I'm so confused.

Camq
Camq
@camq
2 months ago
6 posts
Since I've gotten older and I've been forced to interact with persons within my age group (19-27), I've been asking myself more often...what is wrong with me?

If I'm not having confrontations with people for hurting or disrespecting my friends, I'm having confrontations with people about not wanting to be mistreated anymore only to be told I love playing the victim because I'm always crying from the anxiety and fear and stress these people inflict upon me.

What's wrong with me? Why can't I stay at work on bad days?

Why do I feel the urge to hurt myself because I feel I've been burdening my good friend with all my problems and he hadn't replied in almost 3 days.

I hate myself. I want to disappear. Why do I feel so much?

Why does the thought of writing stories bring me comfort but I can't push myself to get up and do it?

I'm just so tired. My managers told lies on me and made me get demoted and I can't breathe because I tried so hard and everyone told me I did a good job.

Why do I try for everyone but myself?

Am I an empath? Am I truly? Or am I just a self-absorbed person. Am I just broken?

I don't want to talk to my friends about this. That I've started hurting myself again...but it's the only thing that eases the frustration.


Am I really an empath?
updated by @camq: 12/10/17 12:20:23PM
Warden
Warden
@warden
2 months ago
15 posts
I don't know a lot about you so I can't say if you're an empath or not. But you are obviously sensitive to others energy and need to learn to control what energy you allow yourself to pick up. I suggest getting some protection stones as well. Like obsidian or another black stone. Your bosses sound horrible I would find a new place of employment, it sounds like a toxic environment not good to be in at all. Please no matter how hard it is to write if that's an outlet that makes you happy do it! Where I know how self harm can temporarily make you feel better there are better ways to do that. As cliche as it sounds try meditation and maybe some oils. Exercise can be helpful too. It sounds like you're attraction toxic ppl you may need to smudge yourself daily to cleanse off all that negative energy. I know I babbled and may not sound the clearest but these were my thoughts.
Camq
Camq
@camq
2 months ago
6 posts
Warden:
I don't know a lot about you so I can't say if you're an empath or not. But you are obviously sensitive to others energy and need to learn to control what energy you allow yourself to pick up. I suggest getting some protection stones as well. Like obsidian or another black stone. Your bosses sound horrible I would find a new place of employment, it sounds like a toxic environment not good to be in at all. Please no matter how hard it is to write if that's an outlet that makes you happy do it! Where I know how self harm can temporarily make you feel better there are better ways to do that. As cliche as it sounds try meditation and maybe some oils. Exercise can be helpful too. It sounds like you're attraction toxic ppl you may need to smudge yourself daily to cleanse off all that negative energy. I know I babbled and may not sound the clearest but these were my thoughts.

Thank you so much for replying dear. I'm gonna see what I can do.

I have been in a room with my previous bosses before and the energy they were giving off has sent me to the doctor before.

I felt insane not knowing what was wrong.
Camq
Camq
@camq
2 months ago
6 posts
angeldelight:
The way I discovered I was an empath, was mainly due to 'feeling' emotions that didn't feel like mine or didn't fit right within my life at the times I felt them, same with my thoughts, at times it didn't make sense why I would think certain things or have certain thoughts that didn't feel like mine. One has to be very aware and alert of the self internally as externally to be able to recognise if they are empathic or not, might be different for others but that's my story.

Don't feel tge need to inflict pain upon yourself, it's understandable how tempting it can be in frustrating situations, but try and face what triggers you to feel this way rather than running or using a temporary fix.
I'm trying my best to be aware. I've realized I tend to mirror others moods around me. But it seems it's only if those people have some sort of importance to me.

I don't know. Maybe I'm HSP? I know that for sure. I'm writer, nature puts me at ease, I have different feelings for different locations that I've been in my life that I can't explain. Each location just has a unique feeling that if I were to describe it to someone it would have to be in the form of music or colors.

For so long I've thought I'm just messed in the head.

And I'm always trying to read people?Their face, their mannerisms and I don't know why... It's not as if I'm doing it consciously....I just do it.

I keep finding myself giving relationship advice and life advice and my life and relationships are far from decent. Yet people still come to me to talk about it.


