Can a Narcissist be an empath?

So_exausted_from_users
So_exausted_from_users
@so-exausted-from-users
3 months ago
41 posts

I just went through a very painful experience where I thought I was talking to an empath.  An empath who I honestly thought was extremely nice, helpful and enlightening but now I am not so sure. After everything that was said it feels like it was a witch hunt. I am still unsure what they wanted but I was taught in school to protect all personal information about those around me, so I was made out to be a horrific monster. Whatever!

I am just extremely sad and disappointed not because of the attack but because I believe they were being sincere in their information about empaths and hopefully help learning to control it. Also I assumed we were connecting as friends which it turns out that I was just a fool to believe a friendship was possible. Lesson learned!

I am still trying to understand empaths as I have only accepted that I am one. Can a Narcissist be an empath? Are there evil empaths? Why would an empath hurt another empath knowing how much we feel? How can an empath supposedly know what another empath is truly feeling when the only thing connecting them is an internet connection at 2 points in the world? The tears have been wiped away and now I just am hopeful that someone has advise on how to protect myself from ever feeling this way again. 

I am looking for other methods than meditation, I know that is the most recommended but I need to learn how to control the empath part before I can master meditation or visualization. Those will be on my to do list to learn next. 


updated by @so-exausted-from-users: 09/05/18 06:49:48AM
krosskelt
@krosskelt
3 months ago
62 posts

In my opinion. Being an empath is something you are born with, it does not stop one from learning to be a narc, a sadist, or anything that might be viewed as evil.

Accepting and learning to love yourself is the first step to becoming an enlightened empath.  I find that when I am having difficulty dealing with others emotions, that one of my chakras are out of balance.  There is such a thing as having a chakra too open and it being over active, so the focus should be on opening closed ones and balancing them all out.  Learn to ground, balance, release or transmute unwanted emotions, and cut cords with toxic connections.

crystalsage
crystalsage
@crystalsage
3 months ago
200 posts
These are things I've tried that have worked for me.

Salt baths
Crystal's
Metallotherapy
Diet change
Cold showers(with focus on the spin, the cold helps energies release more easily)

Sitting with the feelings(hurts like hell sometimes, however it does give the energies the space to do whatever they need to do)

Copper on the back of the neck
Icepack on the back of the neck.
Fasting
Few days off and some solitude if possible
Cbd if possible
Big bowl of fruit
Body cleanse
World fast( no TV, phone, people, food?, no noise for at least 8 hours)

And imagination (creating a safe place or person in you head and being with that moment
crystalsage
crystalsage
@crystalsage
3 months ago
200 posts
Basically I have found that if I get my body into a healthy state physically, than when I get hit with overload it doesn't knock me out.

In fact I'm overloaded today and it's noticeable. However some more recent changes I have made have really turned things around for me.

I was around a lot of pain yesterday and am still around lots of pain this morning and it is taking its toll.

My favorite new addition are my Tibetan healing rings. I feel like these things have opened up a new world. People's outlook toward me has changed as well as my ability to handle the emotional rollercoaster that is being an empath.

Wish you the best.
Karen2
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
3 months ago
977 posts
I got hit with something last night as well while at work...hit me right in the shoulder....that seems to be where all links and connections go to...I was talking to someone who was being a doofus but nothing really bad and wham...hit me hard and not sure if it's from a human or something else.
Anyway narcessist are a type of empath..they use energy just as we do...they're looking for victims,though , to hurt rather than heal...I don't think a lot of them know what they are so are not aware the there are empaths who can detect them...their energy will always tell me what they are as their energy causes me a lot of pain...the best way to heal yourself is to learn how you respond and be sure about you in those instances when you are in their presence...get away as fast as you can...and take time to clear all energy connections they hit you with...it's those connections that transfer their energy to you, that's how they drain one of energy at a distance...pull out the roots from your energy and then relax and take the baths...learning how to do energy work on yourself will help you immensely...
So_exausted_from_users
So_exausted_from_users
@so-exausted-from-users
3 months ago
41 posts
Thanks guys..
There is a lot of interesting information here and non of it has to do with meditation or visualization which I am extremely thankful for.

The first thing I did do when I realized that this person just didn't understand the damage to my emotional state was I blocked them and erased every communication I had with them. Clean break with nothing to remind me of the pain. So yes I agree with everyone that stopping the toxic connection asap was/is extremely important. If only it was as easy to erase it from the mind as it is electrically life would be so simple but hours later it was still eating at me so I am happy my instinct was to ask for help and you guys replied. Thank you.

