lol Didn't mean to offend. But like someone earlier said, this is the case for many people all over. People are suffering and many are yearning for something that they can't quite figure out. There's a deep hunger in many people and there are quite a few depressed individuals out there. I first took note when I was 12 but it's all around us sad to say. Few people are actually living from their heart and doing the things that could restore faith in themselves and in humanity.
Forum Activity for @crownite
Uhhh No. Not necessarily. Maybe that idea just doesn't jive with yours and everyone is entitled to their own opinion and explanation of the world. But I've found some athiests to be far more spiritual and aware than others, even christians. I think many Atheists LEAVE Christianity and other religions and become atheists due to the disillusionment they experience with religion and religious institutions and its inability to explain much of life's stories. There's also spiritual atheists, people who don't believe in God but who believe there is something else. I even think some very religious people can be bleak and hopeless too, not leaving any room for growth. So..nah. I can find some peace with even them.
I think I have mostly "good luck". Everything just seems to work out for the better, even if it isn't always consciously what I had in mind. As of a result of this, I let go of the need to control everything in my life and to just "go with the flow". It helps me to stay present, and I'm learning to deal with situations as they arise as opposed to worrying about it since worry solves nothing.
Yes, the law of polarity. Everything exists on a continuum and you can vary on that continuum depending on what you focus on.I wouldn't call empathy a super power. I think it's a kind of natural inner awareness and understanding of our own connection and likeness to all things. As that awareness increases, so does our ability to identify. But, I think many empaths, like many others, haven't learned that they have a choice in how they relate to others and who they allow to affect them and their actions, etc.
In Control in the Present?
I've been bringing awareness back into my body and into the present moment. I had a talk with my wiser self about this as well because in the present is when I have the most and strongest panic-like symptoms. The message was that until I learned to accept the unexpected as normal, I'll continue to have panic attacks. Being in the present moment, I tend to have "panic like attacks" because I feel like anything can happen and nothing is in my control. My awareness of the world is far bigger. In the present, I pick up on energy much more easily.
Question: being in the present, do you feel like nothing is really in your control? Control is an illusion, butdo you notice how much bigger the world is or is your awareness broader?
updated by @crownite: 01/20/17 12:50:59AM
Embracing Spiritual Gifts
I keep being told that my 3rd eye is blocked because of fear. I had a reading done on it that mentions that it has to do with 2 distinct past life experiences, one where I was too afraid to "see" and another where I was punished for "seeing". Now, I remember that at some point in my development in this life, I did shutdown my gifts and turn my life over to servitude and the mercy of the elements. I convinced myself that God's love had to be earned. However, my time as a travel nurse taught me that struggle is not necessary for growth and that changed the view I had of the Divine and of my life.As a result, I made a promise to myself that I would trust myself implicitly. But my gifts never fully returned.
I think this has to do with the other part of my past life experience. The part where I was too afraid to "see". In this life, while in college I started "seeing", "hearing", communicating with angels, "leaving" my body as well has having all my other intuitive abilities heightened. But this terrified me. I was afraid of what it could mean and I was afraid of changing too drastically to the point of becoming almost unrecognizable to others I knew as well as to myself. I was afraid that if I continued down this road and welcomed these gifts that I wouldn't be able to continue down the path I had wanted for myself. It was a control thing. And I essentially tried to kill a part of myself. But now I want it back or I feel like I do. But the fear is still there on some level of what it could mean or would mean to accept it and welcome these gifts back into my life.
The fear I carry in this life is the block. Not of being punished, but of how much I could change by having these gifts be a natural and welcomed part of my life. But I want to be whole.I have a family member who has similar gifts of sight and I've been encouraging her to embrace herself, to not do what I did by shutting down and essentially trying to kill myself on some level but I'm being a hypocrite.
I want my gifts back. I want to reignite that fire in myself. But how?
updated by @crownite: 07/23/18 03:05:41AM
I got over social media years ago. I use to feel like I was on a constant emotional rollercoaster ride and I hated it. Too much information comes rushing in to me on my newsfeed and it exhausts me within 2-5 minutes. So now I'm not on it (except for this site, city-data on occasion and a nurse's forum which I seldom frequent) and if anyone has something to tell me, they can come find me and we can sit one on one and discuss it. Otherwise, it's too much.
