Psychic Development Workshop: Keeping Confidences
Psychic and Paranormal
Thanks, April! I've been too busy to do much with it lately, but if you have any suggestions for improvements, please let me know!
I'm sort of in agreement with this interpretation. Another thought I had was... Do you sleep next to someone at night? Maybe you're seeing that person's past lives? Or the past lives of someone else in your household? This doesn't happen to me, so I'm just guessing, but when I'm awake I'll sometimes have random visions of other people's past lives like that, just short snippets of things when I'm around them.
It's been a long while since your request, so I hope you're still around. I've been working like crazy all summer, but things have calmed down enough that Ihope todevote some time to doing some readings here and there through the fall. I'm going to skip trying to look at your page - it's probably out of date for what you're going through now anyway -and just jump in and see what comes up. Here's your reading:
Okay, this might be a little weird. I'm just going to type it as I get it and hope that it makes sense later. I am getting you not on Earth. I'm getting a spaceship, surrounded by lots of black space. Quiet black space. It's very quiet. I'm trying to figure out who you are and what your job is aboard this vessel. Okay, I think my problem is that the first thing I'm trying to figure out is what gender you are in this lifetime, and the species that you are doesn't have clearly-defined genders like humans have. Or maybe it's that there are more than two genders? Either way, I am going to skip that part.
Your job aboard this vessel. That one I can probably figure out. Okay, your job is science. You do experiments. Your experiments involve living tissues and certain types of radiation. You are intersted in how cells mutate, the defining characteristics of cellular structures and how they are affected by things like light, heat, and radiation that exists in certain areas of the universe, especially the areas of the universe that they (your species) think that life comes from - stellar nurseries and such. You particularly like a certain type of green plant for your experiments, because the leaves highly morphogenic, meaning that they change clearly and rapidly to adapt to different environments.
Is there anyone else on board the vessel? Your family... There was a mate at one time. I'm not getting a clear sense of the timeframe. It seems like there's no one else on board the vessel at this time, but maybe there was once, or will be again? No, okay, there was once. I'm also getting a child that there was once. What happened to the family? I'm getting that they're gone, but not what caused them to be gone. Okay, I'm pushing against a block and getting some emotional pain.... Pushing through...
Something to do with your mother. Your mate and child were with your mother at her house. There was an explosion of some kind, a malfunction in the city power system. It seems that they had combustible gas lines running under their homes, sort of like we have natural gas piping, but this gas was much more volatile. The city hadn't been maintaining the lines properly, and a crack opened, and boom! They were all gone.
It seems like this species deals with grief and loss differently than humans, or at least that was the societal expectation, that death is just a part of life, and that as with most things in the society, it is viewed dispassionately and somewhat scientifically. You were never quite satisfied with this approach, though, and you retreated to the solitude of space so that you would not have to watch people watching you and your grief.
Okay, I'm fast-forwarding to your death now. I'm not sure how it happens, but somehow you run out of oxygen on your spaceship (yes, apparently this species is human-like enough that it breathes air like ours). You die wondering what will happen to you, if you'll see your loved ones again. Your species had given up myths about what happens after death a long time before, but you needed to believe in something after death. So you stayed, waiting for what would happen after death, not understanding that you were already dead.
I'm trying to get your attention now. I've transformed myself into a little girl of your species. I'm telling you that I've come to take you away from here, that you've died and it's time to go. You're fighting me because you want me to explain the afterlife first. It's hard because your species doesn't really follow the concept of the "soul". But I persist. Ah... Finally you cross over into the light.
Alrighty, that was it. I hope that made some kind of sense to you. Please feel free to pepper me with questions, how ever many you have!
Hi Fawhna, and thanks for your reply. I think that what you were picking up on has to do with me feeling a little overwhelmed with responsibilities lately. I have been dreaming of vacation, which is definitely a sort of freedom, so nice job!
It was the part where you were going into the tree and popping out somewhere else that made me think of the world tree. In my experience, the "shamanic journey" isn't nearly as mysterious or difficult as some writings on the subject may lead us to believe. The spirit guide meditation, the past life meditation, and the akashic record meditation in the workshop are all technically shamanic journeys of a sort.
