Hi Blink, I'm a newbie and don't know much, but I think you should go to the funeral. If I were in your shoes, I'd go to the doctor and get some Xanax, show up to the funeral, and make a hasty exit if you need to. Say that you're not feeling well (and I'm sure that will be true).
Forum Activity for @visitor
Anybody had a pet reincarnated? Sorry if this is duplicated....
Anybody had any experience with animal reincarnation? I ask because my rescue dog died suddenly yesterday, with no serious illness. I consulted an empath/healer/medium who told me she checked out early because of past trauma that she couldn't overcome, and physical weakness and a general "blah" feeling about life. She told me that the dog wants to come back to me very soon, in the form of a health puppy so that she can live a full, happy life with me. I've doted on her and pampered her since I got her, and it made quite a change in her mood (until recently). Has anybody ever experience the reincarnation of a pet? I have not. Most of my dogs have lived to ripe old ages and died of cancer and other natural causes. Please let me know your thoughts.
updated by @visitor: 02/24/17 04:31:03AM
Reincarnated pet? Has anyone ever had this happen?
My dog died very suddenly yesterday. She wasn't sick, just depressed. I was absolutely crushed, and consulted an empathic healer/medium. She said the dog had been abused and neglected before I adopted it (which I knew) and she was feeling unwell and tired of life. So she just checked out - just like that. I had an autopsy done, so I know there wasn't any underlying mystery disease.
Here's the deal: The healer said the dog adores me and wants to come back to me in the form of a healthy puppy, so she can have a long life with me and be a normal dog. It's a lovely thing to hear, but have any of you actually had this happen to you? Where you lost a pet (dog, cat, horse) and it came back? And you knew it was the same soul? I've heard of one such case with animals, a few cases with people.
Please don't tell me you don't believe in it. I'm just looking for testimonials from people who've had it happen to them, or someone they know. Thanks.
updated by @visitor: 09/04/18 07:28:24PM
Anybody ever sense an approaching death?
Well, I got my answer. My dog died today, very suddenly, at age 6. I loved her so much it hurt. I got her from a neighbor who was very neglectful of her. I gave her a good and happy life for 6, 7 months and then suddenly she went downhill and died this morning, right in my bed with her head on my pillow. The vet is going to autopsy her to see what caused it. She might have had something wrong for a very long time.
I talked to a spiritual healer this morning and she said the dog wanted to go, was so traumatized and weak and ill that she need to check out, despite all my devotion to her, but she wants to come back to me in the form of a puppy. Oh, gee I hope so. She deserves a good puppyhood.
I know what you're talking about, but I meet a LOT of people who show empathic traits. Sometimes I'll mention it and they'll know exactly what I'm saying. Just today my chiropractor said "I always feel your shoulder pain when I come into the room." I said he sounded empathic, and he said yes, it's hard to deal with sometimes. I told him about my own experience, and he just said Whoa, you have to be careful with that. Like we were talking about ice on the roads.
It's getting more and more normal to talk about things like this. Unfortunately, my family isn't among the people I can talk to about it. They think I'm a freak. Or that I have a personality disorder. But there's a whole "underground" of us. It feels great to connect with you all.
A few things I know about empaths (and that's not very much):
1. We can be attracted to negative people because we want to "fix" them.
2. We can be pretty negative ourselves, if we haven't dealt with things the right way. (Guilty. Sometimes.)
3. There are both evil and good empaths. Being empathic doesn't make a person automatically a nice person. I dated an empathic man who used me like a roll of toilet paper. Yes, I tried to fix him. He tried to fix me. I had to separate myself from him completely so I could go on healing. He continued to look for empathic women, found a lot of them, abused them, and ended up alone and in unspeakably bad shape.
4. We can change our habits - it just takes a lot of time!
Can't walk away
By spiritual guide, I mean a human being who has studied the healing arts and can help you in a hands-on way. There are a lot of them around. Even where I live, a small rural community, I've found a few invaluable people. And you can contact Elise on this website. She's been very helpful to me.
I also worked with a shaman who removed two "entities" from me. She had to chase one of them away twice. One was trying to destroy me, and it turned out to be a male entity who greatly resembled my ex-boyfriend and my mother at the same time! It takes a lot of work to do this, and you can't do it alone. And unfortunately, there's usually some sort of cost involved. But it's worth it. And you are SO not alone in this experience.
I'm a Christian, although I was raised agnostic, and I have never stopped believing in God. But lately I've been very angry with him and questioning him, like "What are you thinking? How could you let this happen?"
It sounds like life kicked you hard and no wonder you're angry and hurt. That doesn't mean God doesn't exist, but if you're angry at him, I can certainly understand why. I think it's very normal to question God and faith and religion. I think it's part of the healing process.
