to look @tigerlily posts on cutting and removing energetic cords of attachment and further research on this. Burn any photos you may have of him, or possesions of his. And recalling of soul fragments which he took or you gave away [unknowingly] I am waiting to work with a local indigenous shaman on soul retrieval. I have already met w/ him and need to set up our times. He will work with my son and I a medicine woman due to the nature of my trauma, which included, abduction, drugging, rape, beating and torture. I see a therapist weekly, mostly for support because the mental health field is terrible with trauma, in my experience. There are no meds for me for this as I have huge sensitivity to them and they activate mast cells and raise histamine.
See video at:

Psychiatry ignores trauma says Dr. Bessel van der Kolk (The Body Keeps the Score) – Everything Matters: Beyond Meds
https://beyondmeds.com/2015/02/07/psychiatry-ignores-trauma/

Plus, it is most difficult for others to understand the double whammy of being an empath and experiencing this type of trauma where someone's depravity is forced upon you.

And yes, you are correct; even in love relatioships one must maintain boundaries. Casual sex is best avoided too as all interactions form energetic links.

I am sending you thoughts of seeing you healed and well. ❤
Hugs,
Michelle
michelle
@michelle
one month ago
120 posts
@rose
The limbic system supports a variety of functions including emotion, behavior, motivation, long-term memory, and olfaction. Emotional life is largely housed in the limbic system, and it has a great deal to do with the formation of memories.
All4joy
All4joy
@all4joy
one month ago
9 posts

Cheshire Cat,

Thank you for this information on childhood imprinting.  And the Alain de Botton YouTube video.

Sounds good!  I will check all that out.

All4joy
All4joy
@all4joy
one month ago
9 posts

Chrisis,

I will check these out.  Thank you.

Chrisis:

Break Trauma Bond: Modelling Technique To Recondition Mr Lizard
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VqR3nO0s8i4

Releasing Trauma Bond Linguistic Time Bind
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xArW-yvYHp0

All4joy
All4joy
@all4joy
one month ago
9 posts

Rose,

Your experience sounds interesting and somewhat related.

My understanding of "enmeshed" is a more long-term situation -- where I literally feel this man's energy intertwined with my energy field all the time, for over 2 years.  I lose contact with myself and my own energy and my own emotions, in the process.  (Your experience sounds related, here.)  Mothers and their children can be enmeshed, which is where the pattern usually begins.  I'm just learning about "energy strands" (in a book by Denise Linn).  I guess another way of saying it (I still have so much to learn) is that there is a really heavy cord between 2 people, lots of energy mixing?

All4joy
All4joy
@all4joy
one month ago
9 posts

Michelle,

I think we are on parallel paths, though perhaps that is true of others in the empath community, as well.  I, too, resonate with the histamine intolerance/mast cell activation syndrome.  I am very dependent on anti-histamines right now, though I have to rotate them, and I have resorted to also using the kind that melt under my tongue (most brands have a melt-able version, for children), because I, too, have chemical sensitivities (and electrical, mold, and food) -- and the melt-ables do not cause such a stomach reaction!  I, too, have a lot of trouble tolerating medicines and medical treatment.  I am working with Abraham Hicks, to energetically release trauma patterning, and now Melanie Tonia Evans, to do more of that.  I believe my Complex PTSD is "the tip of the root" of all my environmental sensitivities and chronic illness.  I have read Bessel van der Kolk and many like him.  I agree that the current state of psychotherapy is not effective for trauma.  Even the new fields -- Somatic Experiencing, EMDR, neurofeedback -- usually only help to a degree.  We're in our infancy, figuring this stuff out.  Though a lot further along than prior generations, in the science of it.  The people who I know recovered from severe environmental sensitivities did pursue all sorts of treatments -- medical, psychological, etc. -- but ultimately felt "cured" by energetic release of held trauma.  I forget the name of the program that many have had success with, but it has the word "Quantum" in it (it's expensive).  Hopper and Gupta didn't work for me, though they have cured some.  Those programs were "too superficial" in terms of my own trauma.

I'm doing Low Dose Immunotherapy for EBV right now, which is helping my immune system/inflammation calm down.

I am wondering how my empathic abilities and energy field will change, as I do more medical and trauma treatment, and, likewise, how my medical and trauma issues will change, as I learn more about my empathic abilities and energy field...

I appreciate everything you said, and your suggestions.  I will follow up on them.

Very best wishes on your healing journey.

