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2 years ago
13 posts

Hello Empath Community I am new to this so please bare with me,

I am a born empath, runs in the family. Not always great but it is what it is. Recently I'm finding it hard to find the positive......aspect of my life/sixth sense. Forgive me if I seem a bit pessimistic but, not much good has come from my "gift". As this seems to be a part of my heritage, I feel I should try to learn to understand more on how to control it. Unfortunately my life hasn't been easy and although I always knew (and I KNEW) things would get better it's made me see the negative part of humanity. Once you see that, it's hard to see much else. I'm here to try to find, I guess, like minds and answers (in a way).

Lately, I can't control my overwhelming emotions, feelings, vibes, energies (whatever you want to call it). I find my self working in cubical office to prevent myself from having constant contact with people. And lately I've been almost pulling my hair out because of the energy. I really need to find a way to cope with these feelings. I can't continue going on this way, I have a son and a husband (whom I keep this from) to take care of. Not to mention myself. I've tried meditating, it takes me into a deep place I'm afraid I will not come back from if I give myself over.

I don't know what to do anymore, I'm getting to a point, (please don't judge) where I am smoking weed everyday to cope with it. Dulls my sense, and helps me get through my day, but I can't spend ALL day high. I don't want to.

Please don't give me books to read or links to find, I've read them, I've clicked on them. They don't help, I need a real person to help me. Someone I can feel out, know if their just yanking my chain, or poking fun. And yes, I've had people poke fun, and it's not a feeling I want to experience again.

I know I may be VERY straight forward, but it's me, who I am and what I am and out of everything it's the one thing I WILL embrace.

Any advice anyone can provide, I would greatly appreciate.

I am not a bad person......just tired of sugar coating my words, and I hope this is one place I won't have to.

If I've offended anyone, I am beyond apologetic. Not my intention, just looking

Thanks for reading, even if you have nothing to add.

updated by @jjuniorr: 01/15/17 10:46:17PM
Kit Kat
2 years ago
230 posts

Welcome to the EC! This is a great place for you to find advice and the help you need..

I know it can be hard to see the positive aspects of our abilities, but here are some positive aspects that I've found:

We can have a high level of understanding for others, we can naturally care about other people, and have compassion for them, we think very deeply about life, we have amazing "inner worlds," and if we learn to use our abilities to help people, we can make a big difference in their lives.

I'm really sorry you've had people poke fun at you, and that things have been so rough. Believe me, I don't judge you for the ways you've coped. It's so easy for us, as empaths, to turn to addictions (which I've struggled with before, too), because we have so much to cope with! So I really hope you will have compassion for yourself, with all you've been through - because I can tell it's been a LOT. Here are some of my suggestions:

Build yourself up physically, mentally and emotionally by doing things that bring happiness, and relaxation to you - examples may be reading uplifting books, being creative, or going for walks. Doing these things, while it may be hard, can fill you with light. And the light will not only help you cope, but protect you from others' energies. Plus, these things can help replace your desire to smoke.

Make sure to get at least 8 hours of sleep every night. This is really important for empaths especially, because we tend to use up our energy faster than the average person. So I've found that sleep is a saving grace for me..

Find ways to use your abilities to help people. This really has been one of my biggest ways of coping. There is so much joy that can be found from using these abilities in everyday life... I've found that even just smiling at people can be a way to make a difference.

Lastly, I just want to say that I understand how easy it is for us, as empaths, to deprive ourselves of things we need, in order to make life 'better' for other people. But one of the best things we can do for those around us is to love and take care of ourselves. So I hope that you will maybe see some ways that you can better take care of yourself, after reading this. There are a lot of needs that we have that are somewhat different from those who aren't empaths (for example, the need to work alone, the need to be creative, the need to take our time), and these things can help to free us from suffering, when we give them to ourselves.

