I am desperate for advice..

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Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

TL;DR - Have known I am an empath for a couple of years but decided to ignore it until weird things forced me to come here.. key questions I have are can being an empath make the crown of your head tingle and if so what does it mean? Have you ever heard a voice when no one was there? I would also like to hear any advice you can offer on where to START exploring this "gift" that feels more like a curse. I would appreciate you taking the time to answer what you can even if my post is too long for you! :)

Now, for those of you who prefer the novel version..

I guess you could say realized I am an empath about two years ago. I stumbled upon an article and thought huh, this sounds like me. Then google led me here, where I lurked on the forums for awhile before deciding to push the idea aside and proceed with life. I did this for a few reasons... 1. The things I feel make me feel like I am crazy. 2. I am afraid of where this will lead me if I try to explore it. 3. I have never really been a spiritual person and wouldn't know where to even start. So I decided to just keep living my life as I did for the 30 years before I knew and that's what I've done. I'm starting to think that was a bad call. Something is happening to me and I could really, really use some answers. I am depressed, but not suicidal kind of depressed.. just really unhappy with a lot of anxiety. It has really been interfering with my life and relationships lately. I've been experiencing some really weird things that I can't ignore and I need to know if any of your have experienced these things and what I should do.

I am a married stay at home mother of four. I don't sleep much at night. At night, I feel at peace and energized. Everyone is in bed and my house is quiet. I try to sleep but I just can't settle my mind and relax. So routine for me is to finally catch an hour before I have to be back up to get the big kids on the bus, then another hour before the baby wakes up, and then a 2 hour nap with the baby mid-morning. This is horrible. I'm exhausted all the time. About a week ago I was trying to clear my head on my pillow about 2am. I think I was between awake and asleep, in that stage just before you drift off. Suddenly I heard a voice. It was a male voice, but it was not my husband. I have replayed it over in my mind so many times that it's hard to even describe the voice now, but it wasn't scary. It was just a normal voice with a very flat, non emotional tone. And it said, very cleary, "someone is in the hospital". My eyes popped open instantly. I might have been asleep and it might have been a dream, but I heard it either way. I worried for hours, not about the voice but about WHO was in the hospital. To sum it up, morning came and no one close to me was in the hospital. So I kinda let it go. Then two days later I found out a cousin by marriage who I don't talk to often is in fact in the hospital on life support.

Ok, the night after I heard the voice my head started to tingle in the crown. It's sort of a pins and needles kind of feeling like you get when your foot falls asleep and it's in a very limited area, about the size of a softball around the crown of my head. It has been doing it every day since, though it has been less today. It isn't constant, but it happens for several minutes several times a day. I also started having very strange dreams (again) the night this started. Dream interpretation has always been a hobby.. so I looked up the meanings. Every single random thing in these dreams over a span of several nights all pointed to basically the same thing, some sort of spiritual enlightening or wisdom.

Since this latest series of events have taken place, my anxiety has kicked into overdrive. I don't know what to think or what to do. I really need some help. What does all this mean? Do empaths hear voices or have premonitions? How can I get some sleep? Can being an empath make my head tingle? I admit that I have a secret fear that I really am crazy because there's a tumor in there and that it's ME who will be in the hospital! :( Any questions you can answer or advice you can offer would be greatly appreciated. But please remember that I am new to all of this and might have to have things dumbed down for me. I really tried to shorten this up as much as possible. So there are other things that have been happening as well and lots of details I left out. So please feel free to ask me any questions that could help you help me. I would be glad to answer them. I am scared. I'm not even 100% sure I am an empath or if I am something else. I don't know what to do.


updated by @ash2016: 01/23/17 05:47:41AM
Goodenergyhealing
@goodenergyhealing
last year
373 posts

I am pretty sure I have had tingling on my crown. And sometimes there is a lot of activity there, it feels like, as energies are going in an out (the crown chakra is our main connection to the Divine, or higher concepts in general). It could be that you kind of 'signed up' to become more aware and spiritually active at this time, before you were born? - Not a doctor, so I cannot comment extensively on it being anything more physical. Obviously if you do start getting pins and needles anywhere else, problems with vision, or any paralysis, do go for a check up! And even if you are too worried now. And or google brain tumor symptoms....

You might also want to google  - ascension symptoms, or the like. I e.g. had a few times that I would work on some energetic system of mine, like the Hara, or Kundalini, and end up with pain in my spine for two days after (felt like an energy system upgrade). But I have been meditating for years, so I rarely get worried about such symptoms. As for empaths being psychic too, that seems quite common. As empaths we are definitely clairsentient already.

As for hearing voices - I can communicate with voices in my head, if I want to. They are usually just too unreliable though, so mostly I suppress them. I have found that with any spiritual communication it is good to keep the same attitude as with listening to something humans might say - just because someone claims something, does not mean it is necessarily true. A general rule of thumb is that voices from 'good' sources will obey your free will, and leave, if you ask them to. Whereas voices from other sources may stick around . One has to then potentially call in on divine guides and protectors to get rid of them. (but it does not sound like that is your problem at the mo)

Being more at peace at night seems relatively common with most spiritual people and empath I know. I reckon it is because so many people are sleeping, and creating less stressed energies. I often feel more energized and at peace on weekends too, even if I am working.