Idk maybe I'm not an empath. Persons keep aligning them to Psychics and I know I definitely cannot read minds.
Warden
Warden
@warden
2 months ago
15 posts
I understand that that I went to a psychic reading before him it was a group session and almost everybody in the room was an empath and energy worker or some sort of a psychic and all that energy in one room my whole body was vibrating and I felt extremely nauseous. I have worked for toxic people and was always unhappy and would gain a lot of weight. When I quit one of those places I dropped 40 lb in like 3 months without doing anything to try to lose that weight. I hope you can figure out what to do to help bring you some piece. It does sound like the first thing you need to do is find a new place to work good luck and much light and love
Camq
Camq
@camq
2 months ago
6 posts
Warden:
I understand that that I went to a psychic reading before him it was a group session and almost everybody in the room was an empath and energy worker or some sort of a psychic and all that energy in one room my whole body was vibrating and I felt extremely nauseous. I have worked for toxic people and was always unhappy and would gain a lot of weight. When I quit one of those places I dropped 40 lb in like 3 months without doing anything to try to lose that weight. I hope you can figure out what to do to help bring you some piece. It does sound like the first thing you need to do is find a new place to work good luck and much light and love

Wow, that's insane. 40lbs?! I'm glad you're out of that environment. I'm trying to do the same. At my work place it's very dog eat dog and it doesn't sit well with my spirit. It makes me nauseous.

I'm actually leaving sometime next week to another department. Ty much light and love to you as well 😄😄😄
Shevone
Shevone
@shevone
2 months ago
7 posts

random experiences....

Some times my thoughts and emotions are so amplified sometimes negative words hurt when said by people and after while im sitting trying to dismiss the hurt, i blurt out, negative comments about myself as if im talking to myself as another person, im my head and sometimes out loud, that hurts even more ... i have no idea why that happens...

i had an argument with my friend in her car while she was driving(we were both so filled with angry)and she told me to get out of her car and while it was moving i opened the door and jumped out , with out thinking nor rationalizing, it was as if i was on auto pilot, i got hurt pretty bad and up to this day i dont know why that happened...

i remember trying to help a friend through a depressive day that she was having and ended up feeling depressed to point where i physically started walking as if i wanted to get away from the emotions and feelings and ended up by the sea side trying to get over what i was feeling. After going home and calling my friend i realized that she was no long depressed, my friend was happy and i was sad and depressed... what sort of transfer was that?

i AM so obsessed with finding out what life really is and at times regret that im human...  i think i go crazy sometimes trying to fiind out what this is all about 

Am i emphatic or going crazy?

Hop Daddy
Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
2 months ago
578 posts

@camq@warden:

It's actually pretty widely known that empaths carry a little extra weight. Some have said that it help protects us from all the energy we deal with each day. I have to admit that I don't really understand how that works. But we have on this site taken a few surveys that gave us the conclusion that most empaths can be a little over weight. And during real tough times can gain a lot of weight. And I guess you can probably see that in about anyone who is going through a tough time. Except that we empaths are so emotionally wired that we go through a lot most days. As an example, I had a neighbor a year ago who was dying of stage 4 cancer. I was completely unaware of this except that I went through a couple weeks of immense sadness when I was at the front of my house. I was later able to connect that to his finals days. And I found both food and drink to be comforting during that time and put on some weight.

@warden, I think that is awesome that you got yourself out of a toxic environment and immediately saw an improvement in your health and weight. That's a great example of how much a bad environment can impact us empaths.

@camq, I did want to say that you are a millennial. And from my observation, your generation is going through a cranky, frustrated "us against the world" type of existence these days. And then you add in all the social media use, and you are caught in a web of strong and dark emotions that you get from others all of the time. You are going to want to try to limit your exposure to people and things that bring you down until you have a better handle on your empathy.

I just finished responding to a few posts on this site and they all have the same needs. I recommend looking through the past postings so you can better understand how empathy works. And you really need to learn about meditating and grounding your absorbed energy so that you can cleanse yourself and feel better each day. When I have a little more time later this week I'll try to start a thread that better explains grounding and various ways to achieve that. And if anyone else wants to get a head start on that, I welcome the assistance.

Hop Daddy
Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
2 months ago
578 posts

For all of you new empaths trying to make sense of it all, a good place to start is an empath quiz. If you score high on the quiz, then you should have validation that you are indeed an empath and that you are not losing your mind. There are quizzes all over the internet. The one below is a good place to start.

http://www.empathtest.com/

Camq
Camq
@camq
2 months ago
6 posts
@hop-daddy

Tysm for replying and sharing your thoughts. I've actually done that test twice, plus some others and for all of them I scored very highly.

I guess I was skeptical because it's scary to think that for so long I've thought there was something strange about me...and now there's a word for it. It's scary and exciting at the same time.

