Forum Activity for @nikler

Nikki3
@nikler
09/24/16 09:11:46PM
116 posts

Feelings of hate


Empath

There are always two sides, the spiritual and the psychological. When i get like this it's because I've allowed myself to be frustrated with people getting in my way like my way is more important than anyone elses. I often have to push aside the belief that everyone should be like me, not because I'm perfect but because i have trouble envisioning that people can be mean and uncaring.

What i do is remind myself that every one i come into contact with has an agenda and that agenda may affect a child or a sick family member. They may be going through something i need to have compassion and be patient. I give myself extra time so I'm not in a hurry and i can let crazy drivers or buggy pushers go ahead;, I've got time. 

So, sometimes we don't have complete control of what comes over us, or spirits, or others emotions etc.  However we can control how we react to it. We are not victims that play out a scene we can't control. We have complete say over what our body does and with practice what our mind does. You can in an instant change your mood and perspective, if you are willing. Our mind obeys us, not the other way around unless we let it. 

It's not always easy but it can be done. i think maybe you're looking for an easy sspiritual answer you can cut ties with. There may be some more work you need to do with how you process your emotions. 

Nikki3
@nikler
09/24/16 08:24:59PM
116 posts

are you Alone? i mean really alone.


Empath

I get it. I really do. I find i have lots of friends and family that love me when i reach out or ask for it. But I'm forgettable, if i don't bring something to the table or reach out no one calls or texts or emails. I go to people's places and events, they don't come to mine. I don't know what it is. I stopped having events at my house I've turned it into my sanctuary, it's my place of peace.  i make choices for me, i do the things that i want and i say no a lot now and I'm happier. I'm lonely a lot but happier because I'm not exhausted from giving and not getting. I give to myself. 

I visit a cousin and she tells me how much she appreciates my company, i bring calmness into her life and cancel out drama.... she only remembers this when I'm in the room. it's like people want my Aura present but not really me and they don't even really know why. 

I think I'm a good catch, I'm not bad looking, thin, i make good money, have my own house, no debt but my mortgage, I'm level headed and secure with myself. I go on a few dates with a guy who seems to have a similar lifestyle as me, he ditches me for a girl who is whiny, needy, bossy and has absolutely nothing going for her. then he whines to me about his poor choices in women.

I don't know what else to say except i get it, it's weird, i don't understand it. 

We're just different and rare i guess. I've decided to just enjoy me, do what i want, make myself happy, not give so much, say no, not ever rely on anyone else...It's easier, less draining and I'm happier. Lonely though. i do long for a deep connection wih someone but have lost the hope I'll find it so i just continue focusing on my passions. I ride my horses a lot in the mountains, i just got my class 6 license and a motorcycle, these things make me smile and I'll just keep doing them and investing in me.

Nikki3
@nikler
09/18/16 10:30:53AM
116 posts

Are you a Light Empath or a Dark Empath?


Empath

I disagree with the light and dark labels. I feel like a lot of empaths hold onto the title amd forget that we're still human and human psychology plays a part just as much as anyone else. We have the ability of choice, maybe not whether we are empathic or not but we can control our circumstancesto a degree and what we allow our minds to focus on. A lot of stuff doesn't just "happen to us", we allow it. I believe there is light and dark to everything and while we probably can't choose to eliminate either one, we can choose what we allow ourselves to dwell on and learn about. You may be better at light or better at darkness but that's only because that's where your experience lies whether you chose it out came by it unknowingly. Choose to educate yourself in all that there is and teach your brain to follow wise instruction. We don't recognize light without darkness.

Nikki3
@nikler
09/01/16 09:08:17PM
116 posts

As an Empaths, I fall somewhere in the middle


Empath

Oh and please vent. I know for me I find answers when I talk... venting is good even if all you do is get it off your chest. Don't feel guilty for those you cannot help, they are more responsible for finding an answer than you are for giving one.
Nikki3
@nikler
09/01/16 09:06:13PM
116 posts

As an Empaths, I fall somewhere in the middle


Empath

I get it. I feel that way sometimes too. I've started not responding, I say meaningless things, nod and smile or tell people to do what they feel is right. The thing is most people don't want the truth, they want their truth validated. Part of being able to help is knowing when someone is ready to hear and how much they can handle at a time. If you sense you won't be heard, nod and smile, give a pat non incriminating answer and move on, they're not ready to be helped, nothing you can do about it. Move on. I don't much like quoting the bible but it's like casting your pearls before swine. You have rare gems, don't throw them out to be trampled on, give them to those who see their value and will hold them precious.
Nikki3
@nikler
09/01/16 08:59:28PM
116 posts

