By Gigi Miner, 2016-09-18
It's been almost a year since my last post. Life has changed dramatically...tho' there're still challenges.
The abuser is out of the house, tho' he expends a great deal of energy to make sure I am harassed by neighbors and watched by his flying monkeys. That sounds paranoid - I only wish it were.
Still...I am free...mostly. And I'm doing my best to heal. A lifetime of abuse is now being faced head on. Most days I'm okay. Most days I do pretty well. Some days, not so much. Isolation is a big aspect with the kind of abuse I've lived. So, establishing my clan, my tribe, is my current goal...along with the constant healing process. I know it's a life-long process. I can deal. But it would be nice not to have to deal alone any more.
I am opening up to my calling. I am letting spirit bring to me what I need and the lessons I need to learn. The fear of that is almost non-existent. Oh, there are days...but mostly at least, this path is like a comfortable blanket - especially when compared to what I had lived.
So...as the days go by, I'm embracing my life in the moment as best I can. I am trying to find ways to serve and touch others' lives in some helpful way. And, I'm healing. It's a different journey for an empath. But I'd say it makes it far more interesting. :)
By Gigi Miner, 2015-10-05
I've been absent from so much in my life. This because I'm trying to break free from an abusive relationship - oh, it's not physically abusive. For some reason, folks don't accept it if there's no bruises to show - but my soul is damaged and thus, I'm working to heal.
Being an empath means that some of the wounds are very deep. I am still grateful tho'. I know that all these painful lessons will only bring me to a better place - better able to help others. But it's a rough journey.
The abuser is still here - he knows I want him to leave. He said he would, but living like a prisoner in my own home (and yes, even tho' I have been for the last 18 years anyway) is nerve wracking.
This too shall pass. Tho' I'd appreciate any positive energies that might help him move out more quickly. I'm in constant fight or flight mode and that's exhausting.
By Gigi Miner, 2012-08-26
I'm currently trying to follow the "signs". I've used logic for most of my life to make choices and decisions. Now, as an experiment and really as an opening to a deeper spiritual walk, I'm trying to listen, see, etc.
It can be challenging, especially as an empath where we feel so much that's not necessarily ours. I could use some good (very gentle) vibes my way to help me stay in tune and not get dragged about by the various tides of humanity.
I don't usually ask for help. Probably another thing that has to change. But very few understand this walk other than those who live it. Since I don't know any other empaths IRL, there's no one to talk to, to bounce ideas off of, just to understand.
As an HSP as well...well, let's just say it's like being the skinless man sometimes. But I am glad to be finding my way and being what I am. It's like a new adventure in so many ways. There's a great leap of joy when you see the signpost and it leads you in a good direction. Then you can pat yourself on the back for being in tune at that moment.
The distractions are many. But the rewards seems well worth the efforts.
By Gigi Miner, 2012-05-25
I actually wrote a small book-let about being an empath, my path, the walk of being an HSP etc. Three people have had the book. One said it was "well done" but didn't make any sense. Okaaaaaayyyyy.
I think it might be possible that I was wandering around in my own mind, down my own path and it's just too specific to me to make any sense to anyone else. Obvsiously, it makes sense to me 'cause I wrote it. HA!
With so much going on in my life, I may be off my proverbial rocker a bit. Too overwhelmed by this world and the stuff I need to do to survive to be well in touch with my spiritual self. That sucks.
Currently in the process of some financial and life-changing events. Now add what I'm sure is a type of awakening, that seems to be happening all over the place for spiritual folks, and that lost feeling is all too strong. But then, that's sort of what I wrote about. Go figure.
By Gigi Miner, 2012-03-03
Easier said than done many days. My only "rule" is to harm none - at least as far as I am able. This means that I will not pursue something I want or need if it hurts or otherwise brings discomfort to another, to the best of my ability. Now, I could get all noble about it and think of myself as some higher lifeform, but alas, there is a very selfish reason when all is said and done. If I cause harm to another, I feel it. I get to live with the pain and the hurt as well.
I believe in the "live and let live" creedo, but only so far as one person's living does not impinge on the life of another. This is far more complicated than most might think. As empaths, I think we feel these connections more readily than most. So, teaching others about respecting boundaries is, at least to me, part of the path.
I've interacted with many in the spiritual community.What I run across, more often than I'd have considered possible, is that many well-meaning individuals will pray, meditate, send energies, [insert your terminology here] without permission of the receiving person.- to force your energies on another without their express permission is neigh unto spiritual rape.
It is not up to us to determine if they need our energies. It is up to them. Each person gets to say "yes" or "no" and the light workers are not given the right to override an individual's right to choose.
To violate the individual without permission is to cause harm, regardless of one's intent. I think many an empath has suffered from this sort of violation (often without realizing it), which should make us all the more understanding about such things.
I know, it's a hornet's nest just waiting to be poked. But if we're going to walk this path, we need to be careful where we step.
By Gigi Miner, 2012-02-02
I took the quiz before joining this group:
You are a Universal Empath, you possess all the qualities of the other seven empath groups. You are what is known as an "Implicate" or Imp, a product of evolutionary design and genetic mutation. You are a psychic hybrid. (from "The Book of Storms" by Jad Alexander at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Empaths/) ... Universal 95% Fallen Angel 90% Traveler 90% Precog 80% Judge 80% Healer 75% Shaman 70% Artist 65%
Still don't know "what" I am beyond that. Abusive early years smothered the natural development. Survival dictates that you can't follow your instincts if your survival is attached to the abuse. So, late start on learning all this and actually seeing what I am.
Have had several people tell me they knew what I was before I did. How's that for self awareness? :D
I've helped others find their path. Maybe I'm just a roadsign. I could be like the scarecrow changing which way I'm pointing depending on how I'm feeling. Ha!