Forum Activity for @lindseyann

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
12/31/15 08:01:40AM
15 posts

Autism spectrum disorders and empathy connection?


Empath

I have also wondered this lately, as my family, mostly all seem to have 'empath' characteristics. As a teacher, I am aware of autistic spectrum traits and a lot of them are the same. Someone who is autistic thoughwill not look you in the eyes normally when they are speaking to you. If you are an autistic that is lower on the spectrum then you are more socially aware and can look at people when you speak. So I would say that most of the characteristics are the same apart from a few. I have worked with autistics and there are other things that factor in that I would say wouldn't with most of us, as they are very child-like and you can tell in their speech and writing. All my family (one side - daughter, mother, gran, aunt, great-gran etc) all have phobias, panic attacks, social anxieties, heart problems, stomach issues, as well as all the other 'empath' characteristics.

Not sure about the 'toxin' theory but I do know that there are a lot of people who have been diagnosed with ADD/ADHD and who were on medication who are not anymore, who are also symptom free, as they were tested for food allergies and once they stayed away from these foods, they didn't have the ADHD symptoms. I am one of many who look at vaccines as a possible cause for a lot of chronic illness today, as they are on the rise and have surpassed the rate at which scientists can say that it is genetic - it is something environmental, that you have put in to your body, or are exposed to.My daughter has type 1 diabetes and no-one else has this in our family, but they tell you at diagnosis that it is genetic. There are some doctors who believe type 1 diabetes has come about through that personnot being able to digest milk/dairy properly and the link that countries/people who don't tend to eat dairy also don't have these illness - which is true if you look in to it. The country that has the most type 1 diabetics per capitais Finland and they are also the most dairy consuming country. Asian countries have low a low instance of type 1 diabetes and they don't consume dairy as a whole. Interesting isn't it. I have a nutritionist friend who believes in the Blood Type diet and she showed me what I should and shouldn't be eating, according to my blood type. It was correct in that all the foods that I know irritate my stomach were on the not to eat list. Foods do play such a large part in things but its hard to change and its also not something most doctors understand either - its easier to prescribe medication.

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
12/31/15 07:28:14AM
15 posts



have sent you friend request, as I would like to reply to this message with my own experience I have been going through, as its very similar, but would rather in a message, if that's ok.

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
12/19/15 12:01:54PM
15 posts

I Want Everyone's Intuition On This


Empath

I used to refer to my husband as having a Jekyll and Hyde personality - he can be very nice, generous, loving etc but when something triggers anger he can be mean, cruel, foul mouthed and abusive. He has never been physically abusive but the words that come out are very abusive. One of my husbands triggers is when he is driving on the highway and another driver is too close or someone in front is too slow - my husband starts to get anxious, then irritated, then angry and then he starts to drive recklessly and I feel that he is kind of in his own zone at the time and the anger has taken over and doesn't even consider that we are in the vehicle with him at all. He has stopped the car before, got out, threatened people, rolls the windows down and cusses and yells, whilst swerving through traffic, going up to dangerous speeds - I can go on and on. He has even driven over medians and driven on the sidewalk before as he felt penned in and wanted to get out of the traffic he was in. I read an article about Driving on the Highway and how it brings out peoples symptoms, if they are bipolar or have other mood/behavior disorders etc.

I understand that your Mom doesn't want to split the family unit up - this is why I stayed and left and came back again. But I have an understanding that this is not my fault, or anybody else's fault, it is my husbands condition and I won't take the abusive behavior. Very few of them seek medical help and most don't ever see themselves for who they are. I have been lucky in the fact that my husband works shifts, so we are on our own most of the time, but the atmosphere changes and is negative when he is off and arguments start. He even does things on purpose I think to start arguments or get a reaction from me - they like to stir trouble. My husbands family are mostly like this and I refused to spend Thanksgiving with them and we are not going at Christmas - before I would go and endure it, but no not anymore. The other thing is that even if he is not bipolar, he has been brought up in an environment that is toxic and abusive and this is learned behavior that I thought you can change in someone, but you cannot. I teach children and have studied Child Psychology and unfortunately people can get help to adjust things about themselves, but your childhood environment is key to being a healthy normal individual and if you are abused and neglected you are going to greatly affected.