Mirroring Vs. Empath


Empath

Heather, this is a difficult one since there are so many aspects. However I am a huge people pleaser, like I can't be happy if I haven't made the universe happy. I give away everything for others and leave myself with nothing and never get anything in return. It's left me miserable and lonely. I've made rules for myself, questions really when I'm faced with a decision to give or please someone else. I never say yes right away, I always say let me thing about it so I can go away and ask myself more qualifying questions. Secondly I ask myself if the person who needs from me would do the same and the answer to this question is my answer to the person. if it's yes I still have to ask myself if I have it to give, do I have extra? Then if I do I ask if it will take away from someone I am responsible for, ie my son. you get the picture. Make some rules stick to them.
Nikki3
@nikler
09/01/16 08:49:43PM
116 posts

Mirroring Vs. Empath


Empath

I looked it up. I'm an INFJ too. Thank you for sharing this, I knew I've been mirroring which I have recognized lately but not been able to put words to until now. Differentiating this from empathy and people pleasing I believe is important and I agree will make a better empath.
Nikki3
@nikler
09/01/16 08:30:05PM
116 posts



I felt this way for a while. I recently met someone who I thought was perfect, instant connection, same lifestyle, should have been it. Until he chose someone else, someone who can't even compete with me. Thus started some pretty heavy introspection because I haven't cared to date since I got divorced 4 years ago until I met him and I melted. I'm a big girl, I know I've lost and I now know why. I'm so so terrified of being hurt that I freeze and close off, it's involuntary actually. Someone has got to really really want to know me if they want to love me because I don't make it easy. Makes it hard for someone to get past the first few dates. I also notice I want the ones that are unavailable and the ones who want me well, they terrify me and I want to block them all out and run away. I don't know how to fix it yet but at least I know my part of the problem. I'm not sure I can handle another hurt, and thus my heart flees for it's life. On the flip side I want to build a life with someone but I cannot have something superficial or convenient it's not in me. So I guess I just have to be patient with myself and hope I find a patient man who sees me and is willing to take the time. In the meantime I am going to continue living my bad a** life as best I can, learning and growing my own empire until I find a partner worthy of ruling it with me.
Nikki3
@nikler
09/01/16 07:58:24PM
116 posts

As an Empaths, I fall somewhere in the middle


Empath

Maybe you just answered your own question. I know for me when I find the answer it resonates with me to the point of tears, it strikes a chord. Fear may be your answer... maybe you need to change your response (for lack of better description) to people that drag you down ao that you don't have to fear talking to them. Allow the frustrated to slip into patience, hear them out without the intention of being caught up... change your reaction to their words so there's no reason to fear or avoid those conversation. Maybe you habe to avoid for a while so y can heal or overcome first.
Nikki3
@nikler
08/31/16 10:57:31PM
116 posts

As an Empaths, I fall somewhere in the middle


Empath

I used to literally be terrified of the dark, terrified. Being alone at night, nightmares, etc. Until someone told me a story about a Christian man I think it was cs Lewis. He lay in bed one night and the devil walked into his room and he looked up and said "oh, it's just you" and ruled over and went back to sleep. true or not, belief or not, I realized these monsters cannot hurt me unless I let them. I was a teenager at the time but I still think of that story today and it still rings true, I choose what I let inside. I organize my spiritual space. Hell invite the monsters in for tea now because they cease to be scary. Perspective changes everything.
Nikki3
@nikler
08/31/16 10:48:56PM
116 posts

How can I deal with being ugly and social anxiety


Empath

I used to hang out with this girl all the time and we go to bars and party. I don't think I'm ugly but I'm not stunning either. The guys would hang of her and give her numbers etc and never look twice ay me. One day I asked her why, she was 10 years older me too. She looked at me and told me I am unapproachable, I'm always frowning, I look miserable. Wow. Sounded mean but she was right, that advice changed my life. When I go out now I smile a lot, I talk to everyone I can regardless without intention or expectations. I am approachable and it is a very different experience... or at least I can choose when I want to be. Ugly or pretty doesn't have to define us, I know some people who aren't that attractive by societies standards but everyone wants to be around them. Be that person that others enjoy being around. Love yourself and don't let the opinions of others decide whether you are beautiful or not.
Nikki3
@nikler
08/31/16 10:37:55PM
116 posts