Yes, I remembered about your stag. It sounds like this fox was probably the answer you were looking for, then, with your stag as a backup of sorts?
Wow! Thanks for sharing your experience, Keisa! I've always had a hard time understanding what "forgiveness" meant, or why it was important. The conclusion I finally came to was that forgiving is nothing more than recognizing that I wasn't to blame for the person's behavior toward me, and that it's notmy job to hold that person accountable for his/her actions (unless it IS my job, in which case I make every ethical and legal attempt to do so). It's liberating, when I can do it, which almost alwaystakes a cooling-off period first because I can getvery emotionalwhen people treat me badly. And sometimes, it's a process that I have to do a number of times before it really becomes a part of my normal everyday thinking. I'm crossing my fingers that the depression meds will soon be (if they're not already) something you don't need anymore!
Great to hear that you are journeying. My two cents is that the single tree you saw is your mind's representation of the shamanic world tree. You'll have to google that because it's way too much to try to explain right now. You might try starting withthis link and this one.
One thing I'd like to point out is that not every journey has some great meaning behind it thatmust be decoded. It's like howyou might go for a run but not be running a marathon,just because running is nice. Journeying is nice. It gives our brains exercise so that when we need to go journeying in search of something, we're used to what it feels like to do that. Our guides like to spend time having fun with us on these journeys, too. They love supporting us and giving us advice and all that, but they like having fun just doing things with us, too.
That being said, if your intention was indeed tojourney in search of something specific, it sounds like you maybe weren't being specific enough with your questions ahead of time and/or during the experience. If that's the case, reply back and we canbrainstorm some ways to get a better grip on what it is you're seeking.
Thanks for sharing such a great journey story!
Short answer? Yes.
Long answer? It depends what you mean by "break in meditation" and by "consequences". An unanticipatedbreak during meditation is problematic because the mind and body are not prepared for rapid action. It's sort of like taking those medications that warn not to operate heavy machinery while under the influence, and then trying to do something physically and mentally taxing. A person needs to come fully out of the sedatemeditational statebefore attempting normal activities.
A break from a meditational practice may have physical consequences also. Meditation does certain things to our body's chemistry, and taking a break from regular meditation sessionswould obviously cause a dissipation of those beneficial effects. Depending on lifestyle factors,such asdiet, exercise, stress, and sleep deprivation, these changes might be more pronounced in some.
Does that answer your question?
Haha! Yes!! All four of those are at the very top of my joy list. Nice job, and welcome!
Thanks for your response, Eric! It's taken me a long time to be able to accept that a person's worth and the worth of their behaviors is not the same, that I can simultaneously love someone and hate what they do. In my experience, learning this lesson is really important in life in general, but is crucial to being effective as a psychic reader/counselor/healer, because people generally seek out thistype of guidance when there's somethingin their lives that's bothering them. In those situations, it's necessary to be able to love the person completely, while at the same time recognizing thatachange must take place for them to be able to move forward.
Another good response to anger that I've found is that anger almost always arises when we desire to control something that we have no effective way to control. Other people's behavior, for example. We can't control what another person does, and that's frightening, which leads to anger. If we recognize that the reason we're angry is because we're reacting to our own lack of control, which we can't do anything about, then we can choose acceptance. After we accept the situation for what it is, we can choose a more effective way of dealing with the situation, because we're seeing it clearly. As a parent of a now 13-year-old, I find that I'm reminding myself of this truthoften.
Actually, no, at least not in real life. However, metaphorically, I do like both, if that makes sense. I have been noticing with these responses that they seem to be hitting on the things that are going on in my life at the moment, and when you posted this, I was at my new job, my second day. It's definitely going to be an uphill journeyfor me, climbing a metaphorical mountain in a lot of ways, but I'msooo joy-filledto be doing it! My new colleagues are amazing, and I feel very lucky to be having a chance for so much career growth right now. I'm thinking that this msut have been you were picking up on, so well done!
At this point, the course is completed, so you can jump in anywhere. I do recommend starting at Step 1, of course, because it's important to have that foundation there, but plenty of folks start with whichever lesson looks most interesting in the moment.
I don't spend much time here anymore - too much "life" stuff needing my attention - but I do respond to posts relating to the workshop, so comment all you want!