You and your Mom need to put yourselves first, because your Dad is not going to - not because he doesn'tlove you but because something else is coming between him and your relationship being a normal, healthy one.Do what is best for you both. I am ok with having to leave again and have told my husband I am not happy with him and he knows that I will leave this nextyear (finances are the issue, or I would have left already) and you also have to make the decision to not be a martyr to your Dad's condition and put it in his hands to deal with, even if it means he gets worse.

Best of wishes and hope you have some support,

Lindsey

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
12/12/15 10:53:42AM
15 posts

I Want Everyone's Intuition On This


Empath

My husband has been like this over the years and he came from an environment that was physically abusive at times, and definitely emotionally abusive. Several of his siblings were diagnosed with bipolar and I have felt for years that he has t his also, but will not seek medical attention. I left for3 years and came back, but sadly things don't change and people like this often don't see their own symptoms/behavior and always put the blame on others. They can be deceitful and secretive. My husband has gone really mean things and then months/years later when he mentions why I don't trust him fully or respect him, I mention these things and he says that they are in the past and I should've forgotten them - but there's always a next time whether it is next week or next month. Sorry you are going through this and you probably know if you think he needs to seek medical attention for a mental health issue possibly/disorder.

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
12/12/15 10:46:02AM
15 posts

overwhelmed by negative emotions at work (aka help!)


Empath

I lived in Kensington (off Kensington Highstreet) when I was at college in London. I went to the Montessori Centre International that is opposite Selfridges (Balderton St) - so am used to London and how it can sometimes get you down because of the fast pace, people are too busy and often rude etc, but I did love the cultural aspects. When I was in the UK last, for 3 years, my daughter and I used to travel down to London regularly, as we like musicals and usually stayed at a Travelodge for a few days.

I am from Middlesbrough, which is near the coast and Yorkshire countryside and I miss that terribly here in the US and the freedom of being able to go places I like. So I do understand. When in London though I used to like to sit in a park or go to the library/museum to soak in some calm.

Take care,

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
12/11/15 04:52:14PM
15 posts

overwhelmed by negative emotions at work (aka help!)


Empath

So sorry to hear that you are going through this at work. Make a list of all the things you like do and treat yourself everyday to something that you like, even if its a bubble bath, a bar of chocolate your favourite TV and do things for yourself to help build your self confidence. Also, list the things that you can do and are good at and maybe you can think of another job you can apply to where you might be happier. Is it the job itself or just the environment? A negative and pressurized environment will get you down even though you may love the job itself.

Oh just seen that The Dreamer suggested some of the same things - great minds think alike.

Are you in to herbal essences? - I don't have enough knowledge but getting some that you can use to calm yourself either by putting some on a hanky and sniffing it now and again and spraying it around your area at work or on your clothes could also help. Lavender helps me. Also some yoga positions may help with stress and help balance you out a bit as well as walking,

Hope your situation changes for you soon, so sorry you feel this way

Where are you in the UK again?

Lindsey

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
12/03/15 03:44:15PM
15 posts

Want to introduce myself.


Empath

thanks for the reply and friendship

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
12/02/15 03:30:07PM
15 posts

Any UK Groups or people from the UK?


Empath

like Manchester - haven't been in years.

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
12/01/15 03:56:45PM
15 posts

Any UK Groups or people from the UK?


Empath

It has got cold here the last few days, everyone is wrapped up like an eskimo and I'm walking around with no coat on yet,

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
12/01/15 03:56:09PM
15 posts

Any UK Groups or people from the UK?


Empath

I have lived in the US for many years with visits back to the UK in between. I am a Montessori teacher and came out here when I was 23 on a work visa, married, went back for 18 months came back here (Texas) for 12 years and then back to the UK for 3 and back again this last year. I have pinponged across the ocean a few times (as it is called in the expat community). I am British at heart, have never settled in the US and will most likely return for good this next year. It was all exciting to move when I was younger but roots, family and feels right is what is important to me now. After being in the UK for 3 years, returning here has been harder this time around and I miss the UK more.

