Forum Activity for @jonathan

Jonathan
@jonathan
05/03/16 02:01:34PM
18 posts

Creating a comfortable environment for an Empath (Rooms and Indoor areas)


Empath

There are a few online communities for different kind of metaphysics/parapsychology areas that can be found through google. Researching them may help in understanding energy manipulation better. Beware though, while there are some strictly moderated online communities with good information, always judge everything accordingly.

Psionics, Magick, Wicca, occultism, the list is long for different kind of areas of metaphysics or parapsychology... The beliefs for each are different but the methods are surprisingly similar in many cases. Psionics, for not having a better term for it, is most likely the most neutral approach to take. You use energy your nervous system generates, or from the surroundings around you, and manipulate that energy to manifest phenomena. Construct is a term used for manifested things, such as for a shield, or a ward or what it is you want to achieve. Psionics shouldn't really contradict with any religion either, though beliefs differ. As for the rest... I have little knowledge of or interest for them, some of them contradict with religions more or less.

Basically everyone is free to believe in whatever they may. Some may find their calling in parapsychology, while the others will steer away from anything that can't be scientifically proven.

Jonathan
@jonathan
05/03/16 01:40:20AM
18 posts

Shadows / Dark beings in dreams and "groping insides" type of feeling


Empath

When I notice these... shadow-beings, and they attack (I'm using the word 'attack' because I don't know what else it'd be, they feel hostile), I literally feel like something's reaching inside of me through my chest/stomach and groping around. That feeling itself feels so horrible and defiling that it can't very well be described. They're always colorless (pitch black), and either formless or in form (I remember once a black cat, perhaps once it was a dog, and I remember a faceless human-silhouette a few nights ago).

The one with the black cat, I sought and managed to befriend it (but whether it was the same dream isn't clear, but for the rest of the night nothing attacked me in the dream). I seem to somewhat think that it could be a foreign element (a creature or a being that's not bound to the physical world, which perhaps feeds on fear). But well, who knows. We see and experience only so little of this whole world...

Jonathan
@jonathan
05/03/16 01:28:19AM
18 posts

Creating a comfortable environment for an Empath (Rooms and Indoor areas)


Empath

You could try manipulating those energies yourself. Just before you start, for a thirty seconds breath in and out deeply. Then go every item through one by one, hovering your hands above them (or whatever method works best for you for energy manipulation), seeing (visualizing) the negative/black/junk energy sink deep into the ground and being replaced by golden/pure/clean energy floating down from the sky (or universe or a planet, it's enough if you believe/think it's clean and pure energy). Another method is just to 'do it': You tell firmly what is going to happen (manifesting your will), believe in yourself and you are able to do whatever it is you're trying to do. This is often considered harder, with no aid of visualization in this, but it can also be more effective. What matters is that you believe in yourself and what you're trying to do. There are countless different kind of methods, and not all of them work for everyone. Just go with what you feel comfortable with, what feels "right" to you.

And about a comfortable environment. There's a term 'Soulscape' I use for art (for me it's paintings, for someone else it could very well be statues, or wall clothes, etc.) that invoke deep thought and emotions (longing, joy, sadness, or something else), a piece of art so great, or rather, meaningful to me (In other words, it speaks to me through every arch and curve, and stroke of color in it) that it makes me lose myself in it. As for how to get these 'soulscapes'... You just know if you like the painting/the statue/the piece of art when you see it. You just know that you want it. It doesn't matter whether it's cheap, or expensive either. And if it's a painting (for me it's always the paintings) it makes the room a lot more comfortable to be in.

Hope this helps.

- Jonathan

Jonathan
@jonathan
05/01/16 05:26:43AM
18 posts

Shadows / Dark beings in dreams and "groping insides" type of feeling


Empath

I've thought of making a dreamcatcher or something similar (with the intent of protecting my dreams andwilling it to do so). These dreams that involve those shadow-like beings or phenomena are just so bizarre that I don't know what to think or what to make of it. Words can't describe how nasty, how defiling, how horrible that feeling as if someone's groping my insides is, being able to do nothing but cower in fear until I wake up. Sometimes the dreams occur on multiple night in the row, often lasting for an entire night and repeating around the theme. Sometimes it's just once in a month. And I gradually forget having them, just knowing I've had them earlier.

