Strange Encounter - Hurt for days (I am new to this)

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GardenTiger
@gardentiger
5 months ago
4 posts

Hi all,

I am very new to this whole topic of being an Empath but I have to say after reading about it, it felt like a real eye-opener, and I believe I might be an Empath.

One question that was not answered anywhere online for me (or in Elise's book which I read in one sitting on Sunday :) ) is, can it be that some negative feelings I get from a person last within me for multiple days or even a week etc.? I had an encounter with an old friend of mine on Friday, which I haven't seen in years, we talked we touched and eventually we briefly kissed. I left rather abruptly because I did not feel comfortable with the situation for some reason, I think he was angry then which may play into the problem I have now. 

I know that he has serious issues at the moment, he was just dumped by his girlfriend of many years for another man and was obviously in pain. The strange thing is, that I felt really really bad the next day (when the Alcohol was out of my system I guess!) I felt real heartache and it felt like I was going through a break up myself (which I'm not!) I felt such heartache and pain and did not know why, until it dawned on me that those might be HIS feelings and not mine at all! I found this website and tried the technique of turning down his and other peoples volume - instant relief! But I feel that it's coming back in waves here and there so now I'm struggling with this since almost a week. Is this 'normal' that these aches can last for such a long time? Also, does it mean he is feeling that at this moment in time, or does he think about me and hence extending his pain to me at that moment, or did he more like 'dump' these feelings on me at that point when we met and merrily went his way leaving me to deal with what he left me? I'm trying to understand how this works exactly, also to prepare myself for future encounters like this.

Also I must say that the past week/s I went through kind of a transformation, I feel like the 'real me' is emerging again after being dormant for many years, I cannot really pinpoint why but it feels good, even though many things happen at the same time now, like the above issue I had.

Thank you already for reading this and I'm hoping someone has some info for me regarding this :) 


updated by @gardentiger: 11/03/17 08:21:58AM
Trevor Lewis
@trevor-lewis
5 months ago
273 posts

Welcome @gardentiger

"I believe I might be an Empath" - I dont believe you are an empath - I KNOW you are. Everything you are saying is classic!

"can it be that some negative feelings I get from a person last within me for multiple days or even a week etc.?" - Certainly, he has got his attention on you and you are picking up everything he is "dumping" on you.

"Is this 'normal' that these aches can last for such a long time?" yes, if there is a strong connection between the two of you. There are a number of factors affecting how we pick up energy from other people:

  • Receiving
    Our sensitivity as receivers will factor into how much energy we pick up.
  • Sending 
    Some people transmit their energy more strongly than others, and the depth of the emotions that they are experiencing will also turn up the volume that they are sending out.
  • Awareness
    The unaware person may be just as sensitive as the aware person. The latter will understand why they have mood swings; the former will not.
  • Bloodline
    Blood relatives will affect us regardless of where in the world we are and whether we are thinking about them or not. The link between sender and receiver is often stronger where there is a blood connection. Often, empath children may process the emotions of their parents or siblings long into adulthood.
  • Emotional Connection
    Friends and acquaintances will impact us primarily based on the strength of the emotional connection we have to them, largely without regard to physical proximity. The stronger the emotional connection is, the less important the physical proximity is. Having worked from home for many years with teams spread all over the country, I have picked up energy from managers and teammates regardless of location.
  • Physical Proximity
    Neighbors and strangers will influence us based on physical proximity. This is true for the people living in our neighborhood and the strangers we brush up against in the shopping mall.

"does it mean he is feeling that at this moment in time, or does he think about me and hence extending his pain to me at that moment, or did he more like 'dump' these feelings on me at that point when we met and merrily went his way leaving me to deal with what he left me?". I suspect that it is a combination of "he is feeling that at this moment in time, or does he think about me and hence extending his pain to me at that moment" but I would be interested in other people here weighing in on this topic.

"I feel like the 'real me' is emerging again after being dormant for many years," There is a lot of "waking up" going on - a tidal wave of new consciousness. You are right on target with this new energy. Enjoy it ... as best you can ... its a wild ride!

Blessings, Trevor

Cat Whisperer
@cat-whisperer
5 months ago
727 posts
Welcome to the EC @gardentiger
I can relate to everything that you have posted. Also, the advice/knowledge that @trevor-lewis shared is on point. I have noticed that some of the stronger feelings will last for weeks even, and I do believe that if someone has you on their mind or should I say in their sights the emotions will be harder to shake. However, just being able to acknowledge that the emotions aren't yours is the first step in ridding yourself of them. You might also try soaking in sea salt with the intent of washing away the negative feelings. Spending time in nature also helps with sorting out what is yours and what is not. There are a lot of other things to help deal with the empathness. I would also like to suggest Trevor's book "Thriving as an Empath" which has a lot of great advice....a perfect primer for the newly discovered empath.
I am so glad you are coming into your own truth, which is what I believe we are all supposed to do at this time. Remember your are not alone in this journey.
Blessings
GardenTiger
@gardentiger
5 months ago
4 posts

Dear all,

Thank you very much for your answers so far, this is really helpful and I'm very glad I found this community!! I doubt people who are not 'affected' by this would understand. I will definitely check out Trevor's book as at the moment I want to know everything there is to know :) 

I think the two of us do have a strong connection, it's just hitting me so hard because before this, we really did not speak for about 10 years, but I know that he liked me a lot back in that day and vice versa and he even mentioned that he drove out that day especially to try and meet me. Anyway, I know now firsthand what he is going through - he is nowhere ready to meet anybody 'new' in his state of mind - but it's good to know regardless. As I mentioned, I think he is angry/disappointed with me for leaving so abruptly and I may feel this as well, lots of negative stuff. At least I can now be sure this aches are not mine and I can actually deal with it with the techniques.

Thank you also for the tips on ridding myself of these feelings, I will try them out, I try to spend a lot of time in nature so will actively seek that these days.

I also have the impression that we may be able to feel when someone is thinking strongly about us i.e. a lover/husband or a relative/good friend especially etc.  

Thank you, it will be an exciting journey that's for sure but I do feel so much better recently (apart from above problem), I wouldn't want it any other way :)

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