Mirroring Vs. Empath


Empath

Very interesting, I did that test but don't remember what letters I am. There have been times when I reflect on a visit with someone and wonder if I had been doing this. I never thought of it as a 'thing' it just didn't feel like empath feeling. Reading the words you put on it brings it to life for me, I do this often and it's completely involuntary. I don't even realize it until after. Sometimes It makes events harder for me if people I know well but are very different attend the same function. I don't see it as people pleasing, that's different and calculated. I sometimes hear people tell me I've changed from when they first met me, I think it happens a lot until i am comfortable being myself around new people (which is actually rare when I think about it). This realization came about shortly after I wondered if I was an empath and started taking notes and analyzing my experiences with people. Thank you for sharing, this is really something to think about.
Nikki3
@nikler
07/21/16 11:49:22AM
116 posts

Dreams


Empath

I always dream vividly and in colour. I've heard some people dream in black and white which I think is weird. it is a rare and welcomed night when i dont dream, how peaceful. Sometimes I wake up and don't know where I am or look around for who was in my dream. Sometimes they make sense and coincide with my worries or current events and sometimes they are so strange I cannot explain them. I really should start writing them down. I used to have nightmares, awful nightmares until someone put the idea in my head I could change the course of my dreams by using the fear to bring myself into a semi-lucid state. I've pretty much perfected that. I either wake up or become partly conscious in my dream and make changes as I would to a movie set. The mind is an amazing thing. I'm curious what other people think about it.
Nikki3
@nikler
07/15/16 10:46:58AM
116 posts

What do sociopaths feel like to you?


Empath

They feel like an empty parade to me. Like something big and bright is coming but contains nothing. Hard to describe. I've had enough dealings with them that I can see them coming and avoid engaging with them. Just don't have the time or patience any more.
Nikki3
@nikler
07/15/16 10:38:21AM
116 posts

need advice from other empaths.


Empath

I do this all the time. I actually avoid relationships now because I swing emotionally hard both at the beginning and the end. The end always seems inevitable so why bother. I know sounds depressing but I figure if a man wants me he'll take the time to get to know who I am and if that ever happens I'll give it a second look. Until then I am who I am and I have to actively stand strong on that. I don't play games, I don't wait for texts, I say what I mean and when I want to say it. If someone shows me their true colors I believe them. i live by my own integrity. Every day I actively own my emotion and throw away what is unrealistic and not mine. Logic is the key that balances the emotional empath.
Nikki3
@nikler
07/13/16 11:28:33AM
116 posts

Confused on what to do where to go?!?!


Empath

If you go out into the garden and fill your basket with strawberries you will have a basket of fruit. If you go and fill it with weeds you will go hungry or eat bitter food. The choice is yours. Every moment of your life is a choice, smile or frown, love or hate, darkness or light. Choose to fill your life with love and light and you will have it. It may not be easy at first but it is simple. Let the dark spirit follow you if that's what it is, maybe it will find light in you, you do not have to choose to partake in it's darkness. Happiness does not fall from the sky into your lap you must create it. :)
Nikki3
@nikler
07/13/16 11:23:19AM
116 posts

how were/are you with the pets in your life?


Empath

Animals love me. My mom says when I was little (around 4-5) I used to line all the neighborhood cats and dogs on the front lawn and make them behave. I've always had a way with animals, pretty much any species.
Nikki3
@nikler
07/13/16 11:19:03AM
116 posts

Is this common among other Empaths?


Empath

It's annoying sometimes. I'm a very private person and introverted so I'm always amazed at what people will tell me. Complete strangers walk up and start talking about their lives and lead into very personal things. I hear I don't know why I told you that, you're very easy to talk to, thanks for listening, I've never told anyone but, etc. All the time! I get hugs a lot, sometimes people hang on longer than I think is necessary... I don't really like to be touched unless it's someone I'm close to. I think they feel my calm nature and want a few extra seconds of it. It's exhausting really and I spent a lot of time alone and I say no to many social events unless I have a close friend with me. I think it's very common.
Nikki3
@nikler
07/13/16 10:58:35AM
116 posts

Experiencing a strange phenomenon, strange questions?