There is a few things I would love to try but do to health/medical issues I just can't. Cold and my body don't get along at all. The cold hurts the nerve damage in my legs that health problems have created or I would try those methods, they sound as if they could help.
I have very limited control over my diet and due to health reasons I mostly am only able to use doctor prescribed meal replacement and I drink mostly only water with something like pop or juice once every couple of weeks. I can sometimes eat food if it is very soft so for now adjustments to my diet are very limited, but I agree what goes into your body can effect a person lots.
As for disconnecting myself from all noise and people it just isn't an option available for me. Being a mom means sometimes 5 mins of alone time has the same odds of winning the lottery but at the end of the day I wouldn't give it up for anything. My kids are older so I can get breaks but they are at times my biggest frustration however they are always my greatest reward and I would be lost without them even if that means that personal time may not happen. But I do agree disconnecting helps even if it is just grabbing the kids and going for a 10 min walk. I am just worried at times cause I don't want my negative experiences to hurt them. My oldest is a strong empath like me and my youngest is a sensitive. Just learning that I am one has helped explain so much through my life time and with them both as teens at times I couldn't understand where their strong emotions came from, breakdowns over the weirdest things however as I realized the empath in me it clicked like a huge light what was happening with them. They have both always been so close to me but now they realize that they are not alone nor going crazy and everything that they experience is possible a stronger bond has been created between myself and each of them. The oldest feels my pain and I would love to find a way to block the energy I give off as I work through things in my life so I don't hurt them. My youngest picks up on the negitivity energy vibrations and knows when emotional pain is headed towards us. I have done the same thing all my life and I used to swear I was going crazy. If there is a way to help block the negitivity energy vibrations I would love to give that gift to my youngest.

@krosskelt - How do you close your chakras? I know that my heart is the most open and I now feel emotional pain as actual physical pain in my heart. I would love not to actually close it but shrink the amount energy going through it at times. I was give a gift by the universe to have a connection with another person via our heart Chakra's. It is like empath abilities multipled with this person as we both vibrate on the same frequency so I don't ever want to be ungreatful I received this person in my life but there are times I wish I could control the energy from them as we are trying to understand what is happening to us and learn more about each other. I am fully aware that all my chakras are set on fully open, I have just never figured out how to close them so any advice would be great.

@crystalsage - I am into crystal healing and I have them all around me. There are some of wear as jewelery, I have a selection I always carry with me in my pockets. A few years ago the kids and I had the opportunity to go to an amethyst mine and we found a box full of different ones that spoke to us. They are now everywhere in my home including under my pillow. I couldn't believe how much they have helped control the night terrors I have suffered from past trama / PTSD. Is there a crystal that u know of that helps empaths? I was told wearing onyx helps empaths block negative energy vibrations however after several months of wearing both a bracelet and I have a pendant I don't notice a difference in helping block negative energy. I do notice it helps with other areas. I do discharge and recharge my crystals every few weeks.
What is CBD? How do you use metallotherapy? The Tibetan healing rings sounds extremely interesting. I am going to have to look into the costs and how to use them.

@womanwhowalks - I live in my bathtub, the heat helps with the nerve damage. I am wondering what you use in your bathwater to help release the negative energy? Depending upon my mood I have everything from bubble bath to coconut oil to different scented Epson salts. I have even tried scented teas in the water to see if the scents can help with the nerve pain. I can't actually stand the taste of tea but some of the scents are really nice. How do you use the bath to release the negitivity energy. I am thinking since I am in the bath anyway all the time maybe I can get an extra benefit of releasing my negative energy.

Thank you again for your kindness and help...
crystalsage
crystalsage
@crystalsage
3 months ago
200 posts
Black tourmaline
Black kyanite
Jet(which is actually tree fossil but gem stores sell it)
Selenite
Malachite
Shungite

This is pretty much what I use. I place them along the length of my spine, under my feet, in my hands, or around the solar plexus area.

I find them more effective when they are cold to start. Once they get pretty warm I remove them
crystalsage
crystalsage
@crystalsage
3 months ago
200 posts
Cbd is one of the found in marijuana plants.

It's typically used for anxiety/depression or pain. It's not psychoactive, so you can work or whatever else you feel like doing.

