Forum Activity for @kaolin

Kaolin
@kaolin
02/13/16 12:56:39PM
28 posts

Lost connection


Empath

Thank you ~ to both of you. It is hard to remember that we are all here for a reason;

I think I'll stay inside today though...the -33 degrees feels unwelcoming! Maybe tomorrow! ;) But lots of deep breaths and meditation from inside a warm home will do for today.

I will do some reading on Pleiades and see what I can see.

It makes a world of difference to hear the kind words of others. Thank you again.

Kaolin
@kaolin
02/13/16 06:54:59AM
28 posts

Feeling alone


Empath

Morning Tressa~

I just posted on another group how I am feeling so disconnected form the "real world" ...

I have tried my whole life to fit in and have not been able to. I don't know how to manage it well yet, but wanted to say you are not alone in the feeling.

And I have heard that the universe doesn't give us more then we can handle...but there are days I wish it didn't think so highly of me. ;)

Kaolin
@kaolin
02/13/16 06:37:45AM
28 posts

Lost connection


Empath

Good morning~

Joined this group as soon as I saw the line..."Feeling lost" in the description...I am hoping writing this can help me.

I am feeling increasingly disconnected; I have no desire to connect with the 'human' world, and feel as if it's unsafe. I have no 'friends' or people I feel connected to in my day to day life. I often am overwhelmed and put off by the way people live and the state of our world. If I am not at work, I often hold up in my home, watching reruns on netflix and shutting down, zoning out and avoiding the world as much as possible.

I have tried to connect, but people don't like me; (or so it seems) I have never felt a part of the general population and for a while thought I found a home in a spiritual community, but lately, even there all I feel is the falsehoods, the judgements and masks people wear. It too has became a place where I don't feel safe. I have a strong sense that people are not genuine and it saddens me to the point of exhaustion. Grounding works, but only for a little while; I can't spend a lot of time in public. If I focus on compassion it will help too, but also only for a short period.

These people here, on earth, do not feel like my people; I struggle to feel connection to anyone. I have a handful (literally less then 5) of people who I trust and feel connection to but they all live out of town. I feel as though I need to do something to 'fix' myself...so that I can be a part of the 'real world' but then I feel conflicted and think, no, I'm not wrong, the state of the world is not authentic and it pains me. It doesn't feel like I'm coming from ego, but maybe I am.... I have for a period of my life, ran by ego; I was 'better' then the rest of 'them' but that's not what this feels like. I can see and understand why people live the way they do. When I meet someone who is struggling in whatever way, I can show compassion, I can listen and support and send love. I feel though that I am alone in my view of the world. The daily grind is not something I'm built for. I don't care what 'stuff' I have or how to get more money to buy more stuff. I stopped paying attention to the news like 25 years ago because I knew instinctively that it was not good for me. But because of my lack of desire to participate in the way the general population thinks/acts I feel utterly alone.

I so wish some days that I too could not see what I see and feel. The sadness, the anger, the judgement, the overwhelming selfishness of the world. I know that others are doing the best they can, but I don't feel as though I can be or rather that I am a part of it. Therefore I often feel very alone.

Perhaps I need to focus on connecting to source; has anyone here have similar experience? What have you done that helps? I have 2 days off, with no responsibilities; so I believe I will meditate and potentially make another attempt to attend that spiritual community I am so disconnected from. or perhaps not...I am seeking guidance...any would be helpful.


updated by @kaolin: 02/28/17 09:34:42PM
Kaolin
@kaolin
02/11/16 04:42:01AM
28 posts

Exhaustion


Empath

Hello Sarah~ The world of work can be extremely exhausting for me also. I have had a very similar experience recently and I will share with you what has worked for me.

I was working a <30 hours a week at a job for about 2 years; I worked in my own classroom and had only 3 other colleagues in my office. It worked great for me, except I couldn't live off the pay. So I had to look for more. For the last 8 months I've been working 2 jobs, and 40 hours + a week with over 20+ other staff. The first few months I was toast at the end of the day. Very much like you described. So, I had to figure out what I was going to do.

First I had to accept that I'm not like these other 'earth' people who live to work. I have to have very clear balance in my life. So, I started to meditate daily; this has been essential. It helps me balance; I also thought I needed to learn 'shielding' but what I've discovered is that 'shielding' is just as exhausting for me as being completely open. So I found meditations that helped me align my energies, and open my heart without absorbing other peoples energy.

