By Paul Watkiss, 2017-02-18
Society largely considers what is normal by the agreed consensus of the majority. If I was in complete agreement with this then most of my communication in the outside world would consist of the phrase under which this is written.
Indeed being empathic ( energetically sensitive) I feel that many of us find growing up and maturing in the outside world something of a unique challenge.
At an early age we may discover that we are different from our peers and often our parents.
The constant emphasis when at school and by others on the physical, percievable, allegedly concrete world felt as if most people only lived in a 2D reality. Their world seemed to have little depth, a linear monologue of an existence.
My awareness of my sensitivity and my spiritual path are inextricably entwined. Indeed being energetically sensitive has helped create a somewhat unique spirituality in me that is reflected in many aspects of other belief systems ( that is Buddhism, Hinduism, Pantheism and Taoism to name a few).
Through many conversations that I have had with others with similar experiences it seems we have much in common when it comes to living our lives and the challenges we face. For example, having been born into a society which operates on a model that is the antithesis of what we feel to be right. This can lead to :
- subsequent feelings of loneliness and alienation which may lead to social withdrawal, addictive behaviors ( in order to numb our sensitivity) or wearing a socially acceptable mask in order to fit in.
If we do this however we compromise our ability to individuate and fully bloom into complete self actualization. This may leave us feeling unfulfilled and frustrated.
- having to constantly assert our needs to others as most people presume that our needs must be similar to theirs ( in terms of space, down time, opportunity to be creative etc)
- finding oneself in constant conflict with others and institutions that prioritize materialism and egotism
- having the desire for honest, open, loving human contact but mostly having to compromise due to the apparent lack of individuals who are unable to form relationships that do not involve some degree of attachment and / or dependence.
Despite the difficulties encountered on my path and the many years spent in a spiritual wilderness, it has all been worth it. For every challenge I have faced has shaped me and furthered my understanding of the world in which we live.
The ability to experience the external and internal worlds in such a searing depth and excruciating beauty has led to a true appreciation of lifes pulchritude.
Any solace that I have needed has come largely from my inner self and has not been found in relationships within my social circle. For those that have found some with others, you are truly fortunate.
So if over the years, you yourself have been your main source of solace, rest assured.
To have retained your authenticity and to still be here is testament to your inner strength and tenacity.
By Paul Watkiss, 2016-07-27
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By Paul Watkiss, 2016-04-29
For me, having what can only be described as 'empathic' tendencies means many things, far too many to mention here. One of the main ones however is that I tend to know why others act in certain ways or become the people they are. Most individual characteristics be it the ability to empathise, enjoy or not enjoy certain aspects of life or whatever seem to stem from childhood experience. The spoilt child who feels they have a right to certain things, the fatherless or motherless child who may seek to compensate in their own adult relationships. Most people seem to me to either be indifferent to other peoples suffering or seem all to ready to create it in order to promote themselves in some way.
The point I'm making is that an empaths life can often feel lonely because whereas many people judge, castigate and ridicule others, we, myself included feel nothing but compassion. Compassion is a really difficult thing to share I find as many see it as weak or being too 'soft'.
However it is extremely important to maintain this attitude in the face of such lack of understanding. It is even more difficult as we often find ourselves alone in our compassion for others.
As has already been said, we need to be the change we wish to see in others.
By Paul Watkiss, 2016-03-02
I believe many of us who have some degree of empathic trait have found themselves walking a more spiritual path for many reasons, one of which ( and I include myself ) is due to traumatic events in our younger years. These have led us to question our lives and society as well as to seek out why many problems exist for us as humans. These are my current thoughts :
I'm quite cynical about academic qualifications which seem to have to be a precursor for anyone to be able to publically comment on life and its themes / goals etc. Academia in any subject because of its very nature serves to blinker the individual to their field whereas in real life there is no black and white, no discernable division between anything only what the human mind and senses suggest.
At a very basic level it seems individuals have varying degrees of awareness outside themselves. There are those whose life is lived in a very mechanical, egoistic manner where little or nothing is percieved outside of themselves . For want of a better term there are then perhaps HSP's and people with empathic qualities who are able to understand and incorporate others emotions and feelings in an altruistic way. This then gives rise to a more holistic approach to living in that any other is not just discounted.
One could say individuals can go further, indeed the experience of Advaita suggest that perhaps the ultimate reality is one of nonduality ( as suggested by quantum physics and many Eastern belief systems ).
The fact is that as a species the human race lives a paradoxical reality. In that as humans we all have more or less the same needs i.e. to be safe, secure, loved, acknowledged, to protect those we care for and to fight those that may threaten us. Thus most our life and energy is spent ensuring a basic level of survival, that is survival of the self and those close to us. This however is in contrast to those people who have seen beyond this and have to acknowledge that in some way we are all individually responsible for the wellbeing of all others, perhaps even of other life forms be it plants and animals. To a lesser degree the need to minimise any harm which may be a result of our actions.
If everyone was to accept this idea it would radically turn around human ( and the planets ) pattern of existence. We would have to accept our presence as only part of an immeasurably linked web of co-existence and thus remove ourselves from being a dominating force in the suppression of other species and as a parasitic race upon the Earth.
For this to happen is almost unimaginable as the dropping of I ness and ego centred behaviour by individuals and countries would lead them to perhaps being vulnerable to exploitation by others who cannot or are unable to subscribe to this premise. There is therefore seen the need to continue the idea of dualities / distinctions and the existence of others.
The only other that ways the change may materialise is possibly
a slow, gradual change in individual consciousness over time leading to an eventual consensus of understanding. This is hard to believe as despite our access to information / education is now so more than ever there seems to be no shift in perspective.
-The other possibility is that due to some man made or natural catastrophe that the human developmental path is altered drastically and a new set of constructs emerge with the change necessitated by this substantial catalyst.
The latter could almost be seen as the planets / universes response to creating a more cohesive and less damaging ecosystem in which the world could exist more equitably. There may of course be other ways in which this transformation may take place, one can only guess.
In summary, there are many ideas / beliefs that falsely separate us as humans I.e I am a Christian / Buddhist / agnostic/ conservative/socialist. Also in terms of identifying oneself as a human and not part of the 'whole', the planet,the Universe. As long as humans think and act in terms of divisive adjectives and differentiate themselves from the whole of existence I feel our fate is predestined. One only has to look at the age of the Earth and the Universe to realise that our manifestation is most likely to be an indiscernable blip in the stream of time.
By Paul Watkiss, 2016-03-01
We know you know.......
That feeling of being in isolation ( in terms of how we view life through the ego and the subsequent mass delusion of society itself ) is an unnatural state.
Although we do not 'remember' as such, at some level most of us are aware that living life as a human who's actions in life are the result of a belief of being separate is a falsehood.
Perhaps before we are 'born' and when we 'die' part of us again becomes seamlessly one with the universe, our essence again dissolved into all that is, into being complete, into peace.
As humans we seek a barely identifiable unity, a feeling of wholeness, of being complete. Some seek it through relationships, some through goal achievement, some through spiritual means and some still through intoxication of the senses leading to a dissolvement of the perceived boundaries of self.
This has gone on through all of man's existence and can be seen by his past and current belief systems i.e. building of stone circles ( signifying perhaps a 'unity' ), animism and actions to enable insight through meditation and prayer for instance.
Frustratingly many of us are aware that society largely is constructed in a way that works against this understanding.
How different life and relationships would be if from childhood we were all brought up with a sense of oneness with the world and each other.