There is something I need to do....but

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Karen
@karen
4 years ago
28 posts

I really don't want to hurt him. He is happy. He thinks I'm happy too. But I am not. I feel a weight on my chest. Everynite I go to bed but unable to sleep. I feel as if I can't breath. The anxiety of overwhelming. And this time it is MY anxiety. Like I said, I don't want to hurt him, but I'm hurting myself.


updated by @karen: 05/10/17 04:48:35AM
Karen
@karen
4 years ago
28 posts

My boyfriend. We split up because he has PTSD and refuses treatment, making it very difficult to have a relationship. He was moving to Vegas. He came back after bringing some of his personal belonging there, telling me he missed me and is staying here. BUT no he won't get treatment. So for my own good I need to tell him that no, he can not live here. I don't want to hurt him but in my gut I know that we can not live together any longer.

Karen
@karen
4 years ago
28 posts

Why do we dance? For me it's because I don't trust my judgements. And I don't like hurting people. And I don't think I'm important. I don't know why.

Karen
@karen
4 years ago
28 posts

Chuck,

You are so right. I know I have to stop. I am an enabler. And I have to say enough.

Thank you so much.

Angel
@angel
4 years ago
607 posts

I had the same issue with my ex. Things never changed after 8 years until one day I woke up and realized that his problems were not my problem. I accepted his problems as my own which then made it our problems, and I was the one who had to be understanding and nurturing while he kept doing what he was doing, so one day I woke up and gave his problems back again and the kids and I walked away. Sure, it gave us a whole new set of problems, but there such freedom in that decision and the best decision I ever made. I am now with the man who literally is the other half of my soul and we are all happy. people come into our lives all the times, more often then not, not for the reasons we think, but it benefits either us or the other person regardless. Life never guaranteed that pain wouldn't be included, but it's a price that gives deeper meaning to everything we do.

Your not meant to save him, he must save himself, you are however, meant to consider yourself as highly as you do others. It's essential. You stay or are bound because your afraid of what will happen to him but will happen if you don't? How many times will he have to repeat the same karmic cycle because we choose to not let go when we know it's time? It's like a child. If we keep our children small, they will never grow to be responsible adults.

You have a very nurturing soul, channel that energy into someone who not only needs it but wants it.

Karen
@karen
4 years ago
28 posts

Angel,

Thank you so much. It really hit home. I know I need to walk away. Or in this case let him move away. And that's what I am going to do. No matter how hard it is for me I am going to let him go. I pray that he will find peace and realize what he needs to do. But in any case, I am not going to hold on to his problems. I have to do that for him as well as myself.

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