I'm a brand-newbie so I'm just beginning to understand this. I've met empaths who feel other people's physical pain in their bodies. I don't experience that; I just internalize emotions and I'm having a horrible time trying to sort that out. I don't read people's thoughts unless they're SO obvious that it's like they have a thought bubble over their heads! I think there must be a whole spectrum of empaths, and you're on it somewhere. You say you don't cry unless you're drunk. That's a big clue to me that you're very blocked - probably you're blocking some pretty overwhelming feelings that you don't know how to manage. I remember crying a lot as a child, for normal reasons like getting hurt or scared, and then all of a sudden I stopped crying and hardly ever do it anymore. I sensed that my mother got "turned on" when I cried, like her maternal instincts went WAY out of whack, and that terrified and disgusted me. So yes, I've been desensitized, but only on the outside. On the inside I'm a mess.
You sound like a starseed. I just googled it after reading your post, and I don't believe I'm a star person, but you certainly sound like one. You can be an empath and a starseed both. There are plenty of people who feel like you do - you should get busy and try to connect with them!
Note: I chose my user name "Visitor" because that's what I feel like - a visitor to this planet. I find Earth very rough and violent and far too fast-paced for my comfort. But I'm not interested in space or UFOs or ancient pyramids or anything like that. I feel like I've lived on Earth several times before, at least one lifetime as a Spanish speaker, and at least once as a Native American. I don't really know where I originally came from.
Hi, I recently did a 15-minute session with Elise (from this website) and it was enormously helpful. She suggested I was paying too much attention to the news and it was exhausting me. It's true - I spend far too much time and energy worrying about world events. I am tuning out the media (except for fun stuff) and it's helping. I'm a newbie myself and I tend to take on too much baggage.
I kind of just found out. It's mostly been negative. I pick up all kinds of bad energy from around me and I think it's my own thoughts. I've always been a "hider" to escape these feelings. But I pick up negative energy from the internet too. I rarely pick up positive energy! I'm still working on this, obviously.
Martha, I'm a lapsed Catholic but still consider myself a Christian and a Catholic (with an open mind). When I went to Mass on a regular basis I usually picked up good energy. At one point, I think the biggest doubter was the priest! I don't think I'm as sensitive as you. I'm a newbie anyway.
As somebody once said, a church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints. So yes, you will find all kinds of people in a church. As far as shielding yourself from bad energy, I don't know how to do that myself yet.
If you choose not to go to church regularly, I don't think that's sinful. It says to "honor the Sabbath day and keep it holy", but I don't interpret that as meaning physically going to church. If it's draining you, that's not good. I guess what I'm saying is you shouldn't feel guilty, whatever your decision. But I don't think Jesus wants you to spend every Sunday feeling drained and exhausted.
I feel guilty because I'm miserable...
Anybody else feel this way? I'm job-hunting and finding it depressing. I feel like in order to get a job ("attract" a job) I should be happy, smiling, positive, etc. and I feel the opposite. I hear voices in my head from my whole entire life telling me to smile, to look at the bright side, bla bla bla. Verbally kicking me for being a "downer". Then I get angry at those voices; they did more harm than good. How do I get out of this downward spiral?
updated by @visitor: 07/23/18 12:49:45PM
I don't know. I was shocked to hear about David Bowie, but I don't feel that pseudo-closeness to rock stars that I did when I was a teenager. He died of natural causes, surrounded by family. I tend to get a lot more upset by sudden death, murder, suicide, etc.
I feel like I'm absorbing the sadness of the whole entire world, but I think it has to do with the awful state the world is in right now. So much sadness and loss, and the new year brings it all into stark focus. "Happy new year" is anything but.
Holy cow, you've got a whopping case! I'm a newbie empath too, and I'm finding Elise's exercises (on this website) helpful. I would recommend reading "Self-Care for the Self-Aware" by Dave Markowitz. And find yourself a psychic healer or a shaman, someone who "gets" empaths. As a newbie, I wish I could give you more advice, but that's a start.
Welcome, Kate. I'm a newbie too and find it overwhelming. I've had good luck with intuitive (psychic) healers, shamans, and by using forums like this one. I'm starting to realize that I'm not "that negative person" but just taking on everybody else's bad energy. I find it hard to pick up good energy, though! I have very little money but it's well worth it to spend it on a session with a healer. I'd rather feel good than have a new pair of shoes, anyway.
I would recommend the book "Self-Care for the Self-Aware" by Dave Markowitz. It has some great exercises for empaths. You can find it in pdf form online if you google it, but it's also not very expensive - just a tiny little paperback book.
