A Message of Love
Thank you for posting!
I do not have many where I am, but finding a doctor who practices with a more alternative approach could be an answer. You could get the answers you seek with the end result being help for you instead of meds and psych evals. Ask to be guided in the right direction as to what you should do.
I could go on with example to my own experience, but I will be lucky if this posts.
Best to you!
Yes. It was someone close to me and it was weeks in advance, though the hardest part was 3 weeks before. It does feel like a doom/gloom feeling in some cases. I could not stop crying norcould Iexplainto people why I was so upset. I wanted to be alone. I had "visitors" in my house preparing me for it. This was the one that actually got to me so much that a friend told me I was an empath and led me here.
For individuals that I am not as close to it is not as intense but still the same feelings. The physical pains used to be quite confusing for me. Before I realized what was going on I thought there were serious things wrong with me. Once the person is gone those feelingsgo too. I have to say that I used to get anxiety attacks from it and found the things I learned in Lamaz helped me keep those at bay.
And that is where the silence comes in. I get really quiet when it is clear I am not going to be understood. This is the part where I would typically let it go. It seems pointless trying to continue.
What is even more frustrating is having a friend that says the SAME thing and her having it received the way I intended mine to be.
In school the first online class I took was in tone. I have to literally use smiley faces or other forms of visuals to secure my tone or meaning. It helps but there are simply times people do not want to receive what you are saying or are incapable of doing so. People get absorbed in what they want to see and in a range that is all about themselves. Empaths do not generally see anything in this way, so it is as if you are speaking a different language altogether. In essence you are.
Might it be that you are posting in the wrong environment? Is this a cue that you need to shift focus elsewhere? Are you speaking to the right people? These are a few of the questions I ask myself when I am in a place of frustration.
Not saying I am right, but something to think about.
I have always been misunderstood in a way that resulted in my silence most of the time.
People are drawn to you. You are well spoken andintelligent. People may see your language and assume that you are making a statement (orchallengingthemto take it further) even though you clearly askeda simplequestion. In some cases it could be they are not reading the whole question/statement orthey are on a completely different level than you are.
That is what I see when I read your example of frustration.
What commonly happens to me is that I can be in a discussion and people will argue with meeven thoughwe are saying the same thing. There are times when I crave to be around people that are on the same level so I can have good conversation. It frustrates me and makes mefeelalone most of the time.
I know another that tried to bridge together spectrum disorders with empathy. I will say I was intrigued with the implications because of the job I was working at the time.
Do I think that empathy is linked to toxins?It could make mind perceptionmore intense.. but ultimately no. I remember feeling this way from my first memory recall. Trauma or events that make us draw into ourselves can ultimately lead to a keen self awareness (hence finding someone to make us feel better or not alone). Different types of stress can affect the body in a very negative way.
As for me it seems emotions are on my sleeve and do affect me physically. I keep wanting to point out that there is a mind body spirit connection. In my case the spirit has always been stronger than the other two. The last few years have been more about balancing those three. Good diet and exercise can help the mind and body thereby improving the third. Even when I do not feel good or not thinking clear, my spirit is what does not change. I actually gain strength to continue forward. When spirit is not being "fed",it willchange the other two.. or so in my case.
We can spend our whole lives with these questions can't we Most of what I learn I do by feeling and just trust it. This is not true with many around me and I know they often question why I would choose the way I do. Inner truth is there.. we just have to let go of what everone else thinks is right and trust in ourselves. When you are true to who you are.. you can never go wrong.
(Yes I have been guilty of overthinking ) So whoever that was for.. I hope you read it the way it was intended.. (also guilty of being misunderstood since a young age).
I started a response to your post and then it just was not right. So I took a minute because clearly there is a connection to what you describe, and what I went through at the beginning of what is called awakening. I would first tell you that you have had many changes and trying things you haven't before. The move you describe is a big deal after such a long period of time. After all of what I have roaring in my head to give you encouragement, I found one quote that I want you to read..
"Be mindful of your self talk... it's a conversation with the Universe" David James Lees
Now I understand what you are going through.. because you are used to being bombarded with all the feelings in a city environment.. and now you are in a place that gives room for you to reconnect with you. It is not always easy but there is a reason for it. I have often heard that a persons greatest enemy is self. You are making changes that require a different game plan. Trust yourself. You do not need to take on practices of another to feel whole again, though using different techniques to get you there is not a crime. You may find that you will use parts and peices from different practices that work for you. That is OK. You are in a place that we all have to face at some point. To deny all of the uncomfortable parts of awakening is to deny the good ones. You will find balance by facing it.
What works for me may not work for you. Mine was Music... I actually had to find completely new music that was not associated with any previous feelings or memories from a painful past. After a while I could listen to this music again, but I found a way to move through a very difficult time.
