Dating another — empath + empath = bliss

mariposa
@mariposa
7 months ago
8 posts

Thoughts and experiences?


updated by @mariposa: 06/13/19 03:56:38PM
Hop Daddy
Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
7 months ago
1,053 posts

We've had others come on here commenting on this topic in the past. I think it can be challenging for two empaths to be in love and feel each other so deeply. You would think that would be a good thing to feel love so purely and on an emotional energy level (and to understand each other). And there are definitely some good parts to that. But since every relationship has ups and downs, feeling each other's low emotions would be very hard and potentially draining. Especially since we empaths are prone to being moody.

Green_Star
Green_Star
@green-star
6 months ago
11 posts

@hop-daddy yup, couldn't have said it better myself! As you can Imagine I once dated an empath and at first things were okay until we started getting more serious and that's when it all went downhill. It becomes more of a power struggle as we both want to be "in charge" of the relationship. Bad times Sad

mariposa
@mariposa
6 months ago
8 posts
I know that many of you are speaking to others’ experiences.

Having been with my gentleman for nigh seven years, I must say that we have gotten a hold of each other’s rhythms. We experience an extremely deep and spiritual emotional energy between us. Our communication is much easier than in previous relationships, because we understand how the other feels. We strongly feel like natural partners.

Unlike many troubled people here, I am not a moody person. My gentlemen, on the other hand, clearly has emotions that can swing hot and cold. we match each other, in that we complement each other.

In general, I am an emotionally even keel type of person. I am very calm – and I had control of my empathic abilities from a young age. So while I Sympathize with many people’s experiences with being empathic, I cannot empathize with their difficulties. If you are familiar with MBTI, I classify as a an INTJ.

We both have abilities outside of being an empath, and in my opinion, he is more powerful than I am. I enjoy learning and experiencing our spiritual relationship.

I know that many people are different. But instead of receiving digest of others experiences, I wanted to see individual experiences. I think you both for your input, however.
mariposa
@mariposa
6 months ago
8 posts
*thank
michelle
@michelle
6 months ago
228 posts
@mariposa

It sounds as if you have found what I refer to as a balancing partner. They do not have to be a romantic interest but many times are found in frienships. And yes, I have found that in friendships, but not romantic ones.

My observation is that there are more empaths now, or those waking to that gift, than when I was younger...I just didn't meet other empaths, they weren't there.

At my age and because of experiences, I'm not looking for romance. I'm also an ENFP and definately bore the wanderlust of that personality type, having 38 homes in 5 different states and many towns and cities....I've been in my current residence for 20 years [stayed put to raise my son], so you can imagine how much moving that was...7 moves were with my parents...the rest my moves. Didn't leave lots of time to develope long romantic intetests, but I did keep in contact with many, some friends some lovers.

Also, I never needed a relationship to define myself, something I see a need of in many.

However, my son is an empath and I have had a 26 year relationship with him [had him at 35 years] and that is not easy. We can tend to bounce off each other's energies. This is in part that we are both Virgos....maybe a big part, and are, in truth, very much like each other. I'd roll my eyes when my mum would say, "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, Michelle." She's right of course. 😒 Anyway, the fact that Son and I are so much alike, doesn't make us good balancing partners.

I'm going to split hairs here when you mention moody and troubled, concerning others here at the community. I look at the terms moody, or in your case, even keeled, as describing temperment. And troubled as a way to describe the effects of past experiences. It's no secret here that many have had traumatic upbringings and/or experiences. And this tends to affect our other life experiences.

Perhaps you are one of the lucky ones who hasn't had very bad experiences or are of a type which is more resilient to them. And if you have overcome past experiences, please do share how you did this.

Also I would be interested in how you learned to manage your being an empath while young.

I am glad for you and any other who find a relationship which you are describing...it just seems to be rare. Do you and your gentleman have to work on any issues?


--

I was abandoned by wolves and raised by my parents.
mariposa
@mariposa
6 months ago
8 posts
I was very resilient. I grew up with a narcissistic mother, who refused to give me love and hugs , which I desired.

I came into this life with more knowledge than most. From an extremely young age, I was forgiving adults for what they were doing to me, because I had a sort of future vision where I was looking back on my current experiences. It is easy to forgive anyone of anything when you have this view because you understand that humans have frailties.

I did not have to go through the disappointment of having a parent on a pedestal and having them fall from that pedestal. I saw them as faulty human beings from as early as I can remember.

As an empath, I also have the ability to read truth. Especially when someone is speaking directly to me, trying to convince me of their “truth“ . So when people would tell me a falsehood, I would call them out on it. Their reaction most of the time? “You have no proof. “

Not a denial. Not a fight over my supposition . Just, “you have no proof“.

And not only truth, I knew that often times what a person was feeling. As I was dealing with my own emotions, and recognized that I was experiencing things that made no sense to my current circumstances — I started to block everything that was not mine.

I cannot explain “the how”, except to say that I have an extremely strong will power. So I turned my will power inward, And structured my input and output so that I would only be concerned with myself.

Sure, many people will cringe at this — because it is very selfish, and empaths are here to heal. But it was survival for me, and as I have aged, I have opened myself up more. Everything is a learning experience.

As for my gentleman and I, yes we have issues to work on. Some of the ashes are large, and others are small. Regardless, we have a mentality of being a team and working together through the issues. We love each other more, with each issue we conquer.
michelle
@michelle
6 months ago
228 posts
Very cool, mariposa. I too was born with some of my memories intact and not wiped.

I can't say I went into any type of survival mode because of my parents. They gave 7 kids a good home and life, although Dad stuggled with intimacy of the family, he was a good father, Mum had her issues too...we did better than most. I felt good growing up in my family but we did have severe tragedies. Still, I grew more 'open' as an empath.

I've had those lightbulb momentents when I've seen parents and family members and others as just people struggling the way we all do.

Strong will power is part of your personality type. I see how we choose these things before incarnation here, 'to get the job done.' Just as my personality type gave me 'tools' to get my 'job' done.

Thank you so much for your response. I look forward to hearing more from you.

Cheers,
Michelle


--

I was abandoned by wolves and raised by my parents.
TigerLily
TigerLily
@tigerlily
6 months ago
498 posts
@ mariposa sounds like you have a match, and energy wise match together. Over the years being here at EC, unfortunately not many have the same luck you have. The energy pulls people apart. Compared to the unaware out there, the dating pool really shrinks for an empath lol!

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