Hope all that has put your mind a bit at rest.

I'm attaching a link to a blog of mine, that contains my so far gathered wisdom re empathy - http://empathcommunity.eliselebeau.com/goodenergyhealing/blog/1511/my-empath-experiences-and-empath-tools-for-healing

Paul
@paul
last year
916 posts

Well, you are at the right place. There is an empathy survival program that will help. There are very talented people here you may wish to pick their noodle about. Welcome

Cat Whisperer
@cat-whisperer
last year
726 posts

Welcome to the EC Ash2016! It's sounds like you are an empath....you are not crazy. When I discovered that there was a name to the things that I was experiencing I did a lot of research/reading to learn more about what was going on. I suggest that you do some reading and research. I highly reccoment the book Thriving as an Empath by Trevor Lewis and Abbigayle McKinney. Trevor is a member here, his book is a great place to start learning how to manage your ability. 

I have had some of the same experiences happen to me...voices, tingling, odd sleep patterns. I also see people's faces when I close my eyes. Yes, it can make you question your sanity, but rest assure you that it is all related to your gift. And as Good mentioned, possibly Ascention...which is something more and more people are experiencing at this time. If you are really concerned about your health, get checked out by a doctor. I have went through the same worries too, however, each trip to the doc netted no physical issues. Now I chalk up a lot of my aches, pains, and ills to spiritual "growing pains". I know this sounds hokey but I will ask Source to ease the pain, and it subsides....unless it is really physical. If it is, when asking it will not subside. That has been my usual "test" to see if I'm really sick or not.

Blessings

Rene''
@rene
last year
1,194 posts

Hello,   I ,too,  have problems sleeping and have to take meds to help me sleep.   I usually just have visions, some very strange but have recently started being  awakened by my husbands voice, but it's not him.   This has been going on a couple of weeks , then my 3 year old granddaughter who lives with us woken me up one day last week and said "papa found my earring". (She had lost a week before).   After we was up and stirring around I looked to see where he had put her earring but didn't see it anywhere so later that day I ask him where did he put her earring and he said he hasn't seen it and I told him what she had said and he said no, he didn't tell her that.  So I ask her when did he tell her that, she said he woke her up and told her that.  It's not unusual for her to experience things that I experience , she also hear the same things I hear when no one else in the room hears it and she will ask me what was that.   

It use to worry me also when I would hear and see things but after I realized it was actually a spiritual thing and not an insane thing, I'm good with it.   Because what I see and hear has nothing to do with my life but someone else.   

Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
last year
502 posts

Ash2016,

I feel for you as I just went through about 6 years of similar misery and desperation. Being a mother of kids makes it extrta hard for you because of those demands on top of being an empath. Being an empath is who you are, your life path. You have no choice, you have to accept it and learn how to manage it. The more you ignore it, the harder life will get for you. I only discovered by accident a year ago that I am an empath. Before that I was your typical skeptic guy, and I would have laughed at this mystical stuff. But for the past 6+ years I have dealt with severe anxiety and had a terrible time sleeping. And just an overall sense of negative and exhaustion and burnout. I used to be such a positive person. And after years of struggling with this, I became a pessimist and a bit of a hermit as I all of a sudden hated going out and being around crowds. It impacted all my relationships and almost cost me my marriage until I figured it all out.

My life is much happier since I have embraced this. All of a sudden many puzzle pieces in my life are falling in to place. For so long I thought I was losing my mind. My first piece of advice is to accept that this is who you are and start learning about this. You are a sponge for negativity as an empath. And you need to learn how to ground yourself (rid yourself of negativity). That takes time and practice. 

I think the biggest thing to make you feel better is to have you get regular sleep. You must get at least 7 hours a sleep a night to recharge in my opinion. If you don't you will start off your day feeling low and really pay the price. You will find that even if you don't have negative people around you during the day, you still feel it everywhere like it is in the air. And you have to fill up your tank eazch night with proper sleep in order to deal the next day. I find taking Tylenol Simply Sleep really helps (its Benadryl). You can also find quite a few natural sleep aids that contain melatonin that will help at your local store or Amazon. I steer clear of the prescription stuff myself. But as a last resort you could have a doctor prescribe you something.

The other advice I would have is that there are objects that can help you ground the negative that is tearing you apart. I've had an additional problem in my house with ghosts harrassing me at night. I started putting out bowls of rock salt in my bedroom as I read that neutralizes negativity and it has improved that problem considerably with the nice side effect that it blocks negativity from the living as well. And you will probably find crystals to be very helpful in grounding you. Most empaths will tell you that black tourmaline crystals do a pretty good job of absorbing negative around you. I have had good success keeping a couple of those in my pocket during the day and under my pillow at night (or nightstand). I am a much happier person as a result. You can find black tourmaline bracelets in a local crystal store or online at Amazon.

A book that I found that really helped me sort all of this out and understand who I am and how it all works was "The Reluctant Empath" by Betty Comerford. You can also get that on Amazon.

Best of luck to you. You will start feeling better as you accept who you are and learn how to ground. But in the meantime, start taking care of yourself. Get some sleep!

Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
last year
502 posts

One more comment I wanted to make on the voices. It could just be exhaustion and your mind playing tricks when you doze off. It could also be a message from someone. I am not yet at the point where I understand the whole angel/spirit guide thing. But this could be one of your guides presenting to you to cause you to look in to this. That may be the reason why you found this website- for help.

I have personally discovered that being an empath makes you more attractive to spirits/ghosts. They will find you. And sometimes they present to you in your dreams. I have several times had ghosts speak in my ear while sleeping that was so loud it woke me up and startled me. I never see the ghosts but I do hear them. I've even had ghosts during the day mimic voices of my kids or wife calling for me across the house when I know my family is not at home. I hate that as it freaks me out thinking someone must have been in an accident. Anyway, I don't know if this helps zero in on what happened to you. But like I said previously, if you are as exhausted as you sound, you are super low right now and are subject to all sorts of intense & crazy things & negativity. Get some sleep with sleep aids and I think you will not only calm down but some of this scary voice stuff should go away.

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Thank you all so much! I checked into the ascension symptoms and I can relate to almost everything on the list. So I will definitely do more reading on that. One thing one the list that stood out is warmth in the crown. It sometimes comes with the tingling. I actually had my husband feel my head while it was going on and he could feel the heat.. it felt like I had a slight fever, but only in the crown while the rest of my head was normal temperature. I meant to include in my original post that I googled this tingling soon after it started. I found several health problems that can cause it, but I don't have the other symptoms that go along with those illnesses. It does worry me that it could be something else, but I also find comfort in the fact that I had an MRI on my brain with and without contrast a couple of years ago (due to migraines) and nothing was found. What really amazed me though is that when I googled it my TOP result was a link about empaths and the chakras. This is the only time I have ever seen anything spiritual pop up ahead of medical stuff and I felt as if I had been led there. I've also looked over the empath survival program. I think maybe my next step should be to try those techniques and see if it helps? 

I am so new to all of this.. there seems to be a lot of meditation and visualizing things involved and I have zero experience with those. I have never meditated and truly don't even know how to. So I might be bugging you guys with a ton of questions!

Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts

Hi. ...welcome...your crown chakra is opening or is open....and your experiencing what is called Clairaudience which is my strongest gift. ...and yes I hear...well.. a number of voices/spirit....it's quite scary the 1st time it happens since the society today seems to think it's all a mental illness...which it isn't....so i'm glad you made it here before going thru that phase...

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Hop-daddy, I didn't see your response until I posted mine and the page refreshed. I agree that exhaustion is playing a huge part in some of this.. I can't even think clearly most of the time and I have to use the energy I do have to take care of the kids. It's hard for me to take sleep aids too. I've always been very sensitive to them and they seem to put me in a coma until morning, which doesn't work out well with a 6 month old because I'm afraid I won't hear him. The ghost thing terrifies me and, if i'm honest, it's the main reason I turned away from this a couple of years ago. I've always had a strong fear of the paranormal and am afraid if I explore this I will open up something that I can't stop. I will say I have seen ghosts before. The house I lived in until I was 10 years old had shadows that roamed our hallway at night. I would see them pass my bedroom door often. Then we moved and it stopped until we moved again when I was in my teens. I didn't see anything there but I heard things all the time. I also saw a little boy in a cemetery around that same time. All of these things are the reason I am so afraid of it.. it has been freaking me out from an early age!

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Karen2, do you have the tingling sensation as well? I have considered mental illness myself! But I am a very sane, very rational person aside from this. I also didn't feel like the voice was "in my head" either.. it sounded like someone was there talking into my ear. It wasn't loud or a whisper, just a normal tone that sounded very real. 


updated by @ash2016: 09/22/16 12:23:30PM
Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
last year
502 posts

I think you are seeing ghosts as a kid was an early sign you were an empath. I know its probably a lot to swallow. I was raised christian and was taught heaven and hell (no in between). My daughter is 12 and is also an empath. She sees ghosts really clearly. They stand over her bed at night and scare the crap out of her. I see things out of the corner of my eyes, but as soon as I look they are gone. However, I hear things all the time. I will will walk down a hallway at night and the ceiling above me will sometimes sound like there is a hand slap with every step I take. And I occasionally hear voices. I used to think that houses were haunted from past death events. Except that I built my house on vacant land and we have all sorts of stuff going on. Through experience and research I have come to the conclusion that as an empath, ghosts will seek you out. Its is scary at first but then I've gotten used to it.

Someone gave me advice to put bowls of rock salt with water by your nightstand. And I have to say it really works. There is now very little spooky stuff in my bedroom at night and I seem to be getting more restful sleep. Just remember to dump out and refil the bowls every 3-4 days as the salt loses its effectiveness over time.

Another big tip for you on feeling better is to take a rock salt bath at night or when you are feeling down. Salt is really important for empaths. It strips the negative off of you and gives you an energy recharge. I soak at night while meditating and am really relaxed and feeling light before going to bed.

Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts

Yes...the tingling is the vibrations when energy ruffles your Chakras. . .I get it in every chakra.....the Chakras are one huge interconnecting system where if not all are open and functioning properly...one gift can work better than others....Clairaudience gift comes from the throat chakra which is blue....so yours seems to be working fine....the energy is sent thru the throat chakra like a transistor radio and turned/ interpreted into speach. .....the person who speaks to you is not imagination. ....but a real person....and is there to help you....try speaking to this person as you would a visible person...and see he'll respond....it takes time and patience....and you are most definitely NOT mentally ill....not in the least ....lol  

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

I was also raised that way. It's weird though because I have heard many stories from my grandmother and aunts about seeing things that can't be explained. Though it seemed there solution was to get scared and run away. So that has always been mine as well. Would epsom salt baths give the same results? A few weeks ago when anxiety was really torturing me I forced myself to make time for a 30 minute bath each night for a week straight to try to help me relax. I used epsom salt then and I think I got better sleep that week than I have in months. I stopped though because due to my busy life with the kids I have to skip other tasks to make time for that half hour bath.. maybe I should try rework it back into my schedule on a regular basis.

Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
last year
502 posts

I agree with what @karen2 said. You are not mentally ill. You are just really fried right now. I personally think you are so exhausted from lack of sleep that you are hyper sensitive. And all your empath stuff is very intense. I had the same problem. Once I started getting sleep and grounding, it slowed the bad parts of being an empath down. I would get a little bit each day instead of all at once.

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Well it's always good to know I'm not crazy! lol it's funny that you say it's blue. I have no idea if this even means anything, but those dreams I was having were FILLED with BLUE! My daughter is a tom boy and rarely wears dresses. When she does they are very simple and plain. Yet, in one of my dreams she had on a light blue dress that was completely covered in dark blue bows of every kind. Some were ribbons, some were even bows that you stick on Christmas packages.. but all blue.

Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
last year
502 posts

Epson salt will relax your muscles but won't do anything spiritually since that stuff is mostly magnesium. And don't use table salt. Use a cup or two of rock salt (available at any store). I also sprinkle a little Himalayan salt in there as well. It will feel like the ocean. I also use salt scrubs in the shower if I'm having a bad start to my day before work. That's like a mini fix when I'm in a hurry. 

Most empaths love dipping in the ocean for the same reason. Its like cleaning your spirit.

Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts

Lol...my family simply refuses to even CONSIDER there are other...well....realities....out there...lol...epsom salt baths are excellent for relieving stress....my heritage is Canadian Indian. ...my heritage and spirit ancestors are what kept me alive with instructions....as the aboriginal people  are very spiritual as opposed to religious...this gift runs in my biological family....i'm not religious....and the spirit world is very real....learn about the Chakras and what they do....and how to open them and take care of them....there are lots of informations and techniques out there....you anxiety is probably due to all the extra energy you're taking in....as an empath you'll be taking in LOTS ...so taking care of your sleeping patterns and getting a continuous 8 hour sleep without waking up would be best ...

Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts

I took a sleeping pill...zopiclone...I think that's how it's spelled....it's a fast acting pill....within 10 minutes you'll be asleep....and it keeps you asleep for a full 8 hours...deep too...so be sure your in bed before you take it ...don't have to take it everyday... but when you really need the deep sleep.....it doesn't have any side effects...if your on any kind of seious meds you should ask your dr if it's compatible of course...


updated by @womanwhowalks: 09/22/16 01:02:24PM
Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

I will pick up some rock salt and give it a try. Can I mix it and the epsom salt in the bath? I would like to keep using the epsom salt too since it relaxed me so well. Karen, my husband is very skeptical as well so it makes it difficult to get him on board with helping me make time for these things. He understands the stress and anxiety part and is very supportive, but not so much when I go beyond that when I'm talking to him. He doesn't say anything. He listens. But of course I can tell that he doesn't buy any of it. I didn't tell him about the voice until after I found out the cousin was actually in the hospital. He didn't say much, but I could tell that he was shocked and looked at it a little differently that time. So I'm hoping he will come around.. it makes it difficult when I can't even share it with the one person I share everything with. 

The weekend is coming and that's when I can get the most/best sleep. He's off on weekends and usually handles the kids so that I can sleep in and "catch up" on my sleep. Maybe I can take something to help me sleep deeper while he's with them and hopefully start working towards a better routine by the time Monday rolls around. All of my kids are asleep by 10. So I have the time available for sleep.. I just can't. So first priority is finding a way to make it so I can.

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Oh, on the subject of stones.. I have a set of several stone charms for a necklace that I've never used. I'm not sure which ones I have, but I know I have tigers eye, jade, and labradorite. Can any of those help any of this?

Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
last year
502 posts

Mix in whatever you want. The Epsom salt will help relax your muscles and make you physically feel better while the rock salt will soothe your soul. Some people also add in oils like lavender.

One note I want to add for your husband comment: He needs to help you with understanding and getting regular sleep. This is like a debilitating disease without proper sleep. My wife got a little frustrated with me sleeping in more. But she now understands I am a way better person for her and the kids when I get my sleep.

I read that 85% of empaths are women. I'm not sure if that's true. But I do know that men are typically not in touch with their spiritual side the way women are. My wife in the past would always talk about guardian angels and spirit guides and I would roll my eyes. We were musing the other day about how ironic that a person as skeptical as I was ends up being an empath. My point is, it probably won't come natural to him to understand. And in some cases it is scary for him to consider that this stuff is real. I would just suggest you ask him to be understanding as you look in to all of this. And when you come out the other side as a better, calmer person, I'm sure he will get it and accept it by then. 

Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts

Yes....I quite understand when you have ppl in your life who are not understanding the changes your going throuch ..and it IS a big change for you ...and it takes time...and it's extremely annoying and kind of hurtful when you try to explain things and they just SIT there looking at you as if your a freak... or in my parents' case exchanging these long looks that tell me they think i'm nuts....lol...so I don't tell em anything ...not anymore....lol...your husband will just have to suck up the changes your going thru...because you will experience so many things that even he can't explain...so...this is going to be kind of a test for both of you....but hold your ground...if your in need of extra time for yourself say so...he may work outside the house...but you work as well at home....and you have every right to insist you need more down time....if your family is avaliable to look after the babies for half a day or 1 day a week...etc....as for the ghost stuff....yes you will experience more spirit/ghosts......I love it personally. ....lol...and have no fear....some of my own spirits offered to come and clear your house out a bit...cause it needs it....I have spirit in my home quite regularly. ..they exist so why be afraid?...but that's me.  Lol

Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts

And now you have a HUGE group of ppl to turn to when you need some help....and we're always happy to help....lol

Jenstone
@jenstone
last year
72 posts

Hi Ash, 

Like you I am just now deciding to explore this "Empath" path, after putting it off and pushing it away for many years for the exact reasons you state! Your journey sounds very similar to mine, married, babies, kids, naps, sleep-deprivation, tingles, uncanny coincidences that really seem more like psychic experiences. I also explored that I was manic depressive, or had some other crazies going on. My take on that is that this stuff (clarvoyance, energy sensing, intiuting the pain and emotions of others) CAN actually contribute to mental illness if we don't stop, observe, accept, breath, and identify and manage things. I love how GoodEnergyHealing talks about how any voices you hear should be treated the same as when people are speakign in the awake physical world. Test them, choose to follow or not. You aren't obligated to anything just because you listen.

I was so blessed, lucky, whatever, to have lots of love and support during my childhood and lots of stable smart spiritually open people in my friendships, that I did not "Go Crazy" but I think I could have! 

Once I was experiencing tingles from the top of my head down my shoulders and down my arms. I went to the doctor, and she said.... there are no physical problems, but I believe that you are manifesting the condition from which the saying "one's skin is crawling" comes. And you should examine carefully what is going on your life and take action. I don't want to go into detail about what happened in an online forum, but by the following year, I was divorced, and had moved 250 miles away from my husband (who I now understand to be a sociopath.) 

There was a time before western science culture that people listened to their skin and their bodies for information. So part of this is just your awareness of yourself. And I think that when you are in the window of bringing new humans into the world, your senses in this arena are heightened. Of course they are! Your mama instincts are real! They are real! And they are necessary. Listen to them, observe, record, don't judge! 

After leaving my husband (which was against my religious upbringing etc.) I went to law school, became an attorney, worked with international populations and started sensing things about the world, like not just ideas or fear but actual pre-cognition of the terrorist activity in various countries etc. I spent lots of time on vicarious trauma therapies and counseling. 

Recently everything came to a head

Over the course of my life, I have had close contact with unsually high numbers of two types of people 1) Narcissists/Sociopaths and 2) People who say I healed them or changed their life. My recent attraction of sociopaths involved being pursued by a man under investigaion for murdering his girlfriend and a client who threatened to kill me and chased me through the streets of my city in his car. Within a week of that I had a man I met in a hotel lobby, write me a letter and say that he experienced a "healing" in speaking with me. Following this I had about a week where I was interacting with electricity, i.e. turning nightlight off and on, and seeing what other people were reading on their kindle (others were able to observe and confirm that this was happening and so I didn't feel so crazy). Anyway, after the encounters with the sociopaths I thought there must be something that draws them to me and me to them and I did some research, and found out that Empaths give to Sociopaths exactly what they need--- unconditional empathy and focused energy and Sociopaths give to Empaths, a break, because Sociopaths aren't so full of confusion because they are only thinking about themselves ha ha... Anway. That was my journey and I believe that if I didn't identity that I am an Empath, then I may have unknowingly gotten myself hurt or killed, because before understanding the energies and tendencies I just walked blindly into situations.

Wow. long post... hope it helps to hear another's journey, Ash, it helped me to hear yours and your resistence to it. Thank you and Hugs!  

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Karen and hop-daddy, thank you both for continuing to talk with me about this! It really helps. I should clarify that my husband does generally give me what I tell him I need. He is very supportive and, not to brag, but much better than my friend's husbands when it comes to taking on more responsibility with the kids when he is home. It's just that I know he won't understand the "why" I need it. I can't expect him to because I don't fully understand it myself. For now, I think I will just approach it like I need these things because of my stress, depression, and anxiety.. because that's really what it boils down to in the big picture. I'm just gonna leave out the other stuff for the time being so that it doesn't confuse him about my sanity...lol

Can either of you offer advice on not picking up his stuff? Because I'm beginning to think this is a big problem for me too. With him, I always know exactly what his mood is even from just speaking to him through text. It's so strong with him that sometimes I have to remind myself that I can't read his mind...lol He is really stressed himself. We are not in the best situation financially at the moment and it's very hard on him since he brings in the only income. So he comes home stressed and irritated a lot. I have noticed that sometimes I can be in an "okay" place emotionally until he comes home. Then it's like all of a sudden I'm irritated when I have no reason to be. He doesn't irritate me. I love him to pieces and look forward to seeing him every day, but I still get the same irritation a lot for no reason at all. So I have to assume I'm taking on his feelings when this happens. It causes me to be snappy with him, which only makes things worse. So that is something I really need to learn to control if it's possible.