Sue

All4joy
All4joy
@all4joy
one month ago
9 posts

One last note: I don't have internet at home and access it at the library.  I do not come to the library every day.  And I am so energetically empathic, and unskilled, or imbalanced at this time?, that I get a lot of Other People's Energy (OPE) in my chakras, when I post to a large group like this one.  So last night was a really hard night for me -- too much OPE from posting here.  I really hope to eventually heal this issue, because community and support and learning together are so important!  It makes it so that I don't participate nearly as often as I'd want.  And, the smaller the group, the better (in terms of OPE) (for me).  Thanks to all for reading and responding.

michelle
@michelle
one month ago
120 posts
@all4joy
Hi Sue; thank you for your response.

I was born with HIT; it runs in my family. Before trauma, symptoms were more of a nuisance and the more severe symptoms were manageable. Histamine intolerance is related to Mast Cell activation syndrome because mast cells release histamine and other chemicals.

My immune system has become so out of control that it reacts 2 words spoken from me and to me; this also includes thoughts to and from. In the video I posted, the doctor says more or less the same.

I have learned much from Bruce Lipton, Gregg Braden, and others on how thoughts affect the body and health.

I only use antihistamines as a Rescue Remedy or Last Resort because continued use of them makes it very hard to get back to your baseline. Antihistamines only suppress symptoms they do not stop your body from making excess histamine. I use many supplements to support and correct deficiencies and to boost my methylation such as Sam-e. I also take supplements to support my adrenals and other endocrine glands affected by stress.

I am trying to get in to see an immunologist because I feel that at this time I need to try Mast Cell stabilizers. I wrecked myself by doing too much and cannot calm my system down. It is a perpetuating Loop where my symptoms are activating mast cells.

I hear you on OPE at forums and large groups online. I am sensitive to this also. However, what I have found is that fatigue physical or mental can activate mast cells and the process of reading and Responding saps my energy Supply... so it might not always be OPE affecting you.

I would ask that you accept a friend request from me so that we may compare notes on these conditions, as the Forum is more specifically related to being an empath and things related to. Although, I do believe that being an empath raises the possibility of certain health issues.

If you ever read the Ra books, it talks of certain souls who are known as Wanderers. Within those books, or another from this group called, The Wanderers handbook, it states that they are affected by what is known as allergies [which is largely what you/I deal-with..pseudo allergies to be more correct]. Wanderers are souls who travel galaxies and universes for various incarnations. I believe that I am one of these Wanderers. I was born with some of my memory before incarnation intact and remember who I am. I have said since my teenage years, that I'm not wired to live on this planet!

I believe that both you and your abilities will grow in ways that will Astound you as you heal.

Please take your time responding and only if you feel up to it. I fell on my hand yesterday and the inflamation is causing unbearable nerve pain..before this it was 2 weeks of neuralgia. I found the following in a government med paper to support my theory that HIT/MCAS causes neuralgia and neuropathy:

Aetiology and Pathogenesis of Trigeminal Neuralgia: a Comprehensive Review

SNIP:
Allergic hypothesis" of TN aetiology has also been proposed [88-91]. However, there is only indirect evidence that supports allergy might cause TN. This is often due to unexpected and irregular rise of the clinical symptoms, remissions and recurrences, sensitive to the provocative endogenous and exogenous factors, and finally the increased serum levels of histamine. We noted that under the influence of various damaging factors, such as getting cold, tonsillitis, chronic rhinitis, maxillary sinusitis, and chronic inflammation existed in the maxillofacial region can trigger local immune response. As a result, the amount of IgE secretion increases. The degranulating mast cells release biologically active substances, such as histamine, serotonin and others, into the intercellular space. Hence, histamine release and accumulation in the trigeminal nerve during a local allergic reaction plays an important role in the pathogenesis of neuralgia [92]. Furthermore, this process is confirmed by the data of our morphologic trigeminal nerve examination and histamine levels in peripheral blood and saliva investigations [92]. Thus, microscopic immuno luminescent investigation of peripheral part of trigeminal nerve rhizotomy specimens from the TN patients revealed many degranulating mast cells and conglomerates of immune complexes of various sizes (Figure 3A). During remission, mast cells were absent in the resected nerve trunks. Many disorderly scattered granules of different size and their accumulations were found in the internal and external epineurium of the trunks (Figure 3B). At the same time we have determined an increase of histamine level in the blood and saliva during the acute period of TN. Consequently the levels of histamine in blood were: 3.879 ± 0.342 μmol/l (mean ± standard deviation) and saliva 4.554 ± 0.513 μmol/l were statistically significantly higher (P < 0.05) when compared to the healthy individuals where the histamine level in the blood was 0.558 ± 0.063 μmol/l and in saliva 0.522 ± 0.001 μmol/l. Moreover, the concentration of histamine level in the saliva of the TN patients was significantly higher (P < 0.001) than in their blood. This fact indicates that histamine is released locally for those patients.
END SNIP
michelle
@michelle
one month ago
120 posts

@all4joy Forgot to mention something important for you. You said you were in Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous. Did you know that histamine intolerance gives you an incredibly high libido? This is well known by some researchers like Dr Ben Lynch.


updated by @michelle: 02/15/19 07:26:05AM
michelle
@michelle
one month ago
120 posts

@rose I watched a few episodes of, "You." Which character reminds you of an empath? I can't say I like any of the characters, except tbeir love of literature. Joe is a psychopath and and Beck is totally selfish. My favorite book on obsession is, "Of Human Bondage," by Somerset Maugham. This is an older book from another time [1915].

