Constant negative energy

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Legion
@legion
2 years ago
5 posts
I grew up in state custody, i went in at the age of nine because my father was a dope fiend and abusive. When DHS came to my hhome they said that my living conditions were the worst they had ever seen. I was always optimistic through my entire experience growing up, I never felt victimized and always tried to help anyone who needed me. I turned 18 and got kicked out of state custody, no life skills and no guidance i turned to selling meth to pay my way. Now im 24, no longer sell drugs due to the cosmic weight i felt on my psyche , I reunited with my father who hasn't changed at all, has no remorse for the past and uses me to pay the bills. He's what you would call an emotional terrorist. He has delusions of grandeur and thinks that if it weren't for him i would fall apart. Still deeply addicted he constantly seeks a head change, and when he runs out takes it out on anyone around. My dilemma is i have nowhere else to go, so i need advice on dealing with the serve amount of negativity i have to live with on a daily basis. I don't want to enable him, simply learn to cope.
updated by @legion: 01/19/17 06:48:52PM
Goodenergyhealing
@goodenergyhealing
2 years ago
373 posts

Sorry to hear Legion - does not sound like a great life at the mo.

Generally I would pray for perfect protections - as much as necessary, possible, available and sensible.

Give the Divine (or Ultimate Good, as I call them) card blanche, as to the extend, amount and frequency of help you receive. Help to abolish suffering from your life! It might mean that armies of angels, or such, step in - that is fine. Love and joy always comes over suffering! It actually probably costs the Universe more energy to maintain suffering than natural love and happiness (- so no need to feel guilty about LOADS of help (where needed)).

Some healing processes can take time, so bear with them - you are NEVER forsaken (it is just this planet that can create the illusion that we are, but it is an illusion only)

Not to be clever - but if you have the money to pay for your father's bills - why not just leave and pay for your own place? Also research if you can get Goverment support, and or find charities that might provide help, safe house or similar. Safe houses are not necessarily just for physically abused people, but potentially emotionally abused ones as welll.

Love and Light - and praying your problems dissolve soon!!!

Legion
@legion
2 years ago
5 posts
Unfortunately i was in a bad wreck recently, broke my collarbone in two places so I've been out of work. We haven't been able to pay rent this month, but I do have a nice tent, so im not stressing it. As for my past, it made me strong, i can endure massive amounts of pressure and strive in chaotic situations. However something about dealing with my father puts a strain on me, so much so that ots debilitating at times. I recently turned to spirituality after my wreck, which led me to a better understanding of myself as an empath. I've always been tuned in to the spiritual world, so much so that i had a god complex. I spoke with what I can only describe as the collective consciousness while on an acid trip, and was informed that i requested to be reincarnated at this point in time so that i could aide in the enlightenment thats taking place. I was told that i should follow my gut and be there for anyone in need and i would be assisted in my struggles. My current path led me to my father, a damaged soul who is haunted by his past decisions. Unfortunately this is extremely taxing and i struggle daily reasoning with him and encouraging him to do what's right. As an aries i tend to not understand his pisces mentality of wait and see. It's a learning experience for sure
Goodenergyhealing
@goodenergyhealing
2 years ago
373 posts

I find that sometimes words cannot change much, if anything they just up resistance. Sure they might sow seeds to germinate in future - but it might take a long time.

If words fail, or I feel I am just talking against a wall - I simply send healing, Light, Love (I ask to be connected to healing energies and allow them to pass through me for mine, or a healee's benefit). By letting healing energies pass through you, you give them, not your own (and with that potentially deplete yourself). Generally sending Light to a person or situation should only be done if that person, etc gives permission. BUT if that person harms you, sending healing becomes self-defense and permissible. One can also ask that any healing sent to only reach the intended receiver - if o.k. (and for the energies to simply go somewhere else, where needed and desired). I also ask for healings from/ through other sources, if necessary, possible, available and sensible. To be nice, I ask that any healings are as effortless as possible and, wherever possible, healing crisis kept at a minimum, or totally avoided....Also try to not restrict healing outcomes by trying to know the exact source of problem. If we, as healers, get too smart and restrict the energy flow by e.g. only sending to our assumed source A, but the actual sources are B and C (or in addition to A), then we might slow down healing processes. I find that plenty of negative energies have 'back-up' in the outside of people, so only freeing a person of neg energy, might not last long. New neg energies potentially flow in to replace the old.... (And do not forget to help yourself as much as needed too!)