Thanks for your reply though.

- Jonathan

Jonathan
@jonathan
05/01/16 02:29:29AM
18 posts

Shadows / Dark beings in dreams and "groping insides" type of feeling


Empath

Hey,

I rarely see nightmares I believe nothing can hurt me, that I'm safe. But there are times when there are these certain kind of nightmares that often continue for the whole of night, leaving me feel tired in the morning. Since the 'myself' in the dreamworld isn't quite as confident or 'fire in the hole!' -type but rather innocent and easily afraid, I may wake my heart racing with lingering fear. The thing about these dreams is that they're very vivid and real-life and seem to take the place in seemingly ordinary and everyday environment (with a slight twists and changes to the environment).

On last night for example, I remember the most clearly dreaming of brushing my teeth in the restroom, having locked the door. At some point, I could just watch as someone unlocked the door from the other side and opened the door. I remember a man standing there, his face blurry in dark clothes. I forced myself to wake when he approached me (I remember the most realistic, absolutely terrible feeling, as if something was groping my insides). The same theme of dream repeated for the whole of night. Everything in dream would be placed in my home (or houses I've lived in), and I'd feel afraid. A single shadow-being would then appear out of nowhere and "attack me", and the "groping my insides" of feeling would follow.

These kind of nightmares are just bizarre. Because they don't follow any specific outline. Sometimes these beings are just formless shadows, sometimes figures of a man (black), last night once it looked like human, sometimes in form of a black cat, perhaps even a dog. Seemingly normal and ordinary dream would suddenly become the most horrifying horror-movie, the next thing I know, the dream has gained "dark vibes" all over it and I realize that somewhere there's something lurking in the fray, and I try to get away but the 'groping insides' type of feeling follows.

I'd like to know whether anyone else has experienced anything like this?

Any thoughts on what may cause these or what to do about them? If it were happening in waking life, I'd force them out with my willpower alone, but when sleeping, I'm left vulnerable.


updated by @jonathan: 01/10/17 09:44:52AM
Jonathan
@jonathan
05/01/16 02:01:47AM
18 posts

Just a thought


Empath

Yeah :)

I'm aspiring to become an author and a poet. Written words as a form to express myself have always been my strongest virtue, in actual conversations I feel like I can never find the right words to speak. In poems, there is no right, no wrong, you can just pour your heart into, feed your soul in too if you like.

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/29/16 02:19:36PM
18 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

I feel very strongly about tragedy: of what was lost, of what could have been, of what simply couldn't be. I feel strangely good about writing or reading it, or just watching it in the form of series. Even music, that certain string-quartet, or a soundtrack, a wailing choir in the background, music can truly enhance the experience. The feelings of longing tragedy causes, the reactions of those affected by it. Simply knowing that tragedy has the power to change a person, and that he'll never be the same again... there's just something beautiful and intriguing about it. I've come to know despair as the greatest force that can move a person, it can drive one insane, it can send one down the path of vengeance, it can affect a person in so many ways.

Don't get me wrong, I feel sad by tragedy. But I also enjoy quite a great deal of it. It makes my hair stand on end, it sends shrivels down my spine. A sense of euphory soon follows, if I'm not already in tears.

By now I've realized. There will be no other happiness for me but the one I create for myself. Dreams, Fiction, Fantasies, I can create. I am a god in my own world. I can give, and I can take away. All with words. I can bring the greatest of sorrows or the most incredible of love. I'll witness countless characters, their lives, their hopes, their sorrows and joys.

Because I just could not have it any other way. I can't give up my muse.

Regardless, I want to thank you for the time you took replying to me. Homosexuality for me is just an ingredient for one of the greatest tragedies: a life without love, darkness without light. Knowing that a person I desire the most ferociously so much that my heart hurts, will never be. No friend either: I can't burrow my head against anyone's chest feeling their warmth, smelling their scent, and I can never feel the satisfaction of sharing joys and sorrows. I don't I just can't believe in humanity. I could never trust anyone enough, watching series, reading books, I can tell long before who will fall a victim, and who's the crook. In fiction, nothing hurts me directly. I can love the characters regardless of their flaws.