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
11/30/15 03:07:20PM
15 posts

Any UK Groups or people from the UK?


Empath

Hi, please to meet you.

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
11/29/15 11:03:20AM
15 posts

Want to introduce myself.


Empath

Thanks for the reply. It is nice to know that there are other people who are experiencing the same things as you and understand.

Lindsey

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
11/29/15 10:57:16AM
15 posts

Any UK Groups or people from the UK?


Empath

Hi, where are you in the UK? I am from Middlesbrough, North Yorkshire. I live in Texas at the moment and have for many years, with visits back to the UK now and again.

LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
11/28/15 11:35:24AM
15 posts

Want to introduce myself.


Empath

I wanted to introduce myself as I am new to all this and also get some feedback, as I am still questioning things and only came to the possible conclusion that I could be an empath because of some recent articles I have read that drew my attention to myself.

Hi, I am Lindsey. From England (Yorkshire) originally but am living in Texas at the moment. I have always felt kind of out of sorts and uncomfortable and couldn't really explain why I felt that way or what was wrong. My family (my teenage daughter, mother, aunt, grandmother and my cousins) all have very similar traits as myself, some to deeper degrees, so this must be a family thing as well. I am 44 years old and now just really realizing some things about myself - I think that is normal for most people as you mature and come to terms with some things. I have always had a love for nature, animals, the outdoors and solitude. I love to read and learn and get very bored when I am not challenged or learning - my husband says that I ask why all the time and need to know things. I am a Montessori Teacher (work with 3-6 year olds) and have always been drawn to children, animals, causes, charities, volunteering, caring about things etc, more than the average person does. I like to be involved with community projects, not just things that are for myself. I have always been very overly emotional and have always felt compelled to help other people.

When something distressing is on the news I find that I cry easily and then whatever it is plays on my mind all day and it bothers me that I can't do anything about it. Don't like to see cruelty to any living thing.From being young some things bothered and distressed me but they didn't seem to bother others - I never liked unreal characters on the television (Wizard of Oz, ET, Aliens, Charlie and the chocolate factory)and to this day cannot watch anything science fiction, horror or anything where there is violence. Even documentaries about real life situations that are horrific, like the holocaust upset me to a degree that I can't sleep after watching them and theydistress me. As a child (and still now) I didn't like the circus, especially clowns, loud music, crowded places, fireworks, bright lights and disco type lights etc. I have a sensitive digestive and nervous system.

I don't take medications as everything seems to react to me or I don't like how it makes me feel. My daughter was born naturally, as I didn't like the gas and air and after surgeries I haven't been able to take the pain medicine, even allergy medicine makes me act strange. I cannot wear anything but gold earrings as I am allergic, and have sensitivities to other things and certain foods. Alcohol isn't a good choice for me as only a small amount makes me tipsy. I have always been more aware of things than others around me - I can smell a gas leak hours or days before others, hear things others can't, more observantand remember details others cannot. Strong smells like perfumes/soaps/chemicals irritate me and give me headaches and I can smell them before anyone else. My family and I also have a variety of phobias (claustrophobia, heights, driving on the highway etc)and seem to suffer from anxiety.

I am a calm person, I don't like arguing, raised voices, anger etc. I am a teacher and even other teachers tell me how unusually calm and patient I am - I think this is why I have become a Montessori Teacher and am also drawn to peace and peaceful situations. The one area I have a challenge asteacher with, is being honest - I am too honest apparently and have got in trouble for telling a parent something that I feel they should know, whereas other teachers wouldn't say anything. I have issues with most people - meaning I have issues with their behavior, I don't like deceitful people or people who lie easily. I can tell when I am being lied to and even though I cannot say at that time what it may be they are lying about or doing that is deceitful, it comes out later and I was right. I have a good intuition about people and often others tell me that I was right all along about someone. At work I seem to be the person that everyone else comes to when they have problems or they need to talk and then I end up being a go between letting my Directors know about things that they don't notice orneed to know about.