I also started taking BACH Flower remedies that have seemed to do wonders.

Last but not least sometimes I have forced myself to do things I don't want to do; like go for a walk when I'm exhausted and feel like my feet can't carry me I go anyway. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But I try. I've also heard, but don't practice well, eating well, trying to eat less processed foods; not my strong suit.

I know that you will find what works best for you; if that means less hours, or a different line of work; that might be an option; or it might mean finding a balance.
I know the essential part for me has been meditation.
Be well.

Kaolin
@kaolin
02/09/16 07:08:35PM
28 posts

Dream Perdictions


Dreams

Thank you Karen ~ your comments are appreciated. I really feel no fear or malice when I am with him. The only thing at all that I picked up on was that there was something about the coworker he was with; as though the coworker and I were suppose to connect in some way. The coworker was not flirtatious or overt in any way; and it would have been totally inappropriate if he had been. But I will certainly have a heightened awareness if I run into the guy from my dreams again.

Kaolin
@kaolin
02/09/16 06:43:40PM
28 posts

Dream Perdictions


Dreams

Hello~

I'm new to this group and fairly new to this site; I'm posting because I'm curious if an experience I had is a common occurrence and just something that I'll have to get use to.

Recently I've accepted my path as an empath; I've known for awhile, but tried to ignore it; like it wasn't an important aspect of myself. I've recently realized that isn't really an option.

Since this acceptance I have started to remember my dreams more frequently.

I don't recall ever remembering my dreams; it was rare VERY rare that I would recall my dream world. Until now.

I have had vivid dreams almost nightly, some more strongly then others. 2 situations in particular have gotten my attention.

First, is a recurring dream where a man appeared in my dreams for three nights in a row. This is a man I use to work with 5 years ago, and whom I have not seen in person in at least 6 months; we both occasionally attend the same spiritual group but rarely do we attend at the same location. I have nothing more then an acquaintance relationship with him. On the day after the third night of seeing him in my dream, he ended up at my work on a contract with his new position. He was there to only complete a day contract with his coworker; and nothing out of the ordinary occurred. It was odd. The dreams I had were neither positive or negative, but rather simply that he was in attendance. I am not frightened by him, nor exceptionally pleased when I see him; my feelings are rather neutral. I guess my question is, is this a common thing to predict; As I don't truly believe in coincidences what is this experience trying to tell me; can my dreams predict things that will happen...or tell me what might happen? It just seemed like an odd experience that I would like some experienced guidance on...if that's acceptable of course.

The other dream was one in which I would like some help in interpreting...but realizing as I type this, that I am not sure if that is what this group is for. So perhaps before I seek assistance in interpreting I will glance at the groups other posts; or if anyone can clarify if it's ok to ask for that kind of help here. Thank you in advance for your help.


updated by @kaolin: 02/23/17 10:26:49PM
Kaolin
@kaolin
02/07/16 01:46:08PM
28 posts

Not sure whether I am an empath or just a depressive.


Empath

What a great motto...I also believe that we are here to grow and learn and to be the best version of ourselves. I am often confused by what other people believe is there purpose here. I have taken up the habit that when something in my life is causing me pain or discomfort, I tend to look at myself...eventually. (After I allow the initial anger/disappointment/sadness go through me) Apparently the idea of look at one self is a foreign concept to a lot of people...and that's ok...it just confuses me.

I will check out the Enneagram typing ...thank you for the suggestion.

Kaolin
@kaolin
02/07/16 01:33:56PM
28 posts

Empath with Children


Empath

Wow...thanks Karen...I often question my parenting...thank you for the kind words. Doing the best I can~ just as everyone! :) <3

Kaolin
@kaolin
02/07/16 01:24:20PM
28 posts

Not sure whether I am an empath or just a depressive.


Empath

Cheshire Cat~

Thank you so much for posting this! I too have been called a 'do gooder' and most people struggle with my ability to be compassionate to all and also feel that I make them feel like they're not good enough. Although I too have asked if I come off as a know it all and that doesn't seem to be the case. It's more like I make them feel bad for not trying harder, even though I don't insist in anyway that they should. I know everyone has their own journey and experiences to have.