After reading your post here, I'm getting a strong feeling that there are a number of things going on with you that a "psychic" reading would bring some clarity to. If you'd like one, I invite you to send me a friend request and PM.
Since I won'tviolate your privacy by chatting with your spiritual advisory team without your permission, what I can offer are my personal opinions about what you've written here. The idea that there are "levels of consciousness" seems to be, for whatever reason, a common point of debate in spiritual circles. Theintellectual construct of thisthat rings most true for me is this one. I don't necessarily agree that the levels are all exactly correct, and the numbers mentioned are certainly incorrect, but the general idea of the levels seems to me to be mostly on the right track. The most helpful thing about it, to me, is the idea that a person can'tjump from "Reason" (let's assume that's where you are right now) directly to "Enlightenment" - it's necessary to go through the stages of "Love", "Joy", and "Peace" first. I encourage you to think about that for a bit and see if it adds something to your understanding of where you are on your spiritual path and where you want to go next.
I agree with Mayelin. What I generally see is that people have between one and three main guides that they work with most closely, and a number of other guides that are available to work on specific issues.Additional guides do come and go, like Mayelin described.
Great! Thanks for the feedback, Ginger!
Some of these back requests have gotten a little stale. I searched the profiles of everyone that had a pending request, and I will be deleting the requests of everyone without EC activity in 2012: Tempie, Karina Holten, Alicia, Rose/Angela Lee, Leslie Porter, Courtney, and Jami. If any of the deleted requests are still interested, please make a new post!
Thanks for your patience all,
Hi Ginger! Finally, my daughter's out of the house and the most pressing work is off my desk. It's your turn! Here's your reading:
What I'm getting is a place with a North African feel to it. I want to say that we're in Timbuktu during its golden era. I'm getting you as a young girl. There's something about flowers, and bread, and dates (the dried fruit). Nuts and oil and, is it charcoal? Fabrics and dried fish and birds in cages - some to eat and some for aviaries. It seems like a bazaar, but it's mostly covered, and it's not crowded. There's a young boy there, who works at one of the stalls. He sells, or rather he helps his father sell metalwork - small braziers for incense, mainly. Lots of different kinds. They look to me like bronze.
I'm not sure what I'm doing here. It feels like I'm in a big body, like a man's. I don't see you anywhere. Wait. You're with me in the market. The relationship feels a little like you're my serving girl, like I barely notice your existence except when I need you for something. I purchase a brazier from the boy. You are carrying our other purchases (the things I mentioned before, minus the live birds, but with some delicious cucumber salad for lunch).
I'm feeling like this is all very interesting, but that we need to get to the point here. What's next? Okay, so what I'm getting is that you grow up and stay as a servant in the scholar's household. It's not great, but not bad either. At least you get plenty of food, and the cook is good. You wish that you could learn to read and write like the boys that come around the house sometimes, but you don't really believe that you can do it, it seems so hard. What you feel like you can do, and really want to do, is art. You believe that you could do beautiful drawings, if only you had the time and tools. You'd make the time if you had paint and brushes and wood panels on which to paint.
One day when you're about 13 or 14, an older boy ayear or two older than you(an apprentice scholar from the college) comes to the house and comes upon you as you're drawing a picture in the garden dirt with a stick and rocks. He watches you draw for a short time from behind, so you can't see him and won't be forced to stop drawing. He is captivated by your passion and attention to your work. He eventually introduces himself to you, and you're immediately enamored of his kind eyes and melodious voice. He knows that there would be no future for a relationship between the two of you, but he can't stay away from you. He comes back to see you often, and encourages your art.
Over a period of years, maybe 5 or 6 years, the young man becomes the most important thing in your life, and when he leaves school and returns home, he cannot take you, and you are forced to part ways. Neither of you ever fully heal from the split, and spend your lives thinking about each other. Both of you have the idea that you will be reunited in death, and so when you die, you both stay on this side, looking for each other but never finding.
