Im in overdrive, and I cant stop it. Any advice?

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who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts

I remember the first time I "read" a person as an empath. I was probably 5 or 6. At the time, I didnt know what was happening to me. Looking back it set off a chain of events that would lead me to where I am now.

When I was 10 years old I moved here to the US. Feeling all the pain and frustration of my parents and everyone else around me, I wanted to do anything in my power to make their life just a bit easier. Little did I know that later it would break me. For over a decade, I gave my closest people a piece of me each day. I put myself out their for them forgetting completely about myself. All I wanted was to help them. And when I felt overwhelmed I would tell myself that one day it will all change and I will finally live my own life. 12 years later and I am still here. The only difference is that I cannot no longer help the ones in need, because I am so broken myself. I didnt know what I was doing. I didnt know I was an empath until recently.

But I feel like I found out too late. I feel like I am completely open to everything and everyone. Like a antenna that picks up every single channel. And I dont know how to turn it off. I dont have enough energy to do anything about it. And all those people that I tried to help? dont understand me. I feel so alone all the time.

I feel so broken. It broke me completely and the worst part is that I cant put myself together here. I need to go away, to be alone and finally find myself. But I cant go away. Im stuck here. Its getting so bad that Im starting to feel the pain physically. But I cant find any energy to do anything about it. I dont know how to turn it off. Its like my nervous system is in over drive and the lever to turn it down or off is broken.

Anyone have any advice?


