By Emmy Long, 2015-03-10
We could all use some reminders of love and personal power:"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent." -Eleanor Roosevelt"The mind is everything, what you think you become." -Buddah"All great changes are preceded by chaos." -deepok chopraAlways remember, you are perfectly imperfect, as we all are. Conflict is beautiful and uncertainty is exciting. Change makes us grow, and solidarity gives us our roots. Love yourself where ever you are in life. You'll end end up where you are meant to be. <3
By Emmy Long, 2015-03-08
Well I feel like I have a lot of friends on here now since joining, and I consider that such a blessing. Especially right now in this moment, when I need to pour my soul out to somebody but don't think I can do it face to face. I have been posting a lot of negative posts lately. And that's just not me, but my life hasn't been normal lately.Where to even start. I guess with the big issue. My boyfriend/fianc (we're in a weird place right now as you'll soon read) relapsed. He is a heroin addict, and got into some legal trouble about a year ago and as a result got put into a program where is required to complete certain classes and also gets drug tested a couple of times a week. He was doing so well, and then all of a sudden he wasn't. And because of a failed drug test, he got set to jail about two weeks ago and has to stay there until he can get into a rehab facility. He will most likely wait around a month in jail and then complete a 28 day program at the rehab. I'm just hoping that's long enough, but I'm fearful it won't be. I went through the whole addiction thing with him once and I swore I would NEVER do it again. Unless you've been through it, you have no idea the implications you go through as a result of dating an addict. It wasn't fair to me. So I'm really struggling on what to do now. I have decided to support him through this one relapse because I love him so much and I'm just not ready to give up. But I'm terrified.Then, this really great guy who is basically perfect starts talking to me again and made it perfectly clear that he wants to be with me. Now, I will never cheat, but this totally through me for a loop. I'm staying with my boyfriend, whom I love, but it's a huge risk. And here's this perfect guy waiting for me right there in front of my face. I'm not saying I would get into a serious relationship with this other guy if I were single, but I do want that fun relationship back where I don't have to worry about drugs and lies and prison. Doesn't help that we as empaths take on the emotions of the people crushing on us. Luckily I am able to separate them from my own. And so now here I am. Risking a lot for the person I love. And I realize I've been feeling a lot better since he's been in jail these last two weeks. And that makes me feel so guilty. I'm not happy that HE is gone. I'm just happy that the drugs and everything they bring with them are out of my life again.I'm just torn. And feeling guilty even though I've done nothing wrong. And I'm terrified. And as mush as I hate to admit it, I'm relieved.
By Emmy Long, 2015-01-18
I'm not sure where to start or where this will end or even if it will end up being about empathy. I feel pressure from everybody in my life right now. I have always been about living life my way and by my own standards, but to have relationships with others you have to conform to an extent and I understand that. But lately it seems like the things I have to do to maintain these relationships are putting a lot of pressure and stress on me. These are things I should be doing to better myself, but at the moment, I don't have the inner strength to make myself do them. I'm just not ready. I know I need to wait and do things at a pace I can handle, but the repercussions it's going to have on some of my relationships when it's all out in the open are going to cause me even more stress. Ive been hiding my lack of progress from some people and I know I need to be honest and get it out in the open. But I know the stress that's going to come of it when I do. I'm lost at the moment.
By Emmy Long, 2015-01-03
"With great power comes great responsibility." They said that on Spider-man but it applies to my life right now. There is somebody in my life currently (not exactly by my own choice) who has been driving me absolutely crazy with their blatant lack of respect for me. With the exception of a few rude remarks under my breath, I had been letting it slide because they are a friend of my boyfriend. Well, last night I finally let loose on this person. Let me preface this by saying I have a ROTTEN temper but I can control it well, but once I lose it I can be a little a-hole. Last night this person needed my boyfriend to give them a ride using my car. I said ok but that I had to be to work in an hour and not to make me late. They show up about 3 min before I'm supposed to be to work (its a ten min drive). And I absolutely lost it, this person has a bad habit of saying something is going to take 5 min and then it takes like 20. Apparently my boyfriend thought it would be fine to take me to work then go drop his friend off. I told them to both get out of my car and then I made his friend WALK home. It's like a 30 min walk. And it's cold here. I could feel how angry I made his friend.Now I'm not saying he maybe didn't deserve it, but here's why I feel so guilty. I actually liked that I made him so mad. It was like finally after treating me like crap, causing problems in my relationship, using my boyfriend, I had finally gotten him back. I never want to use empathy as a way to get revenge because revenge is ugly and this gift is beautiful. So for that reason, I feel a little guilty. Am I crazy?
