What you are feeling is well understood here at the EC. You can freely share any concerns, stories, or experiences you are or have had and know with absolute certainty that someone else is, or has, been exactly where you are and experienced that same thing. You are now Aware of what you truly are , a spirit having a material experience and are one of the Awakened. Here is a link to my YouTube channel 1111 Angels where you will find lots of videos on a wide range of topics ( 11:11, Angels, Lightworkers, meditation) as well as the sublime music of Liquid Mind which is great to play in the background all day long to keep you relaxed and Aware. If we can be of service to you please just post a question and someone will have an answer. Throw some love into the wind. Bing.