• one week ago •
"Interesting.. I was in therapy after my husband had walked out of the marriage he became extreamly emotionally abusive. I was telling him in one of the..."
• 2 months ago •
"I need help or something/anything"
"As someone who has been to hell and back some days you need to remember to breath. People can only take from u what u allow them to take. It has taken me a..."
I am really lost and really hurting I have always knowing i was different but my therapist has just added the empath part to it all. There is more to it but i am not read to share.. I told my parents (late 70, early 80's and after i got laughed at the told be that at 40 i should have grown out that crap by now. 4 years ago my soul mate walked out of our marriage of almost 20 years cleaning out the bank accounts including the kids to take his girlfriend of a trip (a honeymoon something promised but i never got) i quit my career to support his and he thats the kids and i with some of the worst mental abuse the court have seen... its a long story... the girlfriend is 6 and 7 years older than our kids. my estranged husband was one year younger than me. he had to make sure the night of my 40th birthday he let me know that he was trading in for a younger model (19 years difference) who isn't scared up .. i have a 10 inch scar on my tummy area from the summer before when i almost lost my life... fast forward 3 years i get the courage to try to date. (yes the abuse from the estranged exists but i wont be ruled by it ant it has slowed down so the kids and i are rebuilding lives) The second person i met online i fell for before ever meeting, it was like i have always known him. We actually met on aug 11.. within 5 min we couldn't keep our hands off each other it was insain crazy. I thought maybe for me it was no relationship for over 3 years but he felt it too. He was alway honest about being at the end of the end of a relationship and working on calling it off.. next time i saw him he was so free and light.. he told me he was single.. we could proceed at how fast or slow i wanted to.. he works out of town all week.. by the following friday i found out that his girlfriend had plans. I was about to break up with him. I found that same need he had to make sure we were still friends pushed me to kiss and hold his hands.. i couldn't understand it.. The next 2 months the more i was with him the more i felt complete... i have never felt things i felt while i looked in his eyes as he looked at me... er alway needed to touch each other.. even if it is just his back while he cook supper.. nothing like with my estranged husband.. but the 2 relationships was killing killing him... he went into counseling to get help breaking up with his gf of 5 years and the last year he spent frustrated with her... instead he disappeared on me... I always told him my biggest fear was he would abandon me... when he just stopped talking i didn't beg... i left the app alone and got mt tarot read.. how i found out he is my twin flame... as of todays dates he still doesn't know we are twin flames, just bonded and he feels the strength of spirit and the bond. i got him a tarot reading for Christmas as far as i know he hasn't bothered getting it read. yes he works out of town during the week.. but where there is a will there is a way... i don't understand him at all after a month and a half not talking to me he got me a $250 extreamly special present.. something i would have never expected.. what made it even more amazing is my ex had managed to rule my Christmas this year... his gift to me was the only thing i got... he was back im my life until the end of jan after he had promised he wouldn't just disappear like that (i don't understand why everyone abandons me including my kids (however that has to do with my ex's manipulatulation) i had no friends growing up and only a couple in my adult years. my estranged husband is the longest friend i have ever had) what I need help with is understanding twin flames and why for the intense emotions I feel he keeps running away.. my therapist is really good with the life stuff but has never had a twin flame client.. trust me with my life wasn't my choices either. I don't understand why he breaks his promises so i can't reach him on that app.. i don't want to and who knows if i want use his phone number. I get the gut feeling that he is being honest with his therapist this time. it was her plan they try his relationship one more try.. no out sit scanky forces (thats when i asked what he said about be... nothing.. that yes he had an affair... i was the light and beauty in his life.. he was not going to tell the therapist about something so pure and beautiful when therapy is about the dark and the pain... told him as beautiful as that sounds she needs both.. the full picture.... I think she (his therapist) has it all.. just a jut feeling... but that is all my empathy is... gut feelings.. i am sorry i am rambling on so much.. i am just tired of my heart hurting.. 4 years now.. i think i start moving forward and i seem to end up further back.. if u have so idea how to walk way from the twin flame and make it so my heart can be protected i wonder if thats the best... love is just a concept to set me up for more hurt and i don't know how much more i can take. It u don't agree with that but with the few different year outlook tarot readings my twin flame and are to be together but but I am lost on how and what.. I am a taurus.. a person on motion to get results waiting doesn't help.. i feel that i have been forgotten about. after all he has a gf to go home to ever weekend.. he uses to send me a thinking of u messages even if i couldn't answer..that was at the beginning now it is radio silence.. he hasn't even looked at them in 3 weeks... i was upset that he promised at the beginning everything was going to be simple.. now that I am done rambling do u have any help on the twin flames? and how empath fit inti twin paths? be are already both in our 40's.. both of us have had hard lives including love lives... if at a possible i need hope. and i am really sorry i waisted so much of your time with my story... it and the tears seamed to flow together.
Just wondering if somehow this crappy thing called life makes sense to someone else. I have gotten a few readings done and they all seem to say the same thing. I believed in reading with all my heart for my whole life until this last month, Now I am wondering if I am just that easy to read that different readers are getting the same future. As for twin flames, from what I understand it is more complex than a soul mate. A twin flame has a female and male part of one soul like the ying and yang. There will always be romantic feelings involved, if followed that depends upon the 2 parties involved. Everyone has a twin flame, if they are on this or another plane is the bigger question. It is a very powerful union but the journey to get to the union is hard and very painful and can take a lifetime to achive. Where a soul mate can be anyone from a partner to a sibling, a friend, a parent, even a pet. They are a group of souls yours travels with through each lifetime. There is also a karmic relationship where u will keep meeting the same person until your soul has learned what was required. Once learned u will not meet again in any life time. I have actually had 2 soul mate relationship - 1 with my ex-husband (not all soul mate relationship are meant to last but to teach and to move on) and 1 with a good friend of mine. Her and I are mirror soul mates meaning in many ways are lives are mirror image's of each other. I have also had a karmic relationship. He was the very first person I was with after my ex and he taught me that it was ok to live again. Then I met my twin flame and for a brief moment I knew what I felt like to be truly complete and whole, that all the crap in the rest of my life somehow didn't feel so bad. It was my crap and I still dealt with it on my own but a text from him would make me smile, a hug from him was like walking in sunshine, and a cuddle that was a perfect vacation for a couple of hours, but like all twin flames just as we were really getting to know each other he ran, abandoning me without a goodbye. I don't know why I expected anything different, every person I have loved has abandoned me including my kids running away to live friends or boyfriends (depending which kid) when they hit the age of 16. I was in touch with my twin flame around the beginning of the new year but he has run again. The running is all part of the twin flame relationship. As explained to me they run cause the emotions are so overwhelming they don't know any other way of handling it. All i know it it hurts far worse than anything else I have been through. Also just to add salt to all the other emotional pain as a twin flame thereis a bond between us so a times we can feel what each other is feeling. I can only ever pick up on the painful feelings and I don't know I am doing it. Where would I even begin on trying to block it. So advice on how to deal with a lifetime of emotional pain and how not to let the emotional side swallow you whole would be helpful
private would be awesome but i have no idea how. i just got to the point were i don't know who to talk to and i could keep having the same conversation with myself
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