Okay, now I understand why I started out with the man. When he dies, he learns what has happened and what will happen, and he vows to help if he can. He's been waiting for someone like me, and wants to help the two of you get to where you're supposed to be. He has been feeling guilty all this time that you both have been in such pain. He leads me to the young man's spirit, and explains to him what has happened and what I'm doing there. The three of us then go in search of you. The man knows where you would have gone - a grove of trees not far from his house - and he goes there to find you. The young man and I wait at the edge of the trees. The two of you eventually emerge, you with a disbelieving, but daring to hope, look on your face. When you see your young man, you cry and cry and laugh and cry and laugh. The man gives you a hug around your shoulders, and walks with you the rest of the way to us. He introduces us, and you and the young man just look into each other's eyes for a long time. After a while, an angel of light appears with a blazing white chariot to carry you two across to the other side. The man follows behind on foot shortly afterward, after thanking me. I thank him profusely in return, and give my silent thanks to the angel that had appeared.
That's all I have for you today! Please let me know if you have any questions. I'd be interested to knowwhat impact this has onthe two of you over the next few weeks.
Hi Gracey! I'm not sure exactly what you mean, but I do definitely try to appreciate the little, simple things in life.
Meh. Looks like I'm going to have to be disappointing again. I'm sure I've mentioned it elsewhere, but I'm a single parent of a special-needs child, and, well, let's just say that today did not go well at all. You're at the top of the list for the next time I have acouple of hours free.
Hi Mayelin! I received your private message, so I'll respond there.
Perfect! Here's your reading:
I have a lot of trouble slipping into your past life, because the vibration of it is very low, very serious. I have to keep relaxing, and relaxing, and easing into it slowly. I can feel the pain coming, and I let it slowly build so as not to become overwhelmed by it. The pain is many-faceted - there's grief and rage and guilt and shame in it.
I'm seeing some terrain, some rocky cliffs, smell of the sea, forest at my back and scrubby bushes in my line of sight. There's a path that leads down a slope to the side ofa cliff, which rises up on right side. It's a small cliff. I think I could get to the top of it and look out over the ocean if I were to double back and take a different way.
I smell a cookfire, and my belly rumbles. I hurry along a little faster. I eventually come to a little cottage with earthen walls and a thatched roof. Smoke curls out of the chimney, which is made of stacked stone and some kind of mortar or mud. Inside the cottage, a young woman is baking bread, stirring a pot, and cutting greens and some kind of root vegetables. She is beautiful to my eyes. I love her. I look for our babies, and find one napping and the older one making a slobbery mess out of a stump of carrot. They're the best thing I've seen all day.
Reader Me is wondering what I'm doing here. The thought causes the pain to return, creeping in at the sides of my awareness. Part of me wants to know what the pain is about, and part of me wants to stay here in this idyllic scene, enjoying the wonderful dinner and my beautiful family. I then realize that the beautiful family is a trap, it's the trap that this soul aspect is stuck in. What happened was so awful that the soul cannot accept it and move on.
Reader Me decides to bite the bullet and try to see what happened, regardless of the pain that it will inevitably cause. The rage that I felt was female pain, and I'm in a male body right now, so that's off. I decide to see if I can escape the husband's body to talk to the wife. I still haven't seen her face. When I think about the wife's face, I see a dead face, a face of someone that was probably beaten to death. I probe for more information. After trying out various scenarios, I finally hit on something close enough that the real story pops into focus.
There's a lot of backstory to the band of raiders that were traveling through the forest on that fateful day. I get the feeling that you had some previous lives with one or more members of this particular group, and that you may have run into one of them during your current lifetime too. In any case, they chanced upon your husband when he was out fishing in the big stream that was nearest your house. For whatever reason, they thought that he had some gold stashed away somewhere, and they wanted it. But there was no gold. They beat himup and brought him back to your house, bloody and messed up. They figured that you, being a soft-hearted woman, would tell them where the gold was after you saw what they'd done to your husband. But there was no gold. They didn't believe you. They started tearing up the house, but they couldn't find anything of value, other than some hunting equipment and farming tools. They thought that your husband must have stashed it somewhere else. To get you to talk, they killed him in front of you.
Then you recognized one of them. It was a man that had been interested in you at one of the town festivals, but you thought him unkind, anddid not return his attention. He recognized you, too. You wondered if he had encouraged his violent group to your house on purpose, out of some sick revenge. In your grief for your husband, whom you loved very much, you lashed out. You insulted the man and his friends, insulted their manhood, their parentage, their intellect, and their choice of bed mates.