I also found that my guides could reach me through numbers.. patterns. My guides must want to drink heavily.. I know they are trying to communicate but Ican have a hard time understanding.
Once again.. you are a few months in and do not let this time weigh too heavy. You are going through a great deal of change and need time to adjust.
When you get the negative self talk.. think of it's exact opposite and say it outloud.
I no longer have TV myself. I got to where I could not handle it at all. Like you, I could not handle the intense emotions fromwhat I was seeing & hearing. I do not miss it.
I had to make trips to the forest this last year. If I cannot go out of town I do go outside in the colder months and find the sun for a while. I also try to be barefoot if I can or shower if I cannot shake it. Quiet, fresh air, and animals keep me on the level. I take walks for short amounts of time if I need to and just focus on all the positive things in my life (and acknowledge them). Meditating in my house can be a challenge but I try every chance I get.
What types of grounding are you using and have you revisted the Empath Survival Guide lately?
"Back to Basics" keeps repeating itself in my head. I remember when I was a child and being facsinated by rocks,throwing rocks in the lake, and hearing/feeling thebreeze blow through the trees with the smell of pine trees all around me.
Find something that you can connect with from another time or place. It might help to get in touch with your inner child.
I have had the same dreamson the same night, with thefeelingsbeingsame (during and after).For me it validates the connection I have with certain people.It really does not suprise me when it happens, though itis as if time stops for a second and everything freezes when acknowledged.Similar to having deja vuwith a very pronounced momentas if I ambeing hit with a spiritual stick.. as it were.When you start to see the patterns and understand that connection it can beoverwhelming.
The most recent "dream" thatstruck me was one that was a bit darker and unsettling. Ihad the same dream with a familymember the next day and we both had a sickened feeling.The worst part is that the dream was about another familymember who had passed. What was lingering around was takingthe form of who we knew, and it was not him. I have to say that one has been hard to shake off. When I realizedshe had the same dreamand shared the same physicalsick feeling... I realized that my connections were getting stronger (This was just before I joined the EC). I would also add that this was a lucid dream.
Do you have lucid dreams often? I would say that I can usually wake myself up from dreams andmessages seem tobe clearerto me.After some time it is easier to receive messages and instruction when I am awake.
You are so right. I think that the struggle for me is just what you are describing here. So you feel others around you and while you would like to speak up.. often times it is just not the right time, nor your place. I have learned this more than anything else. It has to be when someone is ready and asks for help. You cannot force another person to hear you no matter. Even when a person asks for help you still haveto be careful how you do that.
We all have lessons to learn and people that come into our lives for a purpose. I guess the questions stop becoming what can I do with this, to what should I do and"is this person mine to help". That is why it is important for each of us to listencarefully tothose who guide usand see the whole picture. Many timespeople see whatthey want to see. One choice canchangethe course of everything. As always, your insightis appreciated and valued.
Verbal... oh the struggle.
I have found that the ability to feel others (since as far back as I can remember) made it difficult for me to speak to people. Having said that I can be in a room full of people that would not talk to each other because they are so different, but I can speak to all of them and appreciate their differences.
We do have the ability to speak many languages without using different lingo. Sometimes this is hard so I simply show by my actions instead of words. Words can really make a mess sometimes.
Cultural differences influence our use of words and can contribute to the blinders that people wear. It can be hard to find another person to speak freely to.Having the ability to feel another person gives the opportunity to hear them. I find I have relied on this my whole life. And yes, it can annoy others that you can "get" what they say. You would think they would be happy about this, but when you are a "feeler" it can irritate everyone. Ohjoy
Small moves right? A common phrase for me is "show me, don't tell me". It has guided me all of my life(I tireof empty words..). It helpsfor someone to feel they areheard so they cangive that in return. I have been accused of not caring.. but this is simply not true.I find that when someone is ready to hear me.. they will. Even though it is often in the lowest times.
I also have to admit that this is the second time I have written this. The first suddenly disappeared. I made a remark on the firsttry about me babbling on. When I am "inspired" to say things and not sure why..I feel as though I am crazy.
Iwant to bring up that answers are often in the "background". The everyday moments that we do not normally pay attention to.If you take special notice to everything around you and watch the world as if you are watching a movie ~you may see what I mean. When youobserve this,you can point out what should be obvious and bring it to the forefront. It will not be comfortable per se, but this is sometimes imperative for the changes you seek.
Grounding has been the best thing I have learned so far.
May you find calm in rough seas and always have a lighthouse view.
I can identify!!
