So...My Dog Is Dying... :'''''(
And I just can't get over it, we got him when he was 1 back in 2001. His name is George and his birthday is April 1st, same day as my Aunt Kathy. He is 13 right now and he is a MiniatureSchnauzer. I used to be scared of him when I was younger because when my little sister was being baptized the priest's dog barked at me. I keep trying not to cry but I keep failing miserably. My mother said she I going to have him put to sleep on Tuesday the 24th (it is going to take me forever to type this because every other sentence I have to stop and rub the tears off my face and out of my eyes). He's sick and old, my mom doesn't want him to suffer anymore. Two months ago he was sick, he was sick with the same thing he has now. Both an ear infection and a bacteria spread neurological disease, we had to carry him out the door just so he could go to the bathroom, he was vomiting and shaking. They thought he wasn't going to recover last time, my mom said to me he might die then. I cried then and I am crying now.
Having George die is like watching a brother slip away. The vet was surprised at how empathetic we were to our dog, and how caring we were. Though what tears me up the most is that I can't be with him in his final moments because I am away at college, and my mother explained that we got George a Christmas ornament this year is because they didn't know how much longer George would last. It kills me to say that I am never going to see my dog again, seeing him sick is already painful. Writing this is so difficult because writing means that I am trying to come to terms with what is going on in my life right now and when it something sad I just...I just want to run away from what is causing the pain. I can't do that because to me running away from the fact that my childhood friend is dying means I am a coward.
I hate cowards, and I refuse to be one. I am not a little girl and I really don't want to cry at everything going on, I have to get my emotions under control. I hate not having them under control...and I hate that my George-y Porge-y pudding and pie is leaving forever. ("George-y Porge-y pudding and pie, licked the girls and made them cry" is what I said when he was sick, the vet called him Mister George because that is what my sister called him.) When my sister were saying our good-byes to him, we petted him and took pictures (I requested a video just because I am a video person), he didn't even acknowledge us or know we were there. My sister made me cry by what she told him. She told him that he will feel better and that he won't hurt anymore. I called him George-y Porge-y one last time and kissed his head, my sister and I cried loading up the car and leaving to go back to college. I miss him and just want him to be healthy again, not dying or anything.
My best friend understands what this is like and we hugged multiple times when I saw her this weekend. Her step-mother died of breast cancer when she was a little girl, and she loved her step-mother. Now every mother's day she goes to the cemetery to see her stepmother, I would love to the same to my puppy for his birthday. I don't know if George will be buried but I want something for him, because besides from some fish he was our first pet and even though I was afraid of him at first I grew to love him. I love him now and I am going to miss him so much :'(.