One of them was not amused by your insults, and picked up your baby and killed him. You really went nuts then, trying to hurt the two men that were holding you in any way you could. Then another one of them took your oldest and bashed her head in. By the time they started raping you and beating you, your soul was somewhere else. You were already gone, stuck in the memory of your husband's safe return from the forest in time for bread and stew.
Isuspect that dislodging you from your memory may be difficult, so I slip back into your husband's aspect, recognizingI started out there for a reason. I find you as you were at the moment of your death, and try to wake you from your sleep. I evenutally succeed and send you and the rest of your family into the light to cross over.
I find my thoughts returning to this guy that you recognized. I think that you know him now. Is he your ex-husband, maybe? If so, I get the impression that he's grown and changed since this lifetime that I just saw, but maybe not as much as might be desired.
Anyway, sorry that was so heavy. What I'm getting is that this lifetime was affecting your current lifetime in ways that you might be able to see right away, but in other, more subtle ways too. Specifically, regarding the subtle ways, if I'm getting this correctly, I think that you may have some digestive or kidney issues, and this lifetime is somehow tied to that. You may start seeing your health issue in a new way now.
Please let me know if you have any questions!
Drat. Sorry, Ginger. I got sidetracked and thought that I had already answered via private message, but anyhow, I apologize. I'll be able to do yours tomorrow. Thanks for your patience.
Same question for you:I'm not sure if you're still around; it looks like there hasn't been much activity from you in a while. If you're still interested in a past life reading, will you reply to this comment? I've been pretty swamped these last few months, but I'm hoping to have some time for readings here and there soon.
I'm not sure if you're still around; it looks like there hasn't been much activity from you in a while. If you're still interested in a past life reading, will you reply to this comment? I've been pretty swamped these last few months, but I'm hoping to have some time for readings here and there soon.
Ha ha! Wouldn't that be joyful! Yes! I'd love everyone to exist in peace and harmony.
Yes! It's the window that I love. It looks out onto a beautiful green courtyard with 60+ year old trees. I find it very serene and refreshing, especially in contrast to the sea of beige that surrounds my cubicle at work... :-D I'm glad that you're enjoying the exercises! Keep up the good work!
Hello and welcome! Yes, that's exactly what I meant.
Summer is absolutely my favorite time of year. I love the sun, and we have lots of trees here. Laughter is totally necessary to my mental health (and chocolate too, sometimes). I do like children and dogs in general, but only other people's. My daughter is difficult, and we have neither a dog nor a husband. However, I do have all of those, in a way, among my spirit guides - a child-like spirit, one that appears as a dog, and a main one that played a husband role inone of mypast lives. In another way, these three could also be examples of some of the things I value highly- a childlike attitude about life; loyalty and unconditional love; and loving, supporting, honoring, doing my duty for those in my life. I do love life and I do, on the bad days, remind myself that "this too will pass" (and hopefully soon!).
Sounds like you got some hits there! Thanks for participating!
Hi Sue! Based on your response, I think that you might be perceiving two similar things that aremushing together. I absolutely write for a living (reports, though, not anything fun like a novel, alas). I write at an office in a high-rise downtown office building during the weekdays, and also from my home office on evenings and weekends. During the weekday, I can't see any windows whatsoever from my cubicle desk, and it upsets me to be so cut off from nature. However, when I'm writing at home (I was traveling from my downtown office tomyhome while you were writing your response), I have a wall of windows to my left that I love to look out. Perhaps this is what you were picking up on?
Hi Sue, and welcome to the workshop! Thanks for your participation here!
Like most folks, peace and love are right up there on my "things I enjoy" list. Animals, not so much. People? Well, it depends... Some days more than others, for sure. :-D
Well, I'm a nutcase too, then. I have had similar experiences, but the beings that you're referring to aren't our guardian angels. They're beings that reside on a lower astral plane than guides and angels. And I agree with you that it's strangely non-fear-provoking - I had "dreams" around the time of my miscarriage that "aliens" had taken my child, and for whatever reason, I felt perfectly fine about it. Since then, I've explored many of the astral planes, and have come to understand a few things about how the planes interact. I wouldn't necessarily call our relationship to them as one of "livestock", though, because they do respect us asequally-sentient beings.