Of Human Bondage: Theme Analysis 20406080100 Average Overall Rating: 4.5  Total Votes: 1106 Human Bondage The broader theme of human bondage concerns the power games people play. The boys at Philip’s school are cruel and torment him for his deformity. It is unthinking cruelty for the most part: the rule of the more powerful over the weaker. But though cruelty produces suffering, it is not the focus of Maugham’s analysis. He is interested in the ways in which a person creates his or her own bondage to others, and what, if anything allows someone to get free. Even when he makes a friend of Rose at school, Philip, in his insecurity loses the friendship, for he becomes jealous of Rose’s other friends and then provokes Rose into breaking it off. He is horrified by how he makes the situation worse: “he had not been master of himself” (Chpt. XIX, p. 82). Ownership, power, control, jealousy, self-abasement—these are characteristic of the kind of love that Maugham identifies as bondage. The kind of love based on these qualities produces pain, shrinking of one’s heart, a lack of freedom and happiness. One-sided passions happen all through the story: “There’s always one who loves and one who lets himself be loved” (Chpt.LXXI, p. 377). Norah loves Philip and Philip loves Mildred who loves Griffiths and Griffiths wants to get rid of Mildred. Maugham goes further to describe what would be called “addiction.” Philip rejects the love of Norah, which is healthy and makes him feel good, for a hopeless cycle of addiction to Mildred who is unworthy and causes him extreme suffering. Yet he seems to have no control over his passion for her. She despises him, uses him, and he asks for more: “he did not know what it was that passed from a man to a woman, from a woman to a man, and made one of them a slave” (Chpt. LXXVIII, p. 418). Maugham knew the priniciples of masochism whereby a person seeks out that which reinforces shame and humiliation. He builds up a case for why Philip would act this way. Deprived of parents too soon, he is thrown into the world with no defenses. In addition, his clubfoot is like a magnet that attracts cruelty. He feels a lack of confidence and simultaneously shuts people out and tries to force love where there is no hope. Norah builds up his self-esteem, but he doesn’t love her; Mildred tears it down, and his soul craves her. Maugham once said that only unrequited love lasts. He felt embarrassed when someone truly loved him. This is possibly a lack of self-love, not feeling worthy. This would fit Philip’s case since from childhood he has been abused as different and unlovable. On the other hand, sometimes Philip wants to prove his superiority to the person degrading him, as when he gives the money to Griffiths and Mildred to spend the weekend together. He creates his own misery to prove how base they are. He convinces himself he is a victim but knows that he has handed them the whip. People are often trapped in victim relationships when, like Philip, they have some past trauma they keep repeating in their behavior. Maugham shows how Philip slowly works his way out of the addiction through experience and self-analysis, but even at the last, when he thinks he sees Mildred on the street, his heart leaps, and he knows that he will never be free of it till death. Freedom of Thought and Lifestyle Although Philip searches for belonging and love, he has an equal need for autonomy and freedom. Because of his deformed foot and the rejection he receives, Philip “was forced to think for himself” from an early age (Chpt. XIII, p. 50). In school, “He yearned for freedom. He was weary of repeating things that he knew already” (Chpt. XX, p. 83).  When Mr. Perkins the headmaster tries to convince Philip to be ordained as a minister, he thinks, “I won’t, I won’t” (Chpt. XX, p. 85). He escapes to Heidelberg where “He revelled in his freedom”(Chpt. XXIII, p. 100). At first, it is a freedom of lifestyle. Soon, he has a chance to discuss new ideas as well. Wharton, his math tutor, tells him, “In France you get freedom of action . . . In Germany . . . you may think as you choose. . . in England you get neither: you’re ground down by convention” (Chpt. XXIII, p. 102). In Germany, he meets the old revolutionary, Ducroz, who has spent his life fighting for human rights but now is a broken old man with no money. Philip does not think of fighting for political freedom like this but personal freedom. When he hears Hayward and Weeks discuss religion, he realizes he no longer believes: “Freedom! He was his own master at last. From old habit unconsciously he thanked God that he no longer believed in Him” (Chpt. XXVIII, p.126). His drudgery in an accounting firm in London sends him to Paris where he lives the bohemian life of an artist. He enjoys the life of the cafes and discussions. The young men are influenced by Cronshaw, an older poet, who teaches them to get their own experience of life. Philip decides he cannot rely on anyone else: “Each man was his own philosopher” (Chpt. LIII, p. 282). He comes to a new  vigor in life by accepting Darwinism: “The free man can do no wrong. He does everything he likes—if he can” (Chpt. LIII, p. 283). His passion with Mildred teaches him the opposite, for he is a slave to her. No reason can free him from his “bondage.” In his search for the meaning of life, he looks at Cronshaw’s Persian carpet and finds there is no meaning. This sets him free, for he realizes that Mildred just follows her own nature, as he follows his. It is when he meets the Athelnys that he finds a practical example of freedom. Thorpe Athelny walked away from his upper-class wife and found happiness with the servant Betty and their nine children, living a joyous and natural life, free of social pretension. The simple goodness of the Athelny family is the freedom he finally espouses. The Mixed Nature of Life As Philip matures, he sees life has both good and bad. He is always looking for a philosophy or way of life that will resolve these paradoxes for him, but it depends on the moment how he evaluates the world and people around him. As a child first discovering the cruelty at his school, he feels “life was a dream,” a nightmare, from which he will surely awaken to find his mother (Chpt. XI, p. 46). On the other hand, when he reads books, like the one with the illustration of the Hall of the Thousand Pillars and the boat tied there, ready to “tempt the unwary,” his imagination is stirred by the many possibilities of life (Chpt. IX, p. 37). These two poles of the bad dream and the good dream are found throughout life. When he first loses his religion, he looks down into the Rhine valley, and “it seemed that it was the whole world which was spread before him, and he was eager to step down and enjoy it. He was free from degrading fears and free from prejudice” (Chpt. XXVIII, p. 126). After Fanny Price’s suicide, however, he goes to a Paris dance, and is shocked by seeing the animal nature of humans: “the meanness of their faces, and the cruelty . . . the stupidness . . . Philip loathed them, and yet his heart ached with the infinite pity which filled him” (Chpt. XLIX, p. 261). After stepping down into life and getting his hands dirty with its extremes, he learns to take both good and bad together. As a doctor working in the slums, he decides life is neither tragedy nor comedy. “There was neither good nor bad there. There were just facts. It was life” (Chpt. LXXXI, p. 439).