@hop-daddy post a link to cbd gummies he found. Because it is taken from hemp, it can be sold anywhere in the US.

There are also topical creams that have some of the same results.
Hop Daddy
Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
3 months ago
933 posts

@so-exausted-from-users:

I think you guys covered this pretty well. But the litmus tests for empaths is that we always think of others before ourselves. Narcs are the opposite, they are always looking out for themselves and what they can take in every situation. But narcs in trying to attract an empath can be quite charming and a bit of a chameleon. They can act like someone else if that's what it takes to ensnare an empath. So you can sometimes have a narc act like an empath early on. But soon enough you'll see them for who they are.

This is not say empaths are perfect angels. We're only human and can have our own selfish moments. But at our core, we're the ones who will give the shirt off our backs to help someone.

On the topic of CBD gummies, they are legal and can ship to all 50 states since the oil is derived from hemp oil. I struggle as an empath with nervous energy from others on airplanes. So I tried these gummies out and they worked really well. I also had them on another day when I was pretty stressed out. They just chill you out and get you a little numb. But its a functional numb where you can still talk and drive. It's very interesting how they work and make you feel. Here's a link:

https://forsundayscaries.com/

crystalsage
crystalsage
@crystalsage
3 months ago
200 posts
Metallotherapy uses how the different metals affect the body, to heal it.

Copper is a popular one. There are many products ,that are meant to ease pain, which contain copper.

I recently bought some rings and bracelets. I was really surprised at how much they helped.

The back of my neck is where energy can get stuck. I have been placing a peice of copper right where my neck and shoulders meet and it feels great. I tried it today while I was overwhelmed and it calmed me down almost instantly. The only problem was that once I removed it the effect only lasted temporarily. Since I had a collared shirt on, I figured no one would notice I taped a peice of copper to my neck.

I began to relax. The tension in my head released. I could just feel my self slowly getting better. I liked it so much I went back and added another peice.

I'm still in the research and experiment phase. I am enjoying what I have been learning.

So far everything I have tried has worked. It's hard to find a lot of info online but it's there.
krosskelt
@krosskelt
3 months ago
62 posts

I'm probably not the best teacher of working with chakras.  What I do is make sure they are open, which anymore they usually are.  I try to balance them and make sure that, in my mind's eye, they are not radiating outside of my body.  I try to keep them about the size of a softball, so they are not overactive unless I need them to be for whatever reason.  To get them to reduce I just concentrate on sharing the energy with any that might be under active, or I let the excess energy flow out when I cleanse my aura.  My understanding is basic and only the little knowledge of how I work with them.

TigerLily
TigerLily
@tigerlily
3 months ago
448 posts
@so-exhausted-from-users you have a lot of a great advice. :)

Eating a well balanced diet
Exercise
Nature
Healing crystals
Baths/being in water
Reiki
Chakra balancing

Are all great go to's.

The pain you are feeling isnt going to go away today or tomorrow but it will pass soon. Im sorry that this had happened today and my heart hurts. If it's a lot right now to bear I'd go and get a Reiki session if you can or some kind of energy healing. Those have always really helped me during stressful times. I started going to bed at night with a few crystals under my pillow. That along with wearing them and a diet has helped me since the weekend. (I had a huge meltdown lol)
Karen2
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
3 months ago
977 posts

Well...what I mean is that 1st you do some energy work to help heal the damage the narcessist has inflicted on you....then take a bath to help heal the wounds...and refresh yourself...I like to use Epsom salts as well...and bubbles...sometimes I'll throw in some herbs...white sage mostly or some cedar...soap wise I found a lovely liquid soap with white sage and for a change liquid soap with ginger and patchouli...I really like how that one works..I love white sage too...I clear my house with a smudge...I don't do it as much i used to...but sometimes after work before bed I'll light one when I'm feeling a bit low...if you want I can help you clear your energy just so you can feel what I mean about removing energy cords at the energy level...and then you can figure out how you want to do that....but sometimes feeling it is necessary to understand....talking about it sometimes isn't enough....