Also, I value my privacy a great deal. I don't want the world to know everything that's going on in my life. I work in healthcare, in the hospital and so everyday I encounter a lot of varying energies (usually heavy) and so it's not often that I can choose what comes in and out of my life. I work with babies which is a great energy to work with! But their parents and families as well as my coworkers (who right now can be a bit much) can be a mixed bag. When I come home, I need to tune out and decompress, not tune into other people's stuff. I won't allow that. I need boundaries and respect my space as well as everyone else's.
Yes, I have. Loneliness and I are very well acquainted. Very well acquainted...
Short answer: Yes. Finding kindred spirits to connect is something that I experience less frequently than most I feel. I live in the U.S but have experiences living elsewhere and it seems like people here are big on having lots of friends, etc. Very extroverted society. It ebbs and flows and sometimes it's a matter of putting things into perspective.
1. I'm an introvert.
2. According to the Myers Briggs test I'm an INFJ which makes up about 1-2% of the population.
3. Spiritual growth and development can make one introspective and this can result in not having people stick around as much.
I stopped placing the expectation on others to accept me or do stuff with me or be my friend. Instead,I count my blessings. Putting things into perspective: there's people who I haven't wanted to spend time with or who I have grown apart from and maybe that's what happened with them to me as well.
Also, some of the people who discarded me in a seemingly cruel way, I do not envy their lives now and I'm grateful that they are no longer in my life. Personally, I think my life is better with them out of it than if they had stuck around. I wouldn't have grown.
Maybe you're just growing and one day you'll meet people who are like-minded and whom you feel connected to who will stick around. Or maybe you'll adapt to the ebb and flow of your relationships in your life.
Feeling The Present
Daydreaming, for me, is a form of escapism because i'm trying to escape the pain of a present situation. My other option is crying or writing or surfing the web. lol
I've been on this unit for about 3 months now and over time things just continue to be confirmed about the unit. From what I've gathered, it seems like people are mostly unhappy with management, staffing, seniority, issues with younger/newer workers and older/experienced workers. There's also gossip. It's all playing out here on the unit at the same time. I've just decided to keep to myself for the most part. My only thing is that I don't want to go back to my old specialty as I like the general population I care for so I haven't made quitting an immediate option. But it's an option. lol
Feeling The Present
As an empath or claircognizant, how do you allow yourself to remain in the present even in difficult situations/environments?
I ask this because I currently work on a unit where I feel like everything is not as it seems. People aren't happy. They gossip about each other, there's a lot of issues going on between the older and the younger generation of staff, they have issues with management, people can be passive aggressive. It's just a lot of stuff going on that makes me feel uncomfortable and it's all unfolding and being confirmed as time goes on.
This makes remaining in the present difficult for me because I don't enjoy being in an environment like that. Often times, I find myself daydreaming or trying to escape the present in that situation.
So how do you guys stay present in said situations?
updated by @crownite: 01/20/17 12:50:45AM
I've had this craving with relying on outside sources when I younger. Not drugs and alcohol, but internet use, forums, chatrooms, etc. I felt it was necessary for my growth at the time and I was addicted to it. So yes, I have felt like my true self wanted me to figure out things with the help of other things. I had something to learn about those things. But I don't anymore, because that chapter is over. I wouldn't advocate others seek outside for things, especially not drugs and alcohol or social media to have people decide life for you, but...it can be enlightening.
Meeting new people
I can definitely relate to all of what you've described with people.
Envy happens when someone you consider to be on the same page as you suddenly seems to be doing better and that's what happened with your friend. You seem happy and confident when in the past perhaps the both of you were not. Your perception of life being somehow unfair gave her perception of life validation because you were both on the same page.
You other friend who exploded on you, you're right she didn't need to explode on you. But she did it because she doesn't trust herself enough to make her own decisions. She wanted you to tell her what to do and you refused so she snapped because she was scared of losing the person who makes decisions for her and is scared she'll now have to make decisions for herself and what if she's wrong? who's to blame then?
Friends come in time. When you let one go, new ones come along and as you evolve, sometimes so does your circle.
