Since your asking for advice, I'm assuming I can speak freely I'm not understanding why you would be willing to change the beautiful soul you are to accommodate a person who lies to you and ignores you? I think the change you seek isn't about accepting this situation or even coming up with ways to accept this situation. Listen Honey, I'm going to be a bit blunt, your sacrificing yourself, but for what? It's not for him, because he has already shown differently, it's for you. Where does YOUR HAPPINESS fit into this marriage?
I used to be like you, I sacrificed my own happiness for a marriage, (not even that because he lied to me and come to find out, we weren't even legally married) but for a man who didn't want to change. He led a miserable life and misery loves company. I meant nothing to him. He tried to get rid of us (the kids and I) a few times but would refuse to actually end it. I never really understood why he would treat us the way he did but not leave. I figured it out later, he wanted to walk away the victim and not look like the heel he actually was. I stayed with him for 9 years and had 2 with him. I wasn't happy and I bent over backwards trying to better a man who didn't want to be better. My reality check came one night when I came home from work and my daughter was in her crib crying. I went to see check on her and she was filthy, had only a diaper on her that was literally falling off of her because it was so full. So I picked her up and went to where my husband was to confront him. He had my youngest son in a carrier with a bottle in his mouth while he was chatting with some random woman on the internet. The house looked like a tornado stuck it and my oldest was hiding out in his room trying to avoid him. I realized at that moment, that not only did he not love me or the kids, but more important, he didn't respect us. Knowing is one thing, but when realization actually hits, it's a whole different ballgame. I knew at that moment I needed to make some changes, for me and for my kids, I knew it would no longer include him. Even though I ended the relationship, he chose to walk away from the kids. When he left, that was the last time he ever saw them and that was 14 years ago. I asked him before he left why he did all the things he did, and his answer " because I thought you'd never leave me". I was floored, I actually caused my own unhappiness trying to save a relationship not worth saving.
Now, I'm not telling you to leave your husband, but I do think you need to take some time to do some deeper soul searching. Marriage is a partnership, if it's one-sided, no matter what you do, no matter what energy you draw in, no matter what spell you cast and no matter how positive you are, it won't change anything, at least for the relationship. It could be good for you on an individual level, but if your trying to change for him, and not yourself, then your spinning your wheels. I think it's important to seriously ask yourself why you are with him? Why are you willing to sacrifice yourself for someone who isn't willing to do the same? What are you needing from him and what is he not giving? And why are you accepting this, the lying and the ignoring? We don't find "the one", we become "the one" but both people need to make the necessary changes to do that. You can't do it alone. I honesty believe that if you add your happiness into the equation of your marriage, your going to see a different perspective. At this point your willing to settle, and I think if you dig deeper to ask yourself why, you will find a strength you didn't even know was there. Self sacrifice and self sabotage is a fruitless en devour, and even though it appears to be selfless, it's quite the opposite. We think we are sacrificing for someone else because they deserve it, but in reality, we do it because we feel like we don't deserve it. We reflect what our needs are inside in hopes to receive it in return, but it's rarely noticed by the other person. This is a journey of self discovery and the things you seek, you must first find within. Once you find that light, that sacred you inside, only then will things begin to change. It often doesn't change the way we expect it to, but it always leads to something even greater. Trust me, I found my soulmate through the person I least expected to find
This journey into the soul is always a difficult one, but well worth the trip, I promise you! We, as people, as human beings were designed to not only give love but to receive it as well. Our exsistance often depends on this exchange, it's what keeps us equal I can't tell you what to do in your marriage at this point, but I am advising that you take some of that energy that you give to him and put it towards yourself. To start putting yourself in the equation and to make the changes for YOU, once you start doing this, things will change, new chapters will open. It could help him to be more honest and to see you differently, it could make him be the man you need him to be, idk, but it may not, but if you are solid in who you are and what you need in this life to fulfill your soul, you will be able to see things in a whole different light. You will feel stronger,more confident and it's THAT energy that pushes and manifests the changes you seek. It's where it all begins. As within, so without.
I hope this helps.