I have just recently had a realization about these types of challenges with my friendships. I have very few friends and the ones I do have, have a real understanding of me which I appreciate. I too can not handle discussions about the weather, or what is known as 'small talk' and often struggle in these types of basic social exchanges. I often go to the heart of the matter with people, and am learning how to do this with tact or simply keep quiet. A colleague of mine was kind enough to say once that I often point out things that people aren't yet ready to be made aware of. I appreciated her honesty and because of that statement I have learned to be more discerning about my contribution to conversations. (But don't always get it right) I want to say thank you for this post because I suddenly don't feel so alone anymore; I always feel like I don't quite fit in with the rest of the human race...and perhaps it's just a more selective few people that I fit in with. Thank you again

Kaolin
@kaolin
02/01/16 05:55:39AM
28 posts

Empath with Children


Empath

Again thank you both for your insights and trying to help - it is appreciated - I could sage more and be more diligent with meditation practice with my kids - and yes I am attempting to lessen the stress for all of us by looking for more tools.
Kaolin
@kaolin
01/31/16 04:32:54AM
28 posts

Pain changing forms? Is this possible ?


Empath

Just because...

Kaolin
@kaolin
01/31/16 03:43:01AM
28 posts

Empath with Children


Empath

Snap~ I left their father for very specific reasons including emotional, mental and financial abuse. Therefore to approachhim in changing custody arrangements is not something I am planning on doing any time soon. These forms of abuseare not things courts yetconsider issues and not something easy to prove. I work in the VAW field and these are not 'assumptions'; courts do not consider these serious issues and honestly I do not have the strength yet to pursue that. He is not a man that would discuss other arrangements.

I did not post this to request suggestions on how to change the custody situation but rather I was asking for experience on how to best help the children and myself handle the different energies that affect us. (such as your first reply snap)

I understand that you are all trying to help and thank you for that.

Kaolin
@kaolin
01/30/16 05:18:43AM
28 posts

Empath with Children


Empath

I left their father 6 years ago, this is not a new arrangement.It would be exceptionally difficultin family court to changethe custody agreement at this point since it has been 'working' so far. I have spoken to the kids, and they are learning to adjust. It is not easy, ever when there istwo different households, but I see my job as to give them the skills needed to adjust. Thank you for your concern.

Kaolin
@kaolin
01/29/16 03:43:53AM
28 posts

Empath with Children


Empath

Yes that's the current arrangement; one week with me the next with dad. Their household is dry different then ours, a lot more people (step.mom and her two kids) and very busy and loud. I do my best to have a more quiet and calm house - I need that.
Kaolin
@kaolin
01/27/16 07:01:06PM
28 posts

Empath with Children


Empath

I have two children whom I share custody with their father on a week by week basis.

I left their father about 6 years ago, and have been steadily growing healthier since then.
I have only recently come about accepting this gift, and have now discovered a lot of things make a lot more sense.

My children are 10 & 12 now, but I recall when they were babies that I struggled whenever they cried, I would actually cringe at their sadness or pain. I use to think that there was something "wrong" with me, or that I was a bad mother; but now it makes sense.
Now that they're older, and hitting the wonderful stages of puberty, I am aware that when they are over loaded with emotions that if I don't ground myself and be careful not to take on their emotions it can quickly escalate; In the past I ended up being just as angry/sad/mad as they were, now I know that I was just picking up their stuff and I am able to support them a little better by not being taken in by their emotions.

However, when they come back from dads, there always seems to be a detox period, especially for my 10 year old daughter. She usually has an emotional out burst in the first hour of being home which includes crying, screaming and slamming doors. I allow her to be emotionally I burn sage, hug her and then she usually relaxes.

My question is, what are some things you've learned that have worked when living with other people? (especially children) I have taught them mediation, grounding (ever since they were little I've asked them to feel their feet to help them ground) and we often go to the local shop to get them whatever crystals they're drawn to.

I do feel that I have done some damage to my children because while I was with their dad I was often unhinged, ungrounded and raged. I know now that wasn't all mine but it was my responsibility and now I am attempting to help my kids heal along with myself. Not an easy task so far. Any experience or helpful hints are welcome. Thank you in advance.


updated by @kaolin: 01/11/17 06:12:49PM
Kaolin
@kaolin
01/18/16 07:34:32PM
28 posts



I was surprised and excited the first time a client expressed her empathic ability - however my coworkers just figured she was mentally ill; I have to be careful and often forget myself when I'm not around like minded people. There are more and more people showing these traits - and I believe eventually it will normalize; just as everything else- but it is lovely to have a safe haven here! This community has really been a life saver-
Kaolin
@kaolin
01/18/16 06:54:32AM
28 posts



Elian~It is very difficult to watch an active alcoholic destroy his life.
I have been working with alcoholics for over 10 years and it is a challenge to not feel their pain since it is usually so great.