Kind of messed up, eh? Probably. Yeah, most definitely. But frankly, I wouldn't change myself. I'm glad I'm me, I'm glad I'm here right now as a person I am. It's likely that if something had gone differently, I would not have become the me I am right now. But also, thinking of all the events that had to go the certain way so that I'd become a person I am right now... It's dazzling.

- Jonathan

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/29/16 01:36:47PM
18 posts

Just a thought


Empath

'Can I ever become free?'

I only want to live free; Laugh so much that my stomach hurts, or cry knowing I'll be okay.

I want to look to the sky and feel I belong, smell the green grass and the sweet air after rain.

And I want to dream, of things long lost, of things that are just too far away to reach.

Of a friend and a warm embrace,

of warmth that'd melt the ice,

of scent that would rival the greatest of flowers.

All while sharing a smile, a cry, filling the black, cold void.

But knowing, dreams will always remain dreams.

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/21/16 12:17:09PM
18 posts

Any empaths have digestive problems?


Empath

A couple years ago I remember having upset stomach quite often, grumbling and growling, especially in public it felt rather awkward. Later though it disappeared after I lost my sensitivity to anxiety.

I don't know about others but thinking back, ever since I remember the time when I most likely awakened as an empath, I've always eaten a lot. Big meals, the kind that people always tend to look at. It was around the same time I became a vegetarian (I only became a vegan a couple years later), I've never put on any weight and I just love eating good (and healthy) food.

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/19/16 02:12:47PM
18 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

I've calculated I have somewhere around 50 years to live. I have thought of what I'd like to do before the time will run out and I'm lying on my deathbed. What I have realized is that I don't really have anything, no grand ambition, no noble goal. I don't really desire anything. My ambition, the will to compete, was taken away.

Nowadays when I see how hard the pianists, violinists, performers of all type compete in all forms of arts, I feel rather empty. Because I know I will never sit at that piano chair playing Mozart, or Beethoven, or I won't ever stand on that stage with my violin. Ifeelempty. Bitter. Jealous. Some performers make such an impact making me feel that I'd truly wish being the one on that stage. Not that I could, my skill level isn't just anywhere high enough. I only started playing 'occasionally' in my teen years, always practicing on my own. First a little bit of piano, a few years ago I picked violin. It's damn hard trying to keep doinganything seriously, when I have no real ambition or competitive spirit. My interests follow the certain pattern, always. The come and go. I may pick something and do it for a couple weeks but I just can't keep it up and then months pass before I pick up that interest again.

Oh Well, can't expect to improve if I don't practice...

There are some things I'd like to do (before I die in 50 years of time). I want to eat good food, drink all kinds of different but good tea. I want to write and publish ten books, and a few poem collections. Perhaps eventually I'd even want to try bungee jumping, wingsuit flying, or something other extreme that would make my heart race. Truth be told, I rarely get that kind of feeling, not even when I'm around people. Though perhaps I know already that I'll never get to do that... that kind of feeling is just one of those wishes that will likely never happen. Other than that, I'd just like to go somewhere high and enjoy my time (days, weeks, months, years) there, feeling the wind, lying on huge green hills watching the blue sky. I can kind of see founding a cafe there (though speaking in business terms, it'd be extremely bad for business), perhaps with a bar. Not that the emptiness would disappear anywhere.

It's just kind of nice fantasizing... of what could be. Perhaps that's why I like writing, why I can't give up writing. It's just my thing. Writing of what I wish could be, of friends and lovers I will never have, of events that will never happen. In fiction, anything and everything is possible. The author is the god of the worlds he creates, or at least an omnipotent being.

I may sound rather pessimistic, perhaps I am. But I don't really want to hope. For me, hope, and especially love are things that cause agony. While I can understand why anyone would like to love, feeling unrequited love can only cause endless misery. Yet why is it that even on this moment I feel deep within me the need to hope, love and be loved?

Oh well, logically thinking, if I just go with the flow and don't think too much into it, I think I'll manage.

I don't want to sound ungrateful, or cold, I apologize if I do. I just don't have the capacity.

