Lately I just feel like the world is changing but not fast enough.Like something will happen and I don't know what.Like this nagging feeling of a clock slowly ticking and we don't know when it's going to stop.Surprisingly a lot of people feel like that.What I really hate though is I can predict what will happen and sometimes I know what will but it's like I can't stop it it just happens.I feel everything I get lost in myself.I am good at controlling it I over think things. I know I feel never be normal,but I feel like there is a calling for me I don't know what it is but it's reaching and I can't quite reach back because I want my fiance there with me.I don't know if he wants that.Honestly I know he doesn't.I am an empath and he isn't. It's hard not being with an empath he doesn't quite understand. but I don't want an empath because then there is no privacy.I feel so much potential in him like he could be very spiritual,but he doesn't want to be.I just don't understand why.Also he has night terrors but he hasn't had many since we got together.It's like I protect him or have his nightmares instead.I don't mind much because I can control my dreams well.
I am working in customer service and as an empath.Worse thing to do is be surrounded by cranky people all day without coming unglued.I have managed pretty well 95 % of the time.I have a job offer in a warehouse no customer interaction,but I have a problem that I can't solve but I want to fix it.Okay new job wants me to start right now but I have good people at the place I'm at.I like them but come on it's customer service less pay and I get treated crappy.This is good benefits away from people and good pay.I literally can only give one day notice.How can I turn this around.Be honest and brutal I can take it.Plus I still want to shop there.
Lately I will wake up out and someone will call my name.Idk or how.Anytime I ask my boyfriend he says it wasn't him.
I was sick yesterday no voice.Today a little better.My alarm went off late which is weird because I know I set it for 7:00 not 7:30.Then I went to work.Still got there on time even though I walked.Everyone one was surprised to see me.I was doing okay not good not bad.When I have three past lifew memories 3 of the worse ones whenever 5 min of each other.I broke down at work and everyone told me to go home.I don't know what is going on.
I have had dreams about my past since I was 15.Almost 10 years.I have been a slave in Egypt a diplomatic daughter in Victorian Era.A dancer in World War Two.One thing I noticed it's the same mistakes the same people the same loves of my lifetime.I always wondered if I am so aware of it all of my past life and my abilities why do I come back.And then I realized I come back for him every time to see my love.I would rather be a spirit but I just want one good life with him before I go.One last try one more time to get it right.These past life's are filled with traumatic families,tragic love stories,but I face it all just to see him.This little passage of time is worth all the heartache the struggle.I know selfish I could help people and I do and I love doing it but I love him just a little bit more.I know all the mistakes I shouldn't make but I make them.I know all the ways to change my life for better but I don't I make his life better I make him happier.I know that each love feels different.Some are sweet and fluttery some are lustful and passionate.Others are like dying embers a slow burning painful love like daggers.It all feels different from start to finish.But this one feels pure happy and unfiltered.But it all ends the same in heartache and I will do it until I get it right.
My friend is cursed.It is so bad she has to use white sage everyday.Someone took a lock of her hair put it on a doll and cursed her.I want to help to reverse it.I personally cleanse her spiritual whenever I see her but it's draining and feels like it just comes right back
This seems weird but honestly when I am mad or frustrated I feel as though I can do more with my ability.Like it is easier to do bad with it then good.Now I am trying to do all the bad things I was taught in a good way.It's different but nice.Very hard to use my gift carefully then reckless.
I finally got rid of the spirit.I have been having great dreams and then I had one today. It was this rush of power that I could been anyone to my will with my emotions and aura.I did and entire town was under my controld in the dream.It felt amazing.Then I woke up and I felt different I felt bad but I liked it.I want to be the most important person in the room but not that way.Not by hurting others