Thanks, Roxanne! It was a lot of fun to put this thing together, and I'm glad for folks that find something in it that speaks to them. Let us all know how it goes for you?
Absolutely! I've been thinking about all of those quite a lot today. Nice work!
Yay! Congratulations! Great work! It sounds like you've got the hang of it now. After you do a few more, you might give a try to working on someone else's. It's a similar process, but feelsdifferent because it's someone else's "memories" that you're dealing with.I saw your comment on my profile, too. Buffalo Bill? Ha ha! Your guides are hilarious.
Actually, it's not a given. In fact, it's something of a recent development. I do like water a lot, but I guess I have to, living in this water-logged city. I found out a few years ago that I can't eat gluten, and I haven't had a cinnamon bun since. My daughter really craves them (she can't eat gluten either), but she can eat the gluten-free kind sometimes (I can't). The latest culinary creation that I'm enjoying is gluten-, dairy-, sugar-free homemade energy bars, which is about as close to a cinnamon bun as I can get (and still eat).
Thanks so much for this comment, SnakeMedicine! This is actually one of the main reasons that I started the workshop in the first place, because I wanted toteachpeople howto have precisely this kind of impact for themselves and for others. Past life retrievals - both ones that have been done for me by others, as well as ones I've done for myself - have madea similardifference for me too, and when you pile up lots of little differences (like, say, more than5 retrievals), it adds up to make a big change!
Showing, telling, meh - it's all the same thing to me. You understood what she was getting at, and that's enough. If you have time for a rather long-windedbasic overview about the topic ofpast lives, you could try reading this blog entry.
I have a long waiting list going for past life readings, but I can add you to the list, if you're willing to have your reading be public (for educational purposes). I probably won't have time to get to it this year, so hopefully someone else will volunteer? Retro Girl does past life readings; I'm not sure who else does at the moment.
Ha ha ha! Well... (blushing) Thanks!
Thanks for sharing your experience!
I'd like to agree with this, and add that perhaps there were multiple things going on in your experience. I'd guess that Imperia is your "higher self" (or your level 2 self, as SnakeMedicine describes), and that she was also showing you a past life level 1 self that needs your attention, if that makes sense.
I am indeed joyful in general, so that might be what you're picking up on!
Hi Annmarie, That's great! But yes, you read the question wrong. We're talking about me here. I should hope that psychic ability wouldn't be necessary to answer this question for yourself! Try again?
Ha! Yep! I was happily thinking of the new bike that I'd like to buy for my brother the next time he comes to visit. Nice job!
I hear you! Unfortunately, many times when someone goes to a psychic for assistance, there's a lot of negativity there. Many of the exercises later in this workshop deal with effectively managing that negativity in various ways, so I encourage you to press on! I'd be interested to hear ifcoming back to this exercise after you've had a chance to work on the meditation sections of the course would change your experience at all.
Ah... Forgiveness. Recognizing that who a person IS and what a person DOES isn't necessarily the same thing, and that it's not our job to assign punishments when peoplehave treated us badly is such a relief, isn't it? It does take constant practice, though! Thanks for doing this exercise and letting us know how it went!
That's great to hear! Thanks for sharing your experience with the exercise!
Your middle name is Caroline? Okay, that makes sense. I couldn't figure out how the name Carolyn (they don't spell stuff out for me)could be your name, yet not your name. That's awesome! Yes, the spirit helpers in your group were freakin' laugh riots. You must be much the same.
As you already figured out,a lot of times when people have compulsions that are seemingly irrational, the culprit is something that happened in a past life. I got the impression that this particular lifetime was really having a noticeable impact on your lifetime now, so it will be interesting tosee if yourworry aboutnot having enough food begins to diminish over the next 6 months or so. (It usually takes some time for this type of change to become obvious, although sometimes it is apparent right away.) You might also have an easier time doing retrievals on your own now too, now that the "biggie" is out of the way. Keep us posted on your progress!
