It seems unreal but it's been over 3 yrs and still it stays and won't leave I dont know what "it" is even if it's paranormal or interestial MAYBE INSANITY
For those who have heard my plight
I know now it has nothing to do with spiders
There are not words to even try to describe it to myself but I will try....
Always when it's dark but sometimes in the day It starts with a slow crawl in groups slipping over walls up down across whatever Sometimes it's dark and foreboding Can be light more delicate or sparkly like a zillion stars are around
It breaks away into smaller groups Especially if I look their way smaller somewhat statically shapes will rush me I don't wait I close my eyes turn away Sometimes they try to emulate a person or animal but I don't buy into it
The man's face is still there wanting to probably take my breath or maybe my life I don't really know He's sneaky & persistant I can send him away but he still tries to come back from a different angle Now that I think about it he's only there when my eyes are closed like in the shower Also when I walk into my bedroom when it's dark I will see a momentarily oval light
I thought they were there only in the dark but I find it's not my vision going I am actually looking through an opaque whispy vapor like whatever? They are all always in perpetual motion
Wherever I am, I am actually encased
I try my best to ignore not think about it but eventually it's just there
It knows if I am trying to think of a way to rid it or try to communicate about it
Example I typed half of this left for a minute come back even the screen I was typing on was gone
Ergo why it took so long to contact anyone I believe it's preventing me in a way because I mean to then I say maybe tomorrow Of course I wil be punished
This is even harder to explain but the worse part
There are curtain like sheets draped over furniture mostly living room When it's really annoyed it drapes over walls and doors Most pretty much everything
I can't see through it I can put my hand through it and not see my hand
In the beginning I did walk through once and it was freaky like an alternate universe
When it drapes I can't see anything because it's pattern and has color
I can't see anything but the drapes It is very disorienting I literally have to feel my way to figure out where I am going I so far have hidden it from my husband He freaks out Wants me to see a doctor Why am I the only one seeing these things when no one else is? etc
It can become panicky when I can't find my closet door in the hallway or I continue to my bathroom but bump into a built-in linen cabinet trying to find the door to the potty All the while feeling along moldings to find the door and then feel the wall for the light switch
I have tried all kind of things others have tried to help but it seems I am the square peg trying to fit in a round hole
I can not do anything that would alert my husband He was bad enough when I had visitors He doesn't know anything is going on any longer
I have not even been anywhere without him because I keep having problems with illness and symptoms without remedies Labs off in general but can't pinpoint cause Just enough to take me out of the game
I often wonder could the "force" be causing it I do feel a gravitational pull when it's near me and sometimes I get weird tingles that goes through my body for a few seconds
I got a new car for my birthday 1 1/2 yrs ago and only driven it once I don't feel I am in control enough to chance it
OK So I always think I'm gonna jot down a few lines and as usual it turns into a book... Sorry 😒