Lavinia

What is going on?

2011-04-15
By: Lavinia
Posted in:

Since I've found out I'm an empath ( almost 1 year ago) this have been changing so much in my life. At first it was great. I learned I was not alone in this, I found people who I can relate to on a much deeper level, found this site and met some truly wonderful people, I learned a lot more about myself and how to handle certain things I wasn;t able to before.

But lately, things have been changing. I don;t know if it's good or bad but I feel like my entire spiritual DNA ( if that term even makes sense) is changing. I don't even know how to begin attempting to explain this...This first thing that stands out right now is my health. I've been getting sick lately with things that I never had trouble with before and healing in areas where I've had trouble most of my life. I had a sever break down that almost pushed me over the edge ( something I never though I'd want); God only know what kept me from ending my life... I've had an epilepsy episode (!!!! where did that come from???); never had trouble in that area; now I trouble with my ears, head pressure, skin issues, eye problems..These are all new, in the last few months. Problems I never had before.

I've recently began looking into spiritual meanings or diseases and I can see very clearly how these problems are cause my changes; or better yet, my challenges with these spiritual changes. I can't say I'm surprised that they are having an effect on me, but what I do find surprising is how rapidly they are materializing in my body. A few months ago I became overwhelmed with this empathic ability and with everyone's problems. It was too much and I started going into a shell where I didn;t want to hear anymore of people's issues, let alone be responsible for someone else's life. Now I have ear problems and head pressure. How did that happen so fast?!And it's the same with every other problem I have. They just happen so fast. In a way, I think it's better cause I can tell what I'm doing wrong. I can connect the problem with the cause a lot easier.

But all of this is making me feel like I have to be perfect all the time and I feel pressured somehow. Like I have a big responsibility.

The same with food and everything I take in every day. I've started eating a lot healthier and taking better care of myself. But I can't take any breaks. If I allow one things to slip, it's making me sick. I can;t even have french fries anymore without feeling sick for 2 days. Not to mention fast food or anything like that, something I stopped having all together months ago.

I know it's better for me to live lie this, dont get me wrong...I just feel like I'm allowed to make any mistakes without paying for them twice as much.

It's the same for everything else. Not just food. If I get upset, if I allow myself to get angry, or hurt by something someone said or did. They are all having too much of an effect over me. I've become so much more sensitive than before. To everything, not just the bad things. Relationships too...everything is changing and having a bigger effect on me than before.

I don't mean this is sound like a rant...I'm just trying to understand. Why is this all happening? And how can I slow things down? Or speed myself up to match what is going on?

Things are changing so fast..I hope I don't go crazy.

Lavinia
04/15/11 12:37:49PM @lavinia:

Thanks guys! I really appreciate your responses!

I do meditate and it does help a lot.

I'm trying my best to stay calm and not get overwhelmed by this vortex of energy I've been sucked in. It's good in a way, I feel like I'm moving closer and close to something better for myself, but it's all happening so fats that it makes me feel dizzy at times.

No pain no gain right?! :P


Share This