Dreams about old man death
During a meditation I was taken to what felt like an all too real version of this dream. I could feel and smell the air. It felt more like astral projection than lucid dreaming.
Allusion to this dream constantly pop up in my life.
So your dream is basically about dying and meeting the grim reaper?
Dreams are always tricky to pinpoint the cause or reason. As humans we dream to solve problems and work through issues. A dream interpreter or psychologist would probably tell you that you must have a deeply subconscious fear of death. There is some hidden meaning in your name being circled and the mixed up pages on the floor that you are sorting through but not able to read. But people (and especially empaths) get dreams sent to them for the purpose of messages or learning. But I'm not sure that I can see any connection to a lesson with in what you explained. It's usually pretty obvious and less of a mystery when you are being sent a dream to learn from.
The meditating part of it is also interesting. Although if you were by chance lucid dreaming then it would not surprise me that your subconscious led you back to a reoccurring dream. There may be some issue there your deep mind wants to resolve.
I will say that when I dream and draw in other senses, that is usually worth noting. It's almost like highlighting something specific. This could be either a message to you or else your subconscious is in itself noting particular emphasis on that one part. You may want to make a mental note to try to hone in on and try to remember what exactly is happening in the dream next time to determine what is going on when you feel and smell the air. Like a detective try to note who,why,where,when at that point. There may be something to be revealed.
I can only say that when I am given a lesson or communication in a dream that it is usually a one-time thing. Any reoccurring dreams that I have tend to be what I would call unexplainable things my brain was working out. But that's just me. Everyone is a little different. So maybe others here can draw from their personal experiences and help you sort this out.
As far as the dream it is definitely death and his list. It's never said as no one says anything in the dream. It's an intuition that usually comes with my dreams. If it was a lucid dream it is the most realistic one I have ever had. Usually when I have lucid dreams I know I'm dreaming and can exhibit some amount of control. However in this case I felt like I was waking from sleep but when I opened my eyes i was not in the real world. The only thing I know for sure is that I was just supposed to be an observer. I have never had another meditation like that. In fact it's gotten harder.
But I am going to use some of the ideas from the Watts lecture about letting go and being empty as I meditate and see.
I don't always dream but when I do there is always something to it. Usually I can figure it out pretty quickly but this has me stuck.
I did have issues in the past about dying. But the were never about me. I don't deal with loss very well.
updated by @crystalsage: 01/10/18 03:01:48PM
I tried to write a poem about the dream and I could only come up with one line. "Sitting next too death in a dream planning my life a change."
At the time when the dream occurred I had dealt with depression but never had a single suicidal thought in my life. The meditation occurred as I was moving to California. It was here that the suicidal thoughts began. Last year was the worst it ever got. Whilei did not physically try to kill myself I had a detailed plan I could not talk myself out of.
Long story short I ended up I the hospital on a three day hold. But I have to say that event saved me in many ways.
Last year was when I finally realized I was an empath. I've always had gifts, but I've always pushed them to the side. Last year I had to make a choice explore being an empath and see where it takes me. Or ignore iut and let the ignorance slowly kill me.
Now I think I understand why it's on my mind now.
Last year was a 9. And my intuition has been telling me for about as long as I had, had the dream that my freedom would come in a nine. And I feel like I have reach a while new point in my life.
Thank you again.
Wow. You have quite a story there. I’m glad to hear that you didn’t hurt yourself. And I can tell from the tone in your posts that your life is on the rise right now. And your curiosity about your gifts has given you a new lease on life. Good for you!
I can relate to the anxiety and confusion that you went through before understanding that you are an empath. The awakening process for many empaths can be painful and lonely. When was the last time that you had the dream? And what do you mean by “last year was a 9”?
Take a look at the below post link as I think it may help should you ever feel down in the future. Being an empath can drain you mentally and physically. And studies have shown when people are thinking about suicide that they are lacking optimal brain chemistry. And the good news is that this can be improved fairly quick.