There is a quote I used to use quite often in fact:
"I am cursed with the ability to see both sides"
So many times it makes it impossible for me to have an opinion. I keep returning to the fact that there are two sides to every story. It is not so much that I know both sides, but rather what is true in my situation. It does not mean there is a right and a wrong answer, but a truth for what I need to do.
Typically I am going to try to help. As time goes on I learn that people need to learn lessons, and see when my help will not benefit a situation. I help those that help themselves.
I do not judge, but I do know what I can or cannot get involved in at the time.
I realize that I can be a drain on others if I allow myself to. I have tried to give back when help is given whenever I see a way. Under normal circumstances I do not see people or they do not reach out to me for help. But when things get really low I will get calls like you can't believe. I do feel fortunate that people who are in darkness would see me as a light in those times. I do not think about the why's so much anymore.
I try to help those that I KNOW have helped me or would help me, or sometimes a complete stranger. I do not have alot to give other than a listening ear and advice, and my time to do that lessens the last few months. In many cases I believe I have gone through such hard times so I can understand and help those around me find a way to keep going. I do filter what I say because sometimes I do not have a way to say what I need to. I am more.. don't tell me.. show me.
Hang in there! Sometimes truth will set you free
I have had the extended deja vu. It does feel like an extended dream. I also remember feeling to pay close attention to detail. Almost like "here it is again, pay attention". Have you ever been with a person having deja vu at the exact same time? I recall one instance when I was younger where my cousin & I both exclamed deja vu at the same moment.
I find it interesting that most of the people I am around will exclaim it and everyone pays attention. There is a sort of reverence in it from my experiences. Interesting.
First of all, I am proud of you for deciding you will face this. Second.. Welcome to the EC.
The ah-ha moments are coming. Please take advantage of the resources posted and know you are not alone. Reading your post takes me back to when I first stumbed (not by accident mind you) to this site. I will say that while I smiled it is not with ill-intent. It allows me to see how far I have come in the last few years.
Once you start to explore the resourcesyou will find the crazy is not so crazy.. that you are in tune and ready to move forward in your journey. This site has been my refuge.. I hope you find that it helps you to emerge from one that could hide and pretend it will all go away, to an individual that can thrive and inspire those around you.
It can be overwhelming but you are not alone.
Being aware of it is half the battle. I would never intentionally do this, though I did question it several months after joining this site if I was or not. I am still learning each day, but sometimes people are sending you this too. So the thought of blocking yourself is not really the best idea if you want to allow other to send you the "good stuff". I try to change the negative to positive and send it back out. There are many different opinions, but this one works best for me.Intention is powerful.
Your surroundings are important for understanding what is happening around you too. I had to strip it all away and start over essentially. I had to rebuild with the new information I obtained through my awakening.. and this is not always easy to do.. but worth it. It all comes back to what you intend to dowith it.
Love & Light
I think we do many things we are not conscious of. It could be you noticing because of the intensity and your attachment to your father.
I have also come to realize it is probable that this runs in the family. I started to think aboutmy childhood. I believe that, for me, this was passed down.. but eachparenthas/had very different abilities...
Coconut oil has helped many with Alzheimers.Ionly learned about it after.. hope it can benefit youand yours.
Love & Light
I cannot handle yelling.. constant negativity.. or someone who laughs at another person's expense.. mean spirited..
One of the biggest issues I have had in relationships is that when you can feel the other person and they do not open up and talk.Many times I felt things coming from him that he would NEVER admit and that I would wait for him to talk about. He never would ~ and it created a huge, as you put it "wall between us".
The first thing I seem to do is withdrawl too.. any sort of deceit and I am going to exit. I don't know that you can avoid all the disagreements.. but possibly change the way the two of you communicate to each other. Sometimes you may not want to talk .. and have to just say that. Same goes for her.. it is give and take no matter who she is.. and respect, honesty, and understanding go a long way..
Then there are times she may pick up on things you do not even realize are going on inside you. Being aware of yourself and your thoughts and actions are important.. of course that is just my opinion.. and I am just a Dice..
I cannot say I enjoy competition as much as it pushes me to be better at what I do. There is healthy competition and otherwise. I also find myself trying to comfort and encourage those who may be hung up on winning to a point it makes them feel like they are not good enough if they don't. Drives me crazy when parents make their kids feel that they are not good enough if they don't win. It is more about challenging yourself to push past where you were yesterday. It's not whether you win or loose.. but how you play the game. I like to learn and have fun more than anything.
Thank you for this post Elise!
I am glad that you are learning those lessons and moving forward. I remember a couple of years ago describing the drowning person just as you have. I too had to come to the conclusion that pulling people into the boat was how it had to be done.. because a drowning person is scared and will try to unintentionally take you down with them out of fear.
Gifts are there so that you know what you need to do. They have guided me well and I trust them.