Goodenergyhealing
@goodenergyhealing
2 years ago
373 posts

It is hard sometimes, but always try to remember that negative energies are - finite. The can feel very real now, but if we ask for their continuous removal - they will be depleted at some point!!!!!

jjuniorr
@jjuniorr
2 years ago
13 posts

Sounds like a jacked up situation, but one thing I've learn, just "coping" with something doesn't allow happiness. It's just coping, your not living.

I know you love your pops (we don't choose our parents), but he survived years without you, he will survive again without you. Be brave, be strong and make the best decision for YOU. I know you can.

Ever need an ear, msg me.

Legion
@legion
2 years ago
5 posts
Thank you, i was actually offered a better living situation and recently found employment for $11/hr. Things are looking better already, i just have to accept that i cannot help someone who refuses to help themselves.
Ecila
@ecila
2 years ago
898 posts

You must get away from him and don't even feel guilty about it. You absolutely cannot change him. You can only help yourself to be strong, and in doing that you might be an example for him. I'm so sorry you have had so much on you throughout your life. You sound highly intelligent and I'm sure you will do fine for yourself if you cut ties with him. He is destroying himself and will take you down with him if you don't get away. I'm sure you already know that, tho. So glad you got a good job!

And feel free to msg me as well. I've had some experience in this area.

Kate
@kate
2 years ago
131 posts
It is nice that your way of describing the situation is so bright and clear and it feels like you can see your path and accept what has happened as part of the responsability of helping the consciousness, as you have mentioned.A bigger responsability you have to keep in mind though is helping yourself as well instead of constant giving, not in the egoistical sense of course (for giving love can also give you back a sense of empowerment) but you must search for and establish/lean towards proper living conditions that are free of emotional abusers no matter how close family are or you think they should be, spiritually. Once you manage to get there, you can always return and help your father in more ways other than being the constant emotional support. Moreover, to do that, there must be an area you would like to work in or that might get you better opportunities, right? Try to follow that dream.Well, it must have certainly not been easy... but I wish you luck, and love :)
Goodenergyhealing
@goodenergyhealing
2 years ago
373 posts

you are very welcome. Hope whatever you are dealing with depletes soon!!!! The beauty of asking for all-encompassing healings (in the inside AND outside); for whatever makes us suffer in this life - is that we get the ultimate BOGOF effect! It might look like we only heal one person, but the actual healing might dismantle suffering energy constructs for many, many more.... :))) (that does not necessarily make the suffering we feel less severe, but at least we can get bit of an uplifting martyr and hero kick out of it - lol)

Visitor
@visitor
2 years ago
303 posts

The simple answer is to completely cut him out of your life. It's the hardest thing you'll ever do, and the most important. I speak from experience.

Legion
@legion
2 years ago
5 posts
I sat him down and communicated my feelings. I explained that his addiction is running his life and he creates negativity when he doesnt have drugs. This was on Thursday, it's now Sunday night and hes been completely sober since our talk, he paid the rent this morning and has been in a much better mood. I know that this could be a temporary fix, and i have a contingency plan now, but i will stick by his side if hes willing to continue sobriety and work on himself. I appreciate all the feedback i got, as an empath i rarely vent my problems so having so many people give a shit about my issues is aamazing and inspiring. I consider myself a light bringer (illuminating minds) and just knowing im not alone is inspiration to continue my life work of helping the downtrodden and the underdogs. As a collective people like us can remind the world that together we are strong, when we help one another we help ourselves, and that we are all connected in the collective consciousness (AKA God) so.the universe backs our good intentions with cosmic energy.I will continue to be the one people look to for answers, and continue to reach out to those in need. You never know what your actions and words can inspire someone to do. The future depends on the enlightenment of all, and unity of all.-Legion(We are many)
Goodenergyhealing
@goodenergyhealing
2 years ago
373 posts