Empath

I would see it more as a prediction. You pick up on his feelings and vibrations and sense what he may not be able to himself. You felt it coming. Has he been to a doctor for this? I don't believe you can project a physical illness on someone, if you are toxic you can cause some to be sick over time but your anger can't create a seizure in another person.
Nikki3
@nikler
07/13/16 09:39:58AM
116 posts

Empaths and Anti-depressants?


Empath

Speaking of anxiety I never experienced it until my son was born, his father left, my life was upside down. I started getting panic attacks too. It was horrible. I would go visit my family 8 hours away, wake up at 6 am pack up my son and drive home because I needed to be home... now.I'm better, I still get them, but it's a battle with my mind. Asking myself if there's really an emergency, why do I feel this? Is it rational? I talk to myself internally, find a quiet place to meditate, tell myself there's nothing wrong and everything will be fine. I tell my body to shut it down, lower my heart rate, soften the sharp edges of the feeling and focus on what's important. My family, live in the moment enjoy their company. That's what I came for and there's no rational reason for throwing everything in my truck and burning home. There just isn't. I don't always win but it's so much easier than it was 10 years ago.
Nikki3
@nikler
07/13/16 09:32:26AM
116 posts

Empaths and Anti-depressants?


Empath

I have been offered anti depressants many many times. I always turn them away as I'm not depressed but because there is no description of my issues in a medical journal doctors hands are tied. There's a time and place for the medical dr, the natropath, and the spiritual and mental guides. It's about being whole and treating with the appropriate 'medicine'. I talk about the power of the mind all the time to people who are struggling. In every aspect of our life we look for the easy way out, a quick fix, a pill or advice that will take it all away. Weight loss, depression, grief, sadness, jealousy, poverty, etc. The reason we do this is because the path is hard, we don't know how, we don't have support or we feel somehow it's wrong to go through it. Each of us has the power within our mind and our will to take control of our lives and our actions. We can make decisions. Our minds are weak and it takes time and effort and failures to strengthen our ability. Just like a weightlifter starts with 2lbs weights and works his way up... we have to be satisfied with small decisions and baby steps and not see a fall as complete failure. It's a journey. Always focus on the end goal, make plans, map your steps, note the decisions you are capable of making and note the ones you want to be so you can recognize the steps in between. do what is right not what you feel. You have the power. Surround yourself with people who will encourage and support, get rid of negativity. Make a series of good choices. I found this article really interesting.http://upliftconnect.com/shamanic-view-of-mental-health/You are on the right track, one day at a time, one decision at a time, strengthen your mind and your will one bit at a time. You will look back and see how far you've come.
Nikki3
@nikler
05/04/16 08:54:31AM
116 posts

How do we live with this


Empath

Sometimes you have to put feeling aside and put yourself on auto pilot and just go through the motions. Let your logical side take over for a while and put your emotions in a box on the shelf. You need to eat 3 meals a day, just do it, you need to drink water, just do it, your brain knows what your body needs it's ok to be a 'zombie' for a while so you can get emotional rest. Make lists and schedules and follow them without thought or emotion just for a little while. Love and light. Keep reaching out.
Nikki3
@nikler
05/03/16 01:45:48PM
116 posts

How do we live with this


Empath

Definitely something to think about. I read about a study that was done on rabbits. They left one rabbit alone with a choice between water and cocaine laced water, every time the rabbit chose the drug. They had a rabbit set up again with both choices but with other rabbits and games and toys and the rabbit chose the plain water and left the drugs alone. We are not so different from everyone else that our needs are wildly different. We still require family, community, connection, joy, etc. Happiness is a choice, you must fill your own cup with the things that bring you joy. It can be difficult but the things worth having are never easy to obtain. Make a list, write down where you want to be what y eant to do, add some steps that are required to get there, start taking them and crossing them off while adding new ones. It's a journey, before you know it you will be somewhere else.
Nikki3
@nikler
05/03/16 12:25:02PM
116 posts

Shadows / Dark beings in dreams and "groping insides" type of feeling


Empath

I have had these types of dreams from time to time. Less now. During my waking hours I used to tell my subconscious that if it happens again to wake me up. This didn't really solve the problem it just got me out of the dream and usually I could not go back to sleep without falling back into it so I'd just get up. Then I started telling my subconscious to actively remind myself to not fear but to act out of curiosity and explore what was there or give myself permission to change the dream to the content of my choice. I rarely ever get these dreams any more, and when I do I feel the fear creeping and I feel the switch and it always recedes or turns into something else. I think it is either an energy leach or our internal fears coming to light. It's interesting to me that the black cat had something to do with repelling an attack which could be your subconscious bringing something in at a point when you were sensory overloaded or maybe to divert your attention and wake you up. Our minds are amazing things and we can't chalk it all up to the spiritual and things we can't control we have to investigate with an open mind and confidence of character.
Nikki3
@nikler
05/03/16 11:58:14AM
116 posts

