I recently realized that I am an empath (clairvoyant and claircognizant, the latter more dominant) - I am very very conservative in nature and extremely rational from which to judge.
I recently met a man 8 years my senior on Tinder while going through a challenging divorce (another story of its own.) My intentions were never to get into a relationship but to have sex. We are both single.
In retrospect, I had seen 11:11 everywhere, disregarded the sign. I truly wasn't aware of soulmates let alone twinflames (learned of it this past week, not even searching.)
When I heard his voice for the first time, I felt the immediate gravitation toward him. He experienced the same. There have been more signs (or coincidents) such as: my house number is his birthdate (which had him think a lot) and my new work place building bears his name (he does not know). All is very strange, I am still freaked out. When I met him for the first time, I felt like coming home, not just familiar. I cannot describe it in words. It's this sensation in my abs/ tummy, not just butterflies, but a strong gravitational pull. As soon as I sat down at the table during the first date, he immediately reached for my hands and we held hands all day that day. I felt a strong flow of energy exchange through our hands.
However, our dynamic for the first three months has always been hot and cold. He would tell me he feel the energetic attraction from me (never said between us), that we have tantric like attraction, blah blah... But continued to run way and came back. When asked if he was an empath, he admitted. He's a clairsentient. During the time we saw each other, we could not have sex right away. Every time we attempted, something would happen. For that reason, we only had sex the last 3 weeks of the "relationship". Well it ended abruptly. We had dated for only 3 months during which time he confessed multiple times that my "weirdness was growing on him." for the record, I am not weird by any means. Normal people often mistaken me for a typical millennial. I could sense his anxiety and insecurity like noone else. I could feel his presence when we are not together. I could/ still can smell his scent even though we have not seen each other 1 whole month today. When we were "together", I could smell him yards away. He often confessed the energy flowing between us was intense. He was the only that brought me back to this spiritual life after I had tried to deny it for the last 15 years. He told me that he thought I was a "basic bitch" at first, but I was not and never will be but he didn't want to talk about it...(wtf?????)
He broke up with me to start seeing someone. Having strong personality and dignity, I let him go (cut off cold turkey). Despite the pain of a broken heart, I feel a strange sensation of calmness. I have never felt this in my life post break up. The calm isn't pre storm calmness, it is the zen as if my soul knows all will be fine. He'd been calling to talk but I cut him off completely. I encouraged him to be on his own to think about what he really wanted because I would not accept a man blowing hot and cold. I don't hate him or wish him any malice. I didn't even care whom he was seeing, not even a least bit curious (strange.)
For the record, we are both highly educated and both have steady career paths. He's a psychiatrist and I have been doing well in the corporate environment.
The last time we saw each other, my heart broke as I received the knowing that he was going to break up with me. I tried so hard to not tell him what knowing I received. But being a clairsentient, he felt my heart breaking and he was concerned. It was so dramatic. I had to persuade him that everything was fine even though my heart was bleeding and he felt the pain and described itaccurately as I felt that he wanted to throw up. I guess he didnt know he was gonna break up with me then.
2017 was a terrible year for me. First my husband divorced me and tried to leave me penniless (even though I am the breadwinner). The very same year (months later) I met this man, whom I felt like home. And then only for him to leave me in 2018 for someone else? I want to feel that it is over and I already let go. But why do I feel so calm?
I am rambling now... I am freaked out by all of this. Someone please help guide me.
Im sorry. How do you mean?