Many times I cried myself to sleep because I felt I always created problems. I would tell people that what they're doing hurts only to be told

I'm too sensitive.
I'm like wet bread.
Don't take things so personal.

But then I think, why do I feel fine when one person pokes fun at me and not fine when another person does the same thing?

Why do I hide from things that I fantasize about showering with my love and care? Because I know how passionate I am and how hard I feel. Seeing them hurt would kill me. I fear for my life if I lose my mother or my father. I'd be admitted. My mind would split.

When I was young I cried because I didn't know how I would survive the world.

It's crazy.
Hop Daddy
Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
2 months ago
578 posts

@camq:

Do you know what we hear most often from every new person that posts to this site? "My friends and family tell me I'm too sensitive". And do you know what? You are overly sensitive. And that's your gift. You don't just hear words when you speak to someone, you feel the emotional energy coming off of each word. Quite often you can feel energy with no words spoken. You walk into a room and already know the vibe, right?

Have you ever had a friend who was going through a tough time but put on a brave face and tried to hide their problems from everyone? But as soon as they spoke you knew something was wrong when others did not? Or have you had a friend or acquaintance who always acts and says that their life is so perfect and wants everyone to know how great they are. And everyone is jealous and wants to be like them. But as soon as they speak, you sense their hidden insecurities and see through their mask that they are not who they project that they are?

A nice part of our gift as empaths is that we have a built in B.S. meter. Words carry emotional meaning to us. And people can say a lot of things, and act like they are all that. But they can't hide their real self from an empath. That's one of my favorite parts of this. People come to me for help and before they even really explain their problem to me, their emotional energy is already clueing me in to what's troubling them.

I think you will eventually embrace your empathy gift. Sure, some people will tell you that you're too sensitive. And do you know who points that out the most? The people in our lives who are most threatened by us. They sense at a spiritual level who you are. And sensing that you are knowing and can see through their BS makes them very uncomfortable. It's very subconscious and spiritual. These people don't know what's going on yet they are threatened/irritated by you. And their response is to try to intimidate you or ridicule you so that you keep quiet and are looked at as insignificant to the rest of the group. Hold your ground with those people. You have power over them. They are the ones that are threatened. 

When you have a person hurting you with their words there is an energy exchange going on there. Obviously, no one likes to be made fun of. So there is some regular human hurt from being picked on. But as an empath there is more to it. You attract low emotional energy because you are wired to transform low energy into high energy. Bullies are usually some of the most insecure people in the room. You as an empath have a high vibration (very good high energy). Someone that is really depressed or sad is going to have very low vibrational energy. And someone who is a bully is going to be pretty low on the vibrational scale as well since deep down inside they have issues. They are attracted to you for this reason (again on a spiritual level that they don't understand). And they want to hurt you or knock you down a few notches through humiliation so that they can continue being the alpha male or alpha female. I bet you are surprised to hear that you are such a threat to them?

I have three quick things that you can do to help yourself feel better around others. First off, be choosy where you go. If you have to be with people that stress you out or a place that stresses you out then limit your time there or skip it altogether. If it feels bad in any environment know that your high vibrational energy is being drained and that you need a break. And secondly, if you are feeling too much you can get overwhelmed and feel very weak and helpless out and about. You need to meditate and ground daily to clear your mind. Start getting good at that and you will literally feel the negative of the day coming off of your body. And my last suggestion is to look into protection stones. This is a topic that we discuss often here. For an empath there are stones and crystals that can actually mute or level off the low energy that seeks you every day. It’s like a forcefield that limits what hits you. I have had good luck with black tourmaline, black onyx, and shungite. If you are new to protection stones it is going to sound absolutely crazy. I laughed like I was a nutcase when I first tried it. But it really works. You will find with some protection stones in your pocket or purse (or even better if touching skin as a bracelet), that you will be more stable out in public. And you'll feel more balanced and less weak when facing difficult people.

At this point just take baby steps. Read through this website and others to better understand who you are and your special skills as an empath. Feel free to continue posting questions here. And we're all here to try to help you get more balanced/grounded so that you can see your empathy as a gift rather than a curse.

hana
@hana
2 months ago
71 posts

Hi friend. I would start by genuinely believing in yourself, reading motivational content, and following inspirational leaders.

If anyone or anything is causing you harm or negativity in your life, get rid of it.

If not. it'll just add to anything negative that is already present in your life.

Good luck on your journey, and be patient and compassionate with yourself. It starts from within. <3 

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