How important is your diet


Empath

I doubt very much that diet place a part in triggering or enhancing abilities. However when I don't eat right I have little energy and I'm more moody... seeing the link? I can't control my abilities without energy, the more I have the better I am at protecting my energy, where my mind wanders and my moods. I prefer to eat a somewhat paleo diet, I feel the best when I am eating good meat, veggies, fruit and fat... I stay away from carbs, grains and especially sugar.
Nikki3
@nikler
05/03/16 11:51:12AM
116 posts

How do we live with this


Empath

There is a very good chance you are having a one way energy transfer with this girl without really knowing it. You give freely to her and she does not give freely back emptying you of your stores. This is not intentional foe either party. You've allowed it because that's where your thoughts stray when you want to be fulfilled. She has boundaries created by her lack of romantic feelings for you, you have crossed the roamntic line and not come back because you don't want to. You need to set some boundaries both physical and emotional, temporarily spend less time with her or none at all. You need to plan to do things that you like in your spare time, things that you take joy in. Without including her physically or emotionally or mentally. You must find joy alone and within yourself before y will be fulfilled with a partner. Keep in mind it is not a thing to hold but a skill to obtain. Any time you suffer loss or bad things happen you can reach for this skill and find joy. I agree 100% with angel, well said!
Nikki3
@nikler
04/25/16 01:43:14PM
116 posts

Is It Just Me Who Attracts Narcissists/ Sociopaths?


Empath

The important thing to understand is that we're easy prey for someone who wants something because we feel and we care. I don't think narcopaths actually recognize empaths, I think they use the power of numbers, they ask 10 people one of them will do it.. we'll ask that one over and over until it wears out and move on to the next 10. Empaths are particularly susceptible to this because we feel and care deeply and generally want to help and support people. It's not 'you' necessary. What is 'you' is not being able to recognize or say no because you can't control the negative feelings you get when you say no to a narcopath... they generate angry and negative feelings when they don't get their way to see if they can change that... another reason we are so susceptible... we pick it up where others wouldn't. It's very important for ths to have physical and emotional boundaries because they do intertwine. I have rules for myself, one of them is 'i care for those who care for me, that care must be verbal and physical and they must match'. Another is 'i will say yes to those that say yes to me'. Another is 'if someone's actions don't match their words, believe their actions'. Remember that our intuition can fail us if the feelings are strong enough and we're not savvy to determining if they are ours or not so our physical rules help out emotional rules and intuition by 'lining up or not'. You cannot change people's basic core values. They can change temporarily for a cause but once that cause is expired they will go back to what they were. Only spend your efforts on people who want to change AND physically take steps of their own accord to do so. You have choices! Love and light :)
Nikki3
@nikler
04/25/16 01:31:50PM
116 posts

Is It Just Me Who Attracts Narcissists/ Sociopaths?


Empath

s the common conceptualization of the psychopath.Traits of a Narcissistic SociopathHow do you spot a sociopathic narcissist? Watch for certain traits:A driven quest for power. If a narcissistic sociopath cares about anything other than himself, it is destructive power and control over people.Behaviors that seek love and admiration. To be sure, this isn't needy love. It's not even emotional love. It's superficial. A narcissistic sociopath sees love and admiration as power tools to manipulate and dominate (Do Sociopaths Even Have Feelings?).No apologies, no guilt, no remorse under any circumstance. A sociopathic narcissist believes that she is a gift to the world who makes it richer and more colorful. Therefore, her calculated, even cruel actions are always justified.Invincibility. The narcissistic variety of sociopath believes he is indomitable. Even punishment and prison can't stop him. They're merely part of the game.Wholly self-serving. The needs and wants of others are insignificant and undeserving of consideration.Act as the producer, director, and only actor of his own show. The narcissistic sociopath casts people in roles that increase his power and sense of importance and when bored, casts them aside.
Nikki3
@nikler
04/25/16 09:13:42AM
116 posts

Is It Just Me Who Attracts Narcissists/ Sociopaths?