Jenstone,  thank you so much for sharing your story with me! It gives me hope. I have been left with no choice but to accept that this is who I am, though I still have doubts at times and a lot of fear. But I know I have to explore it and see where it leads me. It's interesting that you say narcissists and sociopaths are attracted to you. I spent a few years married to a narcissist when I was younger (now my ex-husband) and I have always found it incredibly weird that he seems to be the only person in my entire life who I didn't see through from the beginning. He was poison in my life, but I totally missed it and hung on every word he said. I've never been so naive with anyone else but him and I've never figured out why.

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

I just got word that my cousin (who I believe the voice warned me about) passed away. I'm not sure how to feel. I've never been good at dealing with death. I wasn't very close to her, but am I so saddened by her passing. Today was her birthday.. she came into the world on this day and left it exactly 33 years later. She left behind a 12 year old daughter who my heart is really aching for at the moment. At the same time, I feel at peace knowing that her long road of suffering has ended and she is no longer in pain.

Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
last year
502 posts

ash2016, are you my twin sister separated at birth? Your life struggles mirror what I've been going through recently. First off, you may find comfort in knowing that you and your husband may be blocking your own financial success through your unhappiness. And much of that comes from not taking charge of your empathy. If your personal life seems out of whack, you can probably understand how that could carry over to your financial success. Your husband doesn't sound spiritual but despite that he plays a bog part. Once you take care of yourself and understand your empathy, you will be happy. And from there, things are less of a struggle and your marriage will likely be better. And don't be surprised if at that time, your finances also magically get back on track. You may have accidentally as husband & wife created your own bad luck.

My wife is pretty spiritual and does understand this stuff. I think for a while part of her didn't 100% believe what I said was going on. But then she say me deal with some pretty mysterious things first hand. But she has her bad days and I of course as a guy find unique ways to accidentally upset her every once in a while. I pick up on all of that. For the longest time I would feel her pain and then get frustrated and angry. And as an empath you should know that when you feel hurt or upset, that negative energy you produce comes back at you three-fold. You can literally be your own worst enemy. I have found that having crystals on me at all times has helped mellow out any negative mood my wife may be pushing at me. It helps. Now when she gets ticked at me I just give her a friendly laugh and tell her I'm not buying what you're selling. The black tourmaline seems to work well for me in taking the negative down a notch.

It sounds like you are exhausted and confused. I like you didn't want to believe this stuff. But its real and the faster you deal with it the better you will feel. No one can think clearly when exhausted (that goes double for an empath). Get more sleep, do the salt baths, and try to meditate or use breathing techniques through the day to expel the negative that you pick up. I think the crystals are very useful and I'm still learning on that subject. Consciously try to be more loving and happy with your husband. And I think you'll likely see him respond in kind. I would probably spoon feed him info on what you are dealing with right now as he probably can't handle it and will think you are crazy. He doesn't need to know why you are relaxing in the bath or wearing crystal bracelets. But once you see an improvement in you that makes your relationship better, you can start to explain to him what you are doing as an empath to ground yourself and be happier. He'll see the results first hand at that point and will probably be more open to hearing what you've been up to.

Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts

I'm so sorry for your loss....but she'll never be far from you or her family....she'll always be there....she's at peace....as for your husband there are a few things that happen...one is he's tired and because he is he himself picks up energy from his Co workers and while on the job....I myself do all the time....also your connected to him thru an energy link...you have them to your kids...to your parents...to your friends...etc...you now have one to me....I felt you connect earlier....your picking up what's in his energy via these links....this is another aspect to the energy thing and being an empath....when he's home he's no longer in your immediate space so it clears out...when he comes home he brings it all home in his energy and it invades your calm space....so...the trick is to clean his energy/aura when he first walks thru the door...so you get a minimal amount of residual energy he's bringing home....and because you yourself are tired...but also more open...for you it's triple energy coming into the house and it's like getting blasted with a very loud speaker....I have a spray I make that works very well....what I usually do if I know someone...is coming over i'll spray the doorway ....just open the door and spray everywhere ...before they walk thru the door....I drive a bus for a living would I eno unter LOADS of people who carry crap in their energy. ...I spray my bus before I take it off of the tracks...it's an herbal mixture and quite easy to make...you need one spray bottle...water....white sage...ceder...and sweetgrass....fill the bottle with water...then add the herbs....let sit for a bit...then spray to your heart's content....you can also steel these herbs in warm water....just not in a plastic spray bottle....then just add water when the bottle gets low....I spray my uniform....my shoes...I spray everything....and It works. ....

Cheshire Cat
@cheshire-cat
last year
1,185 posts

Hi all,

   Someone in this thread mentioned two OTC drugs used for sleep. I just want to make you aware that new research shows that all anticholinergic drugs (this includes Benadryl), are associated with causing dementia when taken long term. In addition, recent research shows that acetaminophen (Tylenol) suppresses empathy! Nope, I'm not kidding....look it up! It shocked me too. 