But I just know that unless I can get out of this country, nothing will ever change. In this culture, the men are not expected to feel, and definitely do not cry. And they most definitely are not to be hugged or touched. It's frickin' ridiculous... Oh, perhaps it'll change in a couple centuries. Oh well, knowing me, I'll have developed schizophrenia, one personality dying to love, be loved, caressed and cared for and another personality that is a sociopath who hates the world and everything, denies everything, etc. Oh yeah, most definitely. Hope not. Oh, I'm joking of course, thinking of the worse case scenarios. The jokes may be a little dry, but at least they crack me up real well. At least almost.

I'm a rather tragicomedic personality. I nearly always include tragedy as part of my art/creations, poems and books. Tragedy as a theme can be extremely entertaining, enjoyable, and at least I feel often euphoric feelings, especially when watching anime series (Japanese animated series) or reading manga/manhwa/manhua (Japanese, Korean, Chinese, respectively* comics).

Oh, and I must also apologize if I seem somewhat distant. I do however appreciate your reply and your insight in to the matter.

- Jonathan

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/18/16 03:27:54AM
18 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

Hi,

Thank you for sharing your insight, I greatly appreciate it. Without a doubt, I'll eventually come across someone who I can save if I only decide to do so. I only can hope that I'll have the courage to do so.

- Jonathan.

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/18/16 03:20:15AM
18 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

Definitely one of the hardest aspects is to remain completely truthful to one's own self. But what is the truth? I believe there are many sides to the truth, as there are two sides to the coin, four sides to a cube, six sides to hexagon, eight sides to octagon, 12 sides to dodecagon, and so on. Truth at best is always so vague.

It's nearly impossible to tell whether the own self is telling the whole truth. Indeed, I may acknowledge that I'm hurting and because of that I decide to avoid the source that hurts. Now, was it me who made choice? Well, yes, ultimately I made the choice. But again, was it truly my choice, or were I driven to choice that way? Not just that, but out of all the possible choices I could have made, did I really make the best choice? Part of me says it was the most logical choice. But the logical side says it may very well have been due to emotions. But isn't it all also due to the source that made me hurt? What does this tell? At least the fact that logic can be used as a rather good defense mechanism...

Well, now that I have pondered it through logically, I must agree with you. I've yet to be in complete control. Which, to be frank, I don't think will ever happen. Sure, I can try. And I will most likely at some point or another take the required steps forward, and perhaps even something good will come out of it. But only time will tell.

Thank you for your reply.

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/18/16 03:02:10AM
18 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

Hi,

I thank you for the time you took to reply.

I understand what you mean by finding the place. It's said that home is where the heart is, and perhaps it'd also make sense in reverse: the heart is where the home is. I've yet to find my place. But perhaps with time I can find a haven that will mend my heart. Some place green with a vast blue sky where I can be free, like birds soaring in the sky.

Thank you.

- Jonathan

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/18/16 02:53:39AM
18 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

I'm part of Lutheran Christian church, as it's the "thing" in Northern-Western Europe. Catholic church has never reached up to the North. Orthodox Church seems to be more of the thing in the Eastern Europe. But in the end, regardless of the church, Lutherans, Catholics and Orthodoxians are all Christians (at least I think so).

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/18/16 02:46:46AM
18 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

Hi,

First, I want to thank you for taking the time to write back.

I haven't heard of a dark night of the soul earlier. To me it sounds like a title of a poem, perhaps of similar theme I'd write too. Personally I'm just highly intrigued by themes related to dark, night, sorrow, desolation, melancholy, but especially tragedy. I've come to enjoy these themes, they often offer certain kind of euphory, mostly in the forms of poetry, music and arts. And strangely, I don't fear the dark of the night. Rather, it evokes feelings of longing.

There are times when I feel, or rather, realize that if I were to lower my walls, I'd be completely crushed by what looms beyond. The longing, the need, the desire.

Truth is, though we are Christians (not catholics, and we rarely go to Church), it doesn't really show even inside of the family. I can't tell what other family members think, but at least my mother is a believer, as am I. I believe in happy, eternal afterlife. I believe, because the thought of us dying and becoming nothingness, returning to a void, is just too painful. And so I pray. And I thank for everything, all the miracles, simply everything. Things could be a lot worse.