Sounds to me like you were attempting to practice loving detachment; setting boundaries while still offering love and support. Not easy.

I would like to offer a bit of an insight; some thing you may not know; you might be aware of this and if so then keeping it at the forefront of your mind might make it easier to set further boundaries;

It does not surprise me that his drinking has increased since his fathers death; for people who use drugs and alcohol it is their copping mechanism; it is what they know works to help deal with all the pain they are experiencing regardless of the harm they are doing to others; because their pain is so great; They do not know or believe their is any other way to deal with the anguish, pain, trauma they are feeling. Drinking is their solution not a problem; (they may also not be conscious of this)

I do not mean to imply that you should keep him in your life or stayed attached; actually quite the opposite; Until he finds that his behavior causes repercussions that out way the benefits to his drinking, he will not stop.

I don't know if this is appropriate, but I find Melody Beatty's work is a wonderful source of practical information on how to best deal with issues arising form loving someone who uses alcohol/drugs to manage. She is an author and has many books out that you might find helpful.

I hope this is helpful; supporting an alcoholic can be painful and exhausting, I hope you are taking care of yourself.

Kaolin
@kaolin
01/18/16 06:33:29AM
28 posts

Empath Attachment to Negative People


Empath

Hi Pinksun~

I identify with this. Because of my skill I always seem to find compassion for those people that others seem to easily cut out of their lives. I see that they are hurting not that they are 'bad' people. The problem for me isn't offering compassion, but being 'sucked' into their drama and feeling compelled to 'help' even to my own determent. I have heard that meditating on cutting the cord of attachment is helpful, (I tried a visualization mediation yesterday for just this purpose)

Asking for assistance from my guides and practicing grounding when I am in their presence and repeating "not mine" has also been helpful. Acknowledging that I am not responsible for their stuff has also helped.

Just to be clear I too am just learning these skills, but so far these are the things I have found helpful.

Kaolin
@kaolin
01/17/16 06:37:53AM
28 posts

Enegy flow


Empath

Thankyou all for your replies and yes they are helpful. I vet the sense that with time and practice I will become beer equipped to discern between my stuff and others.I do find I need to be gentle and patient with myself. Alllowing myself the time to learn and develop the skills - so thankyou all for your support
Kaolin
@kaolin
01/17/16 06:28:17AM
28 posts



Because of your post John today I will be attempting to cut the nergic ties with my ex - I haven't tried that before but I'm seeing from your experience it could be helpful.I got the sense that you don't fear her, but rather you were picking up her fear. She sounds like someone who is struggling greatly; you are an example to be able to practice such compassion with her, something I'm still working on with my ex.
Kaolin
@kaolin
01/16/16 05:47:39PM
28 posts



Thank you for sharing this.

I often experience similar symptoms when dealing with my children's father.

While we were together I experienced severe migraines on a regular basis, since I left him, I rarely get headaches.

I might be way off, but I am receiving an inclination to ask, could what she's sending your way be fear? Not really clear on fear of what, but I know that with my ex we both harbored a great amount of fear towards each other; (for various reasons) mostly fear that we were going to hurt each other; as time goes on that fear has lessened ..(not fully gone, but minimized)

Kaolin
@kaolin
01/16/16 05:14:44PM
28 posts

Enegy flow


Empath

As someone who is just learning to live consciously as an empath, I am curious how others experience the flow of energy.

Let me be more specific.

I did a yoga practice today, the first in months; through out the practice I burped frequently; I have always belched uncontrollably during yoga~ now I am aware (or believe) it is the flow and shift in energy, and it's my body extracting energy from my body that isn't mine. I use to go to Yoga classes a few years ago at a studio, but stopped going after one class where I almost threw up during the class form so much belching. (There was a woman next to me in class who I got a strong anger energy from....but thought I was imagining it)

This has happened also after I've attended staff meetings with a variety of people, often when unexpressed emotions are in the room.

Does anyone else experience this or something similar?Is this common?

