What do sociopaths feel like to you?

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water_lily
@water-lily
last year
90 posts

Hey everyone!

I have a friend with whom I don't feel any emotional connection. If she is telling me a sad story, I will still feel sad, but I don't get any emotional "vibes" until that point. This is strange for me because I feel at least a little something from almost everyone I meet, and usually, this grows upon getting to know someone better. I know that, in the past, she has manipulated me and I've seen her manipulate other people, but you don't need to be a sociopath to manipulate people. This led me to wonder if someone being a dead spot in my empathic network could be a warning sign of sociopathic tendency (sociopathic radar? sociodar? socar with a soft c sound?).There is also a possibility that because I know her to be manipulative, I am somehow subconsciously shutting her out. What are your experiences? What do sociopaths feel like to you?


updated by @water-lily: 09/18/17 01:22:34PM
Rene''
@rene
last year
1,194 posts
When I come across a sociopath. I feel like my bubble is being pushed on. Trying to find a weak place in it so they can force their way in. It's easy for me to deal with sociopaths and narcissist if they are not close to me. But i have had to tolerate them due to them being family members but not any more. I think your energy and or vibrations filters her out which is good if this is someone you don't feel you can walk away from. That's why I keep my circle small. You have to set boundaries and refuse not to let them cross no matter how much you feel sorry for them. I have a very close friend that is not a sociopath but has a very, very strong character and mind and speaks very bluntly but loves with her whole heart. She's not a sociopath but everyone around her is so I'm her escape which is fine as long as I not a punching bag. I'm no ones punching bag and I will bit back when backed into a corner and she knows this. So just set strong boundaries if this person is important to you or cut them cords and let her go. Don't let it drain your energy.
Nikki3
@nikler
last year
116 posts
They feel like an empty parade to me. Like something big and bright is coming but contains nothing. Hard to describe. I've had enough dealings with them that I can see them coming and avoid engaging with them. Just don't have the time or patience any more.
water_lily
@water-lily
last year
90 posts

Thanks Hoofbeats,

I think that there can be very self-centered empaths. I think some people get tired of other people taking advantage and sort of snap. Maybe that is the type of thing that happened to those people? Thanks so much for your insight!

water_lily
@water-lily
last year
90 posts

Thanks for your input :) I'm sorry to hear that you've dealt with so many of them.

water_lily
@water-lily
last year
90 posts

When I first met this friend, I definitely had a pushing on a bubble feeling when she was trying to figure me out. Luckily, I think she has stopped trying to manipulate me (for the most part) and that may explain the void. I'm trying to phase her out now though so I think it'll be alright :) Thanks for your input Rene'!

Nyla
@nyla
last year
22 posts

It sounds to me that you are subconsciously shielding yourself when you are around your friend so that you don't feel her "stuff." You know that she is manipulative, which is not good, so you are protecting yourself by shielding.

My mother was/is a sociopath. My empath abilities began with her when I was a child just to stay alive. I have met others as well. The feeling I get as an empath when being around one is of hyper-vigilance. It is very exhausting.

Visitor
@visitor
last year
303 posts

I hesitate to use the word "sociopath" because it's so overused and dangerous. But I can tell if someone is toxic to me by the way they use their eyes. Within 5 minutes of meeting someone, if they don't focus on me at all, or look to the side or upward or anywhere else but me, I take that as a bad sign. Also, if they talk over me, interrupt me, and don't seem a bit interested in me or my opinion, I take it as a warning sign. I don't know if those people are "sociopathic" or merely immature, but I don't seek out their company.

seanw4202
@seanw4202
last year
54 posts

Agree with Nikki and Justin, I feel nothing, no drive to even introduce myself as they feel empty, or not real? Background people I call them... They just kinda fill in the gaps, like there are to many people and not enough love, if love were a measurable entity that is... I blame social engineering

I pledge allegiance to the flag -VS- I pledge allegiance to all mankind, in all the universe & thereof beyond, and to the goodwill of others for which I desire, all species under all gods, with freedom and abundance for all.

KM
@km
last year
90 posts

They are initially very charming and unless they slip up, you may not notice a hook approaching. You may actually think that "things are too good to be true". Then as time progresses, you realize that this person, compared to others expect more from you.

You are lucky if they are just a passing acquaintance and you can shift out of their way. Otherwise you are in for some drama.

I have enough of this in my life without focusing on it further, so...good luck friends picking these out of a crowd and not fall victim.

I was just thinking (the other day) that being an empath predisposes you to some of this. The people with the psychological problem (or manipulative tendencies with clear wrong intention) use what they see as a weakness in you. Believe it or not, empaths fall victim all the time because they are so cautious about hurting other people's feelings. The manipulators will play their game, so as to make you think that you would be hurting their feelings if you "did not respond" "did not act" or "do whatever they set up for you to do.

The way to spot them is to ask: IS THE REQEST REASONABLE or is is Excessive. Is complying to their request imposing on you.

You will FEEL the strain before you will pick it up with even the most logical mind.

Listen to your heart and stay clear of these folks.

Good luck.

water_lily
@water-lily
last year
90 posts

I don't think that is the case for her. When I interact empathically with people (e.g. someone is sad, but trying to hide it so I do something to cheer him/her up) she is very curious about the interaction and tries to ask questions about how I can figure this stuff out; she even acts a little jealous I think if she was ever empathic, she would have already known how I know that sort of thing.

water_lily
@water-lily
last year
90 posts

Thanks dproper for the definitions. Either way, I think I will try to distance myself without making it obvious I am doing so.

water_lily
@water-lily
last year
90 posts

Quite possibly. Thanks for the insight Nyla.

water_lily
@water-lily
last year
90 posts

I'm glad to know I am not alone.

water_lily
@water-lily
last year
90 posts

Thanks visitor for the input. However, I don't think eye contact is the best way to judge people. There are cultures that tend to avoid eye contact especially in cases they are trying to be polite. Also, I tend to not like to look people in their eyes because it makes their emotional connection stronger for me and that can be overwhelming. I do try to look at the face though so as to not make people too uncomfortable. I definitely agree about the person paying attention and being polite though.

water_lily
@water-lily
last year
90 posts

Thanks for your input Seanw4202 :)

water_lily
@water-lily
last year
90 posts

Thanks KM. This helps :)

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