Empath

I used to. After enough experience I can spot them a mile away and stay clear. I think there's a draw, they don't think or care or mull stuff over, they just act, how seemingly refreshing to us who struggle to separate all that goes through our heads. They are very destructive though, like a silent tornado, they hurt and injure and maim all the while making you believe that you caused it and you need them. Don't be fooled. It is what you think it is, don't second guess your intuition. sometimes we have to be selfish to protect ourselves.
Nikki3
@nikler
04/22/16 11:57:11AM
116 posts

Warning: intese emotions.


Empath

I agree too, he is not a good guy if he treats you like crap, you can't be both. It's difficult being an empath and not seeing someone only for their potential. Don't stick around for his potential when he's showing you he clearly isn't going to live up to it. You deserve better. Cut him out, stand up for yourself. Good luck!
Nikki3
@nikler
04/22/16 11:49:27AM
116 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

You have been conditioned by your upbringing. You need to stop saying "I am" and "I can't". Cry and hug and don't apologize. You have no desire or ambition because it's been too painful in the past, just do it. Once you start doing and finding out what you love, reviving your passion without caring what anyone thinks your ambition will come back to you. Your biggest problem is you, you've told yourself what the rules are and have bound yourself to abide by them. Change the rules, write the things you like down and start crossing them off! I hope you find some light and some freedom for your soul... don't wait for the right time or moment or place... it won't come. Do it now. :)
Nikki3
@nikler
04/22/16 11:43:12AM
116 posts

When the life is a living hell


Empath

I can't begin to understand completely how you are feeling but I can relate on a different level if you take away the component of homosexuality. It must be truly difficult to feel completely that you cannot be yourself and you must suppress what your heart desires.My advice - the heart wants what it wants, go out and find it. Dance like no one is watching! If your family truly loves you they will find a way to accept and embrace all of you, it may not be easy or instant, but you must stir the pot if you want to make changes.Join a gay group, meet men, find your happiness, take risks. At the end of the day you will only have your life to account for. I promise you there are some amazing people out there, you will stumble, be disappointed, heartbroken even, but you will find kindred souls and amazing experiences and have stories to tell. You will build a family that is not blood.You cannot have happiness and reject your true self. It is one or the other. Let me tell you it is a very beautiful thing to find out who truly loves you even though it can be heartbreaking at the same time. It is a true gift, bitter sweet.
Nikki3
@nikler
04/22/16 11:25:16AM
116 posts



I've been there, I'm so bad for seeing people for their potential and not for who they really are. I love their potential and it's frustrating when they never come close to achieving it. I live by the expression "when someone shows you their true colours, believe them". If he really cared it would show in his actions and words. When the two do not line up I tend to believe the actions. His kind words and flattery are what he's learned people want to hear and get him out of his poor actions. The question is are you going to allow it to continue. It will not change.
Nikki3
@nikler
04/22/16 11:18:39AM
116 posts



I believe there are two separate realms that are intertwined if that makes sense. There is you and your beliefs and you hopes dreams and fears. There is the spiritual and the senses you pick up from your surroundings. I'll try to explain as best I can hopefully it resonates with you. Your initial reaction of fear and anxiety most likely stemmed directly from what you believed about the spiritual or lack of knowledge about what was happening, the reason I believe this is because fear left when you decided maybe it was okay, if you were picking up the sensation of fear from outside it would not have changed with your mind. I think the hardest part is knowing what is you and what is other. When you are feeling good and not sensing anything tell your subconscious how to react when you do. For example I tell myself out loud the next time it happens to ask myself if the fear is mine and if it is to change my mind about it while it's happening. Sounds corny (I'm new to this too) but it works. You can tell yourself to react with curiosity instead of fear so you can truly tune into the feeling or message and read it without the inhibitor.

When sensing negative energy you can ask yourself if you care what they think, you can feel the negative energy and send it off not letting it bother you - y decide if it sticks or slides off. You could take a physical action and approach the person if you know who it is, smile and ask how their day is... this will interrupt their thoughts and maybe change their judgment of you.