I meditate quite rarely, mindfulness I do every now and then. I've kind of adjusted myself over time to breathe deeply; it's been very effective calming myself. I've also tried (I forgot the name for the technique, void meditation maybe? The one opposite to mindfulness) the meditation technique in which one seeks to empty the mind of everything, and seeking to achieve a state of emptiness.

- Jonathan

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/17/16 03:10:43AM
18 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

Hello,

I want to thank you for your words, for the time you took at offering them. You have given me many things to think about, of, to ponder. Without a doubt, a path in the shadows to the darkness is a path that feels so much easier to walk. But darkness, it is so dark, one desires light. If nothing else, light illuminates the path one is to walk.

Yours,

Jonathan

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/17/16 03:04:38AM
18 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

Hi,

The culture I've lived in is best described as conservative, though globalism has caused it to change slowly but surely. I love my family, and I'm sure they love me. Perhaps I'm trying to protect them, or perhaps, I'm trying to avoid inconvenience that would follow after my confession of being what I am. Though I always desired of being different, perhaps this kind of difference isn't what I originally had in mind. What I wanted was a world of magic and dragons... and perhaps, unicorns. But being able to discern even the slightest of shades and changes in the other person's gestures, voice, expressions... Their first thoughts on everything are often judgemental, or rather, I feel like they are sharps as piercing spears. And that leads from my own insecurity.

I want to thank you for taking time to offer me your feedback, your honest words. I'll take them to the heart.

We have all battled wars, whether on the winning side... Only we ourselves know. Without a doubt, a great many battles will follow. But as long as we live, we remain victorious.

Yours,

Jonathan

Jonathan
@jonathan
04/16/16 02:33:12PM
18 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

I apologize for the long post, and if this goes in any way against the guide lines, you may remove this. I don't know exactly why I'm posting this. Perhaps it's but a feeble need of mine, a need to be heard, a need to share. Truth be told, perhaps I'd like some advice, some thoughts on certain things. But please, don't pity me. I'm not posting this for such a petty reasons. I started with telling of my background.

- -

I'm 21 years old at the moment, I live in a small country of five million citizen. Oh, and I'm a guy, a vegan. I don't use alcohol, drugs, or smoke.

I've never had any real friends, I was pretty much bullied all the way through the Junior and Junior high school. For ten years, it started over fourteen years ago. As I transitioned to high school, there were a couple tough years during which I never talked to anyone of my own age group, I never looked anyone in the eye, I did my best to suppress any emotions: not even a smile escaped. Eventually it became just impossible to talk with anyone, look anyone in the eye or even being near to anyone. My memories of that time are extremely vague, I can't really recall much. Perhaps visual images play a rather huge part in storing memories.

On the second year of high school there was this group of students that kind of took me in, it all began by chatting online. Perhaps what I desired the most at the time was friends, someone to talk to, to share my joys and worries. Until that time I had avoided any contact for almost two years. I told my homeroom teacher of my desire to change and he supported me.

First I learned to make eye contact with others of my own age, and gradually, I started talking a bit, I began seeking company of other students and gradually I began to open up a bit by bit. Those five months felt quite long, the weekends felt even longer. When I wasn't at school, I was always alone. I felt anquish and great anxiety when being away from the others. I remember the Christmas holiday being almost the worst two weeks of my life. I seeked help from alcohol (at the time I was a minor so I couldn't really drink as much as I would have wanted). After a few months of using alcohol as 'spirit booster'... Well, I haven't touched alcohol since. I'm living a substance-/drug-free life.

Anyway, I began opening up and changed quite a bit (although all hardships, changes, etc. I always tried to keep hidden and secret from my family. Back then I always used to think I wanted to protect them, but now years after I think I've never wanted them to know because it'd be inconvenient for me). I opened up to the point when I confessed that I came momentarily out of the closet. Yes, I told them that I'm gay (and not as in 'happy'). Lets just say that things changed afterwards: perhaps they didn't like how I had changed, I had become more open, I expressed myself and my thoughts more clearly, my personality no longer remained hidden. The biggest factor was emotions, however, since I hadn't quite learned to manage them after having suppressed them for as long as I did. Let's just say they caused some inconvenience, well, since I also confessed to someone. And so, I charged back into the closet with such force I almost ended to Narnia. I cut all my ties to those people afterwards, mostly for my own well-being. I'm grateful for their assistance during my hard time, had it not been for that student group, I most likely would be in a lot worse shape. But I just couldn't understand all the bad blood that was given rise to... I understand many feel confused, threatened when an anomaly appears. They don't know how to react to it. Fear gives rise to hatred.