I hope this helps, and that things get better <3

2 years ago
13 posts
Thank you so much kit Kat, reading your suggestions does make me feel better, your suggestions are possible, somethings I CAN do everyday. It was nice to see there really is someone who understands and has been though similar difficulties and has made it through. Gives me hope. Thank you for that. The needs that empaths have are so true, but I ignore them becuase of my need to put everyone first. I will do what you've suggested and I feel that it may be the right road for me to start on. Thank you again. You made me greatful that I've come here for insight.
2 years ago
19 posts

I can't give you advice but I can say I understand. I only figured out that I am an empath in the last year and with everything I learn it's like I open more and open up and now I am trying to figure out how to not close it off but to level it out. It's hard. The energy around me has been very negative lately and has put me in a dark place, I am a happy person so this has been rough, I can't seem to block it. So yeah I understand, you are not alone!!!

Kit Kat
2 years ago
230 posts
You're very welcome! I'm so happy to hear that you're finding more hope, and the right path for you. Thank you for writing such a sweet reply. It means a lot to me! May you receive strength and light on your journey :)
2 years ago
82 posts

I will try to keep this short which seems to be a challenge for me. I didn't read any of the other replies, so I am starting from the top. My life has not been easy either. The world is not a safe place to be. Yes, humans are exactly that ... humans. They do what they do. Simply accept. Nonjudgmental acceptance. Hey, didn't say it was easy. Remember if you concentrate on the negative, then that is what you get. Negative. It is your choice. Can you change the reality which is the 'negative part of humanity'? Not really. You can change yourself and how you deal with it.

Let it go. You can't control what other people or groups of people do. You only control what you do in response to it. If you can't change a thing, then stop, let it go. Don't dwell on the negative. Change your thought patterns. Change negative thoughts to positive. Your choice.

Don't be too harsh on you. You are doing the best you can with what you have. You are trying to protect yourself from outside energies. Fact, you cannot be around people unless you are allowing yourself time to recuperate. Make sure you are having down time to read, be in nature, listen to music, etc. What are your survival skills? After a day of work around people with all their energies and feelings I come home to quiet. I read, work on my website, cook, but I am left alone. My husband understands it is a requirement for me to have this time. I can lean on my husband and feel his comfortable energy. My son and grandchildren understand I may shut myself in my bedroom to recuperate when they visit. Of course, they have their own gifts.

Your family need to understand you require time to recuperate. It isn't a bad thing. It is just what you need. Plus, if in runs in the family, then your child may need to learn how to cope as well.

Many empaths and others with gifts use a band aid to cope. It is not unusual. I get the impression it is common. You might see a doctor and have something prescribed. My doctor when I had PTSD suggested I take a medication to help. I told him I wanted something which did not take my feelings away. When it came time for me to feel again, then I wanted to be able to do so. I simply needed something which would make me feel better. It helped me have the strength to rewire my brain. I haven't had a symptom in years.

Poke fun? No. I take my gifts serious. Every gift has two sides regardless of what the gift is. Taking my gifts away would be like taking one of my others senses away. Forget that.

So, ask your guides/guardians/angels for help. Learn how to meditate without harming yourself. Learn coping skills, such as quiet time, etc. Share with your family and let them know what you need. They may need the same. Stop concentrating on the negative and change your thoughts to positive. You are what you eat and you are what you think.

It takes practice and you might not want to change your lifestyle. It is your choice. Again, I am sorry this is not going to be easy. It took me three years after being diagnosed with PTSD to get rid of it. Making choices to change your life ... for me if was so worth it. I wake smiling everyday. Bad things still happen, but whatever it is will be temporary.

This is brief and possibility confusing for you. I suggest you start with allowing yourself time to recuperate. Find better ways to protect yourself. Accept you need down time. Nonjudgmental acceptance. Let it go if you can't change it or change the way you are thinking about it. Sometimes you just have to let someone in your life go their on way. You have another journey. It isn't theirs to understand. You have your own journey.

Good hunting on your journey! Love and Light. Always feel free to reach out to me.

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