I am just learning about chakras and have been doing small meditations with the heart one and it is very helpful. I too have not shared this with anyone I know personally because it seems corny and I don't think they would understand. However I have learned to love myself and be confident in the person I am. Love me or leave me I say, you can't put a price happiness.
Nikki3
@nikler
04/19/16 12:33:31PM
116 posts

Finding Love as a Male Empath but definitely want responses from the Women here too


Empath

Another note is that we are taught that when we love it conquers all. I've learned that love is not enough, just because I love someone or feel for them in some capacity does not mean we were destined to be together or are compatible at all. We can be drawn to people with feelings of what we call love but we are not taught to decipher what that means. Love is not enough to form a lasting long term relationship, there are so many other factors that we need to consider. Doesn't mean we shouldn't be there for the people we are drawn to just not in the capacity we were taught it means. I hope that made sense :)
Nikki3
@nikler
04/07/16 07:10:22PM
116 posts

Does the word "No" sound like the word "Maybe" when spoken by an Empath


Empath

I totally get it, I used to drop everything for anyone and help everywhere I could. I got tired of being walked on and when I needed something no one was there. So... I told myself no more the only time I will drop my plans for someone else is if the person who is asking would do the same for me. I ask myself "would this person come if I called?". The answer to this question is my answer to them.

Nikki3
@nikler
04/07/16 07:02:01PM
116 posts

Does anyone feel their empathic sensitivity is getting stronger with age


Empath

I'm sorry you are dealing with so much. I believe dealing with our empathic abilities is a balance between the spiritual and the physical. When the physical is tired it is harder to keep the spiritual in check. It takes energy and mental awareness which illness uses up a lot of. However, as sad as you are I think it's great you are reaching out and I believe you will find some support here. I will give you my suggestions and hopefully something will sit right with you.

I used to have nightmares all the time, looking back some of those nightmares were spirits visiting me. I'm not entirely sure now they were evil or demonic but after watching movies and the odd horror when I was a child I personally associated ghosts with fear. I somehow found a way to block the spirit world entirely and I have kept that door very closed with unbelief for years. Just recently I have been drawn back to the empath world but being older and more mature I am trying to look at it from a different angle (I didn't know back then what I was so I had no way to deal with it). Since opening this door a little bit again I have had some encounters and have had to tell my subconscious not to react in fear but in curiosity and it seems to change the experience immediately.

I think you can set boundaries with the spirits - talk to them and let them know they can stay in the room but they cannot touch you. Speak out loud if you have to. I recall a story someone told me about an evangelist I can't remember his name but the story went something like he was visited by the devil in the night and he said "oh it's just you" and rolled over and went back to sleep. This story helped me tremendously with controlling my fear - they can't harm me physically and they won't spiritually if I don't let them. Boundaries - in the physical and spiritual.

Take care of your physical body, eat good food, exercise, take your vitamins, etc. The energy your physical body has will help you deal with the spiritual.

Find something to smile about at least once a day - being an old soul maybe you've lost your joy. Having seen and experienced so many things makes 'just being' exhausting. Look for things you can do and see that will make you smile or you will find interesting... find your joy.

Meditation is so important, talk to your sub conscience and tell it what you want to be aware of, what you want to recognize. Look into your Chakras as well - light and love. IT's all connected.

Anyway, I'm fairly new to this so just some ideas for you to look into - take what you feel resonates with your soul and leave the rest if it doesn't. I don't believe we were designed to be plagued. Wish you all the best.

Nikki3
@nikler
04/06/16 08:03:45PM
116 posts

Ghost smells.. ??


Empath

It was very powerful smell enough to drag me out of dreamland. I'm guessing it was spirits... Maybe had something to do with the ladies faces I saw but I didn't recognize either of them and didn't know them in my dream. It wasn't like I was dreaming of them I was seeing an image or real life video... almost like I was the ghost peeking in on them and they didn't know I was there. If that makes sense. I alwayw thought if a spirit were to visit me it would be someone I knew checking in. It's the first time I've recognized it as anything other than my imagination though. I will have to pay more attention.
Nikki3
@nikler
04/06/16 11:43:23AM
116 posts

Found a book that really seems to help make being an empath a bit easier


Empath

Thank you for sharing I was looking at books but there are so many.
Nikki3
@nikler
04/05/16 12:08:02PM
116 posts

Ghost smells.. ??


Empath

Interesting, I'll have to do some thinking as I don't know of anyone departed that smoke would remind me of. I am extremely sensitive to smells normally. I can't have strong smells in my house, no air freshener, smell free cleaners, etc. I don't wear perfume or use strong smelling products on my person. I can't bear it.
Nikki3
@nikler
04/05/16 10:41:37AM
116 posts

What do empaths do for a living?