SOURCE: 

https://tinyurl.com/yxgyh4j8

There is a black white movie, while good, but could never cover the subtleties and intricacies that the lengthy book does.[1934]It does not cover Philip's childhood. This movie made Betty Davis a star and she plays a selfish bitch perfectly. Leslie Howard [Ashley character in Gone With the Wind movie] plays Philip. Here's the full movie:

    


updated by @michelle: 02/16/19 01:27:56PM
All4joy
All4joy
@all4joy
one month ago
9 posts

Thank you, Michelle and Rose, for your replies.  I read them both with interest.  I am overwhelmed right now, with starting the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program, by Melanie Tonia Evans (requiring a minimum of one hour of energetic healing work per day).  So my attention, time, and energy are diverted to that right now.  They do not speak much of psychic experiences on that forum, though (it seems to be fairly disallowed in the Code of Conduct there), so I will continue on here, for a place to explore that aspect of my narc. abuse.

Michelle, The Wanderers idea is interesting.

My understanding from Spiritism is that we are each disincarnate, eternal souls, who incarnate in many bodies, over many lifetimes, on many different planets.  Your info is new to me.  There is always much more info.  The universe seems to be quite a wild place.  So much stuff going on outside the 3D.

I have heard of "You" but I don't have t.v. access.

That's the first I've heard, of "Of Human Bondage" -- an apropos title for this thread Happy

All4joy
All4joy
@all4joy
one month ago
9 posts

"but also acknowledging the positive/negative energy being exchanged in one aspect of what's consciously going on in the physical world Vs what's going on in the spiritual as in internally/subconsciously"

that's a good way to say it, Rose -- a lot more can be going on than meets the eye -- I'm trying to assume more control of all that stuff

michelle
@michelle
one month ago
120 posts
@rose
I take no offense at anything you've said. You feel like one whose thoughts run very quickly, with anxiety or not...I am like this.

Anxiety can be a monster. I hate it. To get a handle on it, my way was to learn about the brain, its parts and functions...then learn about what affects it from my diagnoses and supply what my body isn't making/doing so well...for me, it's stress and stressors; treating my adrenal system helps much....although you might differ. I encourage you learn as much as you can health wise to balance spiritual studies...We are: Mind, Body and Spirit.

And, I'd like to see you enjoy your 'earthly life' to its fullest! 😊

Cheers,
Michelle

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