updated by @who-am-i: 01/10/17 01:02:02AM
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts
Hi...one of the things you need to remember is your not alone....not anymore...there is a lot of info here...just take the time to read through it...everything your experiencing can be repaired...take the time for yourself...as darkestshadeofblue mentioned...you'll probably need to withdraw from everyone for a time...I had to do it and still do it when I need to...and there's no guilt even though people don't understand...that doesn't matter...what matters is that YOU understand...and are willing to learn a how to protect yourself and heal...one step at a time...that's all it is...
Reckless
@reckless
last year
117 posts
Sounds very similar to the path I walked, and still walking to complete. For years I've helped my family and I'm not the oldest or a parent yet I found myself going out of my way each time. What I also noticed were others took advatange of this.I had to claim myself again. Make it known you will refuse to help unless everything is in supreme condition for you, since that will be your happy point.You need to get away. Money is always the next issue but once you distance yourself from others you will find that you have more than you realize.Rebalance your life. You need time to yourself not just to wind down but to recollect your energy through thoughts. How? You should be able to generate your own new energy infinitely. It will stop once your mind is clouded by anything to make you blind.The most dangerous people are the ones you love. Only they have the power to truly stop you, since they are always a part of you.I can say after it all, I am all alone. I can say I have been more happy now than I ever have been in life. I may have come across as heartless but this was after I closely monitored every relationship around me. I was fed up with regret and always being used to clear others' energies with them not doing a thing for me.I know I sound like a selfish person but this was the only thing I could think to do.
who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts
A big thank you to all that replied! It means a lot to me and helps to read others stories.
who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts
Reckless,I have always felt like if I did get away I would be happier. That I would find myself again and no matter what I would be able to deal with things. If you dont mind me asking, how did you get away? How long did it take you?You said " you should be able to regenerate your own new energy infinitely....."That's one of my biggest problems. I can't. I hear all these "voices" in my head. It's like you said they blind you. Whenever I look out all I see is darkness all around me.
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts
What exactly do you mean...when you look out all you see is darkness all around you?...is that you...or is that what one of the voices is saying?...cause realistically when I look out I see my livingroom...for me the voices is one of my abilities...Clairaudient. ...I hear and talk to spirit...a lot of people have that ability...and don't even know what it is...we're taught to ignore it and to be afraid of it...so...slow down and try not to panic...as you learn the pieces will all fall into place...and any fear you have will melt away. And never say you can't...take that out of your vocabulary...because...you can...
who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts
Karen,For me looking out is not looking out to the world, but more like looking inside me around. And the voices aren't exactly voices. It's very hard to explain and I don't think it's clayoraudiente.Thank you for your reply. And you are right I need to take the word cant put of my vocabulary.
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts
OK. ..so...what are these voices saying?...and yes...if your hearing voices then a gifts may be opening up...and it's best to explore it and be prepared for that possibility...rather than deny it and not face it...
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts
When my own gift opened up I went on a full exploration of every aspect. ..if I'm to have this gift I need to know EVERYTHING...it was nuts...but it was necessary so I would be prepared for anything coming at me in the energy world that I couldn't see...and be as sure as possible so I could take steps to protect myself and understand all that I was sensing...the more I learned the better I was because the fear started to go...which was my intent..lol...the more you know..the less fear you'll have when the unexpected pop up..I still get freaked out on occassion but i'm prepared so the fear isn't really fear...just surprise....and your surrounded by light...your aura shines very brightly...
who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts
Karen,I'm not sure if they are exactly voices. More like a buzzing in my head. Like there is a whole different world going on in my head. I can't make out exactly voices or words. I just don't know how to explain it any other way. Sometimes I think it might all the emotional energy I'm picking up and I can " hear" everyone that I'm picking up. And other times I feel like it's the place where all the souls are that I'm " hearing". Like heaven. All I know for sure is that its exhausting. My brain never rests. It's all filled with this "stuff" and I barely have any room for anything else. Even when I sleep my brain doesn't fully rest. Only once every few weeks to a few months that I will get a goods night sleep and wake up refreshed in the morning but by noon I'm exhausted again. I don't know if it's clayoraudiece.. I've always felt like clairoaudience was hearing voices from one person or atleast the voices being like voices and not this buzzing... But maybe you are right, maybe it's a gift opening up. I will try to keep an open mind. Thank you.
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts
My own gift I hear a lot of people...lots of spirit...sometimes I hear what's in people's aura...I hear all types of energy. .from crystal to plants...pets...etc...there's no limit to what I can hear...and it's difficult for me at time to pinpoint where or who it's coming from at times while away from my house...it could be a spirit....it could be a thought...on night that I dream I actually feel the energy enter my system...and usually that night I dream...sound is energy...you cough you send energy out as a wave...lol...I get the buzzing in my ears too..even now...you can't block the gift from opening...at this point you can only help it open it in a controlled way...which is lucky for you..when mine opened it was a big boom...the Chakra associated with Clairaudience is the throat chakra...and could probably use a clearing and balancing...another thing that helps me is a good sleeping pill...that's all I have...when my brain is over stimulated a good deep solid sleep works wonders....and...smudging....
who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts
What do you mean it was a boom?I take sleeping pills sometimes too if I really need it. I even sleep with headphones because my brain never stops thinking and keeps me awake and if I have s show playing that I've seen before I listen to what they say and fall asleep to their voices.
who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts
I'm the same way I need to know everything.. But I second guess myself all the time. I don't believe it, kind of like who amI to experience such a thing. Even when I found out I was an empath it took me months to really accept the fact that I am an empath. What do you mean my aura shines brightly?
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts
A boom means an explosion...a big one...
who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts
You just suddently started to hear voices out of nowhere?
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts
Your energy body...or soul...your full of light...your also surrounded by your spirit guides...who are there to help you at this moment...they wish to help...and really...they're waiting g for you to find them...there are a lot of good things about all this...there's also a lot of pain in the butt stuff...but I wouldn't want to go back to the way I was before...I really wasn't happy...
who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts
Are you saying that in general? Because I know that we all have spirit guides. Or are you actually talking about my spirit guides? I'm sorry that I have to ask it's just like I said before I'm always second guessing Khaled and I need to know things for sure to accept them..
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts
Like you I have a tuff time explaining what went on...my brain felt like it was on fire...there was a lot going on so i've had a hard time pinpointing the exact cause of all that went on...it was a very intense time for me and quite scary...so I understand your fear...it gets better though...my Clairaudience is real and hasn't gone away...and I'm ok with it...
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts
Your own guides...you do have them...are you sure you're the one second guessing? ...I know when I start second guessing it really isn't me now....it's really a program within my subconscious that needs to be removed...
who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts
Thank you for sharing your story with me and taking the time to reply to me. It really helped me be more open to myself, so thank you!!!
who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts
You can hear them?
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts
Yes..I can...someone is asking me to help you please..i've said i'll try....and also...yes...I can hear my subconscious. ..it's like a separate channel...kinda like a cassette tape...I know what goes into it....I cleared my subconscious out...I still have stuff to work on...but i know when something is not right and have to clear it right away...I now know what's left to do...it takes time to learn all this....this is a pretty big thing coming up for you...you CAN do this though...I keep hearing your spirit guides are waiting...so..they're waiting...
Karen2
@womanwhowalks
last year
783 posts

