Eyes-Judgy

To post a reply, login or signup

TigerLily
@tigerlily
5 months ago
309 posts
Do you all feel by looking in someone's eyes you can tell what kind of person they are? My so called best friend said I'm just judgy. Of course I defended myself and gave examples. I'm taking this as an empathic trait or another type of gift . Would love to hear your stories or experiences around the eyes and that it's not being judgy.
Zacharias
@zacharias
5 months ago
85 posts

Be careful. Many times I have gotten the wrong idea about someone because I was looking at one single aspect I pick up on. As I look deeper I see how complicated people are. It's said "The eyes are the windows of the soul", and it's true, but windows have curtains and blinds. You can only get so much information of the lay out of the inside of a house by looking through the window. If you want to be right in your judgement, they have to open the door and let you in. I would ask that you withhold judgement until you gain their confidence and trust. That's when they let you in, and you get to see more. We have extra information yes, but it doesn't mean your any better at judging them than they are. If you make a judgement find out if your right. 

Personally, I'm not near as accurate as I'd like to be, so I make it a point not too. I find that by understanding them instead I'm able to help them. Think of it this way, we have to feel the judgment of others and we know they are wrong. If you do the same to them then you are no better.

TigerLily
@tigerlily
5 months ago
309 posts
I haven't been wrong yet let's say. It's not that I'm trying or wanting to be judgy, it's the reason why I won't associate with them. It's proven me right every time. Example, The last guy I was with I saw in his eyes that first night i met him he was going to hurt me. I also saw alot of uncertainty
But a good heart. I didn't allow for it to bother me so I waa with him for a while based on that goid heart, and in the end he hurt me pretty bad. Another example, a coworker. Lost and confusion and not very bright I saw. I thought showed me wrong as I did see was kind of bright at doing her job. Well, that was proved wrong again as she tried to get in me trouble, by her not being so bright I had all the necessary documentation to back it up and it backfired on her. Later I heard she just wanted a promotion, which by the lost and confusion I saw in her was where she went the wrong way to get promoted.

Does that make sense? I'm not here to judge them, it's what I see. Do both those people have deep rooted issues in themselves that I cannot see based on that curtain, probavly. It's only helped me recently on who new friends would be or how I am at work.
Zacharias
@zacharias
5 months ago
85 posts

Yep, makes sense. Your using your intuitive perception to figure them out. The more you do, the more feed back you get, the better you are at it. I love it.

Something Buddha said "if you want to know the Truth, hold no opinions"

Something Jesus said "Lean not on your own understanding"

We are perceiving things we don't fully understand no matter how well we think we do. What you pick up on through your spirit you filter through your mind. We add our own judgments. To be right, you have to recognize it and stop it. Why, because it does harm to our spirit.

Raindancer
@raindancer
5 months ago
27 posts

What you say about eyes the window, but there being shutters, yes.  I think of one noteworthy Russian official as you say that.  He has a poker face by intention.  Hard to know someones soul when they are always hiding their hand for political reasons.   Affect, the way a person expresses what they feel on their face, if too constricted has it hidden for how the person is.  If you judge that you can not readily judge another so need to be careful when you can't really see what is there, that is okay.  Sometimes an empath may sense things being hidden have a reason to be hidden.  If you wonder about your judgements on such matters, i can understand.  Not sure if this is at all what you mean as it is what mostly strikes me when you talk about what the eyes would show being hidden. 

Zacharias
@zacharias
5 months ago
85 posts

There's this guy I take to breakfast every Friday. He did something very bad. He got drunk one night and drove the wrong way down the highway til he ran into a guy on a motorcycle. He's going to prison. I started this friendship with him to find out what happened in his life to bring him to this point. 

I had to put away all judgement and show him that I care in order to open him up. When I look into his eyes it's like staring at a blank wall. He has become so disassociated from his emotions he doesn't know what he's feeling. I do now, but not at first. The reason he is so interesting, is that when I met him he had already done the thing he did and had shut down inside. The cover emotions he uses are from an out of control ego. It's not easy to sit there and listen to him talk about things that he should be crying about and yet he stays perfectly calm. Up until the moment when he feels something, then the subject changes. He thinks he's about to lose it, and shuts down again. He learned to do this at around 8 years old. That deep sadness is still there. It's strong. He had a friend that moved away. To him, it was as if he died. Some one probably told him to "suck it up and deal with it". His grandparents died in a car crash a few years ago. He said "I didn't feel anything, is that bad?" I said no, it's normal.

The things you see when you put away judgment are the things you really want to know. His eyes are not draped in a shade, it's a blackout cover. He doesn't want anyone to know what he perceives as weakness. What I see is that little 8 year old boy that can't grow up.

TigerLily
@tigerlily
5 months ago
309 posts
I've met alot of people like that who have that "blank look" in their eyes. Some I did get a good feeling, others not, and some just nothing. I got to know each and every one dispight that judgement of feeling I got as well. After that I learned why I did or didn't like that person initially. This is why I tend to run from those right away, and my friend says it's judgy. Not sure how I'm being judgy when each time I guess I see it right away.

With your motorcycle guy, he sounds a little intense of bottled emotions. How do you handle being around that?
Cat Whisperer
@cat-whisperer
5 months ago
728 posts
In my experience, there is a difference between judging and knowing. They might come across the same on the surface, however, the higher self sees right away if there is something off with s person....you have to go with this for your own protection. I have had several experiences when going with this knowing has kept me safe. I have also tried to warn people of the feelings I get, only to be ignored. For theses people they have found out on their own. Perhaps they were seeing me as being "judgy" also. Probably still do, but in the end my intuition was correct.
Blessings
Zacharias
@zacharias
5 months ago
85 posts

It's very easy. He's a classic narcissist, like my wife of 25 years. These people are easy to be around until they aren't. They feel they have to control you and they work very hard at it. It's how they survive, cause life is hard on everyone. No one gets a free pass to live a life without pain. He responded to the pain by blocking it out, but never learned how to control others. So he drank to socialize. He's just afraid. Most people are. The ones I worry about are the ones that are not.