Most of the time I just want to escape to the forest to get away.. and I have learned to step outside of the situation.There is always something positive in every negative.. sometimes it takes longer to see, and sometimes we just don't want to.Itry to help others see that positive.. perception shift.
Oh yeah.. It doesn't close really.. and good luck on turning it off.. If this is what you are experiencing I just don't see how or why you would want to. It has helped me grow into more than I ever thought I would be. It was an awakening of self in my case. I will never be able to repay such a gift..
Light and Love,
Mine knows.. to a point where we intentionally avoided contact, yet would find reasons to try to talk or spend time together. It was confusing but absolutely the most intense thing I have ever experienced.. I felt like there was a reason and I still feel that after a few years. I do think there was a reason for the why~when~where.. I know he acknowledged that something was going on.. he would make comments and many things happened that cannot be dismissed. I do feel grateful for the opportunity despite the confusion and I look to it as a teaching moment for me. It has helped guide me forward and the lessons just keep coming. I have never experienced anything like it and all with no physical contact.. and I have never had something pick me up and turn me around with little to no effort on either of our parts. Even the words I use to describe it do not do it justice..
I know I found mine.. and I do not feel that I can say anything. I ran away as fast as I could. I regret not stating how I felt.. but at the same time I know that it was not the right time.. things happen as they should and it was the single hardest thing I have ever had to do. I know things will be ok.. and I just focus on what I need to do right now. I can relate to the feelings you describe.. it plagues me. I have tried cutting cords.. removing myself from even the possibility of bumping into him. I have my reasons.. but mostly it is because a choice was made and I knew then there was something I needed to do.. and something this person needed to learn first. I still see it that way. Trust yourself.. but try to sort through the emotion of it long enough to understand it. Best I have..
Everyone has a backstory.. and everyone has to make a choice too. I realize you want to help but I am glad you have backed off some so some fresh air can come in. I have been on both sides of this.. I have been hurt.. but I know I have hurt others and not intentionally. It really is a give and take.. I have and would go through just about anything to help a friend. I also realize there are times I cannot help. The closer you become the easier it can be to lash out too.
I have a friend that I cannot talk to politics about. She talks about it and I just listen. It's not that I don't have an opinion.. but in our relationship there is a line we have to draw.. I can see her point given her situation.. but that does not mean I agree. I hope you find a common ground and that things work out. Everyone needs a good friend.. especially when we are at our lowest. We just have to learn to protect ourselves and allow our light to help them. You already know what you need to do.. but thanks for the opportunity to share
The hard part for me has been to let go.. even for a while. It is true... some friends grow apart and others can go through their entire lives and the relationship continues to grow. Sometimes you do have to cut ties.. it does not mean that it will have to be like that forever. Many times I do not realize what my words do.. I have to apologize not realizing I have hurt someone because I am too caught up in my own life. Not saying this is your situation at all.... but she might be so caught up in her own life to realize what she is saying because she is too busy feeling sorry for herself, and only thinking of herself. From the sounds of it she has been like that for your relationship.
I can relate to the hurts you describe and I think you need to surround yourself with positive right now. If you find that her words make you want to fight back by hurting her.. you may need to back off. It's a never ending spiral ... and usually does not end well.
Light and Love,
I am not sure that they are not trying... however we all have different ways of receiving and interpreting the information we are given. It can be something you would not recognize many times...
I often image mine with a wine bottle just to cope...
But I guess what I need to tell you from my experience is that when I was younger.. I heard differently than I do now. The trick is to ask them to help you "hear". Whether you like what you hear... well.. that is a different story!
It can be really overwhelming at first. When I came in I started reading and asking questions. You will find many empaths that describe different gifts and you will find the tools to help you understand so you can move forward. One of the questions posted by many is "what now?". Find groups that you identify with and you fill find what can help you!
I was just told the same type of story from someone else. Her father who passed quite some time ago was a fan of a country singer, and her grandson suddenly knew everything about him. They don't listen to country but she feels like this could be her dad visiting her son. He even says he looks like the singer. It has stumped the family but I just smiled when she told me about it.
I was born a year after my grandfather passed.. and when I was smaller I knew his face and talked about him. The family had never shown me pics so they were always stumped. He came to me when my dad was sick too..I knew he was coming to take dad with him. I cried like a baby for 2 weeks before he passed. They are not as far away as people think.. and they love their grandbabies
OH man.. did I go through that. I thought I was going crazy.. and I didn't realize what was going on at the time. It helped me to do Lamaze. I wrote more when I was pregnant than any other time. Getting all of it out and on paper seemed to help me.. I loved to put my feet in water too...stretches.. visualizing good things around me and the baby.. and of course my protective nature was in full gear.