I have also experienced severe headaches seemingly out of nowhere; Like this morning, I got a jabbing sensation in my fore head and then aching in the back of my head and neck and shoulders. I was home alone, and shortly after the pain started I received a text form a man I am attempting to cut out of my life. Could the headache have been from him? (Our relationship is tenuous at best)

How can one tell if the body aches/head aches/belching are from some other energy source then my own? Is meditation and focus the best practice to learn what is mine and what is others?

What practices have you found helpful to help with the belching; it's often embarrassing and I am not really able to restrain it, (and honestly don't really want to) I find it is one way to 'let go' of what's not mine.

I do now use a 'key hole' visualization prior to staff meetings, and that has helped.

Any other ideas or experiences would be greatly appreciated.

I started yoga again today in hopes of learning how to discern between other energies and my own....I'm hoping it will work...


updated by @kaolin: 01/21/17 07:54:32AM
Kaolin
@kaolin
01/08/16 11:48:57AM
28 posts

New Member


Empath

Thanks so much, it's nice to hear that I'm not alone.

I was just browsing online for a book that would help!
I am also have a reiki treatment booked for next week...much needed.

These online communities are a big help.

Kaolin
@kaolin
01/08/16 06:25:16AM
28 posts

So this is where I get to introduce myself...


Empath

Thank you for the welcoming and validating messages! It does feel like a big deal to acknowledge and learn how to integrate this ability into my life. Right now it feels like my mantra is "I am not crazy, this is my reality." This is the first time in a long time that I have felt that I have found something that resonates so much truth for me.

Kaolin
@kaolin
01/08/16 06:07:04AM
28 posts



Nice to see fellow Canadians here...I'm in Ontario...North of Toronto.

Kaolin
@kaolin
01/06/16 09:47:35PM
28 posts

So this is where I get to introduce myself...


Empath

So hi...I introduced myself already on the main forum but I wanted to introduce myself here also.

I am a 42 year old woman who has had some awareness about being an empathy for some time, but Iam really just starting to learn and integrate what I've learned into my life.

It's a scary thing, being aware of peoples energies and it can be very overwhelming.

I think I'm a bit angry too, because if I had only known sooner, paid attention sooner, used the tools I was given years ago when Ifirst learned about them, I would have saved myself a lot of pain and hardship. I know we all have our ownpath, and it took me what it took me to get here...and I can move on from here now... still irks me though.

I'm looking forward to seeing where this new acceptance will take me.

I wonder, did any other newcomers have a sense of relief when they found and joined this community? I literally felt a wave of relief and relaxation like my guides tossed a blanket of light and love over meand to congratulated me on my find! Ok...now I never thought I'd write something like THAT!!!! ;)


updated by @kaolin: 02/23/17 09:24:44AM
Kaolin
@kaolin
01/06/16 09:40:07PM
28 posts

Chakras, Reiki, Spiritual, Empath?


Empath

Hi~

Thank you for sharing! I too am new to the group...(just joined today) and am very glad to have read your post.

I've experienced a journey some what similar, and am currently also having those same..."am I just crazy?" thoughts.(But really knowing deep down that I'm not)

I also identify with the desire to want to tame it and not have it control my thoughts.

So again, just wanted to say thanks...& I hear ya! <3

KQ

Kaolin
@kaolin
01/06/16 06:48:18PM
28 posts

Empath and single


Empath

"That sees the world like I see it... And doesnt judge me when I live my emotions authenticly and not like a robot society tells us to be..."

Thank you for posting this.
It's nice to know that I'm not the only one struggling with feeling alone, and having few (if any) people who can identify with these experiences. thank you.

Kaolin
@kaolin
01/06/16 04:29:12PM
28 posts

New Member


Empath

Hello ~ I have known that I am an empath for a few years, however have not, until recently, fully embraced the gift. Now that I have, I am realizing that these abilities are much stronger then I realized, and I have to admit I am overwhelmed, scared, nervous and unsure of myself. I also feel very alone. I have had moments of clarity where I simply know that this is what I am, but damn...it can be intense!

I have been told in the past of these abilities, but was unwilling (or unable) to accept them. Now that I have and as I learn more, I feel the need to connect to others who understand and can offer support.

I seem to need to connect to others like me, however I live in an exceptionally small community in Canada, and there is a limited community of people who I would trust to share this experience with. Thank goodness for the internet! I am grateful to have located you all!

I wanted to just stop by and say hello, share a bit and say thank you for being here. I look forward to growing and learning within this community.

<3


updated by @kaolin: 05/13/17 04:53:56PM