I'm so confused please help

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Whitejade
@whitejade
2 years ago
28 posts

Hi everyone before I write I just want to say that this is very akaward for me to say and I will be doing a lot of ....'
Well I'll start from the beginning I need awnsers this feeling of confusion feels like it's eating me from inside. OK so... About not very long ago are neighbours accidently threw there ball over our fence and they came over at first I could not find it so my mum let them inside. My mum then Asked what school they go to you know normal mother to young children talk all of them were in primary except... For this one guy who said he went to the same school as me mum said oh (my name) goes to that school too he's a year below me in his in year 7 I'm in year 8 but I actually repeated a year so I'm meant to be in year nine well anyways today at school.. While I was eating recess with my friends... (Its hard for me go write this..) He was in a group of his friend and I saw him pointing towards my direction I looked away a bit embarrassed then continued eating then a few minutes later he walked past my group I was on the end of the sitting area and I heard his friend say to him"you can't shes year 8??!? I'm a year 8 girl what the heck??!?? He could of been talking about someone else but I literally can't stop thinking about him his my next door neighbour and to be honest whenever I hang out with my sisters friend who is the little girl next door our neighbour I always see him ride his bike with his little brother and he always comes to tell if she needs to come home or go check on her because his her big brother but I get really happy when I see him.

I also have been to his house with my sister to hang out with the little girl who is 2 years younger then my sister

Well anyways me and my sister had a conversation today and I asked who's your favorite neighbour friend? She said that little girl then she asked mine then she guessed my crushes who I have lost interest in a bit and I said no then she said the little girl and yeah I said no then she said her little brother nope then she said her other brother which is the dude who I'm talking about I still said no but I was happy she said his name because I wanted to try tell her how I was confused then she said his to old for you anyways this angered me my sister is only 10 and she is not attracted to the opposite gender or whatever who sexuality is yet but this made me a bit more uneasy and confused it hurts... I hate this confusion... I keep denying it... I keep thinking no I like (my crushname) not him bit really I have lost a lot of interest in my current crush. i can't stop thinking about him I am not sure if my feelings are real so I don't know I feel like I need approval for some reason? PLEASE HELP ME


updated by @whitejade: 01/13/17 04:11:30AM
KM
@km
2 years ago
90 posts

I can see why people have a difficult time to comment or give advice in this case, although you do sound like you could really use someone to talk this over with. From your note, and not knowing the different characters personally, I am afraid I am just as clueless as to how to help. Look very carefully around you and see if you could find a friend you could discuss this with or even a safe adult. If you don't have anyone come to mind immediately, there is always the school counselor that you could talk with. They keep everything you say confidential.

I am afraid this is my best shot at this.

Gem
@gem
2 years ago
220 posts
It sounds like maybe you're concerned on some level about the age difference and that could be why you feel the need for approval. I'm presuming if your crush feelings were reciprocated by him, which they may be, you wouldn't be pursuing anything that would be of an adult nature..if that's correct then I really wouldn't worry about the age thing as it's only a couple of years difference and we like who we like.Your sister I'm sure didn't mean any harm but I remember well the the heightened feelings of having crushes and how easy it is to feel hurt by what friends or family say.I agree with KM that it very much sounds like you'd like to explore/discuss your feelings about this boy with someone so school counsellor would be my suggestion too. They honestly do keep things confidential (I used to work in a high school here in the UK).Your confusion of course could always be something your picking up emotion wise from the boy since you're an empath?Try not to over analyse it and get your feelings out with a trusted person as that will help you untangle any confusion.Good luck x
Whitejade
@whitejade
2 years ago
28 posts
Wow thank you gem and KM I guess my sister is not a good person to talk too the most sensible person would be my mother why did I never think of talking to someone myself
KM
@km
2 years ago
90 posts

Don't worry. We were young people once. What I do remember from that time is that not having the ability to talk things out, always made things worse. Some people think better when they can bounce things off of other people.

Your sister may even be asking you about how you feel about someone and telling you that good thing you don't have feelings for a person because she may be having feelings for the same person herself. Again, I don't quite know if I am getting the whole thing right. Maybe the age thing has nothing to do with it, she just would like you to think it does.

Whitejade
@whitejade
2 years ago
28 posts
But what do you mean by being young people one? My sis is not intesrted in love yet she told me she's bot even going through puberty so she does not experience the feeling of being attracted so I know that's not be case but and what do you mean about that good thing. Pls explain more your worrying me and plus if she were talking about how she felt which is not possible for her I would feel it I asked her who's your favorite neiughbour and she said the little girl and she or I asked you know mine? And one of her guesses was the guy. Your comment is worrying me
Whitejade
@whitejade
2 years ago
28 posts
BTW guys what bothers me most is the year difference it seems like no one knows what year group aka here grades. Grades are not your smartness group it's year group
KM
@km
2 years ago
90 posts

There is nothing to worry about. I just put information out there. If it does not resonate with you, it usually means that because I am not physically there to see and hear what is going on that I am not picking up correctly what is going on from your initial post.

The same thing happened to 15 other people before me. They looked at your post, but did not quite understand "just what is going on here".

I did not answer the post because I felt I could solve your problem. The problem will ultimately be solved by you, who is BTW closest to the action. I was just lending the ear so you could talk it out, if it turned out that you needed that temporary "ear" until you figured out who closer to you would be a good one to talk with.

It sounded like you could talk with your mother, or like two people here suggested, if you wanted an objective outside person, a school counselor or mentor is another good idea.

At least you sound like you are back in "thinking mode" rather than panic mode. That should help figure things out.

My best wishes to you in your journey!

KM
@km
2 years ago
90 posts

You are correct in picking up that we don't fully understand. That is why the suggestion was made that you seek help locally, closer to where you are. That help will be more meaningful to you. I believe.

:)

Whitejade
@whitejade
2 years ago
28 posts

thank you sorry when i posted that reply i was in a rush so i quickly wrote it out well i have not yet discussed with my mother but i know a good friend who i can

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