This is so tragic and so sad. I can relate to a point. My mother and father started giving my oldest son pain pills when he was 18 because he played high school football and had aches and pains. I told them if he needed meds that I would take him to the doctor and have him check out. I was very mad about it so they would give them to him behind my back. My mother was a precription drug addict. my father is prescribed pills also. Aches and pains of a 18 year old from playing football was an everyday thing. This continued into a drug habit, cocain then meth. He's 27 now and has been clean for 3 months. So yes, it is discussing to see a parent or grand parent promoting drug use. I have lived that first hand. And I think being under the control of a narcissist, like my parents, they will control anybody and everybody they can at any means necessary. So sad though , to feel you have to have control over people to be high on life. To get your thrills. I fought long and hard to get away from my parents then to see my son fall into their grips. My mom is dead now but my father is still alive, pushing pills.It's hard to be the good guy when the bad guys work so hard to make you out to be one.So sorry for his death. and I wish your ex could feel greif like you are going though but attention is the nature of the beast. He's probably sucking all the attention up from his death. I know that sounds hateful to say but I have seen narcissist is action too many time. But, your son is at peace now , peace within hisself. Bless your heart.