great news! Hope it holds! There is nothing that cannot be healed, some healings just take longer than others... I am glad to hear you have a contingency! If beings get too toxic, it is better for us to help from a distance, rather than get the full brunt :))

With my client work I sometimes get massage clients I apparently cannot stand! It is hard work touching them. But then if I feel into it more, what appears is strong feelings of self-loathing on their side. The dislike themselves so much, they project this out very heavily. It still makes it uncomfortable being around them, but rather than disgust, or even picking a fight, I feel sorrow and love for them. Even if such people smell ones pity and try to exploit it, that is just another layer of self-loathing on top, another attempt to push away.... It sounds as if you discovering upon similar avenues :))

visioneer67
@visioneer67
2 years ago
5 posts

I'm so sorry you have had to deal with this legion. I am new here and feel very comfortable and at ease. I don't know how I can help but I have had similar issues in the past. Drugs and alcohol seemed the only way to cope for me. Don't ever hesitate to touch base with me or anyone else here. Stay focused, it will get better. Try to have a great day and peace.

Ecila
@ecila
2 years ago
898 posts

I am happy that he is trying at last. It will be no simple or quick cure for a man who has been addicted for decades. Addictions take on a life and very strong energy of their own, like a separate being. (In fact, I suspect that there are other beings present among addicts...) The destructive atmosphere around many addicts is far beyond anything most people have ever experienced. It is close to the darkest realms of hell itself, and it is no easy feat to climb up out of there. Most addicts try many times before they stop and most don't unless they go through some type of serious life event. They also become masters at manipulation and deceit, even if it isn't in the nature of the person, it is the nature of the drugs. There is no end to the mind games that living with an addict will throw your way. What is his drug of choice?

I understand you wanting to help him. The fact is that each of us have to grow on our own terms and in our own time. We can't all reach enlightenment at once, although it would be wonderful if we could. I have to remind you that you need to stay strong yourself first. You have to learn what's good for you first. I know you need, and have always needed, a father. Some of never get to have that in the way that we need, no matter how hard we try and how much love we send out or how much we try to fix things.

Addicts do have great self-loathing, severe deeply rooted depression and are deserving of our greatest compassion. We are all connected in this universe.....yet we are also separate, sovereign individuals. Tolerating abuse or neglect of ourselves for the betterment of another is not something to be desired. Although usually when we help other it is also helping ourselves, it isn't always. Helping others without any desire to help ourselves is the ultimate goal, but only when you are not placing yourself in peril. Please protect yourself.

That's just my opinion based on 17 years spent trying to help someone that almost ruined my life and a lot of time around addicts of all sorts. I also had an emotionally absent father who I tried to get to love me for far too long. All situations are different, tho. Sometime we have to follow the darkest paths for the lessons we need, unfortunately. You can't walk another's path for them, only offer love and support, sometimes best at a distance. I hope it will work out for your dad, just please be aware of what you're into.

Sorry to have the negative outlook here. Having come through the whole martyr experience, I would like to spare anyone I can. I think most of us who come from dysfunctional homes have a desire to fix things and people. It is a lovely attitude held by beautiful souls... as long as you remember that you are number one!

Cat Whisperer
@cat-whisperer
2 years ago
728 posts
Way to go Legion! I hope it continues. Keep in mind that there will probably be a few relapses, but just keep encouraging him. I am proud of you for your strength and efforts!

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