I don't know what to say except I am so sorry that you're going through that right now... The unfulfilling marriage to this whole incident with this guy... The only thing that I would highly recommend keeping some sort of journal for only your eyes and your eyes only. I keep one and that's where my rants go, and any massive thoughts that take over my mind or grab my attention. I've had a much more positive outlook and its helped me tremendously to write this all down every day. My entries are usually 1-2 pages, but, if you do decide to do this, just write until you feel better. I have found myself actually looking forward to going home and writing in this, and I find I comfort myself, and find the advice I need to hear while I'm writing. It's just a thought, but it has helped me LOADS. Best of wishes for you though! I hope it all gets better somehow! We are here for you anytime.