Meeting new people
Yes, it use to happen a lot. I think it has to do with the boundaries we set and the beliefs we carry about what our roles are in the world and in our relationships. If you believe that your role, as a empath, is to "save" people (and you'd have to examine yourself for this idea) then you'll attract people who want to be saved. But a big chunk of it goes back to you and what your beliefs are.
You're not a bad person for saying no to the savior complex.
How many of us are single out of choice
I suppose its by choice for me too. Initially I was very attached to the twin flame concept but what I found was that I was attracting people out of sheer desperation and a lack of understanding of who I am and what I even really wanted out of a relationship if anything at all. When I realized what my draw was to the concept and began to reconnect with myself, my craving for a relationship dwindled and I've found more joy and a greater sense of wholeness and completion in my single status. I'm not opposed to a romantic relationship, but I no longer see it as a necessary part of my growth or a need in order to demonstrate my evolutionary process to others, which I had initially perceived the twin flame concept to be.
Well, finding the right person is difficult for many whether they identify as being 'empath' or 'not; hence, all those dating sites and apps and options.
All I can say is don't base your entire life off of your parent's unhappy marriage. You don't have to be like them. My grandparents had a great marriage but none of their children (with the exception of one) have stable, healthy, happy marriages from what I can see so it's not all about them.
It's also a matter of trial and error. You're gonna make mistakes even with your empath ability so no point in really fearing them. It doesn't actually lessen the blow anyway.
So good luck! Hope romantic love finds you.
Honestly, I'm not as picky as I make myself seem. But finding love in this day and age is difficult.
What is love? Many people don't really know and "love" isn't exactly enough to keep two people together.
We have higher expectations of our partners today. We want someone who understands us, who accepts us as we are, who is smart, funny, sophisticated, good looking. Yeah, I think it's too much to outsource to one person.
Does the word "No" sound like the word "Maybe" when spoken by an Empath
No. Being an empath doesn't quite justify people pleasing tendencies. Even as empaths we have to learn to speak up and advocate for ourselves and learn good, strong communication techniques and clear cut boundaries.
What do you think triggered your empathic abilities?
I've always been conscious of energy (though not really empathic but more claircognizant). What helped give me a word to describe my experience was this woman I had encountered online who described HERSELF as an Empath. Wanting to be like her, I took on the name and started paying more attention to my own natural abilities. But I know now they don't manifest in me the way they manifested in her. I'm my own entity.
I just know stuff.
Because self-doubt and I are well-acquainted, I try not to plant those same seeds in another.
I think what I was saying is that your mother is your mother. You can't change her. But you do need to take care of you and learning to implement (not just saying) the serenity prayer in your life may be to your benefit. She's been this way for a good 80 years. She's functional. But the pain you're experiencing is for you to deal with. You've already moved out. You're not around her to have to deal with her stuff everyday.Maybe counseling so you can learn to recover and develop skills will help you? For the things I went through, I created distance. And tried to interact with other people while doing a lot of self-examination and paying attention to how I felt in different situations. That's how I learned what was true for me and what was part of my conditioning. I'm still learning.
I'm sorry you've gone through this. I hope you find comfort soon.
Not really...I mean we can presume that there's "something wrong" or they're not quite "normal" or that they're not treating us how we want to be treated but it isn't really something we can go about labelling and diagnosing ourselves. Psychology is so full of gray and they might seem to fit the criteria in our heads but they might not necessarily be that way. To make it worse, because we've labeled them, our own energy starts feeling depleted by their presence because we've created a relationship with the disease (or what we think is wrong with that person).
I think if you're in a situation that isn't making you happy, then create some distance. Don't tell them about what's going on in your life, try not to get too involved in theirs, even if you live in the same home. Until you can find a way to move out and be on your own, create as much distance as you can. Don't make the mistake of thinking that you "have to" stay or that you "can't" leave or you "can;t" create some distance. You can!
And then say the serenity prayer and keep it moving.
Is being an empath genetic?