You reminded me of my poor sister. She's not really empathic. One day I was talking to her and noticed that she absorbed my negative energy and started to sag; I absorbed her positive energy and started feeling great! I can't help it; I'm just intense. Sometimes it's easier to be around people who want to connect with you in a shallow but friendly manner. (Isn't this weather awful? How about those Broncos.)
I've also found that I need to stay away from Facebook. I spend too much time there and absorb all feelings right through the computer. It's better to sit on the couch with my dog and do nothing than to "keep busy" doing something that sucks out my energy. We're all trained to stay busy in this culture.
Empaths & Hoarders - is there a connection?
Ecila - My parents are hoarders too. My father is a clean and neat hoarder - everything is labeled. My mother is dirty and messy. She hates to throw anything away, even garbage. They're getting old and I tried to live with them and help out, but it didn't work. I helped her clear out one corner of the kitchen. It took a few hours, was very exhausting, but I felt like we'd gotten somewhere. Then the next day it was all cluttered again with different stuff. I gave up!
People have to get rid of their own clutter; it's a personal process. Your mother meant well but she shouldn't have done that. The only time to intervene is when it poses a fire hazard. And I knew a woman who died because the paramedics couldn't reach her.
Empaths & Hoarders - is there a connection?
I'm a recovering semi-hoarder. My house doesn't look nearly as bad as those in the TV shows, but I've got all the symptoms.
I've been cleaning out, one drawer or box at a time, and I've noticed that it's horrendously emotional, especially the drawer I'm cleaning out now, which is full of old letters, cards, and other correspondence. I've been deeply depressed, not like cleaning out a sock drawer and throwing away the singles.
Then I started to wonder if there's a connection between empathy and hoarding. Hoarders attach emotions to objects, anthropomorphize them, can't let them go. That's how it's described. But we know that objects do carry emotion - other people's emotion.
Is anybody here a hoarder, recovering hoarder, semi-hoarder? I'd like to talk to you.
updated by @visitor: 09/01/18 11:27:17AM
I have voices in my head too but if they start acting nasty, the more benevolent voices shout them down. I've created a whole community of voices that boosts my confidence, and scolds me only when I really need a kick in the butt. But I suspect that as a writer, I make these voices up and they become real. Whatever works.
A lot of people internalize voices from their childhood. If you had abusive parents, you will no doubt hear their words echoing in your head unless you do some serious healing (like I had to).
No one likes me at my job
I can't see it from where you're sitting, but I'll throw out a few suggestions. The end of the holidays are almost always stressful and depressing for everybody. You could try to "lie low" and pretend it's none of your business (it is your business, but you could try to stay out) until things settle down a little. Or you could look for another job. I had a really good job once that I excelled in, but people treated me so badly I started getting suicidal ideations. That's when I knew it was time to resign. Or find out if you can collect disability payments for your diabetes. I'm unemployed right now and it's pretty darn depressing too. Good luck with everything!
I think it depends on your level of enlightenment. I'm just learning about this, so I have to avoid medical offices and hospitals. I can't work with sad, angry, scared, dying people around me every day because I pick up their feelings. And then I get fired. It's miserable.
I think sales is a good place to be, or retail, at least for a newbie like me. I used to place ads for people and help them get the cost way down. They liked that, but my supervisor didn't. But people like it when you really tune into them and find out what they really need, and help them get it, and at a price they like. Soft sell is the way to go, in my opinion.
For a truly enlightened empath, I think doing healing work is the best thing you can do. I'm not nearly there yet.
Can't walk away
You are a good person - very good-hearted. But you need to walk away from your father.
It took having a life-threatening illness for me to realize I had to cut certain people out of my life, some of them family, some of them so-called friends. It was easy to do once I realized I'd almost died. When you're lying in a hospital bed with nobody to talk to, you get mad. You start reassessing your life.
You can't do this alone, however. Find a spiritual guide who can help you out of this. I'm just a newbie myself, but that's what I do when I can't figure something out by myself.
Anybody ever sense an approaching death?
Thank you for all your replies. I think I may be just depressed and unemployed. I don't think I'm clairvoyant, just empathic. I'm picking up a lot of negative energy, I think from people recovering from the holidays and all the fights and disappointment.
Yes! I was hijacked as an empath and BY an empath. He was older than I was and knew how to press every button. I was ready to leave him a few months into the relationship, but he got me to stay and take care of him by threatening suicide. We even remained friends long after we'd broken up as a couple. He was a gifted psychic but very damaged and needy. He manipulated women (I was just one of many) to stay with him and take care of him. He was always losing jobs and ended up on disability finally. He was self-destructive. He constantly insulted me and said it was for my own good. I've said enough about him; you get the picture.
Ironically, it was the therapist he referred me to who helped me break away from him. Do what you need to do to heal yourself, and do what YOU want to do. You're not always a social butterfly? Neither am I, and there is NOTHING wrong with that. Are you a Type B instead of a workaholic? Good!!! The world needs a balance of different types of people.