I do feel his judgement and it makes me sick. I want to say, how can you of all people make a judgement of me? But I don't, cause that IS a judgement. So lets break it down:

A sitting judge is taking in all this information from evidence and testimony, but withholds making a judgement until all the information is available to be analyzed. Then at the end he, or she, comes to a conclusion, and uses a gavel to let it be known the judgement has been made, and so ends the argument.

So it isn't judgement per se that you need to avoid. It's coming to conclusions. In order to understand why you have to look for the black goose. After all, not all geese are white.

I say this to you to spare you. No one wants to be around someone they perceive as judgy. You'll be a much happier person by not judging at all. That doesn't mean you don't read them to understand their motives. Please do, that helps to protect you. Just know it gets complex. They are trying to survive too in the way they know how. We are not about convincing people they need to put up those walls of "self protection". We're about tearing them down. It's all it how you react to what you learn. Try not to, but don't ignore it. Your not suppose to know these things anyway, right? If they think you do they get scared. We have to live in secret for their sake. But don't worry, they'll come around some day.

 Also, this guy is learning humility! I've seen the change happen. He is humbled by all the people that have surrounded  him to help him though this. We do it, because we can't throw people away that make mistakes. If we did, we'd all be in the trash heap. It's just a shame someone had to die for this change to happen. He's been sober for a few months now. He says it's been 18, but I know that's a lie. No one else knows this. I keep his secret without ever letting him know that I know. It's a crazy world.

Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
5 months ago
507 posts

@tigerlily:

For those of us with the knowing ability, looking into someone's eyes is a way of channeling into their soul a bit. I do that often and can really unmask who a person is (reveal the real them as good, bad, or troubled etc...). I can understand why others would be uncomfortable with it because no one likes to be stared at. But those that get the most uncomfortable are either very insecure or have the most to hide. They sense you are unmasking them through looking into their soul and it makes them squirm. 

As an empath we are very different. We are observers. We take the emotional temperature in a room when entering. We often are not the first to engage into conversation in a group setting as our brains tells us to just listen and absorb and analyze the emotion in the air to determine what is happening. As an empath you couldn't help that if you tried. You are not judgy, you are just you being you as an empath. On the flip side, empaths are excellent listeners and often give sage advice and a feeling of calm to others.

Indigo Dog
@indigo-dog
4 months ago
13 posts

I have lost a few friends for being too "judgy" or for just blurting out things I intuited. People don't like having thier private thoughts read. It is embarassing and personal and I was a big mouth. Sometimes their thoughts and feelings are so loud I forget and just start talking about it. Not to be a jerk, but because I am genuinely compassionate and can feel how dominant these topics are in them. I am trying to help, but sometimes I just creep them out. I may come off as canny and weird because I just know stuff, but I come from a pure place of loving intent. It must be tough for people to be around empaths when they want to have secret feelings and thoughts.

TigerLily
@tigerlily
4 months ago
309 posts
Thank you everyone. Now I'm seeing this is more as an empathic trait.

Honestly, I have a hard time looking people in their eyes for this reason! I look away alot, and of course I get from people "I'm trying to hide something" by doing so. Not at all actually. However, Those are the same who say it's "judgy" that im judging. How can i when I see who they are by their eyes? Well if I look long enough I see beyond the shutters and all that inside, and will start absorbing their energies really quick, which actually causes me quite anxiety and disturbences. Unless the person is just genuinely happy then I can't stop laughing.
igor
@neverquittter
4 months ago
13 posts
i tend to be very judgy as well...i mean i tend to see so much, i normally tend to accept everything as pretty normal..and let it go day to day so i dont lose balance. But as a empath judging or not can be tricky...we got to see what is confusion, what is innocence, what is malice and what we can do or let die and move on our way!
Cat Whisperer
@cat-whisperer
4 months ago
728 posts
Indigo Dog:

I have lost a few friends for being too "judgy" or for just blurting out things I intuited. People don't like having thier private thoughts read. It is embarassing and personal and I was a big mouth. Sometimes their thoughts and feelings are so loud I forget and just start talking about it. Not to be a jerk, but because I am genuinely compassionate and can feel how dominant these topics are in them. I am trying to help, but sometimes I just creep them out. I may come off as canny and weird because I just know stuff, but I come from a pure place of loving intent. It must be tough for people to be around empaths when they want to have secret feelings and thoughts.


I can so relate to this, I don't have very good people skills when it comes to socializing so sometimes, like you, things just come out. I don't intend to come off as weird either but it happens. Especially weird when they look in bewilderment as ask how I knew that! I have learned to keep my mouth shut more, but sometimes the issues are so loud it feels like they need to be resolved. I am still working on not talking about stuff unless I am asked for help :/
Rene''
@rene
4 months ago
1,194 posts
I also see into a person by looking into their eyes. I wouldn't call it judgement, but utilizing my gifts. But, if what I see or feel collides with my energy, I will back away.
LoconnorO
@loconnoro
4 months ago
151 posts
For me it's something more than their eyes, it's all sorts things from body movements to the way their voice sounds to their eyes and especially their "vibe" or energy or whatever it is. I've second guessed it so manytimes and every time I regret it. I'll get a feeling about someone and then someone else will see something entirely different and my feeling will usually be right. Or I'll feel bad about judging them or something and end up regretting not listening to my intuition. It's crazy lol, but energy and vibes play the biggest role for me tbh..

Share This

From Our Sponsors

  • intuitive reading
  • empath book