Hi Andrea, and Welcome!
I think maybe you are a HSP (highly sensitive person, it's an actual legitimate medical condition) and watching this might help you understand yourself and also help a partner be more compassionate/understanding.
Our societal world is so unbalanced and we are thrown into it, sometimes with little choice, however, that does not mean it is healthy and, I believe, your psyche is telling you that you need to honor the beat of your own drum. You have to be clear on what your own 'healthy' consists of, not what society screams at us is a successful normal. Relax and believe in yourself. What would make you happy?
I would also like to say that a partner should be a blessing, not an energy drain.