Nature vs. Nurture? I think some people utilize their empathic ability more than others because they haven't had situations that caused them to negate them, bury them under, etc so they've had more opportunities to nurture those talents (whether they were dubbed good experiences or bad). Other people, it served no purpose in their lives and decided to chuck it for other skills like...math. lol
You're not the only person by any means Who has encountered these people so no, you're not alone. I don't like labeling much anymore. But I think part of what I was saying is that I think a good chunk of why some folks continue to stay with and put up with abusive behavior has to do with the abuser providing something they think they can't live without despite the behavior that causes harm. It's a pattern. There's also insecurities, thinking we can "fix" people (well what if they don't want to be fixed and have yet to come to the realization that they are the problem) or that we can't do any better. And many people who abuse others will capitalize on that fear by telling their "victim", "no one else will want you. Where will you go?" Or putting them down so much that they don't think they can go on. Theres also other beliefs (mine was the twin flame concept) not to mention some people set themselves up as another person's savior thinking they are the only ones who can save them because you "understand" them really well because you have these abilities. Well you can't. You can save yourself and they themselves. That's it.
I'm sorry this happened to you. I've have had quite a few people come into my life who haven't treated me right. I have family members who are with abusers as well. Some people don't put up with the behavior and as a result abusers won't try it with them. I have an aunt who the MOMENT she detects a hint of disrespect she nips in the bud immediately. So the family member who is abusive doesn't even consider trying it with her. She won't stand for it. Not everyone does that. Some want to give the benefit of a doubt and it's that very tendency to want to do that despite all evidence of the obvious that makes it easy for people with abusive to enter our lives and take advantage. People who mistreat us are not one-dimensional characters. If they were all bad all the time, it would make it very easy and clear for us to walk away. But they're not.
Honestly? I think some Empaths are VERY heavy and VERY dark and can be incredibly draining and cause more problems than there need to be. I do not have us al on a pedestal. Some empaths, like many others, I want nothing to do with.
updated by @crownite: 12/25/16 07:38:46AM
This is really interesting to me and something in myself that I have been examining for a while now.
Every stage of my life has presented me with a new level of awareness and for that reason I don't think that enlightenment is a "one stop shop". There's no "arriving" because life is constantly in motion so I do think that everyone is undergoing the enlightenment process but different people are at different levels of awareness of it. I also think we all have gifts regardless of how they manifest but I don't think they're necessary to utilize in order to grow unless it's necessary for your life choices. I don't need to be a struggling empath who feels like they can't NOT help everybody and feel everyone's pain. Nor do I need to have psychic ability and use it to help those struggling. That isn't exactly an indication of growth or awareness to me or even past life experience.
Much of what I know about past lives I have been told about from readings I've had. And for those who feel a sense of incompletion, I think it would be great to have another lifetime to experience that closure. But there need not be a reincarnation for me. OBE only demonstrated to me that there are things that go beyond the 5 senses not that reincarnation is possible. It seemed to me during that time that everything was happening NOW. So there was no coming back to complete anything.
updated by @crownite: 12/24/17 05:58:22PM
I don't think this means you're an empath. Anyone can feel a sense of guilt for hurting another person's feelings if they have empathy. But you didn't like how she made you feel. It doesn't make her a "bad" person and you a victim and hurting her feelings doesn't make you a "bad" person and her anything at all.
Maybe she wants you back because she considers you a friend or because she liked you but didn't know how to show it or she just likes having friends. It doesn't have to do with you being an "empath'.
Questions about spiritual connections
No, the other person doesn't always feel it. Part of a spiritual connection could be about the relationship you have with yourself. so for example, you always seem attracted to the same type of people who hurt you. In this case, it isn't even really about that person but about whatever relationship/connection it is you have with that distinct trait.
what makes you happy?
Have you guys ever made a list of what makes you happy or helps you feel a sense of accomplishment/fulfillment?I like travelling and having somewhere to go and having the freedom to choose when I go, how I go, as well as who I go with makes me incredibly happy and helps me feel a great sense of fullness.What about you guys?
updated by @crownite: 09/03/18 05:00:43PM
Psychic and Paranormal
Anyone here claircognizant?
