Hey everybody, I hope you're having a wonderful day!
I need a bit of advice right now - bear with me this is gonna take a bit of explanation. It was a several years ago that I found out I was an Empath (and found this place), and following that I made strides in grounding and feeling more like 'myself' for the first time in my life. Understanding some of what it going on inside me really helped me in many ways even though i still don't know or understand everything about myself.
About 3 years ago I started to realize that I wasn't feeling well, and in retrospect the hard things I had to go through in the years before I even knew about Empaths really had taken its toll on me, and I was slowly unraveling, or so it felt. I've always had problems with anxiety and depression - I just didn't know that's what it was. But that's a whole other story in itself. Anyway, I wasn't living a meaningful life, and the job I had was basically obliterating my will to live and draining me on every level. I had no energy at all, and I started to get really bad anxiety attacks and depression periods. I soldiered on far too long before getting help. It's funny how that works - you don't realize how bad it is until you literally can't move. But I did get help and I had to quit my job to even start healing at all. That place was way too wrong for me.
It's been about 3 years now, and it's been a slow road, but I finally took the decision to stop taking my medication - mostly because I felt they weren't making anything any better anymore, instead they were holding me back from healing more. It was quite scary but at the same time I've held off for quite some time, and I know it's the right decision.
Now for your advice - it's been about 2 weeks now, and the withdrawal symptoms are going away and I'm starting to feel better. The problem is, it seems these past years of numbing myself - which I know was necessary - has made me take steps back in my empathy skills and I'm suddenly flooded and overwhelmed by the surroundings. It's not as bad as it was before I knew I was an empath, it feels different, and I still have the basics down, but it feels like resolving all the things that needed resolved through my illness have made me more aware and also vulnerable aswell as stronger, if that makes sense.
I wonder if any of you guys have any insight in how I should handle it and how I should know what path to take - it definitely feels like I could get further than I have before. I've learned ALOT about myself these past years and I've come to accept and love myself on a new level. At the same time I'm so frustrated because it's like I suddenly have no clue what I'm supposed to do with my life. I'm sure that's nothing unique, even though we all are.
I hope I'm making sense
updated by @nea: 09/04/18 07:13:26AM