Two years have passed since those times, since I graduated from high school. I have gradually changed. I've grown a lot tougher, harder, colder. Sometimes I really feel like I've started becoming a sociopath. Well, during my darkest days I really, honestly wished to become a sociopath so that I would not have to suffer. I'm often irritated and annoyed, I've become quite foul-mouthed since swearing lessens the irritation I feel.

While homosexuality will without a doubt remain always a part of me, and I accept myself as I am, and I love myself with my whole being, I've made a choice to live without it being a part of my life (since it conflicts with Christianity, my family would most definitely and likely not accept it if they knew and I just can't have my only ties to any other humans cut). I seek to live a life without any sexual intercourse. I'll most likely never kiss anyone (except the Death when it'll eventually come to visit me), and I will live my life alone (in solitude), since I can never have any friends:I'm unable to make any, and even if I did, I'd be unable to have lasting relationships. Besides, I simply can't come to trust anyone except myself, oh and there's the thing with male thing.... having male friends would be just impossible (and yet it's one of things I desire the most). Truth be told, I've kind of lost my hope in humanity. In other humans. Sometimes I kind of hate them, and I hate the feeling of needing them. It's so conflicting. Not a day, not a single moment goes by that I don't feel my heart ache. The constant pressure. While it can't be compared to physical pain, it may actually hurt even more. And knowing that I'll live the rest of my life feeling it... Sometimes I just want to rip my heart out of my chest. It's even worse when I'm out in the public, especially when I happen to encounter other specimen of the same human race who are of same gender. The feel of need to love and be loved, to be noticed, to be cared for... Something I can never have.

I just want to lead a happy life, be happy and regret nothing. I seek to live my life to my best ability, with whatever I have, as happily as possible at each moment. While I used to live in the past, I now live only for this moment. I'm writing books and poetry (I've found my muse which I'm grateful for; an embodiment of tragedy, despair, lack of hope, darkness, disappearing light, loneliness, death, anquish, torment, survival, melancholy, etc.), and truth be told, I think I've written quite amazing pieces... It's been quite important for me to be able to write... the only way how I can express myself.

I honor life too much to ever end my own life with my own hands. But sometimes I have to wonder... I still have family, but there will without a doubt come time and they'll pass away. Nothing scares me more than being completely, utterly alone. I love too much and so I pay the heaviest price. I will be crushed. I will be left scathed, broken. Shattered into so many pieces. And part of my self, my soul will die along with my family. And oh, I do hate this world. I hate it so dearly, for what it is. I could quote Oppenheimer Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds, and I could try and destroy this world. Instead, I'll write a book about it. A fictional fantasy book.

I hate weakness. I've always detested crying, I always tried avoiding crying as a child, and I'm still the same. Even though I try thinking that crying is natural and good for me, I can't cry naturally if I think of it as weakness. And I would never cry in presence of anyone. And yet, I cry quite often. Mostly when reading books/manga/manhua/manhwa (manga/manhua/manhwa,It's not really the thought of death that makes me cry, it's the reactions of those close to the dead that have the biggest impact. It's always the reactions of persons.... But I never cry for myself, I have promised myself not to shed tears for myself. Even if I feel insecure, afraid, vulnerable, weak, lonely. Yet... am I not crying for myself if I cry for the thought of being left alone completely, utterly alone? Perhaps I am.

Forgive me for such a long post. I tried to keep it in good form but... some paragraphs may seem a little out of it. Perhaps the reason why I posted this was because I felt like I needed advice. Perhaps to hear what others think of all of this, or of me. I don't have the slightest of clue what it is I want from my life, if anything at all, or where it should go... I just want to be free of everything, happy and content. I have no ambition, I have no motivation to seek the top. I dislike competition, just one of the things resulting from my youth.


updated by @jonathan: 02/04/17 06:11:08PM