updated by @womanwhowalks: 09/06/18 01:27:55AM
Chrisis
Chrisis
@chrisis
4 weeks ago
43 posts

hello So_exausted_from_users

There is a thing called "cold empathy" which narcs /psychopaths/cluster-bs can display. Sam Vaknin coined the expression. it means, that the narc can see what you are feeling but is not feeling with you or give any care about it. the whole thing with cluster-bs is, that they are cut off from their feelings. So, a narc cannot be an empath, but he or she can be really good at knowing or at least guessing what you are feeling - it is part of their survival strategy. But they don't care about what you are feeling. Sam Vaknin aboud cold empathy:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J09lXzhq5DA  (note about Sam Vaknin: he is a diagnosed psychopath) citation from the video: "the brain is there - the heart isn't"

If you need help to recover from narcicisstic abuse, I recommend Richard Grannon (spartanlifecoach.com). He is also on youtube. He is really good and has a lot of free material online.

hope I could help

Chris

So_exausted_from_users
So_exausted_from_users
@so-exausted-from-users
4 weeks ago
41 posts
Chris,
I will take a look at it.

Hop-daddy,
I was finally able to try the gummies as they only became legal last week. They didn't agree with me and I had nausea. My friend has picked up some other stuff that has no THC and is going to try to make brownies from them incase it was something in the gummies mixture and not CBD that caused it. For medical reasons I have to be really careful never to touch any product with the THC in it. The THC has properties that can interfere with the meds I have to take to keep me alive. I am fully a fan of my meds but with issues in my blood I am even less of a fan of death so the meds win and I research the hundreds of interaction that it has with other products including normal healthy food items like spinach. So I can adjust the meds to be able to have a balanced diet of relax with a drink once a while, other thing I avoid big time. Hopefully the brownies will work better and am looking forward to trying them. I do have an antianxiety med I can take when it gets really bad but I am not a fan of taking then as they do help with the anxiety but can make me extremely sleepy. I would rather have other options. So we are going to do so experimenting with the legalization that just happened.
Fingers crossed that we can find something.

I added some new stones from the list to the ones I carry around. Hopefully they will also help.

Thanks again for all the wonderful advice.
Cat Whisperer
Cat Whisperer
@cat-whisperer
3 weeks ago
780 posts

Kinda late to the discussion on this one but the topic was revived again....totally synchronistic since this has been on my mind regarding my son. Without going into a long discussion about my son’s screwed up past, his narcissist dad has done a number on him....which made me think about @chrisis post above. I know my son has some ability...have seen PK with him firsthand, however, the damage that has been done to him throughout his life has made him display the “cold empathy”. This makes me wonder if he is a damaged empath, or if he is just a narc/socio/cluster b. or a bit of both? He has been diagnosed with bipolar but denies that he needs help. He definitely does not want to ever feel....he buries it deep! Oh the hate and anger that he buries is excruciating. So, yes, it makes me wonder if you can be both, or is my maternal connection with him clouding my read on him? No one ever wants to admit or face the fact that their “child” (he is an adult now) could be so toxic.

Blessings


updated by @cat-whisperer: 10/28/18 01:33:48PM
michelle
@michelle
3 weeks ago
31 posts
@chrisis [and all members]
Chris, the YT video you posted is similar to one by Tom Montalk, titled, "Spiritless Humans."
Some call them Organic Portals. Give it a look:

https://youtu.be/QvSuJHYh1X0
Chrisis
Chrisis
@chrisis
3 weeks ago
43 posts

Hello @michelle

Thank you for sharing the video. There are similairities, but contrary to Tom Montalk, what Sam Vaknin say is, that there has formed something called "the narcissictic shell" inside the human where the true self is hiding (as a surviving response to abuse or trauma) because reallity is too painful. The ego has taken over and is running the show. Healing would be possible if the initial trauma could be resolved, but this is something the most skilled therapists are not (until now) capable to do and the process would be very painful.

michelle
@michelle
3 weeks ago
31 posts
@chrisis

Hello to you and thank you for responding. I think it might be possible for the garden variety narcissist to heal core wounds and at a stretch, maybe some sociopaths, but I am doubtful that any change could come to a psychopath.

I think narcissistic behavior can be formed from early abuse/negelect in some people but a full blown
psychopath has a different brain from the norm. Most of what I read is that 60-50% of formation due to a genetic flaw in brain structure and 50-40% or the triggering is related to the environment. But then again who is telling the storyline to the reseachers but the narc/psycho?

You see, I was a victim of a psychopath. I won't go into details, but I was abducted and beaten for hours before escaping and hiding under a neighbors porch until he stopped looking for me.