I have been married for 18 years and I have to say that myself and my husband are opposites and its got to a point where a lot of things I cannot tolerate and I will probably end up leaving.I met my husband when I was here in the US workingand we married (probably too quickly) and I was very nave at the time and didn't ask enough questions and didn't get to know him like I should have first. Long story short, it wasn't long before I became pregnant before we married and even though I knew he was not really the one for me and I saw some things that bothered me, I married him anyway - fear I think of doing things on my own and I also believed that he would change and be more responsible. Anyway, I have kind of struggled through and have tolerated things that most others wouldn't have - he has anger issues, poor impulse control, has gambled and lied about things and he wonders why I don't fully trust him. He has siblings and a parent who are bipolar and I have felt for many years that he was also (this was before the others were diagnosed). He can bevery negative, putshimself first,I could go on and on.Myself and my daughter went back to England for 3 years and it was like my personality started to return, I felt free and able to do things that made me happy. I had lived here in Texas for 12 years but didn't really fit in here, was more used to the English way of life, didn't drive, liked train travel, being by the coast and countryside etc and missed all of that. Well, the job situation was not good in England I decided to come back, and convinced myself that things would be ok and that maybe I had exaggerated things a bit and maybe things weren't as bad. I have been back here with my husband for a 18 months and have been very unhappy and have bouts of depression because I am in surroundings I don't care for. It is a nice area, but I like the freedom to walk and to use public transport and to travel around. I miss the ocean and all of my interests are mainly historical/cultural that are not here, so I have been feeling like a bird in a cage. I like to travel and experience new things and I feel restrained here. I understand the need for routine and rules but like to break free now and again and just go off and do things for the weekend, pack my bag and jump on the train to visit a new place. Here I have to get in the car all the time, which others say is freedom and a privilege, but I don't feel that way - I feel that having to rely on a car all the time is not freedom at all.

My interests have always been in historical things - I like to visit castles, cathedrals, ancient ruins etc. I do like cities like London, Paris etc for cultural, historical reasons but don't care for the crowds and have to findpeaceful places like parks or gardens to visit in between. Literature and history are my main interests along with music and the theatre. Have always beendrawn to celticthings andlike to learn about medieval and ancient times.I am a Christian and have always been drawn to religious and spiritual things - have tried several different denominations but I have always been drawn to some pagan things, as I love nature as well as things from other religions as well.The religiosity and peoples rules have put me off going to achurch as such.I have always felt out of place in this time period, like some of my family also. I am competent with technology but don't really like it (would rather not have it)and like simpler things and a simple way of life. I am not into possessions at all and hate to shop and spend money. I am more interested in experiences and learning, than owning things. I also cannot understand religious people here who hunt animals - my husbands family are all fundamental Christians who like to hunt and to me it is profoundly wrong to hunt an animal unless you are needing food and cannot get anything anywhere else.

These are some of things I experience amongst many others. The only thing I disagreed with on the articles about Empaths, that I have read was about antiques. I like antiques and have always enjoyed looking around antique stores and finding old books, unique things etc and this has not really bothered me, as I am very nostalgic and long really to be in a different time and place. The 1940's England would have been an era I would have felt more comfortable in or going back a few hundred years. I feel that today there is a lot of negative influences and things going on in the world that I can't relate to or dislike and that I try to get away from.

Thanks for listening, I rambled on a bit more than I was going to.


updated by @lindseyann: 01/20/17 12:47:39AM
LindseyAnn
@lindseyann
11/28/15 09:14:54AM
15 posts

Any UK Groups or people from the UK?


Empath

Hi I am new to this community and am English, but live in Texas at the moment, but am interested to know if there are any groups from the UK. I have searched the discussions and there was one group but the discussions are years old and I cannot find the group anymore.


updated by @lindseyann: 01/22/17 07:14:46AM