By Emmy Long, 2014-12-15
I'm changing. It's definitely for the better but it all seems so surreal to me at the moment. This past summer I learned I was an empath, and I think I lucked out because I've been one my whole life and have never had to struggle much with it. I some how natuarally learned to adapt and it's always been a blessing and a gift to me. I found this community and learned and grew even more in my gift. A few months after joining I learned I am also a lightworker (at least I'm fairly sure of it). Once I learned this I began researching and learning about that aspect of myself and I really enjoy and embrace it.But now I feel there is more in me that is coming to the surface and changing me yet again, but this time I have no idea what it is. Most recently I have been receiving the messages in my dreams that I am changing yet again. I am excited to learn what is coming, but I don't know just yet how I am supposed to be figuring out what this new thing is. I had a dream in which I pulled a large cloth out of my forehead and I woke up feeling the cloth was a block or a negative thing within myself that I had removed. A few nights later I had a dream and in the dream i woke up and there was bright white/rainbow light pouring out of my mouth. I woke up from this dream feeling like I now am able to let out this light that was blocked by whatever I removed when I removed the cloth in the previous dream.A few weeks ago I saw a memory of my dad's as he was talking about it. I've always had the ability to just know and understand things, but up to that point I had never SEEN them. It was like a movie in my head.During meditations I feel myself connecting to the source more easily and a lot stronger. I feel like I'm neing prepared for what's coming soon during these meditations.I have more internal strength and courage than I've ever had in my life before. I think this is being brought on because I'm questioning things a lot less. Somehow I just KNOW more. I'm sure of things now that I could only speculate on before.I'd like to start doing research to try to figure out what this next change is that is coming but for the first time I don't even know where to start looking. I have absolutely no clue what all of this is or where I'm headed with it. I feel good about it and I'm actually excited.
By Emmy Long, 2014-09-02
For the past couple of weeks I had been feeling very unsettled and didn't know why. Today after a chakra clearing meditation I found myself again. After some reflection I was finally able to gather y normal thoughts and perspective again. I guess I may be writing this for myself to go back and read next time I find myself in a similar "funk", but I'll share it for others to read too.This is what I know:Love and happiness are always there even when I can't feel them. And if we need a little help seeing them, the best way to focus them is by being them for others.It's much easier to feel good than it is bad. Next time I'm feeling so negative, all I need to do is focus on the positives. Our world is what we perceive it to be.Patience is a virtue. If something doesn't work out right away, it doesn't mean it never will. And if I waiting for something to happen, obsessing about it won't make it happen any sooner.Sometimes, people are mean. Not everyone is as sensitive as myself, and I shouldn't expect them to be. In fact if everyone were as concerned about others as I am, things might not get done. So next time somebody aggravates me with their insensitivities, I will remember it takes all kinda for the world to go round.The world isn't always fair right away, but things even themselves out over time. You'll get yours and they'll get theirs. Eventually.Dogs are better than people sometimes. If I'm feeling like there's no hope left in humanity, I can always turn to my Lola Baby for love and endless kisses.Cruelty stems from lack of understanding. I like to believe that if people actually FELT the hurt they caused, they would stop. I'll try to think of that next time somebody is mean. Because remember, people are mean.Lastly, I'm not perfect and never can be. To expect that of myself is unreasonable and will always lead to disappointment. But I AM good enough.Love you all of you empath community. <3