Please help - How to get rid of narcissist roommate

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hana
@hana
one month ago
45 posts

I will spare the extra details unless asked because this situation is really terrible... I have been physically and emotionally sick for days in the beginning of this.

I'm basically couch surfing until I get another place. If you thought of every negative quality you can think of in a person and put it in her [minus being a murderer, psychopath, or child molester], and that is the kind of person I am currently sharing a living space with. I don't know what to do to because when i'm not around, all I can think of is how negative she is. I can feel evil seething from her, and it's like a dark cloud or black ink that travels wherever she goes.. [even if i'm in my own room and she's in another part of the house] and she puts on such a grand front in front of other people, it makes me sick!

Anyway, how can I remedy this situation so I can have a peace of mind and concentrate on school? Any advice will be helped. Non-sensitive people unfortunately aren't tuned to certain things so they have been as much help as they could have (which was not a lot). I know they were trying to help, but i'm hoping everyone here has the perspective I need.

I think it is worse because she seemed like a very nice person at first and did a very good job of hiding stuff from me [which makes me think she has done this before]. 

~~~


updated by @hana: 11/12/17 12:27:58AM
Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
one month ago
502 posts

@hana 

Sorry to hear about your recent life challenge. If you are an empath, then it is no surprise that a narc found you and lured you in. Keeping narcs at a distance is one of the keys for any empath. They are attracted to us like moths to a flame. And they are very harmful once we let them in our lives.

My obvious answer is for you to get out immediately. But I am guessing that finances may restrict how quickly you can move away. Definitely keep your distance as much as you can. You can also neutralize her negative energy with protection stones. I personally love black onyx and black tourmaline for that.

The protection stones help but won't block all of her energy. A narc will drive you crazy and make you really stressed out. You're going to want to work on getting that negative energy out of you as a way to cope. Working out and being outside for breaks helps. Quiet meditation with breathing exercises is another great way to expel negative energy. And I personally really like taking a bath with Himalayan or rock salts. Salt neutralizes negative energy and will draw that out of you. A bath is the best way for your entire body to get exposed to the salt.

Hopefully the above helps you cope while you are planning for a new place to live. Best of luck. I hope you can move on quickly from her.

hana
@hana
one month ago
45 posts

Yup! At the moment, since I have limited finances, and i'm in the middle of midterms and working, i've been looking for places nonstop. Luckily I have family I can stay with as of now, but I hate having my items staying in that house at the moment and absorbing all of her junk from the house into my next one. 

Whenever I go to the house to feed my cat or get clothes, I try to put an orb around everything in my room, but I have a very limited supply of energy right now so that hasn't been able to happen lately.. :( 

And for some reason I can't seem to find my stones!! It's so odd because they are usually in the same exact place place. I have two black onyx stones that were in my drawer, but I guess i'll have to get more 

Do you know if carrying around a mini pouch with Himalayan salt will help in the meantime? I just don't have the energy to do the things that would usually help me. 

And thank you for your advice. I really appreciate your insight and feedback. This is definitely a hard time as of now. 

Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
one month ago
502 posts

The thing to remember about protection stones is that they have their limits and need to be cleaned/recharged. Some block negative energy while others absorb negative energy. To keep your stones working in top condition you will need to set them in the sun for most of the day (some people run water over them or set them in moonlight, but I find  sunlight does the trick). What I do is have enough stones to alternate with one set cleansing in the sun while I wear the other set. I like black onyx in combo with black tourmaline. But tourmaline is the better stone of the two so you may want to pick one up. I keep them in a pouch in my pocket. But some people find better luck when they touch your skin (like a bracelet).

You can try the salt pouch idea. That could work although I think the protection stones are a better option. And like I said, most importantly, you need to find a way to draw negative out of you each day through meditation, salt baths or whatever fits you. In doing so you will be much calmer and find your roommate more tolerable. Good luck and let us know how you are doing.

hana
@hana
one month ago
45 posts

Thank you so much!

It's such a relief to come here and know you guys exist.

I will keep updates as I can :}

hana
@hana
one month ago
45 posts

Hello hop daddy,

I was able to find a better place!  I'm moving Friday!  ^3^

I found my rocks and started packing everything up. I'm not out of the hole yet because I still have to make trips back and forth from there, but i'm going to do my best not to let her affect me while I do, as she has resorted to slamming doors and knocking things down. 

Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
one month ago
502 posts

@hana:

Congrats on the move! You will feel like your life renewed when you get out of there. And her reaction is classic. Narcs are like children throwing tantrums when they lose control over their target. Enjoy your new place and new found peace.

hana
@hana
one month ago
45 posts

Thank you! ^3^

Bing
@bing
one week ago
547 posts

Hi Hana 

I am including a couple of links on narcissists on how they manipulate people and what to do if you are in your life. I hope that they prove helpful to you.

Signs You are Living with a Narcissist

Narcissist / Empath Relationship

Throw some love into the wind.

Bing

Cheshire Cat
@cheshire-cat
one week ago
1,185 posts

Dear Hana,

I do not want to alarm you, but please get your sweet cat out of there ASAP! I have seen narcs harm animals in retaliation. I have a friend who left her two cats alone in the same house as her Narc DIL, despite my warning, and they ended up "accidentally" poisoned by something that "got into" their food. There was no way to prove she did it, but we all knew it. I would never wish such a tragedy on you. 

I married into a nest of Narcs, so I have lots of experience with them. Recently, the APA finally acknowledged what I've thought all along, ie. that Narcs are on a continuum with psychopaths.

I know today is your move and am praying you and your kitty are out of there by now and safe.

Blessings be yours,

C. Cat

hana
@hana
one week ago
45 posts

Thank you all again for your wonderful information and insight. <3

My cat seems a lot more happier and calm now! He may have been picking up on the negativity

Thankfully I am out of the house, and she seems to have found a way to leave from the house every time I come back to get more things so it seems as if I have won this battle. hahaha 

Light always wins guys!!! 

I will remember all of this in the future if I ever have to deal with this kind of thing again! 

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