My central nervous system was damaged from beating to the head and having my neck snap to and fro. Persistant PTSD was also an effect of this encounter.

An here's another thing that one might not see in your average narc. This man changed into something very evil. I mean this literally. I saw his face shapeshift into something reptilian as he said to me, "Don't worry, I'm not not going to rape you; I'm into bloodlust."

My own experience tells me that "Organic Portals" is a very good description of them.

I would also like to ask if you have used any of the kits sold at spartanlifecoach.com? Because years latter, I am still carrying much of this energy in my body.

I use EFM and heart coherence techniques and Donna Eden's energy work but there is a persistence that I cannot shake. I also see a therapist.

I am using Auralite 23 crystal for healing too.
So_exausted_from_users
So_exausted_from_users
@so-exausted-from-users
3 weeks ago
41 posts
Michelle,
I am so sorry for everything you have been through...
I am a survivor of mental tourcher but I couldn't imagine..
It sounds like you have turned your pain into strength.. That is awesome.
michelle
@michelle
3 weeks ago
31 posts
So_exausted_from_users:
Michelle,
I am so sorry for everything you have been through...
I am a survivor of mental tourcher but I couldn't imagine..
It sounds like you have turned your pain into strength.. That is awesome.

Sweetie, I've always seen myself as a strong person but believe me, I have my days.

I'm 60 years old and that trauma happened when I was 52. Besides the PTSD, I developed Central Pain Syndrome which is a hellish existance where even a loud noise can set off unremitting, excruciating pain.

I healed much of that by reading books on neuroplasticity. Every time I had pain I say there are no more receptors for the pain from my body to lock into...shrinking the pain map. Then I'd envision reds lights across my brain going out.

The other thing that got ramped up was my histamine intolerance....for me this is genetic. This is still problematic and I am experimenting with techniques which will turn this gene off.

I empathize with @cat- whisperer because my son was 16 at the time and I believe he also developed PTSD from seeing what happened to me and as an empath himself, we are bouncing off each other's energies.

He also has histamine intolerance or HIT and this can really mess up neurotransmitters, as it is also a neurotransmitter [among other things] and ramps the other transmitters up.

He cannot process alcohol but continues to do so and can become quite violent. I am on disabilty and he still lives with me as I can't live on my own. He doesn't drink much at one time but I have never seen anyone react to to beer as he does.

The change is drastic in him and I wonder where my sweet son has gone.

So, things are not good nor condusive to healing but I continue to work on myself so that my energy field can once again be calming to him or any other.

If any reading here would send health, happiness and loving thoughts to us, I would be most appreciative.

I find that, for myself,
when doing heart meditations, that the emotion of gratitude...as if I am already healed, works best.

Perhaps this can help you, also.
Chrisis
Chrisis
@chrisis
3 weeks ago
43 posts

@michelle

I'm so sorry to hear what happened to you and I want to apologize if I sounded self-complacent. I was so into my own experience that I forgot how much worse things can get.

I have watched a lot of Richards youtube videos before buying some of the courses. I found all of them helpful.  Do you know Pete Walker?  he wrote books on ptsd, "From surviving to thriving" and "The Tao of Fully Feeling".

michelle
@michelle
3 weeks ago
31 posts

Chrisis:

@michelle

I'm so sorry to hear what happened to you and I want to apologize if I sounded self-complacent. I was so into my own experience that I forgot how much worse things can get.

I have watched a lot of Richards youtube videos before buying some of the courses. I found all of them helpful.  Do you know Pete Walker?  he wrote books on ptsd, "From surviving to thriving" and "The Tao of Fully Feeling".

@Chrisis No need to apologize; we've all been hurt bad. But we all have the ability to be strong. Empaths are here for a very special reason. We're here to transmute energy...for us, for people, for our world. As I heal my stuff, it makes it easier for others. So, we carry on. And right here we find each other to empathize, to share and to uplift. I thank you ALL for being so warm and welcoming...it is a relief to be where I can be myself.🤤

Yeah, I will watch the Yt videos 1st. No, I haven't read the books you mentioned.I've read Peter Levine & others, on Somatic Experiencing; which is very specific to PTSD and physical trauma-related heath issues.

I've read Donna Eden's books on energy healing and some on EFT. Also, many on neuroplasticity.


updated by @michelle: 10/30/18 09:21:53PM

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