I just joined EC and am super excited to be part of a community where I may actually feel like I belong for the very first time in my 28 years of life. I always felt different growing up and would tell other kids that i was an alien who was accidentally left behind on this planet but would be rescued one day from my people (silly, i know). For a while I thought it may have been me dealing with my sexuality but after i sort that out, I realized that there were other things going on. I was always very observant and could easily read people around me without having to speak to them. I could feel what they were feeling and I felt like i knew people without ever saying a word to them. Strangers always come up to me to vent regardless of where I am. It can be draining but I sometimes feel like they encounter me to just let it all out. I feel like im okay with that if it's helping them but I'm not sure if it's always healthy for myself?
It was always hard for me to focus and I was diagnosed with inattentive adhd in college ( i no longer believe i have adhd or take meds, im sure its more of a spiritual thing). A few months ago I was randomly contacted by an ex who I hadn't spoken to in a long time. He was upset about a break up and told me he went to a psychic who read him and told him that he may be an empath. I looked up the word and it resonated with me so deeply and I felt like things started to make a lot more sense. There were times where I would randomly feel so depressed and just wanted to cry and I had no idea why. It was usually after leaving the gym. Public places with crowds can be difficult for me. No matter what the season is, I sometimes start to sweat profusely when I am surrounded by other people. The anxiety kicks in and i get VERY hot. Sometimes just talking to one person and them being so close to me makes me warm.
Since i was a teenager, I've always had certain dreams that would come true . Pregnancies, co workers getting fired, death, etc. I also have dreams where things happen to certain people but never happen in real life which confuses me because i don't always understand why i am being shown certain things. How is one able to distinguish from a possible event that may occur as opposed to it just being another dream? Do you guys warn a person about certain things if you dream it or just let it all play out?
Anyway, I was searching the forum in regards to alcohol and drugs and how empaths can react to different substances but felt like creating a new topic since I'm new and had other questions. Last night, I was with a friend who has been going through a lot and is currently dealing with depression and anxiety. It is sometimes difficult to be around someone who is always so down but I love him and feel like i met him to help him somehow ( i feel this with almost everyone i meet). We were drinking last night (way too much) and I thought the night was going well until we fell asleep and I woke up feeling very heavy and sad.He showed no signs of being upset during the day but I started crying uncontrollably and I knew that what i was feeling was my friend and not myself . Because I was drunk and crying, my friend did not want to admit this to me at the time but today he told me that all day yesterday he had been thinking about suicide again. It all made sense. I guess my question is if other empaths here have similar experiences where alcohol may heighten their abilities and they just pick up on things stronger than usual? I don't drink often but I have never felt someone else's feelings as intensely as i did last night..
I also wanted to touch on other experiences I've encountered that made me realize I am capable of more than I ever imagined.I tried a marijuana for the first time earlier this year. It was an edible and I probably ate more than I should've . I could feel that someone or something was with me , inside me and using my body to communicate. I was conscious and aware of everything that was going on but i knew i wasn't alone in my body. Something kept pulling me to call my friend( the one i mentioned above who is depressed) who's mother passed away a few years ago of ALS. During the high, my limbs would randomly give out. I kept falling to the ground while talking to my friend. At some points I couldn't even move. The way i spoke changed and so did the way i walked when I could get up. I was using way more hips than I ever do in real life, very sassy lol. As i was talking to my friend I did a lot of apologizing and crying but i also had happier moments with him where we laughed and I was basically asking him how he is doing and that he needs to take care of himself. I can't help but feel like I was channeling my friends mother that night along with other energies i felt come and go.
I've tried the edible a few more times with other friends and something comes through each time. I end up telling them things they never told me but I am sometimes afraid because i don't know if what is coming through is good or bad. I had a friend who was experiencing terrible headaches. I placed my hands on his head and saged him one night and they were gone after a while. Another friend of mine was having shoulder pain and kept putting off seeing his doctor for months. I placed my hands on his shoulder when I was high and i swear i could feel his flesh moving inside him. I saged him as well. That night his pain got 10 times worse and he finally went to the doctor the next morning and ended up having surgery the same week.He is better now. I am curious to know if anyone has discovered their gifts while using a substance? Does anyone here only demonstrate certain gifts while on a substance? How can I know if what comes through to me during these highs are good or bad? Deep down I don't feel like it's negative but i am fairly new to all of this and it is very overwhelming. I also DO NOT want to have to rely on any substance to be able to use my gifts. I know I want to do good and help others as much as i can. I've always felt like that is my mission in this lifetime and wan't to carry it out. Please let me know if parts of my post would be better off in another group. Thank you all for reading this very long post.
updated by @aiden: 09/02/18 03:32:09AM