Ta dum! It's your turn! I'm getting the feeling that this reading is going to be a difficult one, so I apologize in advance for any upset it may cause, although I'm not quite sure what I'm apologizing for just yet... Here's your reading:
For this particular reading, I found that I needed to do the whole thing before writing about it, which isn't what I usually do. First, I believe that your spirit name might be Carolyn? The guide that came to me for you, who was female, called you Carolyn, but I got the impression that Carolyn isn't necessarily your name in this life or in the one I saw.
The lifetime I saw took place in the area now known as Afghanistan, but it was over 3,000 years ago. In the area, there had been a famine, which caused the tribes to war against each other more than usual. Your home town was destroyed by fighting, and you were forced to flee. I found you ina cave in the hills. You'd become a little feral as a result of a combination of post-partum depression (yourbaby had died soon after birth due to your malnutrition during the pregnancy and afterward), grief for your late husband who had died as a result of the fighting, fatigue from being on the run, hunger, and cold weather. Your husband's son from his first wife was with you, and died of hypothermia in the cave that night. He must have been about 10 years old or so. Being close to starvation yourself, you cooked and ate him the next day.
I can't precisely describe the complete misery of the experience, but it was overwhelming. I first checked to see if the son had been able to cross over, and he hadn't yet. I picked him up and sent him across. For you, it was more difficult. I thought that maybe I should fix you up before trying to convince you to cross over, so I set a spiritual space heater in the cave and a low table with a spread of delicious food in front of you. You were too cold too move, and too overwhelmed from the horror that you had experienced.
Ithought of bringing you to my place, and instantly you were in a hot bath in my own personal spiritual sanctuary. I waited while you bathed - being clean and warm improved your outlook a lot. We sat for a while; I wanted to let you eat, if you wanted, and just absorb what had happened. I decided to tell you/her why I was there - that your now self had asked me to go get your then self. I made a giant TV plasma screen appear and showed your then self pictures of what the world is like today. We talked about what the area that she was from is like today (i.e. much the same). I got the strong feeling that I should show her you now, so I opened a portal so that she could look at you. She was happy when she saw you, happy that you are safe. As soon as she saw you, she started to fade out, to become transparent like she was being "beamed up", and although she's crossed over now,I can still hear her voice. She wants me to let you know that she is sooo grateful to you that you thought to check on her.
I do get two guides/spirit helpersfor you here right now - a female and a male. The female I also get a wolf aspect for, if that makes sense - like I see her also as a wolf. The male I see also as a stag. In their totem animal aspects, I also get an owl and a mouse as additional spirit helpers for you. It seems like it'seasier for me to see them in their animal aspects. Okay, now it makes sense what happened at the beginning of the reading - at the beginning of the reading, before I was able to see the cave, my spirit self collapsed and fell onto the ground of my imaginary reading space. I think that I must have turned into a snake! Fun!
It's also easier I think for me to hear their names when they're in their animal aspects. I'm getting a Belal for your wolf, and something I have no idea how to pronounce for your stag. Did he just give me his name in deer language? Ah, geez... Now he's making some wisecrack about calling him something do to with his "horns". Ha ha! Lovely. Your owl is called La-terr-AN (or something like that), and I'm not getting a clear gender. The mouse is the smarty pants of the group, kind of an old wise man in his human aspect, and likes the name Bill. Or Bob. But not Billy Bob. Just Bill is good. Sweet lord almightly, you've got a hilarious group here!
Billy Bob wants to say something. He says that you shouldn't feel bad about not making time to get to know them. You already know them. Your focus is rightly in your day-to-day life, and you will know them regardless of what efforts you make. You have no choice! Ha ha. You're stuck with them. You see us often, he says, in little signs and ways like that. Bill is fading out. It seems like it took him a lot of effort to appear to me and give me such a clear message for you. Bilal has been with you for a long time, and although Bill is kind of the ring leader of your personal circus, I'm getting that Bilal works more closely with you on a day-to-day basis. You don't often notice her presence, though. She's so subtle, like a soft breeze that comes through. I could talka lot moreabout your horny stag,too, but I'll just leave that topic alone for now - we want to keep the threads PG-rated, I think.
Anyhow, that's about it, I think! Let me know if you have any questions about this.