Empath

I understand that, my company has a very high moral compass so it sits well with me for the most part. If I had to choose a career regardless of money I would wouldwork with children or animals, horses are my passion but because I am the sole butter earner and my son is still dependent on me I have come to terms with it. I work with great people too which makes all the difference. :)
Nikki3
@nikler
04/05/16 09:39:11AM
116 posts

Ghost smells.. ??


Empath

So last night I was drifting off to sleep, not quite out but started dreaming. I saw an image of two older ladies talking, one was smoking. The smoke wafted toward me, I could smell it, I felt it curl up into my nose and and it woke me up. I could still smell it when I woke up, I lifted my head and started sniffing around to see if something in my house was burning and nothing. I laid back down and could still smell the faint scent of smoke as it faded off my pillow. This is not the first time, it happens every so often but I always chalked it up to my mind playing tricks until recently when I started to realize I may have empathic abilities and I've been taking notes of odd things so I could piece it together. any ideas?
updated by @nikler: 01/18/17 05:38:24AM
Nikki3
@nikler
04/05/16 09:31:44AM
116 posts



Calgary
Nikki3
@nikler
04/04/16 03:43:26PM
116 posts

What do empaths do for a living?


Empath

I've had many jobs in every industry from accounting to dog food manufacturing. I never lasted more than 2 years anywhere, I worked as an administrative assistant. I hated it, mostly working with women in repetitive thankless jobs. Until I finally found a company that would let me switch, it's surprising how they don't want you to change what you do when you're good at it whether you are happy or not. I am now in the quality industry and I work on projects so it changes all the time and I work mostly with men and a few courageous women lol. I love it! Men don't tend to have the need for constant gossip, they don't hover and micromanage, they don't think and feel crap 24/7 like women do. It's working well for me. I can't run my own business I get carried away with the creative part and hate the business part, not my thing. Do what you love, love what you do, know yourself :)
Nikki3
@nikler
04/04/16 11:48:13AM
116 posts

Need help understanding how energy works


Empath

Anytime Bella, I do the same thing, I think we all do when we just start out trying to listen instead of think. Go with your heart :)
Nikki3
@nikler
03/31/16 11:20:07PM
116 posts

Need help understanding how energy works


Empath

I think we get hung up on logic and forget to listen to our spirit. Like you said you made an agreement to not talk, so you want to honor your word, I get it. Nothing wrong with wanting to have integrity. However since you are making a transition in your life to start focusing on your spirit, your intuition, or whatever you want you want to call it, maybe you need to rethink. If the deal wasn't made would you change your actions? What is your heart telling you to do? What sits right with your spirit? I would take some time to clear your mind and focus on what the message is, there's nothing wrong with calling your friend and saying you don't feel right about not talking or asking for a pause on your agreement. Tune into your intuition and see what feels right.
Nikki3
@nikler
03/31/16 08:57:58AM
116 posts

The illusion of Death.


Empath

Having been through both I can say I would never wish the sudden unexpected loss of a loved one on anyone. However, to be fair the ones I've had to say goodbye to were elderly and I had expected their demise. My Nephew was 26, had a wife and a little girl, he was on his way to my house we had plans. It is akin to having your heart ripped out and reattached in a botched surgery no one can repair. So, even if the goodbye is rough and not what you expected be grateful you have the chance to say goodbye. Just my opinion.
Nikki3
@nikler
03/30/16 08:44:54PM
116 posts

The illusion of Death.


Empath

I have done this too, not sure why, it's like I was feeding off my own emotion... somehow I felt the need to finish the feeling of the thought for lack of better description. It's a total waste and I had to catch myself and cut the thought short and push the feeling of it away. I think I did it because I needed to reassure myself I can survive such an intense emotional experience... similar to practcing first aid - you go through the motions so you know what to do. I lost my nephew tragically a few years ago and nothing could have prepared me for that, it was a million times worse than anything I ever imagined. I can say though that I don't really have those thoughts or daydreams anymore about dealing with a tragedy. I don't know if my nephews death cured me or I just don't have time anymore... but I do understand where you are coming from.
Nikki3
@nikler
03/30/16 08:26:05PM
116 posts

Need help understanding how energy works


Empath

Maybe your intuition is telling you something. I always grew up believing that a strong feeling about someone was nature's way of telling you to connect. Every time I get a strong feeling or presence of someone I call them or write them... there's always a reason for it. The one time I ignored it I regretted it deeply and now can't be fixed. But it's up to you if that resonates with you at all. It kinda depends on your gifts. :)
 
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