Try not to let her draw you back in. If you have chiildren, then that can't be helped, but if you don't have any kids, sever ALL ties with her, and I speak from harsh experience. I wish you all the best!
Many of us are newbies and don't know what we're doing. We're desperate for advice. And there is no positive without negative. I need to look hard at the negative, to determine where it's coming from - me or someone else? How do I dissipate it, block it, whatever? I come here to learn and help, not to be smiley and positive all the time, because I'm not.
I don't agree that all sociopaths have broken hearts. I think some people are born that way.
I have seen people with elongated pupils, and did some research to find out what causes it. From Wikipedia:
"Tadpole pupil, also known as episodic segmental iris mydriasis, is an ocular condition where the muscles of the iris begin to spasm causing the elongation, or lengthening, of parts of the iris."
It's apparently an involuntary spasm. I think it's just another weird condition that people are born with sometimes. But something atavistic inside of us is terrified of snakes and reptiles. I doubt that there's anything wrong with this lady.
I Want Everyone's Intuition On This
My intuition (and experience) tell me that he won't change, except temporarily. He sounds like a classic abuser, and I know something about people in that category.
Chronic abusers never take blame for anything, or responsibility for their own problems. Their outbursts seem to be cyclical. Nice guy for a few weeks, then three months later he's built up so much rage that he starts taking it out on everyone in sight. Even if he doesn't hit, emotional violence can cause physical reactions, like ulcers, headaches, foggy thinking, depression, anxiety, etc. Whatever the cause is (it could be emotional or chemical), you and your family cannot grow and thrive in an atmosphere like that!!!!!!
If I were you I would leave. It won't be easy, but you can start to heal and move onward.
Misreading or misunderstanding what I write or say
I don't think people read carefully these days. If you write a paragraph, they're likely to see "I'm married with two kids andblalblablalbblablalbalbalbalbalblablalbalbalblalalalalbalalbalbalblalbawhenever it rains." Their own thoughts get in the way, the stress of the day, whatever. I'd like to see people slow down and pay attention to every word, myself. It gets annoying.
I preface a lot of comments with "I'm no expert, but I suspect that bla bla bla" and people accuse me of being a know-it-all, even though I didn't claim to know anything! They don't read the preface.
I find it help to use bullet points or numbers to list my thoughts. They're easier to read that way.
Yes! Absolutely. I don't always notice it. My sister is a wonderful cook and loves cooking, so her meals are always delicious and leave a good feeling. But I have noticed that once in a while, my mood will change suddenly after I've eaten. If you've ever seen "Like Water for Chocolate", it addresses that very phenomenon.
I don't like cooking, and I've noticed that my cooking tastes boring and disappointing, no matter what kind of ingredients I use.
Are you recovering from Christmas? I think a lot of us are. I spent the day with family, and although there weren't any major scenes, I left feeling like I'd been eviscerated. I have been feeling negative and depressed since then. At least I know I'm empathic, and probably picking up lot of feelings from them. So I'm not taking it very personally. They have some serious problems to deal with like all families, and fortunately it has little or nothing to do with me. I made an appt with an intuitive healer next week; she works with negative energy, drains it out of you, replaces it with healing energy, and she's worth her weight in gold. Today I'm too depressed even to take the dog out, or do chores, or anything but read, but I know that it's Christmas Season Empath Meltdown.
Here's my take on clutter: I'm an empath, always have been, and I used to be organized and neat. I started becoming a semi-hoarder after 9-11. Then I started watching hoarder shows. It seems that hoarders typically have a trauma that triggers their hoarding. My mother, for instance, lost her mother suddenly and I think that's what triggered her problem. Sometimes it's death, sometimes it's divorce, but I don't think all empaths are doomed to attract clutter, unless they're dealing with a tragic loss.
I do think that hoarders and empaths have one thing in common - they attach sentimental value to objects. Fortunately I'm overcoming my clutter problem, but I am a neatnik underneath and have no desire to go out and gather more stuff. I attach sentimental value to my pets, not my things.
I also believe that most people are empaths to one degree or the other. The ones who made it to this forum are the unusually sensitive ones.
Anybody have a morbid fascination with celebrities? Anybody find them horribly depressing?
I know what you mean, but I'm getting the feeling that these people are leading miserable, false lives and I'm sensing it even though they're not writing about it.
Anybody have a morbid fascination with celebrities? Anybody find them horribly depressing?
I try to put myself on a "celebrity fast" and stay away from articles about "stars". But when I read the articles I feel dirty, ashamed, depressed, like I'm picking something up from their lives. Anybody else have the same feeling?
updated by @visitor: 01/15/17 08:38:52AM