How do you see yourself?

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DemiPanda
@demipanda
last year
69 posts
What do you see yourself as? I am a very energetic and present person. At times, or uhm most of the time, I can be a little too much for the average person to handle. I have a very happy and kind attitude. I am very woop-boop-boop!! I just can't think of a word to describe me really...I guess I'm strange, but aren't we all. I'm very awkward when angry, I don't do angry well, when you see it you just know it doesn't fit my character. I don't like it and quite frankly it confuses me. I cannot take people yelling at me, makes me cry, sometimes, most of the time these days I get awkward angry. I'm very determined and decisive, and every bit a self proclaimed warrior of not war. Doesn't make sense, I know, but oh well!! Oh! Oh! Another interesting thing about me! I have this STRANGE urge to bite things and scratch things sometimes. But that's probably from the critters...or I could just be weird LOL I'm playful but not carefree. I can become VERY serious very fast. I'm a very thoughtful person. I like to know things, I think things through deeply and come to multiple conclusions so I supose I am a philosopher of sorts! The female Thinker! Hehe! Often when people first meet me they don't understand me because I'm very kind and approach people in a rather...bubbly way? Happy! And people often later in a relationship say when they first met me they thought I was crazy! LOL I think the Mad Hatter fashion is the best fashion and if it weren't for restrictions I'd probably dye my hair the color of candy and wear a hatter's hat myself. Or atleast for a while because I become bored of looks fast. But I'll never tire of WONDERLAND! Looking glass...they exist, ya know! ^_- hmmm Empath wise I can be rather self-destructive..XD But I do adore hearing others speak and getting to know them better! I like to help those closest to my heart and am more than willing to put myself in harms way when dealing with unsavory and harmful people. I tend to have an opposite me, opposite personality? I suppose that deals in those people, rather violent bugger she is right there yes, but it's a good side if ye happen to get in any trouble, eh? Hmmm I'm a universal empath but you can get that bit from my account, yeah? I have a best friend with gray hair and grey green eyes that's followed me around since I was a wee child. Lots of entities that hang around me just to watch me. My shadow's quite nice as well, though sometimes I get jealous cause she's prettier than me. If I were saying this to any others I'm sure they'd think me loco. But aren't the bestest people what the "normals" call crazy?? Haha! So yes that's how I see myself! How do you see you?[EDIT]No one seems to like that question very much hehe..I didn't realize at the time how personal the question sounds. I just mean like...your personality, hobbies, interests, favorite things, ect. Things like that! That's way less personal than asking how do you see yourself lol
updated by @demipanda: 09/18/17 01:22:16PM
Bigg Hoss
@bigg-hoss
last year
36 posts

Well I have no problem answering as it is the only way to heal and move on from toxic self image by acknowledging it accepting it vocalizing it and moving on. I have had terrible issues in my life with self image and inner issues as well with emotions and such as many of us do. I still fight the battle of convincing me that me is beautiful and worth something to someone some where on a companionship level. I have had serious issues with intimacy at times in life because of it (battling being overweight my whole life). I am finally at an age where I am just beginning to accept and forgive myself (been a long time coming). Also I get a great deal of enjoyment helping others but at times it seems so taxing especially when EVERYONE flocks to you even when you dont want it for advice, love, healing etc... Now that part is over with lol. The other part of this question... Hmmmm .... Well I guess in short see myself as a mix of a little bit of everything. I love a good party though drinking is getting to be a bit much for me (the recovery is quite painful these days and the feeling it gives me is horrific on an internal and spiritual level). I totally am into music but am tired of all this cookie cutter garbage that's mass produced by the brain wash/rot mass media with all the symbolism. I am what you would call a mix of Goth, Redneck, Urban LOL I love Country, Rockabilly, Psychobilly, Punk, some Metal, Industrial, Darkwave, Synthy techno, some Rap and R&B stuff sometimes.... I EXTREMELY love Motorcycles, Hot Rods/Rat Rods and the outdoors stuff like fishing and hunting (though in last few years I have gotten way out of control on my weight due to a slump and don't get out much now). I am a serious extrovert and tend to be in the middle of everything whether for good or bad it seems sometimes as I have a great love for people and social interactions (when I am not having a bad spot in life). I am also a big fan of tattoos and such (I have over 50 of them). When I am not reading about things in the news from various places around the world or studying researching things that fascinate me (paranormal, supernatural, psychic phenomena) I am gaming to my hearts content to try and detach from all this nastiness going on in the world at times. I have done and love all types of gaming. L.A.R.P. , CCG, Table Top, PC, Console you name it.... I have gamed it probably LOL Also, I am a dog lover....total dog freak LOL Though my attitudes towards many things in and among those loves and hobbies is changing the more I "wake up" to the world around me and the reality of the "illusion" we are force fed to accept and "like" or "believe". So, as time goes on I find my self rapidly changing in some aspects but completely keeping my idea and loves for other hobbies and habits. As I approach my mid 30's I am aware this is one of many transitional times in my life so I expect much more adventure awaits lol. Well.... thats me in a nutshell I guess LOL ... A very big nutshell ... I am sure there is more I am just not thinking of it right now

