Sometimes crying makes you feel better. Kinda like letting all of the negative energy flow out. I have had people that move away from me too. It is bothersome, but don't let it get to you. I used to work with someone that would move away from me. Like a few coworkers would be standing around talking, I would walk up to joint in, if I would join in right next to her, she would immediately move away. I would move close again, she would move. After a while I found it rather humorous. Hang in there, all will be ok.
Hi Minty,14 is a tough age for everyone.14 is about as tough as it gets. It gets better from here on in. Slowly, slowly.The other kids will start maturing and growing up. By the start of next year you will hardly recognise them. When they start back after the Xmas summer holidays next year you will be shocked at how much nicer they are.If a new student starts school, perhaps you could offer them a seat next to you. If not, just sit quietly and know that an angel has come to sit next to you.I think there are kids who secrectly admire your individualism, but they probably won't tell you until years later.My understanding of high functioning autism is that although you may find a couple of things a little difficult at times, your brain is actually brilliant in many other ways your school friends could only dream of. Sometimes it takes time to find our true talents. Stick with the things you enjoy. Find something to be passionate about. Head in the direction of the things that you love and enjoy.The world is about to open up for you. Quite soon you might be able to get a part-time job and the cash will give you the freedom to buy the things you want.Find a teacher you like and ask them for any help you think would benefit you.Do you know the poem "desiderata"? You can google it. I was given a copy when I was a teenager and I really liked it.You'll be okay.
Don't change yourself for others. Wear your bow tie proudly and accept the fact that you may be alone for some time.I can say that trying to be a part of the crowd isn't worth it. I tried and failed. In a class where no one knew how smart I was, I didn't act like the smart guy for many reasons. When everyone found out, they were pissed. They demanded answers for tests and didn't talk to me for having the highest grade. Even the people who sat next to me formed a new group where I was not invited. Of course it got to me but I knew it was nothing I could do. Eventually they started being friendly to me, and not for the answers since tests were different.As an adult at a job, I told everyone I was nothing but a nerd. It was to keep them off me. It did the exact opposite. Everyone wanted to get to know me and would talk to me and all. Of course there were jealous guys but not as many as before, didn't help my boss was one.These days it is like everyone is looking for me. They know I am a nerd too. Who doesn't? They still want to be just like me, and even the cooler guys that wouldn't talk to me want to be around me. Even the finest of women want me and I'm just myself. It is strange how once you drop everything and stop trying that everyone starts to revolve around you as if you're important like some celebrity. People that know me would claim I'm famous or something crazy, but I'm just a nerd that enjoys himself and careless of what others think or say, but not in a rude way.I always encourage the next person to be their best selves because we are all too unique to be overlooked or passed off as a replica of the next person.