Some of you may have already discussed this situation, so sorry if mine sounds like a repeat...
Over a year a year and a half ago, a guy I'd gone to high school with reached out to me to do a business-related project for him. We were acquaintances back in the day, but grew closer while working on the project and I began to grow intense feelings for him. After months of crushing on him and fantasizing about how blissful our relationship would be, I finally told him how I felt. He said he wasn't sure how to respond. He wasn't mean or disrespectful about it. Finally, I had to be honest with myself and realize that he just wasn't that into me – he was only sexually attracted to me. Even though I very much wanted to sleep with him or at least TRY to sleep with him with no strings attached, I never did... because I knew in the end, I would end up getting heartbroken. I'm more of a relationship type of lady and eventually, I would want more from him than he would be willing to give.
Over the next several months, I slowly ceased contact with him but my feelings for him did not. Recently, while scrolling through my Instagram feed, I saw a photo he'd posted of himself with his new girlfriend. My heart shattered and I cried myself to sleep. Then I was mad at myself for still feeling that way toward someone I knew it wouldn't work out with. We'd never even gone out on a date or anything! But I saw him as my ideal guy. My brain knows better, but my heart hasn't yet followed suit.
I've always been the kind of person who (after admitting that I'm crushing on a guy) falls deep, no matter how hard I try to hold back. It doesn't happen with a lot of guys but it takes a very long time for those feelings to go away, even if I no longer have contact with the person. I confuse myself on whether it's because I've cooked up this hot romance in my head or if there is in fact a deep connection, but it's not meant to be on a romantic, sexual level.
I accept full blame for how I'm feeling. This guy never lead me on. I created this relationship in my head and I suppose it just takes time to heal from that. Has anyone been through this before and do you have any suggestions for moving on? I absolutely hate that I have no control over my feelings right now.
updated by @sensi-sante: 09/22/17 02:17:18PM