One thing I've tried and found it worked rather well...even if it was a bit awkward and I looked rather ridiculous. ..lol...was puting an electric heat pad on my head...set to the lowest setting...and just relaxed...lol...

Reckless
@reckless
last year
117 posts
Something tells me you know the answer to everything but you're looking for confirmation?

Make yourself less available even when you do have the time. I'm mostly available on weekends to the ones that hurt my energy. Too many days will definitely overload me.

Get away by moving. I understand this can be hard considering how the world is. But it is work for happiness, or live in misery.

You have telepathy between you and your loved ones, most likely. Chances are their thoughts cross your mind half the time. This is where they are able to enter your aura and hurt it.

Imagine creating a shield. When you care for someone, you give them a door, a key to you and they will always be able to do what they want with you. This has nothing to do with manipulation, it is just how you work and they know this.

Love will make you blind. You care so much that you can't imagine hurting them. You care so much it hurts. You care to a point where you may be live it is ridiculous.

If you have a hard time leaving then do a bit of both. Live in an unknown area but visit them to see it.

I'm not sure what your abilities are but they mostly seem similar to mine. The same mentality you use to judge strangers, place it upon the ones you love and you will see it yourself. I was always against such a thing because it is not right to judge ones you love. But when you realize they are hurting you, and you're not paying attention that will create a big problem really fast.

You are the light. Light is always meant to chase away the darkness. Even if your light has faded it will return, it always will. When it does keep it bright as possible by reminding yourself everyday what you know you must do. I cannot tell you what to do, you sort of know what to do in your life. Your guesses are usually correct. We are both alike in doubting ourselves greatly. It is our greatest weakness, even mine no matter how advanced I may seem to others. I'm not sure how to conquer this doubting myself but I believe in myself now more than I ever have. It is once I give up that I feel worse than before. If I did not at least attempt it, then how can I doubt myself? With that type of thinking I at least try and somehow it works.

You should at least try your hardest. I am sure you will find the correct path. Once there you will experience plenty of deja vus which tells you that you are correct.

It is strange how the abilities work and lie within us. One question I've always asked myself is how can one person make a difference? I guess that one person can motivate others and make them see things they have not ever seen or knew existed and make them believe.

Kind of off subject but you are the light. Even when you are lost you will light the path to the correct way. Tell me how to stop doubting myself and we'll be even, alright :P
who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts

Hey Reckless,

You are right. I am looking for conformation and that is my greatest flaw. I cant move on with something or develop something further if it is not first conformed which pulls me back and keeps me from going forward.

I am always around my family, and if im not im stuck in my house most of the time and I can still feel their energies in the walls. Just like in people, I can feel energies of animals, plants, rocks, walls, houses, personal items of others. It overwhelms and I guess thats why I can never find the energy to do anything about it, because I can never find peace. But I will try to get away as much as I can.

I do care for my loved ones a lot. And yes hurting them is unimaginable to me. The thought of hurting them even if its for my own good hurts me. And I cant do it.

Deja-vus have been with me since I can remember. Sometimes I even think that Ive dreamed of this exact moment months ago and now it is happening. It always scared me, because how can you dream of something that hasnt happened yet?

What do you mean I am the light? I have heard it from others a few times.

You know I dont think there is a way to stop doubting ourselves. Doubt creates a curiosity in our minds that makes us go out in the world and find some sort of conformation or explanation and in that search we find things that we never thought we would. I think doubt will always be a part of us. You just have to learn to trust yourself.

who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts

Thank you Karen, I cannot express to you how much this means to me. Thank you for taking the time to reply to me. What big thing is coming for me? They are waiting for what?

who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts

I will look into it:)

who_am_I
@who-am-i
last year
27 posts
I will try it, thank you:)

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