Forum Activity for @elsa-k

Elsa K
@elsa-k
09/27/17 02:47:08AM
2 posts

Is Anyone else the Emotional Scapegoat?


Empath

Oh yeah, both of my parents do that to me. I think they've been doing it for so long that they don't realize how absurd it is. Until I went to therapy, I myself didn't think it was absurd until my therapist was like "So, why did your father called you to tell you that?" and I didn't have a good answer. A month ago, I finally told my dad that I can't be his emotional dump ground anymore. My mom still calls me to report anything that shook her though.Whatever they both can't handle, they start to call me since I'm not living with them anymore. It's a situation that isn't normal by any standards, empath or not, but I think my parents feel a certain "pull" to tell me sometimes. So, therapy can definetly help in asserting what's yours and what you pick up from other people. Also, just being aware and telling to yourself "It's not my problem, I don't feel that way, he/she is" helps sometimes. As for video games... probably take a break from the saltiest community in the universe. Just kidding. Sorry, couldn't resist. Can you mute it? Seriously, I do mute my parents on the phone sometimes and I occasionaly answer "Okay/yeah/ I don't know" or other key phrases -your choice really- it seems to do the trick, they're very pleased I'm validating how they feel and I don't hear their negativity. I don't pick up other's emotions (unless they're very dear to me) whenever I don't see them, hear them or come in contact with something they've poured a lot of emotion in. At the very least I'm picking up muted version of their emotions, sometimes it is very strong even if I'm not connected with them anyway. I don't know how it works for you but definetely mute it, if you can. Meditation helps a lot. Give your self ten minutes every day. Lock your door and put on your headphones for ten minutes. I guess just realizing that people have tons of stuff going on in their life and you're just their outlet not the source of the upset, is also helping. Key phrase here: You're not the problem. Try to take it one day at a time.

Elsa K
@elsa-k
09/23/17 01:31:35PM
2 posts

Living in a small town


Empath

I've lived in a big city (okay, eh...not New York big, like 5 million people big) the first 18 years of my life and now I've been living in a small town -more like a village- for about 3 years. People are definetely more reserved and closed off here. I do pick up a suffocating kind of feeling, I think many here feel trapped. Also, be careful if people work with animals a lot. You're going to pick some terrible emotions from the animals. Overall, I think that big cities aren't that bad because there are so many people that your senses can't hone in easily and it kind of all blends in. The good thing about more rural areas is the connection with nature and that the isolation is so much easier and safer to find. It's weird but I think that small communites give off a vibe, I guess it would be a good idea to see what vibe you get from them. Just be careful in your choice, I would suggest not too far away from the big city, it's nice to have the choice to feel lost in the crowd once in a while.