Dating

TigerLily
TigerLily
@tigerlily
2 years ago
456 posts
I really don't see too much on dating. But I'm struggling here and need help.I've been actively dating to find a partner, and it's really hard on me because after one date I guess you can say "you just know" lol. It's online dating I'm mostly doing. I think we as empaths can just pick up on that right away. My friends don't understand this and think I'm being picky. But the "vibes" I get are all over. Insecurities, desperation, not interested, depression, negativity etc these are all things I feel right away on the first date from the guy. And some I get such a bad feeling before I even meet them, and then I know why. (Even though texting and online profiles seem fine)But, I feel like when I meet one who has great positive energy and he shows interest as well and I think it's going somewhere. All of a sudden I feel like I get this feeling out of nowhere they are not interested. It really bothers me because, not only does it happen often, but I get upset. It's like his excitement combined with mine excitement, I'm just way overly excited that it probably scares them off. I have no idea how to control this. I almost feel like a different person.(I'm currently going through this now, met a great guy, good vibes, have butterflies. And guess he's had "long" days the past 2 days, but is at least reaching out just to say hi) I'm trying not come off as desperate, but this double excitement is hard to tame, along with this not interested feeling. I don't know how to go with the flow with someone who has good positive energy?
updated by @tigerlily: 10/13/18 07:32:26AM
Rene''
Rene''
@rene
2 years ago
1,195 posts
That is a tough one. Sometimes it's hard to tell if it's your emotions your feeling or theirs. Especially when your dealing with those butterflies. When I'm in doubt I trust my intuition. That first feeling I get is usually the correct one. I have never been on a dating sight but I have known people that has. It seems scary to me. So please be careful.
Goodenergyhealing
Goodenergyhealing
@goodenergyhealing
2 years ago
392 posts

the feeling of 'not interested' could be their fear that you might not be interested too. Or with my last BF, who turned out to be a full blown Narcissist, I sometimes had such feelings, even though in the outside all seemed to be fine. With the benefit of hindsight I now think it was when he started to have feelings of boredom.... Not meaning to make you paranoid though, but sometimes I find that feeling something does not guarantee that I can understand everything. There is at times more than one way to interpret a feeling. If it happens, I have to decide if I want to communicate verbally, or watch for more signs either way....

Generally I get rid of any negative emotions I feel asap. That includes feelings of insecurity, fear, anxiety, etc, connected with meeting potential partners too. You can use tools like EFT for that, or just pray that they be removed (and then it often feels as if I breath them off).

All the best with your dating - much Happiness!

TigerLily
TigerLily
@tigerlily
2 years ago
456 posts

Thought I'd give an update on this one. This great gent is going through alot right now and is highly stressed. Some situations at hand in his life took a turn for the worse, and he is trying to work through them. Maybe that's where I'm getting the lack of interest from him. He still communicates every so often, but doesn't ask for help or show signs he needs it. To me, being used to everyone needing my help to get through a tough time is a shock to me. My closest friend even said this is probably a blessing and the kind of man I need in my life.

I am my worse critic sometimes as that logic part kicks in and gives me bad feelings, but when I listen to my heart it's all good. I will have to use my heart more often for myself as my brain just gets in the way because of my experiences in life. Hope this makes sense.

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