   Melatonin in low doses, L-theanine, lemon balm, passionflower, GABA, valerian (if you can stand the smell),  chamomile (if you're not allergic to ragweed) or various combos of them, are natural ways to help get some sleep. If you are depressed, L-tryptophan in high doses, like one gram at bedtime, will help you get more deep, restorative sleep, just make sure you don't eat for at least 2 hrs. before taking it, and do not take it if taking antidepressants. (I studied for 2+ yrs. towards a Dr. of Naturopathy degree).

    This is a really interesting thread. I too have constant tingling in my crown area, especially at night, and have heard a voice in my head on 3 occasions, either telling me about something that was about to happen, or something that just did happen that I needed to know about. I assumed they were spirit guides, but don't really know. 

   I too have had an MRI, as well as a BEAM scan, a Neuropsychological evaluation, and carotid artery studies, but all that was found was some brain damage and hypo perfusion of blood in certain areas of the brain consistent with the usual findings in fibromyalgia, which I have. None of those areas is near the crown. 

   I do feel these abilities can drive us into mental problems if we aren't in control of them. I have become very depressed, anxious, self-isolating (since I don't like what I pick up from most people and can read their hidden agendas, whether I want to or not, and I also seem to scare some people away now, since I find it impossible to force myself to play social games). Isolation is the number one non-physical predictor of early death, so it's no joke. (I'm a psychiatric social worker). It's more important than smoking, drinking, obesity, etc. People are meant to be in tribes. During most of our history, isolation meant death, so it causes the person to become hyper vigilant, and thus they are constantly anxious. 

   Sorry to go on so long. I meant to throw in my two cents, and ended up putting in a quarter, lol.

    Cheshire Cat

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Thank you hop-daddy! You never know.. maybe we knew each other in a previous life. :) He is definitely NOT spiritual. His mother, however, claims to be a bit of a psychic. I've never really seen proof of that with her though. I do think she has some ability, but maybe hasn't fine tuned it in the way that she should've or something. Anyway, he rolls his eyes and laughs at her advice sometimes lol he is a wonderful man though, very loving and a rare find. I can feel things in him that I don't believe he even knows is there. I also feel an emotional wall that I don't think he knows he built.. and I constantly have to remind myself that the wall was already there when we met and has nothing to do with me. He makes no effort to break it down, because as I said I don't feel he is even aware of it. A big part of me feels like I'm supposed to help him with that, but I don't know how to.

I can definitely buy the created our own bad luck thing. We have often joked that there is an "us clause" on every situation in our lives...lol things that always work for other people never work for us. We can have a plan that seems fool proof, but SOMETHING will get in the way and it will come crashing down for us. He is very pessimistic too because life has taught him to be. He never expects anything to go right. I feel kinda weird talking about him like this.. I normally don't share any personal details of our marriage because it feels like I am disrespecting him. So, I do want to add that I'm not trying to bash him or point out his flaws. I embrace his flaws just as I do my own. I love him for every piece of what he is and would never give him up. I just want to make sure I'm not giving the impression of it being any other way.

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Karen2, I would like to ask you a question about spirits if you don't mind.. do they ever visit you in your dreams instead of in reality? I ask because I truly believe that I have had this happen to me on several occasions, and perhaps even more times than I realize. I have been visited by my late aunt (who was like my mother) many, many times. In the dreams I knew she was dead and I knew she was visiting me. In fact, she told me in the first one as I was crying not to worry about her because she would "be back to see me". This was a couple of days after she passed 10 years ago and I have met with her in my dreams countless times since then. I'm not scared when this happens, I think because I feel comfortable knowing it's "only" a dream. It makes me SO happy when I get to see her and I've noticed that she comes in times when I need it most. My dad (who passed when I was a kid) also visited me once. It was a very short dream and the only words he said to me were, "I can't stay. I just had something I had to do and wanted to make sure I got to see you while I was here." Then the phone rang and woke me up. It was a family member calling to say my aunt (his sister) had just passed a few minutes ago. I whole heartedly believe he came to take her home. These are the only times I really felt like I was being visited, but I have also had countless dreams where people I don't know are there. In my dream I know them, if that makes sense, but I wake up trying to figure out who the hell they were with a sense that I should know, but I never do. I know that something exists in my dreams that is not typical. I have always known this. I can even remember a dream that I had at 3 years old that is still VERY vivid in my mind. I have never been able to decipher its meaning, but I know it has one. If I am going to be visited by spirits, can I keep them in my dreams? Maybe that's ridiculous.. I don't know. But I know that I could explore it much easier without fear if I could limit it to that instead of my waking life.

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Cheshire-cat thank you for the advice! I don't take any medications, prescriptions or otherwise, except for occasionally for migraines. I don't get them often anymore, but lack of sleep does give them to me sometimes. I have wondered if I should get antidepressants, but I'm not a fan and would only do it as a last resort. I've only taken them once in my life but felt that it only hid a problem that didn't actually go away.. and I want more than that. I'm glad to know that you have also experienced the tingling and voices. Hearing that others have experienced it reassures me and lessens my fear that it's a medical problem.

Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts

Quarters are good....lol....

