Difficulties moving on from marriage problems stunting my spiritual growth
updated by @gem: 03/10/17 12:27:58AM
I have discovered the last few months, despite all being one and the same life force within the universe (all being connected so to speak) we are all to experience an individual route to spiritual understanding, there are so many versions and routes to spiritual enlightenment - Its your path and only what feels right for you is yours, one thing I do know, the more you learn, the more there is to learn
I have been overwhelmed with the amount of healing routes and advice, I think too much input is a big set back.... the ancient wisdoms (regardless of origin) will always say healing and growth comes from within - today so many routes are merged together as `new age` - in truth (at least in my truth) there is only one route and that is the one that works for you individually
.... I believe stones work (in the situation that the stone need be used) I believe meditation works - in the situation that meditation need be used, as does yoga, reiki, aromatherapy ect - All together? I am not so sure, too much of anything runs the risk of it all just being `too much`.
I think we all try and merge so many routes of healing in a desperation to quick fix (I am terrible for it) but, we are trying too much all the time and actually hindering ourselves, the slower the approach and trying out different routes rather than merging them may benefit?
The situation with your husband I feel for you truly, you obviously love him and are doing what you can do to save your marriage and life aint so black and white as many complications are within his past and present - Although hon, (and I mean this in the nicest possible way) his actions, addiction that has left you very low should not be excused by his past.... otherwise he can do whatever he wants on a continuum and there will always be an excuse to make it acceptable.
I was raised in a brutal household, mentally, emotionally and physically, it has indeed had an impact on my life but, in no way can I blame my mistakes made by me nor my selfish behaviours upon it... These words and deeds were always me!
There are so many ways of looking at it, even to a point of maybe what you are going through is part of your spiritual growth? dealing and coping, the action/reaction.. the choices you make upon it all? - That`s only if you look at it from that perspective.
Not having a life and/or spiritual growth manual is excruciating. I can only speak from my own perspective and experiences so I fully respect you may read and say `No, you have it all wrong`.
Everyone deserves happiness, you are going through such a tough time. I do think (again from my experience) that you may be overwhelming yourself with routes of a quick fix as you ask is there anything you are not already doing..... That is not to say I am right though.... Wish I could be of more help, am here to chat though if need be
Hi Gem...I'm so sorry you have to go through this...the fact is...he hurt you, you were NOT responsible for that...he was...he broke a trust and needs to take responibility for it...but...this is about you now...all the methods of ridding yourself of the negative will only work up to a point...I think this situaltion is one where your gonna have to ride the waves of emotions till what ever happens happens...and know it's ok to feel anger...resentment ...pain..hurt and yes... even hate...negative emtions are a part of human beings...no matter how hard we try to suppress them...I personally think they're stupid...lol.....but suppressing them can do more damage as I've discovered myself...this is a big hurt for you...don't bury it for the sake of saving your marriage...things have changed I'm sorry to say...this expereience isn't stunting your spiritual growth...it's helping...anything negative that happens has a purpose...what's this painful experience teaching you? I guess you'll find out...there IS a message in there somewhere...
You will continue to awaken. There is no stopping it now
Why do you feel that you must stay with him? What do you "owe" him, besides the fact that you signed marriage paperwork? You didn't sign your soul away...
If it's too personal and you can't (or don't want to) say, please don't. Just some thoughts to consider <3
It's also possible, that you are confusing his being with you (his "love" for you) as your love for him. I've been with people in the past when I confused the good feeling I got when someone loved me or wanted me (or even their feeling of being in love with me) as my love for them. But when I "stepped away" from the feeling, I realized I didn't even like the person! That is something us empaths need to be aware of. Our feelings can get mixed up with others' feelings.
You will leave him when you're ready. You can't wait or hope or make someone change. If you two are meant to be together, if you separate, you will end up back together when the time is right. ("If you love something, let it go...if it comes back to you, it was yours; if it doesn't, it never was.") So if you are meant to be together...if you are soul mates, twin flames...you will find one another again That is something that is good to know...what happens is for a reason and everything is meant to be and will turn out right in the end. There are no mistakes...only experiences/lessons (and hopefully learning). You've probably gained all that you can from this experience with your husband, and you can find comfort in the thought that your next adventure is up around the bend
In the meantime, time is never wasted. The situations we are in are opportunities for growth, and the most difficult situations produce the most growth! I've noticed lately how I get too comfortable (and even back-track) when life is "easy," so I'm actually starting to enjoy the tough moments...because that is where the growth happens...and then I'll get to the "other side" of ascension faster
My thoughts are with you <3 and my heart feels your pain. What "kills" me is that you are sticking around this guy who brings out panic attacks in you Why do you feel that you deserve to be hurt like that? You don't. If you're an empath, especially, you don't deserve to experience pain. You've been hurt enough.
I know you will do the right thing. It may just take time to figure out and do what your soul is calling you to do...and that's okay It took me a month to tell my ex-husband I was going to be leaving him, after my realization that he wasn't the one for me. So no worries. Do what you need to do when the moment is right. You can't leap unless you're ready