I am so sorry to hear this!
As a person who loves the holidays, I feel bad for those who get stressed. This is the time when you NEED to take a break, take a nice breather, and just remind yourself it can be a good holiday if you want it to be. Forget everyone else's attitudes. If you have a positive attitude, and keep things rolling all day long, NO ONE will be assholes-sorry for the word. Force them to be happy by being overly happy yourself. It will be contagious and everyone will be happy and have a good time. If something starts brewing, interrupt with something fun and light. I do this nearly every holiday, trust me, it works.
Much love and light to you, Rose.