DemiPanda
@demipanda
last year
69 posts
I've recently decided that I've become bored of focusing on the past so much and being such a pessimist about my future LOL So I'm coming out of a long hard depression. I'm very peculiar about myself. I have ideals that I wish I could be, but as a young girl and pretty much a young person in general that's all people do is ridicule you about this or that, how you should look because you're becoming a women, what you should do to be beautiful, what you should aim for to fit societies majority view of beauty to the point where it's now super hard for me to have any confidence in my looks at all cause you've brainwashed me to think I'm not good enough. I had a mental breakdown because my family HATES my natural hair so much and constantly constantly is on about it so much that I cut a huge chunk of it out and then cried because despite their hatred I loved my hair. Honestly people really shouldn't do that to young people because where do you think all these starving and ever so increasing suicide stuff is coming from. Never being enough. In truth I could honestly care less what they think...but of course that's when I'm alone and my energy and blur free and NOT impacted by their overwhelmingly negative energies. Lol Unfortunately there's no job in the world that applies to what I want to do in my life because I have such a broad-spectrum mind it's impossible for me to settle with only ONE thing. But I only have so much money, couldn't possibly afford all it will take to be EVERYTHING XD I also am into gaming for practically the same reasons. Plus it's just so FUN and ADDICTIVE. I also enjoy Marvel and DC collectibles, particularily mostly only Crossbones, Harley Quinn, Joker, and Teen Titans (the original not whatever the heck that new thing is) XD um...there's alot to me...so I'll probably be commenting back and forth when I can pinpoint these things lol But for now yeah that's it :P
Bigg Hoss
@bigg-hoss
last year
36 posts

OMG.... I am a total comic dork no shame here LOL I played DC Universe Online from 2011 till last December. I dont know why but i just enjoy the epicness and good escape of a good comic book. Although, I also love some manga, anime and graphic novels.... I am a big reader :D

DemiPanda
@demipanda
last year
69 posts
OMG same here! I am a big reader as well! I love manga and anime and comics as well! I actually create my own characters and write manga as well. I have friends who make video games and I design characters for them! That's awesome!
Rene''
@rene
last year
1,194 posts
Hmmm....and I thought I was a easy reader but I can't explain who I am.I am a dreamer. I am the one who loves standing in the rain. I am the one who people looks for when the need to be cheered up. I love to laugh. My mouth is blunt honesty and that does hurt people's feelings but I never mean for it to. It's all out of love so if you want something sugar coated, don't as me to do it. I'm a free spirit. I have No Tolerance what so ever for fake people. I only allow people to know parts of me. I don't think any living soul knows all of me and yes, I do have trust issues because I feel strangers intentions and most of the time they are bad. I have studied many religions and traditions and still don't know where I fit in. I'm a Sagittarius with strong Sagittarius traits. I am a fire sign so, yes, I can be standoffish if it's for the right reasons. I do have a temper and sometimes it shows when I think someone isn't being treated fair . People loves my energy and my laugh because it's loud but I would rather be by myself , walking in the woods with my dog. I don't like judgmental people but I must be one also because I'm judging them judging. I think every person has a story and I love hearing the stories. I don't like for people to be grouped or considering themselves in a group because groups causes separation and we are all here for a reason and it's not to confine our thoughts to being identical to anyone's elses. I am very right brain ordinated. I dont think a horse should be lead to water, when he gets thirsty, he will find it. I was not a strict enough mother to my sons and it's because I was raised by narcissist. I love foggy mornings and thunderstorms and walking in mud barefooted. Lol. I would love to sleep for 8 hrs stright, if I only could. . It seems people have tried to restrain me from being who I am, all my life. Maybe they think they are or was protecting me , but they are holding me back and holding me down and now, since I'm older, I have so may responabalities that I will never be free. Free to be me... I love all animals but dogs are my heart
DemiPanda
@demipanda
last year
69 posts
I have ALOT in common with you. Except I haven't found what animal takes the closest place in my heart.

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