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Indeed Karen! I love quarters and I'm pretty good at throwing them in myself....lol

Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts

Spirit work in their own way....and In  their own time....the dream world is the connection to the spirit world....for me myself it's the same thing....and it spills over in this life.....I know the spirit world is all around and only a few inches away in all directions....the spirit you sense awake are no different to ones you sense while sleeping...we just can't see them with out eyes. ..and not all of those ones are bad...you Dad seems like a wonderful guy and loves you very much...he's with you while your awake as well....and so are the rest of your family who have passed on...they never really leave...and will protect you the best they can...that's what they do... the one who is speaking to you is also a spirit and one of your guides...it's ok to be afraid...but don't let it shut you down or shut them out because of your fear....


updated by @womanwhowalks: 09/22/16 04:05:10PM
Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Thank you Karen! I will keep that in mind. I have to step away for awhile to do some things.. but all of you please fire away with anything you think could help. I will be back on asap and will reply to everyone when I am. Thank you all so much! You have really helped me more than you know.

Jenstone
@jenstone
last year
72 posts

Thanks for the info on acetaminophen Cheshire Cat. I've had a head cold/flu and taken round the clock medicine for about three days, and I notice a blunting of my senses. Also could just be I'm dog-sick and tired, but still, I'm going to go all the way off the cold meds with tylenol and switch to ibuprofin just to test this theory on myself. Karen2, HopDaddy Cheshire Cat, Cat Whisperer, Rene, goodenergyhealing-- you are all such kind and helpful empathic people and it has been fun today to feel your spirits resonating with authenticity... there is such a lack of "ego" in this place, lots of competence but not ego-based. Very refreshing. 

Goodenergyhealing
@goodenergyhealing
last year
373 posts

CheshireCat - interesting tips re sleep meds. I had a post on my FB newsfeed the other day re spray-able Melatonin, which supposedly is better for ones liver (but that might just be advertising lies?)

I think the increased mortality (re isolation) only really applies if one feels lonely being isolated though. I often feel better though in solitude, than around many folk. As likely do many empath. Plus most of us feel connected otherwise (we feel the ONEness), and we often have strong spiritual connections (and know we are never really alone.). On top of all that being spiritual many will have decreased fear of death anyway ;)

Love and Light

Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts

That's exactly right Goodenergyhealing. ....exactly right....I don't fear death well..as much as before as I know where i'm going and who i'm gonna be with...lol....and I prefer to be solitary...especially with the job I have ...I'm so drained after work...that I need to be away from ppl... the melatonin does work but i found it doesn't give you the deep deep sleep you sometimes need...the healing sleep...when you can get a few 8 hour deep deep sleeps in it really makes a difference ...

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

I'm gonna try to keep this as short as possible because it's just about 10:30 here and I feel like I might really be able to sleep tonight. I just wanted to thank you all again for all of the advice you have given me. Every single one of you have helped me. I can honestly say that I am in a much better place emotionally right now than I was less than 24 hours ago when I made this post. Since my last post, I've been doing a lot of thinking. A lot of positive things have happened. It's strange but it's almost as if a feeling of acceptance has washed over me. It's hard to explain.. but this morning my body just felt so heavy. My mind was foggy and I had a general feeling of anxiety that wouldn't go away. But now I feel like a huge weight has been lifted, my mind is clearer than it has been in a week, and even though there's still anxiety I'm much more calm and collected. Oh, and I haven't felt my crown tingle in hours! I wonder what that means?

So, anyway, this all makes me feel like I'm on the right path. And since my feelings run me, I'm gonna be sticking around. I've come up with a game plan to explore all of this based on the advice you've all given me. My fears are slowly fading and being replaced with a desire to know where this leads. I hope it is okay if I keep updating this post and maybe asking new questions along the way. I might need you guys!! But for now... I sleep.

Hop Daddy
@hop-daddy
last year
502 posts

@ash2016, its good to hear you are doing better. You went from a pretty frantic intro message to acceptance and calming. You are not going crazy and accepting that you are an empath and learning how you tick will make you feel in better control of your feelings and your life again. By the way, your choice of words is very telling. When you feel heavy you are loaded with negative and running on empty and need rest and grounding. When you rest up and ground out the negative from your body and mind, you will actually feel relaxed, energetic, and light. And that's the daily balancing act.

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

I finally got some sleep. I wasn't able to fall asleep until 2am, but got 4 hours then up for an hour before getting 4 more. Hubby was off today and that allowed me to start my weekend catch up a bit early. It was good sleep and I don't remember dreaming at all. I woke up feeling much better, but today has been.. kinda strange. I'd really like to hear some opinions on a few things. I'm not familiar with how these threads work yet. Will you guys get a notification when I post here? Or would it be better to make a new thread for my new questions? 

Bookworm
@bookworm
last year
85 posts

Hi Ash,

I think anyone who has commented recieves 1 notification when the thread is updated, but then they don't get any more notifications after that until they visit the thread again (I think that is how it works,  Elise had to move the forum recently so we're still finding our way around - we'll I am! )

It would probably be best to start a new thread with your new questions,  so that other people who might be able to help with a particular issue/question can easily find the new thread and respond. Everyone here is always so willing to help,  you will get responses. Happy

Welcome to the EC xx

Ash2016
@ash2016
last year
34 posts

Thank you bookworm! I will make a new thread later then. :)

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