I come from a Christian background and for a long time my family would say I had the gift of "discernment". I'm a little more claircognizant than clairsentient and I sometimes I get mental pictures in my head of a situation and I find it easy to interpret it due to my natural knowing of what it means. I think for a long time this is what contributed to my self-doubt. If it's just a thought or a flash of insight as opposed to a strong gut feeling or a vibration in my rib cage or heart area (which is often what people talk about and what I seldom get), it was easier for me to shake it off as being "all in my head" until it proved true. The joke I always give to my family is, "A prophet has no honor in her own home." lol
For a long time I associated being "psychic" with being clairvoyant only. And so I didn't really take time to appreciate the gifts I did have; thus, making it even harder to trust myself. I think if you're claircognizant then it's a little bit harder to learn to trust the information you do get because you're not getting information in the form of dreams, visions, vibrations, sights, sounds, smells, etc. You just kind of "know" and there's no real warning you just get it. In high school, I use to be a counselor for a lot of people because I just knew things about situations that I hadn't even personally been through let alone felt a connection to. I just knew stuff. But I often found that it was hard to get insight into my own life situations, particularly with the opposite sex, because I couldn't seem to trust myself enough to make the right decision for me.
What I've learned is that writing helps. If something is preoccupying my mind or if I feel something stirring inside of me, I grab my computer or a pen and paper and start writing. It's funny because I've always done this, even as a little kid but I didn't understand what I was doing at the time. I just knew I had to jot whatever was coming to me down because I felt inspired. If I need confirmation on something that has nothing to do with anything going on in my current situation, or I find myself asking. "why am I curious about this?", I google it. Above all, I think the biggest thing for me was gaining enough experience to learn to trust the information that was coming to me and how it came to me. And really, it's quite natural and often so simple and subtle that we miss it, especially if it doesn't feel like, "overwhelm" and is happening on a daily basis it's really easy to take it for granted. The information I get feels like inspiration, a realization, or like a flash of insight. Sometimes I get a quick flash picture and I can tell an entire story from it and I know exactly what's going on. Bing,bam, boom! It can be very quick and very easy to miss if you're looking for something other than what you already have (like I was).
For those of you who think you are claircognizant, try writing or talking to yourself out loud. I think the more you do it the easier it becomes to discern your own thoughts with the information that's coming from a higher and somewhat clearer place and eventually it'll be easier to remain aligned with and connected to that knowledge. If you're like me and you are both claircognizant and clairsentient, then start by taking some time to yourself so you can sift through your emotions vs others' (change your scenery, do something new, mix it up a bit) and combine that with your writing and self-conversations. Doing that helps to reduce the amount of confusion you feel and like a friend of mine said, "eventually everything just lines up." And you're going to need your confidence. Developing this gift requires that you trust yourself completely because the information you receive requires faith. But you'll be a stronger person for it.
updated by @crownite: 09/06/18 12:15:55AM
I think you two just don't connect well. I have a "friend" that causes this same issue with me so I tend to keep my distance. On some level my ex has the same effect on me too. It's not that they're "bad" people but something just doesn't make me you feel good about them and maybe it's your body's way of letting you know it's best to keep some distance. I say trust your gut. I know sometimes we want to figure stuff out and know "why why why" but maybe it's not really necessary to know exactly why, just to know that it's there.
I don't think it's something limited to Empaths. Not everyone has a "best friend" or people they consider friends. But I think that if you are looking to make friends, then you're going to have take a bit of initiative to make them. Put yourself out there a bit. If there are other people out there who are taking the risk of meeting people, then there really isn't any motivation to meet you if you aren't trying. People won't waste their time.
No, I don't get that anymore. I use to have those high highs and low lows and honestly tried to self diagnose myself as being on the bipolar spectrum and even went to a counselor for it. The secret? don't cling. Emotions do all kinds of stuff and if you detach from it a bit eventually it becomes easier to function and the rhythm will change.
Of course we can relate. It's not an uncommon feeling. Loneliness is normal but there's always something you can do about it. I've learned to accept it and use it as a time to reconnect with myself. The loneliest I have ever felt was in a relationship which is weird, right? Because you'd think that by being so close to someone that the loneliness would decrease. But sometimes feeling that way means you're not fully connecting to yourself or expecting someone else to do that connecting for you so use it as a time to just sit with you and be with you. Or you can go outside and just strike up a conversation with someone. Sometimes just that quick split second conversation can help to alleviate the feeling.
But no, you're not alone and a lot of people, myself included can relate.