My search begins
Not really sure how to start, so i guess i will give a brief history and see what can be discerned. As a child i could travel in my dreams. I used to fly from my house to my grandparents house or my friends house almost a city away. Sometimes I would also see people or things that i did not know only to meet them in real life later. I also could always sense things around myself in my environment, especially if it was ill intent. For the most part i was really happy growing up. Then one day things changed. My dreams started to show me things of an unfriendly nature. I saw my friends, relatives, and people i never met die over and over in them. When this didn't seem to be enough i started having a re-occuring dream of a man having his throat slit in a parking garage trying to get a woman and a girl to safety from something. As I've grown older, i found out the man i didn't recognize in the dream was an older me, the woman is my wife, and the girl might be my daughter when shes a teenager. I've had this dream since i was 9 until last year when it stopped.
In my teenage years, a poltergeist took up residence in our house. It would torment me when i was alone by flipping on and off the light in the hall and with an overbearing pressure outside my room door. Occasionally when the family was downstairs, we could hear it walk from the hall by room to the top of the stairs. Kind of off subject, but i bring it up due to the fact that when i moved out of the house it too disappeared. Other things of note in those years, I would sometimes see people that my family didnt notice in crowds or as we drove down the road. I started to believe that my being around people caused them harm from my dreams so i decided to separate myself from them. Lastly, i started to notice people around me could be influenced by my moods or my emotions in turn would start to mimic those around me.
As i started my adult years I turned to drinking as i found it would slow my mind and allow me to sleep without dreaming. I stayed like this for a good 9 years until i met my wife and decided maybe to give the 'ol humanity thing another shot. It's been another 9 years since then. I have trouble at work and around friends as my nature is pretty volatile to the emotions of those around me. I still take to drinking to shut things out and get a good nights sleep. I tried to travel in my dreams again, but i met with something that scared me and seems to be waiting right at the edge. The two times i tried it was there and i ran back and was stuck in sleep paralysis for a few minutes each time (which is not pleasant)
I always wondered if this was something that passed down through the family, as my family as a rule comes from not only a lot of secretiveness, but also a pretty good line of alcoholics. I would like to learn to control it not just for myself, but so i can help my family as well. I had 2 kids with the wife, and as my boy became 5, he's started to have dreams he's scared to talk to anyone about, which was about the age i started traveling.
Sorry if it's all a jumble and even more so if its not the happiness and light that usually graces these pages. Unfortunately, for most my life i seem to see the worst in people and the shadows.
updated by @shadow: 01/21/17 04:55:40PM